I'M YOUR HOST STEPHEN COLBERT, AND WE ARE LIVE.

我是你們的主持人Stephen COLBERT，我們正在直播。

WHERE'S THE THING?

那東西在哪裡？

DOES IT SAY LIVE ANYWHERE?

它說住在任何地方嗎？

LIVE FOLLOWING THE FINAL PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE OF 2020.

在2020年的最後一次總統辯論後直播。

TONIGHT WAS DONALD TRUMP'S VERY LAST CHANCE TO MAKE HIS CLOSING

今晚是唐納德-特朗普最後一次發表講話的機會。

ARGUMENT.

論點：

PLEASE IGNORE WHAT HE'S LIKE AND EVERYTHING HE'S EVER DONE.

請忽略他喜歡的東西和他所做過的一切。

AND TONIGHT I'LL TELL YOU IF HE PULLED IT OFF IN TONIGHT'S

今晚我會告訴你，如果他在今晚的節目中把它拉開了

BRAND-NEW LAST EVER SETTING THE 2020 PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE.

全新的最後一次設定2020年的總統辯論。

OLD MAN SLAP TWO.

OLD MAN SLAP TWO.

SLAP HARDER.LLED IT OFF IN THE PURSUIT TO MUTE!

為了靜音，用力拍打，把它拍掉！

>> BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

>>BLAH，BLAH，BLAH，BLAH。

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

BLAH，BLAH，BLAH，BLAH，BLAH，BLAH。

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

BLAH，BLAH，BLAH。

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

BLAH，BLAH，BLAH。

BLAH.

BLAH。

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

BLAH，BLAH，BLAH。

BLAH.

BLAH。

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. B BLAH, BLAH.

BLAH，BLAH，BLAH。B BLAH，BLAH。

( CRASHING SOUNDS ) BLAH, BLAH, BLAH BLAH BLAH.

（崩潰的聲音）BLAH，BLAH，BLAH BLAH BLAH。

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH BLAH BLAH -- ( CRASHING SOUNDS )

叭，叭，叭，叭，叭 -- （碰撞聲）

>> Stephen: HE'S FINE.

>> Stephen:他很好。

NOW, HAVING SEEN TONIGHT'S DEBATE, THERE ARE --

現在，看到了今晚的辯論，有 -

>> BLAH, BLAH, BLAH BLAH BLAH.

>> BLAH，BLAH，BLAH BLAH BLAH。

>> Stephen: NO!

>> Stephen:不！

BACK, BACK!

退後，退後！

( LAUGHTER ) IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO KEEP HIM OFF

（笑）這是不可能的，讓他關閉

THE FURNITURE.

傢俱：

TONIGHT HAD ITS UPS AND DOWNS, BUT THE HIGHLIGHT FOR ME WAS

今晚我的心情起起伏伏，但對我來說最重要的是

THAT WE'LL NEVER HAVE TO WATCH DONALD TRUMP DEBATE EVER AGAIN.

我們再也不用看唐納德・特朗普的辯論了。

COUNTING THE 2016 REPUBLICAN TONI

數說2016年的共和黨託尼

PRIMARY, WE'VE WATCHED HIM DO THAT 16 TIMES.

第一，我們已經看了他16次了。

IT'S EXCRUCIATING!

這是EXCRUCIATING！

IT'S LIKE DENTAL SURGERY AND TONIGHT WAS LIKE GETTING OUR

這就像牙科手術，今晚就像得到我們的。

LAST WISDOM TOOTH TAKEN OUT.

最後的智慧牙齒被拔掉了。

YES, IT HURT.

是的，它的傷害。

AND YES WE CAN STILL TASTE THE BLOOD IN OUR MOUTHS.

是的，我們仍然可以嚐到我們口中的血腥味。

THIS IS ALSO THE LAST CHANCE FOR TRUMP TO BE SEEN BY MILLIONS OF

這也是特朗普最後一次被數百萬人看到的機會。

EYEBALLS FOR FREE, AND THAT'S IMPORTANT, BECAUSE HE'S HURTING

眼球是免費的，這很重要，因為他受傷了。

FOR CASH.

