S: So we are here in Kurume Ramen Sei Yo Ken

S：所以我們在這裡的久留米拉麵世友會。

S: We have travelled out of Tokyo all the way down to Fukuoka, and then we went from Fukuoka to Kurume

S:我們從東京一路走到福岡，然後從福岡到久留米。

S: So we are having Tonkotsu Ramen today.

S：所以我們今天吃的是冬瓜拉麵。

M: This place is beyond legit. It started in 1952.

M：這個地方是超越合法的。它始於1952年。

M: Someone started a street stall, and they started this original kind of Ramen.

男：有人在街邊擺攤，就開始了這種原生態的拉麵。

M: They have this recipe that's been passed on forever, S: Uh-huh, yeah M: it's older than us.

M：他們有這個祕方，一直流傳下來，S：嗯哼，是啊M：比我們還老。

M: I feel like this is the first official real Japanese Ramen video we're putting out there, aren't we?

M：我感覺這是我們官方推出的第一個真正的日本拉麵視頻，不是嗎？

S: We have been in Japan for a year now, and we didn't want to rush a Ramen kind of video... but here comes the ramen!

S:我們已經在日本一年了， 我們不想匆匆忙忙的拉麵樣的視頻... 但這裡的拉麵！

M: Simon's like, "I don't want to rush it!" (sheep noise?)

M：西蒙說："我不想著急！"（羊的聲音？

(waiter talking, S&M thanking)

（服務員說話，S&M感謝）

(porn-like Oooing and Ahhhing noises)

(類似色情的嗚嗚聲和啊哈聲)

(rewinding tape noise)

（倒帶噪音）

(dramatic music)

咍

(music gets funky B) )

(音樂變得時髦B) )

M: So we ordered their two special Ramens on the menu.

M：於是我們點了他們菜單上的兩道特色雷門。

M: This one here is one that's actually richer, so they use kinda like the pork fat from the back,

男：這裡的這個是一個其實比較豐富的，所以他們用的還挺像後面的豬油。

(S: uh-huh)

(S: uh-huh)

M: and they boil it down and then they add it into it to make it like, much creamier.

M：他們把它煮熟了，然後他們把它加進去，使它像，更奶油。

M: ...and Simon has the one that doesn't have that in it, so it's not as rich.

M：......而Simon有一個沒有這個東西在裡面，所以它沒有那麼豐富。

S: Okay, so here's the deal

S:好吧，所以這裡的交易

(M: obviously gonna share)

(M：顯然會分享)

S: ...we have to start eating this right away because Ramen has a very fast time limit,

S：......我們必須馬上開始吃這個，因為拉麵的時間限制非常快。

S: it starts going soggy if you talk for too long, so let's just eat this and show you what it's about.

S：說的時間長了就開始溼漉漉的了，所以我們就吃這個，讓你看看是怎麼回事。

M: The noodles get all bloated and everything.

男：麵條吃多了就會脹，什麼都有。

S: Okay. Don't be grossed out, but the pork bone that we're actually eating is pork skull.

S:S: Okay.別噁心了，其實我們吃的豬骨是豬頭骨。

S: So in their - M: [we're] not eating the skull, but...

S：所以在他們的--M：[我們]不是吃頭骨，而是... ...

S: In their vat of broth is just water, and the skull of a pig. (M: mmm-hmm)

S：在他們的肉湯大桶裡只有水，還有豬頭骨。(M: Mmm-hmm)

S: ...and they left in the brain and they left in the eyes, because it gives a sweetness to the broth,

S：......他們留在了大腦裡，留在了眼睛裡，因為它給肉湯帶來了甜味。

S: and that's all the seasoning that you have!

S：你的調料就這麼多!

M: How amazing is the restaurant, they have a little basket with hair elastics!

男：餐廳多神奇啊，他們有一個小籃子，裡面有髮膠!

S: Hey, you know that a girl is serious if she looks in the eyes, puts her hair back in a ponytail, and starts slurping down some wet noodles.

S：嘿，如果一個女孩看在眼裡，把頭髮紮成馬尾辮，然後開始啜飲一些溼麵條，你就知道她是認真的。

M: Yeah.

