but I get sad when I think about it.

但我一想到這裡，就會很難過。

So I'm never gonna tell that story again.

所以我再也不會講這個故事了。

C'mon... Pretty Please?

來吧...漂亮嗎？

I even found an old picture from that time.

我甚至找到了當時的一張老照片。

What do you think, old me?

你覺得呢，老子？

should I tell them our story?

我應該告訴他們我們的故事嗎？

yeaaaaaaaaah!

是啊aaaaaaaaaah！

I wanna fight!

我想打架！

You should be in school!

你應該在學校裡！

I'd rather jump off this cliff!

我寧願跳下這個懸崖!

Weeeeeee!

Weeeeeeeee!

Fine! You can learn how to fight!

好吧，你可以學學怎麼打架

Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!

呀呀呀呀呀！

But first you have to learn your origin bedtime story

但首先你要學習你的起源睡前故事。

But mom! Books are boring!

但是媽媽！書本很無聊！

But this book is fully animated

但這本書是完全動畫化的

It even has voice overs!

它甚至還有配音！

Wow!

哇！

Hey everyone, I'm Zeus!

大家好，我是宙斯！

I created humans and I think they're pretty great!

我創造了人類，我覺得他們非常棒!

Well I'm Ares the god of war

我是戰神阿瑞斯。

and I think they're bad!

我覺得他們很壞！

Well then I'm going to banish you to earth!

好吧，那我就把你放逐到地球上！這就是我的目的。

Ha ha! Dummy! Now I'm just gonna cause war on earth!

哈哈！笨蛋！現在，我只是要去引起地球上的戰爭！

Then with my last bit of strength...

然後用我最後一點力氣... ...

I will leave a god killing weapon on an island of women!

我要在女人島上留下一把殺神武器!

I always did like the ladies....

我一直喜歡女士們....。

bleeeegh

咩咩

Is the ultimate weapon me?

終極武器是我嗎？

Uh... no dum dum, it's this sword!

呃... ... 不，不，是這把劍!

Oh.

哦。

Did you tell Diana the truth?

你有沒有告訴戴安娜真相？

That she is the weapon?

她是武器？

She doesn't need to know that!

她不需要知道這些！

It's literally her reason for existing!

這簡直是她存在的理由!

We have to stretch this out for at least 2 hours.

我們至少要把它延長兩個小時。

Now, how can we seemlessly age her into an adult?

現在，我們怎樣才能讓她看似無憂無慮地長大成人？

I'll start the montage

我先來個蒙太奇

sneaking out and

偷偷摸摸

swinging swords

揮刀

and stabbin spears

和刺賓槍

and sneakin out

和偷偷摸摸的出來

and riding horses

和騎馬

and shootin bows

和射擊弓

and shootin bows

和射擊弓

and pointin swords

劍指

Mom's watching now oh my gosh

媽媽在看，天哪

dont mess up now. You're so dang close

不要搞砸了。你就差一點

Mess up almost immediately

亂七八糟，幾乎是立竿見影

OH CRAP YOU ALMOST KILLED YOUR AUNT

哦，媽的，你差點殺了你姑姑。

Now walk away.....

現在走開.....

Ugh!

啊！

I need a nap

我需要睡一會兒

AAaaaaaaaaaaaagh!

AAaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh！

Someone freakin help meeeeeeee!

誰來幫幫我！

Fine!

好吧！

This is bad!

這很糟糕！

Oh... you're just gonna stand there?

哦... ... 你只是要站在那裡？

I guess I'll die now.

我想我現在會死了。

Odensleep!

睡覺！

Ooh!

哦！

Hello

你好

Oh my gosh! You're so hot!

哦，我的天啊，你真性感！

you are so hot!

你是如此的熱！

Wanna have an action scene?

想來一場動作戲嗎？

Do I ever!

我有嗎？

Oh you meant this kind of action scene

哦，你說的是這種動作戲

That's what I meant too!

我也是這個意思!

What did you think I meant?

你以為我是什麼意思？

Uhhhhhhh.

呃，呃，呃，呃。

Nothing.

什麼都沒有。

Now I just need a close relative to die tragically...

現在我只需要一個近親慘死... ...

so I can start being a super hero.

這樣我就可以開始成為一個超級英雄。

As you wish!

如你所願！

There we go!

我們走吧！

You will tell us who you are and why you are here!

你要告訴我們你是誰，你為什麼在這裡!

No!

不！

Come on... pretty please?

來吧... ... 漂亮的請？

I'm totally a spy!

我完全是個間諜！

And I stole this book from the bad guys!

我還從壞人那裡偷來了這本書!

And I have to get back to London...

我得回倫敦了... ...

Or else this war is NEVER gonna end!

否則，這場戰爭永遠不會結束!

War!

戰爭！

War means, Ares! We must stop him!

戰爭意味著，阿瑞斯！我們必須阻止他！

No! Go away!

不，走開！

I'm so conflicted!

我很矛盾!

What should I do, cow?

我應該怎麼做，牛？

Dis obey your mommy!

聽你媽的！

Okay!

