today's my birthday, I turn 37.

今天是我的生日，我37歲。

You know what I got for my birthday?

你知道我的生日禮物是什麼嗎？

An ingrown hair.

一根生長的頭髮。

No, for real, what I got from Martina,

不，是真的，我從瑪蒂娜那裡得到的。

I got this cool little scratcher map,

我得到了這個很酷的小刮刮樂地圖。

so we can scratch off all the countries that we went to,

這樣我們就可以把我們去過的所有國家都劃掉。

'cause we've been to a lot of countries, this is amazing.

因為我們去過很多國家，這是驚人的。

My ducky is very sweet,

我的小鴨子很可愛。

and you know what else she set up for me?

你知道她還為我準備了什麼嗎？

So, when I come downstairs in the morning,

所以，當我早上下樓的時候。

I had...

我有...

You see that?

你看到了嗎？

She put all this tinsel?

她放了這麼多金銀？

Is it called tinsel?

這叫錦上添花嗎？

What is this called?

這叫什麼？

Arts and crafts girl, what's this called?

文藝女郎，這叫什麼？

My ducky doesn't want me to vlog this anymore.

我的小鴨子不想讓我再拍這個視頻了。

Martina hates when these, you ready?

瑪蒂娜討厭這些，你準備好了嗎？

Wee!

小威！

Happy birthday to me!

祝我生日快樂！

Oh (sheep bleating) I got tangled.

哦（羊咩咩）我被纏住了。

Oh my sweet girl, I'm gonna cry,

哦，我親愛的女孩，我要哭了。

she made me a little breakfast bento

她給我做了一個小小的早餐便當

look, you have the little toothpicks on there.

你看，你有 小牙籤在那裡。

Ducky, this is amazing!

Ducky 這真是太神奇了!

It's such a small toothpick!

這麼小的一根牙籤!

Oh my God, Ducky come here, beautiful girl.

我的天，Ducky過來，美女

We are now on our way to-- - Shinjuku-eki.

我們現在要去新宿關了。

- And then where are we going from there?

- 然後我們要去哪裡？

- Well I'm not gonna tell you,

- 我不會告訴你的

when you're trying to put me on camera

當你想讓我上鏡的時候。

but I'm not gonna do it to you.

但我不會對你這樣做。

- It's a surprise.

- 這是一個驚喜。

- But I did just get an alert saying that there is a delay,

- 但我剛才確實收到了一個提示，說有延遲。

because there's some kind of an accident between Harajuku,

因為在原宿之間發生了一些意外。

and Shinjuku, and Shibuya-eki,

和新宿、澀谷駅。

so hopefully we'll make it to Shinjuku.

所以希望我們能去新宿。

- Oh.

- 哦。

- We have to get there by 3:30.

- 我們必須在3: 30之前到達那裡。

- Is it ram, oh my gosh, look at that,

- 是公羊嗎，天哪，你看那。

I should not have zoomed in. - Oh wow.

我不應該放大。- 哦，哇。

- Tell me where we're going, answer me!

- 告訴我我們要去哪裡，回答我！

- No.

- 不知道

- One of the big things for our birthdays

- 我們生日的一件大事

that we always do--

我們總是這樣做 --

(Martina speaking in a foreign language)

(瑪蒂娜在講外語)

Is we always have to try to surprise each other

我們是不是總要給對方一個驚喜？

on our birthdays.

在我們生日的時候。

It happened for, Martina mentioned it once,

它發生的原因，瑪蒂娜曾經提到過。

at the beginning of our relationship,

在我們的關係開始的時候。

and we've been doing it ever since.

從此我們就開始做了。

- When will it stop?

- 什麼時候會停止？

- When will it stop?

- 什麼時候會停止？

So much work. - Please,

這麼多的工作。- 求你了

I'm tired of it, no more.

我已經厭倦了，沒有了。

Blue Bottle Coffee's here,

藍瓶咖啡在這裡。

I was so excited when it finally came,

當它終於來的時候，我很興奮。

and then I realized it was a nightmare

然後我才意識到這是一場噩夢

because Shinjuku Station always sucks,

因為新宿站總是很爛。

and it's always filled with 97 people with no tables.

而且總是坐滿了97個人，沒有桌子。

- True.

- 沒錯

- There's other good coffee shops,

- 還有其他不錯的咖啡店。

which you're gonna find out in this video later on,

你會發現，在這個視頻後。

but Simon doesn't know (vocalizing).

但西蒙不知道（發聲）。

- Ah, so we're going to a nice coffee shop!

- 啊，所以我們要去一個不錯的咖啡店！

- [Martina] Not right now, but it's a hint.

- 現在沒有，但這是一個暗示。

- Oh!