M：是的。

S: You know what I'm talkin' 'bout.

你知道我在說什麼。

S: I'm only talking about Ramen, get your head out of the gutter.

S：我只是在說拉麵，把你的腦袋從陰溝里弄出來。

S: Let's start! (Itadakimasu) M: Itadakimasu!

S:開始吧！(Itadakimasu) M：Itadakimasu!

M: OOoh I can see little pieces of the pork fat floating 'round in here!

M：哦，我可以看到豬油的小塊在這裡漂浮著!

S: Aaaaaahh yeahh.

S:Aaaaaahh yeahh。

(S: (slurping)) M: Ohhh my god!

(S：(嘖嘖))男：哦，我的天啊!

S: Lemme try. M: Oh my god.

S:讓我試試。M：哦，我的上帝。

M: ...this is like... S: I don't have any in mine! M: That's because you didn't get the rich one. Try this, ready?

M：......這就像......。S：我的裡面沒有啊!M：那是因為你沒有得到豐富的。試試這個，準備好了嗎？

S: Those are like, little, fried bits... M: Little tiny fried bits of like, pork rind magic.

S:這些都是像，小，油炸位... ...M: 小小的油炸塊，就像，豬皮的魔法。

S: Ehyooo... M: Right?

S:Ehyooo...M：對吧？

S: That tastes like pork rinds. M: It is pork rinds!

S:這味道像豬皮。M：這就是豬皮!

S: It's just pork rinds in the soup. (M: It is pork rinds.)

S：就是湯裡的豬皮。(M：是豬皮。)

(M: Oh my god) S: It's so... ri- I don't know how to explain this flavor, because I don't really have broths like this back in North America.

(M: Oh my god) S: It's so... ri- I don't know how to explain this flavor, 我不知道該怎麼解釋這種味道，因為我在北美沒有這樣的肉湯。

S: It's creamy, and rich, but it's not like, milk creamy. (M: mmhmm.)

S：是奶油味的，很濃郁，但又不像，牛奶的奶油味。(M: mmhmm.)

S: The closest equivalent is like a cream of mushroom soup. That's the... that's the only taste that I remember, that... that this is kind of like. M: (continuous yummy noises)

S:最接近的等價物 就像一個奶油蘑菇湯。這是... ... 這是唯一的味道，我記得，這... ... 這是一種像。 M: (連續的好吃的聲音)

M: Well, the key with this kind of soup is the collagen.

M：嗯，這種湯的關鍵在於膠原蛋白。

M: So this particular shop boils it, for like, three days, until everything has broken down.

M：所以這個特別的店家就把它煮了，三天一樣，直到一切都壞了。

M: It's actually pretty healthy for you, technically.

M：其實從技術上講，這對你來說是很健康的。

M: All those nutritions, and then carbs and noodles.

男：所有這些營養品，然後是碳水化合物和麵條。

S: Can you say it's pretty healthy with all those S&M: Carbs and noodles?

S:你可以說這是相當健康的 與所有這些S＆M： 碳水化合物和麵條？

S: I gotta say I'm really embarrassed, when it comes to eating Ramen noodles, because I don't know how to do it right.

S：我得說我真的很尷尬，說到吃拉麵，因為我不知道怎麼做才對。

S: All of my friends, they can just put a bunch in their mouth, slurp it down-

S:我所有的朋友， 他們可以只是把一束 在他們的嘴裡， 嘖嘖下來，

S: And the whole point of slurping is that you don't want to wait for it to cool down, so you're breathing in so that it cools it down.

S:你不想等它冷卻下來， 所以你呼吸，使它冷卻下來。

S: ...but I just keep on choking on my noodles

S：......但我一直在吃麵條時被嗆到了

M: You really can't do it? S: Mm-mm.

M：你真的做不到？S：嗯嗯。

M: Okay watch. Take it like this, I grab it with my teeth, and I pull the noodles up the bottom, while I catch it in my teeth doing this: (sucks in at through teeth) ...like that.

男：好的看。像這樣拿著，我用牙齒抓住它，然後我把麵條拉到底部，同時我用牙齒接住它，這樣做。(用牙齒吸)... ...像這樣.