好吧！

Gimme dat!

給我數據！

And dat!

還有那個！

Aaaaaand That!

Aaaaaaaand That!

What are you doing?

你在做什麼？

I'm taking this hottie, and we are gonna stop Ares!

我帶著這個辣妹，我們要去阻止阿瑞斯！

Yeah!

是啊！

wait. What?

等等，什麼？ぐ或?

Cool. Good luck.

爽啊好運。

You're not going to try to stop me?

你不打算阻止我？

No.

不知道

Do you think I could have that magic book...

你覺得我能擁有那本魔法書嗎... ...

so I can remember what Ares looks like?

這樣我就能記住阿瑞斯的樣子了？

No.

不知道

Hey poison lady.

嘿，毒婦。

I need you to make me something strong enough to fight a super hero

我需要你給我做一些足夠強大的東西來對抗一個超級英雄

I got you fam

我抓到你了，範姆

I don't know...

我不知道...

Is this FDA approved?

這是FDA準許的嗎？

Oooooooo Yeeeeaaaaah

Oooooooo Yeeeeeeaaaaah。

Where are we?

我們在哪裡？

Welcome to the world of man!

歡迎來到人類的世界!

This place sucks!

這地方真爛！

Ugh... there's also tons of babies!

呃......還有大量的寶寶!

This place rocks!

這地方真不錯！

No Diana! We have to be careful!

不，戴安娜！我們必須小心！

German spies are everywhere.

德國間諜無處不在。

What? No they're not.

什麼？ - 不，他們不是不，他們不是。

Freeze! ha ha!

不許動，哈哈！

Told you.

我就說吧

Give us back that book you stole!

把你偷的書還給我們！

Take this instead!

拿這個代替！

you can stop bullets?

你能擋住子彈？

That's right I can, Sucka!

是的，我可以，吸卡！

Do it again!

再來一次！

And again!

再來一次！

And again!

再來一次！

Wow! That book must be important!

譁！那本書一定很重要！那本書一定很重要！

Steve Trevor, you're back!

史蒂夫-特雷弗，你回來了！

Yes General! Please look at this book!

是的，將軍！請看這本書！

The bad guys are developing a gas that will destroy everything

壞人正在開發一種能摧毀一切的氣體。

You have to let us go stop them!

你必須讓我們去阻止他們！

That's dumb! You're dumb!

這是愚蠢的！你真笨！

I think you should let them go!

我覺得你應該讓他們走！

You can trust me!

你可以相信我！

I'm not the real bad guy or anything.

我不是真正的壞人或任何東西。

See! The not really the bad guy guy thinks we should go!

看吧！那個不是真的壞人的傢伙認為我們應該走了!

Fine.

好吧

Alright let's go. Time to get the runnin crew together!

好吧，我們走吧。時間得到運行的船員在一起！

Runnin crew, introduce yourselves!

奔跑的隊員們，自我介紹一下！

I like to lie.

我喜歡撒謊

I have PTSD!

我有創傷後應激障礙！

And I'm a demigod.

而我是個半神。

Wow really!

哇，真的嗎？

Are we going to learn more about that?

我們是不是要多瞭解一下？

nope.

沒有。

Where's my donut!?

我的甜甜圈呢！？

Steve, we have to help these people!

史蒂夫，我們必須幫助這些人！

No we gotta go!

我們得走了！

I'm helping and you can't stop me!

我在幫忙，你不能阻止我!

The only way we can stop them is by crossing No Man's Land!

我們唯一能阻止他們的方法就是越過無人區!

That means no Man can cross it!

這意味著沒有人可以跨越它！

Good thing I aint no man.

好在我不是男人

Oh crap! A woman!

糟了！一個女人！

They found a loop hole!

他們發現了一個漏洞！

Shoot her! Shoot her!

殺了她！ 殺了她！

Should we shoot her exposed legs?

要不要拍下她裸露的雙腿？

No just keep shooting the shield!

不，只是繼續射擊盾牌！

Why didn't we name this "No Person's Land"?!

為什麼我們不把這裡命名為 "無人區"！？

It's not like she's gonna destroy them all

她又不是要把他們全滅了。

well alright then.

好吧，好吧，那麼。

Yay you saved us!

是你救了我們！

We almost died!

我們差點死了！

Do you know where the bad guys are headed?

你知道壞人要去哪裡嗎？

They're about to have a party!

他們要開派對了！

Alright, we'll just send Diana in.

好吧，我們就送戴安娜進去。

NOOOOO!

NOOOOO！

You must be sneaky!

你一定是偷偷摸摸的！

But she's like really powerful!

但她就像真的很強大！

Do you want this movie to be over in two seconds?

你想讓這部電影在兩秒內結束嗎？

Besides I haven't had my big reveal yet.

而且我還沒有大展拳腳呢。

What?

什麼？

Nothing! Be sneaky!

沒什麼！偷偷摸摸的！

Alright guys, we have to be sneaky.

好吧，夥計們，我們要偷偷摸摸的。

No Diana. You hear me?

