can look back at this video and say, "We

一年後，當我們回頭看這部影片時，就可以說：

had no idea what we had coming". So

我還真不知道我們以前經歷過了這樣的時期

another year has passed which means we're all

又一年過去了表示我們

one year older which means we're growing

都老了一歲，也表示我們就跟其他人一樣都在成長，

as people which- ah-.. Yeah this is a stretch I

也就表示...嗯這句話越變越長了，我不知道怎麼轉到這個話題的

didn't have a transition as a youngster I

當身為一個小小孩時

was prone to believing people pretty

我很容易就二話不說地相信

much unconditionally

人們所說的話

as with most children. I just had too

就像大部分的小孩一樣

much trust for my own good, like, "Oh

我就只是太過於信任他人了，就像：

would anyone have any reason to lie to

「喔，其他人怎麼會有理由對我說謊呢？

me,

這世界只充滿了好人跟純潔的事物！」

the world is full of nothing but nice

當然我現在已經脫離

people and purity!", of course I've grown out

那種單純的心理，也變得更加警覺了

of that mentality and am a lot more

但曾經有段時間

cautious. But for a while people could

人們如果告訴我任何事，我都會相信他們

just tell me things and I'd just believe

我常常在想那些人們塞進我腦袋裡，

them.

那些比扯鈴還扯的謊言，而且我把它們當成事實

I got thinking about all the ridiculous

而現在我決定列出那些最誇張的謊言

things people put in my head that I

然後只是讓你知道一下

stored as fact, and I decided to make a

在這些故事發生的時候，我只有，大概，七歲或更小吧

list of the craziest ones, and also just

別擔心

letting you know I was, like, younger than

我並不是前幾個月才發現那些不是真的

7 in all of these stories. Don't worry

當我一年級的時候

I didn't just find out these things

不知道為甚麼但我媽告訴我鋁箔紙有毒，

aren't true like a couple months ago or

如果我一旦咬了，我就會死掉

anything. When I was in first grade for

有點奇怪但我想我知道為甚麼我媽會這麼說的理由...？

some reason my mom told me aluminum foil

想當然地，咬著鋁箔紙可能導致（微小的）電流通過

is poison and if I ever bit I'd die. A bit

基本上如果鋁箔紙與

strange but I think I know the idea

牙套、補牙的金屬，或者像這樣的東西

behind it...?

接觸的話呢，他們會產生電流反應

Apparently biting foil can induce a

造成一點點的觸電。

"""galvanic shock"""

但小時候的我只想說

Basically if the oil comes in contact

牙齒→和鋁箔紙接觸→死翹翹

with braces, metal fillings, something

因此我嚇死了

like that the medals will react with

事實上我當時根本沒戴牙套或有任何

each other and create a little electric

金屬的東西在我嘴巴裡頭

shock. But all I knew as a kid was

如果我試看看咬下去的話，根本不會發生任何事情

Teeth > contact with aluminum foil > Death. And I was

我也記得隔天我去學校的時候

petrified

告訴我朋友說：「你知道嗎？

I didn't even have braces or anything

如果你咬了鋁箔紙的話，你就會死！」

metal in my mouth at the time so nothing

然後她回答我：「我想我曾經咬過鋁箔紙欸。」

what even happened if I tried it. I also

之後我想：「那為甚麼你沒死？」

remember going to school the next day

蚱蜢會朝你的鞋子裡吐酸液。

and telling my friend, "Did you know that

這個可能也需要解釋一下

if you bite aluminum foil you'll die?" And she

我那時在下課時間和朋友

goes I think, "I've bit foil before

光腳在草原裡跑來跑去

and I was like "how are you not dead?" Grasshoppers spit acid in

當我們回去之後，我們要把鞋子穿上時

your shoes

有一隻小小的蚱蜢坐在我右腳的鞋底

This one probably needs explaining to

「你們看！有一隻好可愛的蚱蜢在穿我的鞋欸！」

I was at recess with some friends and we

然後我有個朋友就說：

are running around in the grass

「喔我的老天啊，蚱蜢會吐酸液欸！快把它拿走！」

without our shoes on. When we went back to put

然後我們全部人開始慌張了起來

them on there was a little grasshopper

但其實那隻蚱蜢早就在我的鞋子裡死了

sitting at the bottom of my right shoe.

我查了網路為什麼她會這麼想

"Guys look, a cute little grasshopper is

結果其實是蚱蜢會吐一種棕色液體

wearing my shoe!" And one of my friends

以保護自己別被天敵吃掉

goes, "Oh my god, grasshoppers spit acid!

這種棕色液體就叫做菸草汁

Get it out!" And then we all start panicking

雖然說這有一丁點偏酸性

at the fact that there was a death grasshopper

但是它最糟也只會讓你的衣服弄髒而已

in my shoe.