S: Okay, show me. M: Okay. Ready? Watch.

S:好吧，給我看看。M：好的。準備好了嗎？看好了

(romantic tune overlaying Martina slurping grossly)

(浪漫的曲調疊加瑪蒂娜的粗口)

(S&M mm-hmm'ing)

(S&M mm-hmm'ing)

M: No? S: Mmmmm-hmmm. (sarcastically)

M：沒有？S：嗯嗯嗯。(諷刺地)

M: Why're you making a face like that? S: No!

M：你幹嘛做這樣的表情?S：沒有!

M: ...and what has to be one of our all time favorite additions is a' the hanjku tamago.

M：......還有就是我們一直以來最喜歡的加餐之一就是 "韓屋玉子"。

M: A perfectly soft boiled-ish egg (music in background: Handel's 'Hallelujah Chorus')

男：一個煮得很軟的雞蛋（背景音樂：亨德爾的《哈利路亞大合唱》）。

M: with...I don't know how they make this magical center look like this.

M：用......我不知道他們是怎麼把這個魔法中心弄成這樣的。

S: Ramen eggs make me so happy.

S:拉麵雞蛋讓我很高興。

M: Now, one of the things about Ramen that's so amazing it that it really changes according to where you are.

M：現在，關於拉麵的一件事是如此神奇，它真的會根據你所在的地方而改變。

M: So Tokyo noodles are different, than noodles that you might found[find] like out in Fukuoka, versus Kyoto.

M: 所以，東京的麵條和你在福岡、京都等地找到的麵條是不同的。

S: (slurping)

S：（嘖嘖）。

M: The noodles here are cut really, really thin, (S: slurping continuously)

男：這裡的麵條切得很細很細，（S：不斷地嘖嘖稱奇）。

M: ...and supposedly, that's because originally it started by a bunch of guys that were down by the docks that were fishermen, wanting to eat their stuff quickly.

M：......據說，那是因為最初是由一群在碼頭邊打漁的人開始的，他們想快點吃到自己的東西。

M: ...and so if you have a thick noodle it's difficult to eat, but if they're thin, you can just kinda shovel that down. S: (slurping loudly)

M：......所以如果你的麵條很粗，就很難吃，但如果麵條很細，你就可以挺著肚子把它剷下去。S：（大聲地啜飲）。

S: So that's apparently where the thin, straight cut noodles came from here.

S：所以這顯然是這裡的細直切面的來歷。

M: This is actually my style of noodle when it comes to Ramen. This is what I prefer.

M：其實說到拉麵，這是我的風格。這是我比較喜歡的。

S: ...and everybody has a different preference when it comes to Ramen.

S：......而每個人對拉麵的喜好都不一樣。

S: A lot of our Japanese friends aren't that fond of Tonkotsu Ramen, they prefer something like a Shio or a Shoyu

S:很多日本朋友並不喜歡豚骨拉麵 他們更喜歡Shio或Shoyu之類的東西。

S: ...because they fine Tonkotsu Ramen too rich and too thick.

S：......因為他們精細的冬瓜拉麵太濃太厚了。

S: ...and I think they're crazy because this is just insanely delicious. M: (mm's in agreement)

S：......我覺得他們瘋了，因為這實在是太好吃了。M: (mm's in agreement)

S: The... the other kinds of ramen that I had like Shio or Shoyu are... all right.... but I always prefer Tonkotsu.

S:其他種類的拉麵，我有像Shio或Shoyu是... ... 好吧....，但我總是喜歡Tonkotsu。

S: ...and supposedly, according to my Japanese friends, most Westerners prefer Tonkotsu.

S：......據說，據我的日本朋友說，大多數西方人更喜歡Tonkotsu。

M: ...and we've had Tonkotsu Ramen before in Tokyo. I found it really heavy, and oily,

M：......我們以前在東京吃過冬瓜拉麵。我發現它真的很重，而且油膩。

S: Yes!

S：是的!

M: So when I ate it... it was like eating fat gob-lets on top. (S: slurping in agreement)

M：所以我吃的時候......就像在上面吃胖胖的小球。(S：嘖嘖地表示同意)

M: It always made my stomach feel a bit ill.