為現金。

IT'S DRYING UP.

它的乾涸。

IN RECENT WEEKS, HIS CAMPAIGN HAS PULLED MILLIONS OF DOLLARS

近幾周來，他的競選活動已經獲得了幾百萬美元的收入

IN PLANNED TELEVISION ADS AIMED AT VOTERS IN MIDWESTERN STATES

計劃中的針對美國中西部各州選民的電視廣告數量

INCLUDING MICHIGAN, WISCONSIN, MINNESOTA, OHIO, AND IOWA.

包括密歇根州、威斯康星州、明尼蘇達州、俄亥俄州和愛荷華州。

AFTER TONIGHT, HIS BEST HOPE FOR FREE ADVERTISING IS STANDING ON

今晚之後，他的免費廣告的最大希望是站在。

A STREET CORNER WITH ONE OF THOSE FLIPPY ARROWS.

一個帶著這些飛舞的箭頭的街角。

AND LEAD UP TO THE DEBATE, THE PRESIDENT'S ADVISORS PLEADED

在辯論之前，總統的顧問們懇求： 1.

WITH HIM TO BE SOFTER.

和他在一起要更柔軟。

SOFT HE CAN.

柔和的他可以。

DO I'VE SEEN THE MAN IN TENNIS SHORTS.

我見過那個穿網球短褲的人嗎？

BUT DID IT HELP?

但它有幫助嗎？

TONIGHT'S MODERATOR KRISTEN WELKER DID A GREAT JOB.

今晚的主持人KRISTEN WELKER做得很好。

SHE STARTED BY REMINDING EVERYONE OF THE RULES.

她先是提醒大家注意規則。

>> AT THE BEGINNING OF EACH SECTION, EACH CANDIDATE WILL

>> 在每一節開始，每位候選人將：

HAVE TWO MINUTES UNINTERRUPTED TO ANSWER MY FIRST QUESTION.

有兩分鐘的時間來回答我的第一個問題。

THE DEBATE COMMISSION WILL THEN TURN ON THEIR MICROPHONE ONLY

辯論委員會隨後將只打開他們的微型電話。

WHEN IT IS THEIR TURN TO ANSWER.

當輪到他們回答時，

AND THE COMMISSION WILL TURN IT OFF EXACTLY WHEN THE TWO MINUTES

而委員會會在兩分鐘後將其關閉

HAVE EXPIRED.

已過期。

ON BEHALF OF THE VOTERS, I'M GOING TO ASK YOU TO PLEASE SPEAK

我代表投票人，請你們發言。

ONE AT A TIME -- >> Stephen: OKAY.

一次一個 -- >> Stephen:好的

WHY ARE WE PRETENDING THIS IS

為什麼我們認為這是

FOR BOTH OF THEM?

為了他們兩個？

THE RULE ONLY APPLIES TO ONE GUY.

這條規則只適用於一個人。

THIS IS LIKE MAYOR McCHEESE HOLDING A TOWN HALL AND STARTING

這就好比市長麥基斯召開市政廳，並開始了

OUTBY SAYING, REMEMBER, NOBODY BURGLE ANY HAMBURGERS, PLEASE.

說出來，記住，沒有人漢堡任何漢堡，請。

SHE KEPT THEM ON SUBJECT, ADMIRABLY.

她讓他們回到主題上，坦然面對。

THE FIRST SUBJECT WAS TRUMP'S CATASTROPHIC COVID RESPONSE,

第一個主題是特朗普的災難性迴應。

WHICH, OF COURSE, WAS A SUBJECT HE DIDN'T WANT TO TOUCH, WHICH

其中，當然，是一個主題 他不想去碰，其中

IS WHY, EARLIER THIS WEEK, HIS CAMPAIGN MANAGER SENT A LETTER

是為什麼，本週早些時候，他的競選經理髮了一封信。

TO THE DEBATE COMMISSION COMPLAINING ABOUT THE TOPICS FOR

向辯論委員會提出申訴的主題的報告

NOT BEING FOCUSED MORE ON FOREIGN POLICY.