- 哦！

- [Martina] Eat that hint.

- 吃下這個提示。

- I just had to turn on the camera, Martina, tell me more.

- 我只需要打開相機，瑪蒂娜，告訴我更多。

- No.

- 不知道

- [Simon] Spill your guts.

- [西蒙]把你的膽子吐出來

- No.

- 不知道

So there are a bunch of shops that, hey wait a second!

所以有一堆店家，哎，等一下!

- Martina's telling me more!

- 瑪蒂娜在告訴我更多！

- Did you have that on the whole time?

- 你一直都開著這個嗎？

Seriously? - I did.

真的嗎？- 我是認真的

You just turn on the camera and she confesses all.

你只要打開攝像頭，她就會坦白一切。

Tell me your deepest darkest secrets.

告訴我你最深最黑暗的祕密。

- [Martina] No.

- [Martina]不

- [Simon] What else are you hiding from me?

- 你還有什麼事瞞著我？

- Uh BTS'-- - Oh my God,

- 呃，BTS'-- 哦，我的上帝。

are you (duck quacks) crazy?

你（鴨子叫）瘋了嗎？

This is my birthday, now it's my death day!

這是我的生日，現在是我的死亡之日!

- No, no, stop.

- 不，不，停止。

(light bouncy music)

(輕快的音樂)

- We have finally arrived at the location, we are at...

- 我們終於到了地點，我們在... ...

I'm not sure yet.

我還不確定

What?

什麼？

- The last order's, shoot.

- 最後一單的，拍。

- At three? - It wasn't on the website,

- 三點？- 網站上沒寫

it said that it closes at 3:30,

它說，它在3: 30關閉。

but I thought the last order would be 3:30

但我以為最後一單會是3點30分

'cause they usually close at four.

因為他們通常四點就關門了

- Gotcha.

- 抓到你了

- But they close at three. - Ah it's alright.

- 但他們三點就關門了- 啊，沒關係。

- Shoot, darn, and dang it.

- 射擊，該死的，和當它。

- Well there's lots of other cool stuff

- 還有很多其他很酷的東西

we saw on the way.

我們在路上看到的。

- [Martina] So, 11:30 to 2:30, the last order's at three.

- 那麼，11: 30到2: 30，最後一個訂單在3點。

- [Simon] Well we learned something new about restaurants.

- [西蒙]嗯，我們學到了一些關於餐館的新東西。

- Well we didn't--

- 我們沒有...

- [Simon] If you ever see a sign about when it closes--

- [西蒙]如果你看到關於什麼時候關閉的標誌 --

- Give it half an hour.

- 給它半個小時。

- [Simon] Yeah give it half an hour.

- [西蒙]是的，給它半個小時。

- We did a video on food, remember?

- 我們做了一個關於食物的視頻，還記得嗎？

We talked about looking at orders and stuff,

我們談到了看訂單什麼的。

we've talked about how many times

我們已經說過多少次了

we've been bamboozled by it but it's never caught on camera.

我們被它迷惑了，但它從來沒有被拍到。

Oh, I have a second back up.

哦，我有第二個備份。

- Oh! - But she didn't,

- 但她沒有

she searches wildly on her map that she's pinned from before

她在她之前貼的地圖上瘋狂地搜索著

knowing that near everything is closed,

知道近乎所有的東西都是封閉的。

now that it nears 3:30.

現在已經接近3點半了。

(light bouncy music)

(輕快的音樂)

Okay, we're in official ramen hunting mode now.

好了，我們在官方拉麵狩獵模式，現在。

- Yep.

- 是的。

- This is my favorite kinda mode,

- 這是我最喜歡的挺模式。

we don't often coincide on ramen hunting days,

我們不經常重合 在拉麵狩獵日。

like there's some days where Simon's like,

就像有一些日子，其中西蒙的喜歡，

"I just really wanna smash a greasy bowl of ramen,"

"我只是很想砸一碗油膩的拉麵"。

and I'm like "Yeah I don't feel like that today."

我很喜歡 "是啊，我不覺得今天。"

And then we're like "Dang it,"

然後我們就像 "當它"，

and then there's another time when I'm like,

然後有另一個時間 當我喜歡，

"Let's go for some greasy-ass ramen,"

"我們去吃油膩膩的拉麵吧"。

and Simon's like, "I just worked out and I don't want that."

和西蒙的一樣， "我只是工作了，我不希望這樣。"

And I'm like...

而我就像...

But today, a miracle has happened.

但今天，奇蹟發生了。

- We both have agreed. - It's a birthday miracle,

- 我們都同意了。- 這是一個生日的奇蹟。

we're both like "Let's go smash a bowl of ramen."