男：它總讓我的胃有點不舒服。

S: (noises of agreement) M: This is very different.

S:(同意的聲音) M: 這是非常不同的。

M: This almost tastes like a chicken soup.

男：這幾乎是雞湯的味道。

M: Like that kind of homemade chicken flavor. It doesn't have a heavy, greasy taste whatsoever.

男：喜歡那種家常雞的味道。一點也沒有重口味，油膩的味道。

M: Simon's about to chow down on what looks like some kind of noodle or meat, but it is not, it is actually a bamboo shoot.

男：西門正準備大口吃東西，看起來像是某種麵條或肉，但其實不是，它其實是竹筍。

M: This is Menma. S: I love Menma. Martina's not fond of it, so she doesn't have that much in her's.

M：這就是孟婆。S：我喜歡門瑪。瑪蒂娜不喜歡，所以她的沒有那麼多。

M: It depends on the location! So, some places I find the Menma is quite over powering, because it's usually like a fermented one,

M：這要看地點!所以，有些地方我覺得門馬很過癮，因為它通常像一個發酵的。

M: or it's been soaked in a sauce, while other places I find it quite fresh and crunchy.

男：或者是被泡過的，而其他地方我覺得挺新鮮的，脆脆的。

M: ...and that's what's cool about Ramen, is you can get a lot of them customizable.

M：......這也是拉麵最酷的地方，就是你可以得到很多的定製。

M: This is Chyashu, which I'm sure I'm not pronouncing properly.

男：這個是Chyashu，我肯定我的發音不對。

M: But basically it's just a really thinly sliced pork that goes into it.

M：但基本上就是一個很薄的豬肉片進去。

M: If you're at a bad location, it'll be tough, it'll be chewy... it'll taste like it's just been way over cooked and you're like; (nyang nyang nyang (tough chewing noises))

M：如果你在一個不好的位置，它將是艱難的，它會是有嚼勁的......它的味道就像它只是被煮得太熟了，你就像；（nyang nyang nyang（艱難的咀嚼聲））。

M: If you're at a great place, like this, it's gonna fall apart in your mouth.

男：如果你在一個好地方，像這樣的地方，吃到嘴裡就會散掉。

S: Aahhh

S：Aahhh

M: Ahhh~

M：啊啊~

S (deep sexy voice): Oh baby you understand me, don't you? Yes you do.

S（深沉性感的聲音）：哦，寶貝，你明白我，不是嗎？是的，你明白。

(M: ...?)

(M: ...?)

S (deep sexy voice): Put you in my stomach and remember you forever.

S（深沉性感的聲音）：把你放在我的肚子裡，永遠記住你。

S (deep sexy voice): You know what? I'm not even going to go to the bathroom, I'm gonna hold it in for you.

S（深沉性感的聲音）：你知道嗎？我連廁所都不去了，我要替你憋著。

S (deep sexy voice): I'm gonna keep you with me forever.

S（深沉性感的聲音）：我要讓你永遠和我在一起。

M: Ah- are you talking to me or the Ramen?

M：啊--你是在跟我說話還是在跟拉麵說話？

S: To you!!! Of course... my love......

S:敬你！！！當然......我的愛......

S: You gonna finish that?

S：你要完成這個任務嗎？

S: I will say though - uh - what I just did is a little bit strange, because in most of the Ramen shops that I've gone to,

S：不過我要說的是--呃--我剛才做的事情有點奇怪，因為在我去過的大多數拉麵店中。

S: I see people finish the noodles and then pretty much leave the broth behind,

S：我看到人們吃完麵條後，幾乎把湯汁都留下了。

S: but I don't know how they could do that, this is so delicious.

S：但是我不知道他們怎麼能這樣做，這個太好吃了。

S: Maybe because it's not super healthy, or whatnot, so people just want to have the noodles instead,

S:也許是因為它不是超級健康的， 或者什麼的， 所以人們只是想 有面條代替。

S: but I think I'm like one of the only people that I know that finishes my broth.

S：但我想我就像我知道的唯一一個完成我的肉湯的人。

M: What you have to do, is book a plane ticket, you need to fly to Japan, S: Look, come all the way here.