沒有把更多的注意力放在外交政策上。

OH, I HAVE A NON-COVID QUESTION ON FOREIGN POLICY -- HOW COME

哦，我有一個關於外交政策的非公開問題 -- -- 怎麼來了？

OTHER COUNTRIES WON'T LET US GO THERE ANYMORE?

其他國家不會再讓我們去那裡了？

TRUMP SAYS THAT WE'RE GOING TO GET A VACCINE AND HE'LL GIVE IT

特朗普說，我們將得到一種疫苗，他會給它。

TO EVERYONE FASTER THAN ANY EXPERTS HAVE PREDICTED.

給大家的速度比任何專家預測的都要快。

>> I THINK MY TIMELINE IS GOING TO BE MORE ACCURATE.

>> 我想我的時間線會更準確。

I DON'T KNOW THAT THEY'RE COUNTING ON THE MILITARY THE WAY

我不知道他們是怎麼算計軍方的

THAT I DO, BUT WE HAVE OUR GENERALS LINED UP, ONE IN

我是這麼想的，但我們的將軍們已經排好了隊，一個個... ...

PARTICULAR THAT'S THE HEAD OF LOGISTICS --

特別是那是物流部的負責人 -- --

>> Stephen: THAT'S ONE PARTICULAR GENERAL, HE'S VERY

>> 史蒂芬：那是一個特殊的將軍，他非常。

GOOD AT LOGISTICS.

善於物流。

ALSO, GREAT AT CAR INSURANCE,ER AND HE KNOWS SHAQ, WHO I WILL

另外，擅長汽車保險，ER和他知道沙克，誰我會

HAVE -- AND YES I DIDN'T MAKE A MISTAKE -- I DON'T KNOW MAKE A

有 - 是的，我沒有犯錯誤 - 我不知道做一個。

MISTAKE.

錯誤。

IT'S A LIVE SHOW.

這是一個現場表演。

HOW COULD I MAKE A MISTAKE?

我怎麼會犯錯誤呢？

WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS SHAQ, A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE, WILL DROP

我想說的是沙克，我的一個好朋友，會放棄的

THE VACCINE INTO YOUR VEINS.

疫苗進入你的靜脈。

BUT WHAT I MEANT TO SAY -- WE'RE LIVE, RIGHT.

但我想說的是 -- 我們還活著，對吧。

>> YES.

>> 是。

>> Stephen: THE PRESIDENT HAD NUMBERS EVEN IF THEY DIDN'T MAKE

>> 斯蒂芬：總統有數字，即使他們沒有做。

SENSE.

感。

>> 99.9 OF YOUNG PEOPLE RECOVER.

>> 99.9的年輕人恢復。

>> Stephen: WHY DO YOU KEEP BRAGGING ABOUT HOW YOUNG PEOPLE

>> Stephen:你為什麼一直在吹噓年輕人如何？

ARE SAFE?

是安全的？

YOU KNOW OLD PEOPLE THERE THE ONES THAT VOTE, RIGHT?

你知道老人們在那裡是有投票權的，對嗎？

GRANNY, I NEED YOU TO VOTE FOR ME LIKE IT'S THE LAST THING YOU

奶奶，我需要你投給我，就像這是你最後一次投給我一樣。

WILL EVER DO, WHICH, FUN FACT, IT MIGHT BE.

將永遠做，其中，有趣的事實，它可能是。

TRUMP SAID A LOT OF LIES TONIGHT INCLUDING ABOUT THE CITY I'M IN

特朗普今晚說了很多謊話 包括我所在城市的事

RIGHT NOW.

現在。

>> IF YOU GO AND LOOK AT WHAT'S HAPPENED TO NEW YORK, IT'S A

>> 如果你去看看發生在紐約的事情，這是一個。

GHOST TOWN.

幽靈鎮：

IT'S A GHOST TOWN.

這是一個鬼城。

>> Stephen: MR. PRESIDENT, WHEN YOU COME TO NEW YORK, THOSE

>> Stephen:先生。主席，當你來紐約時，這些... ...