我們都喜歡 "讓我們去砸一碗拉麵。"

And we're both like "Yes!"

我們都說 "好！"

I'm sorry.

我很抱歉

This is really (speaks in foreign language) honestly.

這真的是（講外文）實話實說。

It's temporarily closed, it's a total fluke.

暫時關閉，完全是僥倖。

It's temporarily closed.

暫時關閉了。

- [Simon] Yeah, all right.

- [西蒙]是的，所有的權利。

What else you got on this list here?

你在這個名單上還有什麼？

- See, this is when people don't understand

- 你看，這就是人們不理解的時候。

when we say ramen hunt.

當我們說拉麵狩獵。

- We've been walking for hours.

- 我們已經走了幾個小時了。

(Martina vocalizing)

（瑪蒂娜發聲）

I think we might finally have found a place that's open.

我想我們可能終於找到了一個開放的地方。

We're going for Hakata style ramen--

我們要去吃博多拉麵...

- And Hakata style ramen is so good, it's so creamy.

- 而且博多風味的拉麵也很好吃，奶香四溢。

- Okay, let's go girl, let's go.

- 好了，我們走吧，姑娘，我們走吧。

(light upbeat music)

（輕快的音樂）

Yeah boy!

好樣的！

Yes everybody,

是的，各位。

we are wearing matching shirts on my birthday.

我生日的時候，我們穿的是配套的襯衫。

Cheers love. - Cheers.

乾杯，愛。- 乾杯。

And I look like a gigantic woman,

而我看起來像個巨大的女人。

and you look like a tiny boy.

你看起來像個小男孩

- Oh no! - Oh no!

- 哦，不

(Simon speaks in foreign language)

(西蒙用外語講話)

Did you say (speaks in foreign language)

你是說（用外語說）

as though you live in Busan?

好像你住在釜山一樣？

- Stop it, you're so huge.

- 別鬧了，你這麼大。

- Do you have your tiny half drink halfling?

- 你有你的小半杯酒嗎？

Yours is poured in but a thimble.

你的是倒在不過一個頂針。

- Ready?

- 準備好了嗎？

Cheers.

乾杯。

- Ding!

- 叮！

I don't know how I'm going to get through this.

我不知道該怎麼度過這個難關。

- Gorgeous egg.

- 華麗的雞蛋。

We are starving but we are dedicated, alright?

我們是在捱餓，但我們很敬業，好嗎？

- That's enough.

- 這就夠了。

- That's enough. - We need to eat.

- 這就夠了。- 我們需要吃飯。

We need to eat. - It's time for me to eat.

我們要吃飯了- 我該吃飯了

- [Narrator] Oh, Hakata style ramen,

- 哦，博多式拉麵。

you are a dirty, tonkatsu ramen with a thick oily top,

你是個髒兮兮的湯圓拉麵，上面有厚厚的油汙。

unforgiving with your lush broth

醉翁之意不在酒

clinging to those thin noodles.

粘著那些細麵條。

Ooh, light, bouncy,

哦，輕盈，有彈性。

but not too overpowering for them.

但對他們來說又不至於太過強勢。

I can't wait to slurp these up, heck yes,

我已經迫不及待地想把這些東西吞下去了，嘿嘿，沒錯。

I could eat these everyday.

我可以每天吃這些。

(record scratches) - Why you keep meowing?

你為什麼一直喵喵叫？

Why do you keep meowing?

你為什麼一直喵喵叫？

Explain yourself to me tiny sir, huh?

解釋給我聽，小個子先生，嗯？

I'm trying to do a voice over, hm?

我想做一個配音，嗯？

Mommy's trying to do a sexy food porn voice over, and you,

媽媽想做一個性感的食物色情配音，而你。

where are you going?

你要去哪裡？

Do you wanna go up here?

你想上去嗎？

Come on, let's get you up here, wanna smell the window?

來吧，讓我們把你弄上來，想聞聞窗外的味道嗎？

There you go, hi-yah, for you.

給你，嗨呀，給你。

I know you like that, I do indeed.

我知道你喜歡這樣，我確實喜歡。

- [Narrator] And these tiny Fukuoka style Gyoza,

- 還有這些小小的福岡式餃子。

they are sinful, you could eat 10 of these just by yourself.

他們是罪惡的，你可以吃10個這些只是自己。

Oh danger, we are in danger.

哦，危險，我們有危險。

Oh my God, this egg, it's been smoked,

哦，我的上帝，這個雞蛋，它是被薰過的。

it literally tastes smokey,

從字面上看，它的味道是煙燻的。

and delicious soft yoke at the same time, ooh.

和美味的軟玉同時，哦。

- I would say that was quite the scrumptious meal,

- 我想說這是相當豐盛的一餐。

wouldn't you say so, darling?