M：你要做的，就是訂一張飛機票，你要飛到日本去，S：你看，大老遠的跑過來。

M: you come to Fukuoka, ok, you come to Kurume, and then you order the soup, (S: Yes, yes, yes...)

M：你來福岡，好的，你來久留米，然後你點湯，（S：是，是，是......）。

M: and then you go, oh my god, I know what you're talking about now! S: I understand now, I understand.

M：然後你就會說，天啊，我現在知道你在說什麼了!S：我現在明白了，我明白了。

M: ...and you'll join our club.

M：......你就會加入我們的俱樂部。

M: Mmm! S: You know what, I don't think we actually... um...

M：嗯！S：你知道嗎，我不認為我們真的......嗯......。

(sad music) M: (humming) S: filmed enough? Should we get another bowl, just in case?

悲傷的音樂）M：（哼）S：拍夠了嗎？要不要再買一碗，以備不時之需？

S: because people... wanna know... M: Right! Um... the card might have... corrupted and so...

S: 因為人們... 想知道...M: 對!嗯... 這張卡可能已經... 損壞了，所以... ...

S: Did we... did we record that properly?

S:我們... ... 我們是否記錄正確？

S&M: I'm not sure... M: ...if we...

S&M：我不確定... ...M: ...如果我們...

S&M: (happy cheering-like noises)

S&M：（快樂的歡呼聲一樣的聲音）。

(waiter talking)

（服務員說話）

S&M: (thanking)

S&M：（感謝）。

S: Um, so, are we supposed to say more about this?

S:嗯，所以，我們應該說更多關於這個？

S: Uhh.... M: Oh, we just wanted to... shovel it down?

S:Uhh....M：哦，我們只是想......把它剷下來？

S: We just wanna eat this. Here's for you... M: I see how this is.

S:我們只是想吃這個。這是給你的...M：我知道這是怎麼回事了。

S: Is this one bowl gonna be enough for us?

S：這一碗就夠我們吃了嗎？

S: Oh no, we're not have a (mumbles) M: err... didn't press record...

S:哦，不，我們沒有一個（喃喃自語）M：呃... ... 沒有按下記錄... ...

S&M: (mumbling & ermergerd'ing)

S&M：（喃喃自語&骨髓）。

M: I'm sure if anyone saw this right now, they're like, "look at that couple sharing a Ramen bowl together because they can't finish it."

M：我相信如果現在有人看到這個，他們會說："你看那對情侶因為吃不完而一起分享一碗拉麵。"

M: And we're like, yes! Sharing....! S: It's our third bowl of Ramen...

M：我們就說，好啊!分享....!S：這是我們吃的第三碗拉麵......

S: Sharing! M: Sharing it...

S：分享!M：分享吧...

S: Yes

S：是的

S: I'm ready for some warm snuggles.

S：我已經準備好了一些溫暖的擁抱。

S: 'bout to get naked, curl up in da bed M: In the middle of a Ramen shop? Really? S: and go to sleep.

S：要脫光衣服，蜷縮在床上 M：在拉麵店的中間？真的嗎？S: 然後去睡覺。

S: I love you gurl! M: Oh no, Simon's got the... Simon's got the food happies again.

S：我愛你，Gurl！M：哦，不，西蒙的... ...西蒙又拿到了食物的幸福。

(noises muffled because of Martina being squished against Simon's mic)

(由於瑪蒂娜被壓在西蒙的話筒上，聲音被掩蓋)

M: ??? ...really happy with food. (laughing)

M: ???.......真的很開心的食物。(笑)

S: You're the love of my life, you know that?

S：你是我一生的摯愛，你知道嗎？

M: What about ramen? S: I'm so happy that I married you!

M：那拉麵呢？S：我很高興，我嫁給了你!

M: I thought you were talking about... are you talking to Ramen or me?

M：我以為你說的是......你是在跟拉麵還是跟我說話？

S: Thank you for coming to Japan with me.

S:謝謝你和我一起到日本來

S: ...and participating in these food adventures.

S：......並參與這些食物的冒險。

(S: kiss noise) M: Are you food drunk? S: I just love you so much gurl.