AREN'T GHOSTS ON THE STREET, THOSE ARE PEOPLE BOOOOOOING YOU!

這不是街上的鬼魂，那是人們對你的噓噓！

TRUMP TALKED ABOUT THE NUMBER ONE SCOURGE OF THE PANDEMIC,

特朗普談到了潘多拉病的頭號禍害。

DINING RESTRICTIONS.

就餐限制。

>> WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT PEOPL PLEXIGLASS, THESE ARE

>> 當你說到人的複雜性時，這些都是......。

RESTAURANTS THAT ARE DYING.

正在消亡的餐廳。

PUTTING UP PLEXIGLASS IS UNBELIEVABLY EXPENSIVE.

安裝PLEXIGLASS的費用高得令人難以置信。

YOU'RE GOING TO SIT THERE IN A CUBICLE WRAPPED AROUND IN

你要坐在那裡的一個立方體裡，圍在一起。

PLASTIC.

塑膠：

>> Stephen: TRUMP DOESN'T WANT TO BE WRAPPED IN PLASTIC.

>> 斯蒂芬：特朗普不想被包在塑膠袋裡。

IT KILLS A FEELING AND FIT BREAKS YOU WIND UP WITH AN ERIC.

它殺死了一種感覺，並適合打破你風與埃裡克。

THE SUBJECT TURNED TO FOREIGN ELECTION INTERFERENCE.

議題轉向外國干涉選舉。

AND WHEN BIDEN ANSWERED HE CHOSE HIS WORDS CAREFULLY.

而當BIDEN回答時，他謹慎地選擇了他的話語。

>> WE ARE IN A SITUATION WHERE WE HAVE FOREIGN COMPANIES --

>> 我們現在的情況是，我們有外國公司 -- --

COUNTRIES TRYING TO INTERFERE IN THE OUTCOME OF OUR ELECTION.

試圖干涉我們選舉結果的國家。

HIS OWN NATIONAL SECURITY ADVISOR TOLD THEM THAT WHAT IS

他自己的國家安全顧問告訴他們，什麼是國家安全？

HAPPENING WITH HIS BUDDY -- WELL, I SHOULDN'T -- WELL, I

發生與他的朋友 - 好吧，我不應該 - 好吧，我。

WILL -- HIS BUDDY, RUDY GIULIANI >> Stephen: INCIDENTALLY, I

WILL -- 他的朋友 RUDY GIULIANI >> Stephen:偶然地，我

SHOULDN'T -- I WILL -- IS ALSO WHAT RUDY SAID TO HIMSELF IN

不應該... 我會... 也是RUDIDY對自己說的話，在

THAT HOTEL ROOM.

那個酒店的房間。

REGARDING PERSONAL TAXES, BIDEN DISTINGUISHED HIMSELF FROM

關於個人所得稅，比登脫離了自己的身份。

TRUMP.

特朗普：

>> I RELEASED ALL OF MY TAX RETURNS, 22 YEARS, GO LOOK ATSA

>> 我公佈了我所有的退稅單，22年了，去看看ATSA吧

THEM.

他們。

>> Stephen: MAYBE LATER.

>> Stephen:也許會晚一些。

I MEAN, I HATE WATCHING TRUMP, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO READ TWO

我的意思是，我討厭看特朗普，但還沒到能讀兩本的程度

DECADES OF ITEMIZED AMTRAK TICKETS.

幾十年來，項目化的AMTRAK車票。

WHEN TRUMP TRIED TO PAINT BIDEN AS CORRUPT THE B.P. HIT BACK.

當特朗普試圖把比登描繪成腐敗的時候，B.P.進行了反擊。

>> RELEASE YOUR TAX RETURN AND TALK ABOUT CORRUPTION.

>> 公佈你的納稅申報，談談腐敗問題。

>> Stephen: YOU JUST GOT AUDIT, JACK!

>> Stephen:你剛剛得到審計，傑克！

PUT THAT IN YOUR W2 AND DEDUCT IT!

把它寫進你的W2，然後扣掉它！

COME ON!

來吧！

( LAUGHTER ) PUT THALSO SAID -- OH, BOY.