沒有戴安娜。你聽到了嗎？

Don't worry. We'll watch her.

別擔心，我們會看著她。我們會看著她。

You watching her?

你在看她？

She just pulled a Batman

她剛剛拉了一個蝙蝠俠

Who's Batman?

誰是蝙蝠俠？

I would kill to have your dress.

我很想擁有你的衣服

What?

什麼？

I hope you are enjoying the bad guy party.

我希望你能喜歡這個壞蛋派對。

Ares!

阿瑞斯！

There you are.

你在這裡啊

Time to die!

是時候去死了！

I said no Diana!

我說了不要戴安娜！

This movie isn't called Wonder Steve!

這部電影不叫《神奇史蒂夫》！

out of my way!

閃開

Fire the gas!

開煤氣！

Uh oh! They're shooting at the town we just saved!

啊哦！他們在向我們剛剛拯救的小鎮射擊！

Hello? Anyone here?

有人在嗎？有人在嗎？

Boooo! You didn't save us!

Boooo!你沒有救我們！

We died!

我們死了！

That's it!

就是這樣！

Wasn't it funny when we gassed that defenseless town just now?

剛才我們向那個毫無防備的小鎮施放毒氣的時候，是不是很好笑？

I heard that!

我聽到了！

Uh oh!

啊哦！

Good thing I have these drugs!

好在我有這些藥！

Drugs are bad for your health!

藥物對健康有害!

I did it!

我做到了！

I killed Ares!

我殺了阿瑞斯！

You sure about that?

你確定嗎？

What?

什麼？

Who said that?

誰說的？

It's me!

是我！

Time for my big reveal!

我的大揭祕時間到了!

Ares!?

阿瑞斯！？

Were you surprised?

你很驚訝嗎？

NO!

不！

My god killing weapon!

我的神殺器！

That wasn't the god killing weapon.

那不是神殺器。

You are!

你是！

Whaaaaat?

什麼？

Wow. You didn't know that?

哇，你不知道嗎？你不知道嗎？

Your mother really must've not wanted you to succeed.

你媽媽一定是不希望你成功。

They're loading the gas into the plane!

他們在往飛機上裝汽油！

We have to stop it!

我們必須阻止它！

Has anyone seen Diana?

有人看到戴安娜了嗎？

Oh Diana! There you are!

哦，戴安娜！你在這裡啊！

Listen, Diana...

聽著，戴安娜...

I have to go be the hero now.

我現在要去做英雄了。

I'm tired of you stealing all the spotlight.

我已經厭倦了你搶走所有的聚光燈。

What are you saying?

你在說什麼？

You're so powerful!

你真厲害！

It kind of scares me a little!

這有點讓我害怕!

And you're honestly not that punctual!

而且你也不是那麼守時的!

You just kind of do your own thing all the time.

你只是一種做你自己的事情所有的時間。

Whatever it is, I can do it.

不管是什麼，我都能做到。

Take this!

拿著這個！

It'll help you keep better track of time!

它會幫助你更好地掌握時間!

Where are you going?

你要去哪裡？

You like my new armor?

你喜歡我的新盔甲嗎？

It suits you.

它適合你。

That's it!

就是這樣！

Only I get to make puns here!

只有我可以在這裡用雙關語！

You're grounded!

你被禁足了！

Oh look! it's your boyfriend!

哦，看，是你的男朋友！

Steve!

史蒂夫！

I have to blow up the plane!

我得把飛機炸掉！

I'm gonna need a rain check on that dance, Diana.

我需要改天再去看那支舞，戴安娜。

Don't do it!

不要這樣做！

I can save you!

我可以救你！

I can literally fly now!

我現在真的可以飛了！

It doesn't matter!

這不重要！

I'm gonna be in the sequel anyway.

反正我也會參加續集的。

Spoiler alert!

擾流器警報！

Fanny packs, here I come!

腰包，我來了！

A man named Steve sacrificing himself on a plane in a world war...

一個叫史蒂夫的人在世界大戰中在飛機上犧牲自己... ...

Now where have I seen that before?

我以前在哪裡見過？

Shut up!

閉嘴！

Ow!

嗷！

That's it! Lightning time!

就是這樣！閃電時間！

You're really trying to kill the daughter of Zeus with lightning?

你真的想用閃電殺死宙斯的女兒？

I'm not very smart.

我不是很聰明。

Thor called!

雷神叫了！

He wants his powers back!

他想要回他的力量！

What's with all the Marvel references!

怎麼會有這麼多的驚奇故事!

Wakanda Forever!

永遠的瓦坎達！

And with that... the war ended

就這樣... 戰爭結束了

And all of the Germans were suddenly friendly.

而所有的德國人都突然變得友好起來。

Remember two seconds ago when we were trying to kill eachother?

還記得兩秒鐘前，我們還想自相殘殺嗎？

Ya!

呀！

And peace was finally in hand.

而和平終於到手了。

Forever and ever.

永遠，永遠。

Well then why didn't you stop Hitler?

那你為什麼不阻止希特勒？

Ummmmmmm.

Ummmmmmm。