S：親吻聲）M：你是不是吃醉了？S：我只是太愛你了gurl。

M: He's food drunk, people.

男：他是吃醉了，人。

S: You're the best thing that ever happened to me~ M(whisper): Food drunk!!!

S：你是我遇到的最好的事情~M（小聲）。食物醉了！！

S: I like your smell. You smell like snuggles.

S：我喜歡你的味道。你聞起來像依偎的味道。

M (whisper): For sure food drunk.

M（小聲）。肯定的食物醉。

S: Hush girl.

S：噓姑娘。

S: Whoo, alright, snuggle up.

S:喔，好吧，依偎在一起。

S: (slurp)

S：（嘖嘖）。

S: mmm-hmm M: (gasp)

S：嗯哼 M：（浪費了）。

M (whisper): He's eating it! S: No, no I'm just whispering (blows)

M(小聲)：他在吃呢!S：不，不，我只是小聲說（吹）。

S: (blows) That's- (blows)- that's what it is. (blows)

S:（打擊）這是 - （打擊） - 這是什麼。（打擊）

(now just happy background music)

(現在只是快樂的背景音樂)

(wet willy noise) M: ~ah!~

(溼溼的威利聲)M：~啊！~。

(next segment: Martina's sexy food porn voice)

(下一段：瑪蒂娜性感的食物色情聲音)

Oooh what's that? You though this video wouldn't have any sexy food porn voice talking?

哦，那是什麼？你以為這個視頻不會有什麼性感的食物色情聲音說話嗎？

Well, you were wrong. It's time to embarrass you in front of your family.

好吧，你錯了。是時候讓你在家人面前丟臉了。

What's that, they're watching right now? Oooooh!!

那是什麼，他們現在正在看？哦！！

What are these noises coming from the computer?

電腦裡發出的這些聲音是什麼？

It's all about food baby, it's all about food.

都是關於食物的寶貝，都是關於食物的。

Bet'cha wish you had headphones on now don't'cha?

我打賭你希望你現在戴著耳機，不是嗎？

You wanna see something sexy? Take a look at that meat, that beautiful piece of meat.

你想看點性感的東西嗎？看看那塊肉，那塊漂亮的肉。

OOU! I love the way you drop into that hot white milky liquid.

歐！我喜歡你掉進那熱乎乎的白色乳汁裡的樣子。

Oh, just like that.

哦，就是這樣。

Open it up, open it up, open it up!

打開它，打開它，打開它!

OOOOHHHH! Gently place it in... fantastic!

OOOOHHH！輕輕地把它放進去......太棒了!

(slurping noise)

（嘖嘖聲）

Oooh I could eat that every single day.

哦，我可以每天都吃這個。

Okay, it's safe now.

好了，現在安全了。

You can take off your headphones, and turn the volume back up.

你可以摘下耳機，再把音量調高。

Ha ha, I was lying! Did you know this restaurant did Fried Rice using the leftover pork from the Ramen?

哈哈，我是在撒謊!你知道這家店是用拉麵剩下的豬肉做的炒飯嗎？

Oh my god, look at it being tossed in that machine!

哦，我的上帝，看它被扔進那臺機器！

Just whipped around, back and forth, oooh what a naughty wok.

就這樣晃來晃去，來來回回，嗚嗚，真是個淘氣的鑊。

Throw that all over my rice covered body oooohhhhh, yeah,

扔在我滿身米飯的身上哦哦哦，耶。

just like that, I love it when you beat that egg in that hot, sizzling wok, OOOHHHHHHH

就像這樣，我喜歡你在熱騰騰的鍋裡打雞蛋的樣子，哦哦哦哦

(fading) add those onions in as well... ooh you're such a bad, bad, chef...aren't you?

(淡淡的)把那些洋蔥也加進去......哦，你真是個壞壞的廚師......是不是？

That's right, serve that rice up into that box.

沒錯，把米飯盛到那個盒子裡。

OH! Look at it shaking, my God, with those flavors, uh! I could have that every day.

哦！看它搖搖晃晃，我的上帝， 與這些口味，呃！我可以有，每天。

Okay, now I'm done.

好了，現在我完成了。

Was it good for you?

對你有好處嗎？