（笑）莆田也說 - 哦，男孩。

TRUMP ALSO SAID THAT THE INFORMATION ABOUT HIS TAX

特朗普還說，關於他的稅款資訊

RETURNS WAS MISLEADING.

返回是誤導。

>> I PRE-PAID MY TAX.

>> 我預付了我的稅款。

TENS -- OVER THE LAST NUMBER OF YEARS, TENS OF MILLIONS OF

在過去的幾年裡，數以千萬計的人都在為自己的利益而努力。

DOLLARS I PRE-PAID.

我預付的美元。

>> Stephen: I ALSO PRE-PAID STORMY DANIELS TO SHUT UP MONTHS

>> Stephen:我也預付STORMY DANIELS閉嘴的幾個月。

BEFORE SHE SPANKED ME.

在她打我屁股之前

IT'S AN INSTALLMENT PLAN.

這是一個安裝計劃。

TRUMP TRIED TO DEFEND HIS PERSONAL FINANCES.

特朗普試圖為他的個人融資辯護。

>> I HAVE MANY BANK ACCOUNTS AND THEY'RE ALL LISTED AND THEY'RE

>> 我有很多銀行賬戶，它們都在名單上，而且它們是

ALL OVER THE PLACE.

到處都是。

I MEAN, I WAS A BUSINESS MAN DOING BUSINESS.

我是說，我是一個做生意的人，做的是生意。

>> Stephen: TRUMP SOUNDS LIKE THREE KIDS STACKED IN A TRENCH

>> 史蒂芬: 特朗普的聲音就像三個孩子被關在櫃子裡一樣。

COAT PRETENDING TO BE AN ADULT.

大衣假裝是成年人。

I'M LIKE A BUSINESS MAN DOING BUSINESS.

我就像一個做生意的人在做生意。

I LOVE OFFICE AND EAT TAXES WITH MY COFFEE.

我喜歡辦公室，喝著咖啡吃著稅。

THREE TICKETS FOR THE BOOBIE MOVIE, PLEASE.

三張電影票，請。

AND IN RESPONSE TO TRUMP'S ATTACKS ON BIDEN'S FAMILY, IT

而對於特朗普對比登家人的攻擊，它：

FINALLY HAPPENED.

終於發生了。

>> THERE'S A REASON WHY HE'S BRINGING UP ALL THIS MALARKEY.

>> 他之所以提出這些馬拉基，是有原因的。

>> Stephen: BOOM!

>> Stephen:轟！

THE FIRST MALARKEY OF THE NIGHT!

今晚的第一隻馬拉基！

HOLD ON, LET'S JUST CHECK MY PUNCH CARD HERE.

等一下，讓我們只是檢查我的PUNCH卡在這裡。

I'VE GOT THE FREQUENT MALARKEY CARD RIGHT THERE.

我已經得到了經常馬拉基卡就在那裡。

THAT'S NUMBER ONE.

這是第一條。

FIVE MORE.

五更。

AND I GET A FREE SUB.

我得到一個免費的潛艇。

BIDEN UNVEILED SOME BIG NEWS ABOUT HEALTHCARE.

BIDEN公佈了一些關於衛生保健的重大消息。

>> WHAT I'M GOING TO DO IS PASS ObamaCare WITH A PUBLIC OPTION

>> 我要做的是通過奧巴馬醫保的公共選擇。

AND BECOME BIDENCARE.

併成為比登科。

>> Stephen: YES, BIDENCARE, JUST LIKE ObamaCare, BUT I'M

>> 史蒂芬：是的，BIDENCARE，就像奧巴馬醫保，但我。

GOING TO GUESS WAY BETTERe DENTAL.

去猜測更好的方式e牙科。

WELKER ASKED TRUMP WHAT HE WANTED TO HAVE TO REPLACE

WELKER問特朗普想用什麼來代替？

ObamaCare, AND HERE WAS HIS ANSWER.

奧巴馬醫保，這是他的回答。

>> SO I'D LIKE TO TERMINATE ObamaCare, COME UP WITH A

>> 所以，我想終止奧巴馬醫保，想出一個。

BRAND-NEW BEAUTIFUL HEALTHCARE.