你不這樣說嗎，親愛的？

- I would indeed, I liked smashing that bowl of ramen,

- 我的確會，我喜歡砸那碗拉麵。

and those 10 gyozas, along with the lemon sour.

還有那10個餃子，還有檸檬酸。

- Burning secret question is, where are we going next?

- 燃燒的祕密問題是，我們下一步要去哪裡？

- Okay, now we're going on an adventure.

- 好了，現在我們要去冒險了。

- So we have left our little shop now, wait, what?

- 所以我們現在已經離開了我們的小店，等等，什麼？

We've left our...

我們已經離開了我們的...

I'm going to try this again.

我要再試一次。

So we just left our ramen shop,

所以我們剛離開拉麵店。

and now we're on our way for coffee, it's 4:30 p.m,

現在我們在去喝咖啡的路上，現在是下午4點半了

I know we shouldn't drink coffee this late,

我知道這麼晚了，我們不應該喝咖啡。

but if we don't, we're gonna die.

但如果我們不這樣做，我們就會死。

That's it, so we gotta have some coffee, or we're gonna die.

就這樣，所以我們得喝杯咖啡，否則我們會死的。

(upbeat quirky music)

（歡快古怪的音樂）

So we are at the-- - 4/4 Seasons Coffee.

所以我們在... - 4/4季節咖啡。

- 4/4 Seasons Coffee, this is the first time

- 4/4四季咖啡，這是第一次。

I've ever had to wait in line for coffee.

我曾經為喝咖啡排過隊。

What?

什麼？

Waiting in line?

排隊等候？

For coffee?

喝咖啡嗎？

This better be good. - I have a theory.

這最好是好事。- 我有一個理論。

- [Simon] Let's hear it.

- [西蒙]讓我們聽聽吧

- Okay, some shops are very meticulous

- 好吧，有些店家很細心

with their hand dripping.

用手滴水不漏。

That's what they wanna do.

這就是他們想要做的。

And there might only one barista, or two baristas,

而且可能只有一個咖啡師，或者兩個咖啡師。

and so what you're waiting for is really good coffee,

所以你在等的是真正的好咖啡。

in a neighborhood that is surrounded by a lot of chains,

在一個被很多連鎖店包圍的街區。

because we are in the Shinjuku area,

因為我們在新宿區。

it's like a lot of chains,

這就像很多鏈子。

and so it's like you gotta wait in line

所以它就像你得排隊等候。

for someone to drip each person a coffee,

讓人給每個人滴上一杯咖啡。

and every coffee takes what, three to five minutes?

而每杯咖啡需要多少時間，三到五分鐘？

- Alright, let's see what this coffee is all about.

- 好吧，讓我們來看看這咖啡是怎麼回事。

Because I need it, all about, inside of my stomach.

因為我需要它，所有關於，我的肚子裡面。

(people chattering)

(人們喋喋不休)

- Almost everyone has the pudding.

- 幾乎每個人都有布丁。

- [Simon] Yeah, I hope they're not sold out.

- [西蒙]是的，我希望他們沒有賣完。

- Okay so I wasn't even gonna go for pudding,

- 好吧，所以我甚至不打算去布丁。

I should have known,

我早該知道的

the first thing on the list said pudding,

單子上的第一件事就說是布丁。

of course should get it.

當然應該得到它。

I have to try the pudding, that's like my,

我一定要嚐嚐布丁，那就像我的。

I have to put it up against my own, you know?

我必須把它與我自己的，你知道嗎？

- [Simon] You'll be putting it up against your own.

- [西蒙]你會把它和你自己的對立起來。

(horn honks)

(喇叭聲)

Can't light it.

不能點燃它。

- [Martina] It's a representation of your age, 30--

- [瑪蒂娜]這是一個代表你的年齡， 30 --

- [Simon] Okay you don't have to put that many

- [西蒙]好吧，你不必把那麼多的

candles in my pudding, hey. - This is 30.

蠟燭在我的布丁，哎。- 這是30。

- [Simon] Hey.

- [西蒙]嘿。

- Come again.

- 再來吧

(Martina mumbles)

（瑪蒂娜喃喃自語）

It was so lovely, it's called 4/4 Seasons Coffee

它很可愛，它叫四四方方的咖啡。

in Shinjuku, and they were so crazy busy when we got here,

在新宿，我們來的時候，他們忙得不可開交。

as you saw, and I asked them if it's always like this,

正如你所看到的，我問他們是否總是這樣。

and she's like they just got really popular

和她一樣，他們只是得到了真正的流行。

from their pudding, and originally I wasn't gonna get it,

從他們的布丁，本來我是不會得到它。