全新的美麗保健。

>> Stephen: HOLD ON, HOLD ON.

>> Stephen:堅持下去，堅持下去。

THE DETAILS -- BEAUTIFUL, HEALTHCARE, AND THAT'S ALL,

細節 -- 美麗的，健康的，這就是全部。

BRAND-NE OKAY, THANK YOU.

好吧，謝謝你。

TRUMP TRIED TO CALL BIDEN'S BLUE-COLLAR ROOTS IN SCRANTON,

特朗普試圖在斯克蘭頓給比登的藍領根基打電話。

PENNSYLVANIA INTO QUESTION.

賓夕法尼亞州的問題：

>> HE DOESN'T COME FROM SCRANTON.

>> 他不是從斯蘭頓來的。

>> Stephen: DID HE JUST SHOW ME THE LONG FORM BIRTH

>> 史蒂芬：他是不是給我看了長表的出生。

CERTIFICATE JOE BIDEN?

證書喬比登？

WHERE DO YOU THINK HE'S FROM, NAIROBI'S BIG IRISH CATHOLIC

你覺得他從哪裡來，奈洛比的愛爾蘭大教派？

NEIGHBORHOOD?

鄰里關係？

THEN TURNED TO THE TRAGEDY OF THE CHILDREN TRUMP T TRUMP

然後轉向了孩子們的悲劇 特朗普 T 特朗普

ADMINISTRATION TOOK FROM THE PARENTS AT THE SOUTHERN BORDER.

管理部門從南邊界的家長那裡得到了。

>> THE UNITED STATES CAN'T LOCATE THE PARENTS OF MORE THAN

>> 美國無法確定超過10人的父母的位置

500 CHILDREN.

500名兒童；

HOW WILL THEY BE REUNITED.

他們將如何重逢。

>> WE'RE WORKING ON IT.

>> 我們正在努力。

WE'RE TRYING VERY HARD.

我們正在努力。

>> Stephen: WELL DONE, MR. PRESIDENT.

>> Stephen:幹得好，先生。主席：

YOU MANAGED TO SUMMON ALL URGENCY AND RESOLVE OF A GUY

你設法總結所有的緊急和決議的一個傢伙。

LOOKING UNDER THE COUCH FOR THE TV REMOTE.

在椅子下面找電視遙控器。

TRUMP THEN DID AN INSANE THING AND TRIED TO DEFEND THE BORDER

特朗普就做了一件瘋狂的事，試圖保衛邊界。

DETENTION CENTERS FOR KIDS.

兒童拘留所；

>> THEY ARE SO WELL TAKEN CARE OF, THEY'RE IN FACILITIES THAT

>> 他們得到了很好的照顧，他們在設施中，。

WERE SO CLEAN -- >> Stephen: YES, THEY STOLE

他們很乾淨 -- >> 史蒂芬：是的，他們偷了。

THE CHILDREN, BUT THE WAREHOUSE THEY STORE THEM IN IS SO CLEAN

孩子們，但他們存放孩子的倉庫很乾淨。

YOU COULD EAT OFF THE FLOOR, WHICH THEY DO, 'CAUSE THERE'S NO

你可以在地板上吃東西，他們就是這樣做的，因為這裡沒有。

FURNITURE.

傢俱：

TRUMP SEEMED TO GET SPOOKED AS THE NIGHT WENT ON, AND STARTED

特朗普似乎得到了驚嚇，因為晚上繼續，並開始。

PLAYING SOME OF THE CLASSICS, LIKE IMMIGRANTS ARE SCARY.

玩一些經典的，像移民是可怕的。

>> CATCH AND RELEASE IS A DISASTER.

>> 捕捉和釋放是一個災難。

A MURDERER WOULD COME IN, A RAPIST WOULD COME IN, A VERY BAD

凶手會進來，強姦犯會進來，一個非常糟糕的。

PERSON WOULD COME IN -- >> Stephen: UH-HUH, IMMIGRANTS

人會進來 -- >> Stephen:UH-HUH, IMMIGRANTS(移民)

ARE MURDERERS AND RAPISTS.

是殺人犯和強姦犯。

THTRUMP'S CLOSING WITH THE LINE OPENED THE ENTIRE NIGHTMARE WITH

THTRUMP與線的閉幕，開啟了整個夜晚與。

IT.

IT：

JIM, LET'S COMPLETE THE ENTIRE CIRCLE.

吉姆，讓我們把整個圈子都走完。

GOODBYE SIR?

再見，先生？

SEE YOU AT THE TRIBUNALS!

我們在三聯展上見!

TRUMP MADE AN AUDACIOUS CLAIM ABILITY HIS TRACK RECORD ON

特朗普提出了一個聽起來很有能力的說法，他的業績記錄在

RACE.

種族：

>> I AM THE LEAST RACIST PERSON.

>> 我是最沒有種族歧視的人。

I CAN'T EVEN SEE THE AUDIENCE BECAUSE IT'S SO DARK.

我甚至看不到觀眾，因為太黑了。

>> Stephen: THERE ARE ALL KINDS OF BLACK PEOPLE ANDD

>> 斯蒂芬：有各種各樣的黑人和D。

MEXICANS HIDING OUT THERE IN THE DARK COULD BE, I DON'T KNOW,

墨西哥人躲在黑暗中，可能是，我不知道。

PLOTTING AND PLANNING AND WAITING TO POUNCE AND I WOULDN'T

策劃和計劃，並等待撲滅，我不會

EVEN KNOW BECAUSE I'M SO NOT RACIST.

甚至知道，因為我不是種族主義者。

THEN BIDEN GAVE AN IMPASSIONED CLOSING ARGUMENT.

然後，比登發表了熱情洋溢的結束語。

>> I REPRESENT ALL OF YOUNNING A WHETHER YOU VOTED FOR ME OR

>> 我代表全體永寧人，無論你是投我的票還是投我的票。

AGAINST ME AND I'M GOING TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE REPRESENTED.

反對我，我會確保你的代表權。

I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU HOPE, WE'RE GOING TO MOVE, CHOOSE

我要給你希望，我們要移動，選擇。

SCIENCE OVER FICTION.

科學勝過小說。

>> Stephen: SCIENCE OVER

>> 史蒂芬: 科學至上

FIGURES, EGGS OVER EASIY.

圖，雞蛋過EASIY。

MOONS OVER MY HAMMY!E ROOTY TOOTY!

我的漢米上的月亮!

RICH AND FRUITY!

豐富而多汁!

THAT'S I-HOP, RIGHT?

這就是I-HOP，對吧？

THAT'S A HUGE INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT.

這是一個巨大的國際事件。

OF COURSE, THE BIG QUESTION, WHO WON THE DEBATE.

當然，最大的問題是，誰贏得了辯論。

DR. JILL BIDEN WITH AN AMAZING MATCHING MASK DRESS ENSEMBLE.

JILL BIDEN博士與一個匹配的面具禮服ENSEMBLE。

I'M A SUCKER FOR FLORAL PLINTS OR ANY KIND OF COORDINATED PLAN.

我是一個吸吮者的花線或任何形式的協調計劃。

AND THAT'S THAT.

就是這樣。

THE FINALUPLE DEBATE.

最後的辯論。

AND AMERICANS HAVE A TOUGH CHOICE TO MAKE NOW.

而美國人現在要做出艱難的選擇。

DO THEY VOTE FOR JOE BIDEN ON NOVEMBER 3?

他們會在11月3日投票給喬-比登嗎？

OR DO THEY VOTE FOR HIM EARLY BECAUSE THE ULTIMATE MUTE BUTTON

還是他們早早地就投給他，因為終極靜音按鈕。

IS IN YOUR HANDS.

是在你的手中。

>> BLAH, BLAH BLAH BLAH.

>>BLAH，BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH。

>> Stephen: NO, GO AWAY!

>> Stephen:不，走開！

GET BACK!CA WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU

回來！CA我們為你準備了一場精彩的演出。

TONIGHT.

今晚。