他們幾乎無害，但喔老兄，不，當時的我已經在腦袋裡

I looked up like she could have thought

想像出一個超級無敵可怕的酸液

that and it actually is a fact that

只要任何東西碰到它，都會被溶出一個大洞

grasshoppers can spit a brown liquid to

還有，只是說說而已

protect themselves from predators

但我並不是指說迷幻藥(跟酸液同字)，雖然

it's called tobacco juice and even

那感覺幾乎一樣嚇人

though it's slightly acidic

說到弄髒衣服，

the worst you really can do is stain your

我有一次在班上吃午餐的時候

clothes. It's pretty much harmless but

有一個男生拿出了一包

oohooho dude, no, I had the image in my head of

他媽媽幫他帶的無花果籽

some Breaking Bad hydrofluoric acid

我們班上很多人沒看過這種東西

dissolved through everything it touches

畢竟無花果算是一種異國水果

kinda mean. Also just saying I didn't

所以這引起了很多人的注意

mean the drug acid even though that

我們都在問一堆有關

could be equally terrifying.

無花果的問題

Speaking of staining clothes I was at

然後那男生說：「你知道無花果籽

lunch one day with the rest of my class

可以弄髒你的衣服

and one boy took out a bag of

而且你永遠洗不乾淨嗎？

pomegranate seeds his mom packed for him in

哇！那一定是個很強的水果

his lunch. A lot of us hadn't seen them

永遠洗不掉？永遠不可能？

before because it's a bit of an exotic

連強大力量如

fruit. So it cost of attention and we are

OxiClean強力洗衣精

all asking a bunch of questions about

把最難搞的污漬也清潔溜溜

them.

然後我們就看著那男生坐在

The boy said, "Did you know pomegranate

離袋子很遠的地方吃著他的無花果籽

seeds can stain your clothes and it'll

因為他不想要把汁液噴到他身上

never come out?!?"

現在再回頭看，這絕對是他媽媽用誇飾法來嚇小孩

*GASP* Woah! That must be one powerful fruit!

因為她不想要處理那些髒污

It never comes out? Never ever forever?

這算是一種當父母的騙術，如果要我來說的話

Not even with the power of *BILLY MAYS WALKS IN* OXICLEAN

這有點詭異她在世界上的某處而她根本不知道

LAUNDRY STAIN REMOVER IT GETS

她不小心也給了我那個(錯誤的)知識

THE TOUGH STAINS O U T and then we watched the

接下來這個其實有點常見

kitty to bag a pomegranate seeds sittin

而我想有很多人也有被

sideways at the seats on the space next

灌輸這種迷思很久很久

to him because he didn't want to spill

坐得太靠近電視會傷害你的眼睛

'em on himself.

我也對這做了一點小調查

Looking back it was definitely just his

雖然說這件事聽起來很像是真的

mom exaggerating because she didn't want to have

但顯然沒有任何確實存在的證據顯示說

to deal with stains and laundry. A slight

坐在電視前會對你的眼睛造成危害

parenting trick if I do say so myself.

但小小Jaiden相信了。

It's weird to think she's out there

你知道我因為那件迷思做了什麼嗎?

somewhere and she doesn't even realize

站在電視的正前方

she accidentally taught me that lesson too.

嗯，因為某些原因我小時候我真的很想要很想要一副眼鏡

This was actually kind of common to

我不知道那想法打哪兒來的

believe and I think a lot of people have

我真的超喜歡眼鏡，也想要一副

been passing this myth around for a long

所以當沒有人在看的時候，我會偷偷走到

time. Sitting too close to the TV is bad

電視的正前方然後就這麼盯著它

for your eyes. I did research on this one

我跟它的距離應該只有大約2.5公分吧

as well and even though it might seem

「這一定會讓我戴眼鏡。」這沒用，很明顯地

like it could be true

我其實視力還蠻不錯的說

there's apparently no actual evidence

說不定站得離電視太近還可以增進你的視力

that sitting in front of the TV is

不過我很高興我的視力減弱計畫沒有成功

damaging to your eyes. but 'ol little 'ol

因為有眼鏡看起來很不舒服又很不方便

Jaiden believed it and you know what I did

我要向那些戴眼鏡、隱眼或角膜塑型片人致上最高敬意

with that information? Stand directly in

願你們事事順心

front of the TV.

這讓我們這些沒有戴眼鏡的人都忘了

Yeah, for some reason when I was younger

有好視力是多好的事情了

I really, really wanted glasses

接下來這個跟有點相關，因為這又談到眼睛了

I don't know where that came from, I just

如果你試著用你的眼睛往後看到你的腦

liked the look of glasses and wanted

你的眼睛就會卡住，然後你就會永遠看不到了

them. So when no one was looking I would go up

這和另外一個眼睛迷思有一點像：

to the TV screen and stare at it. Like

如果你太常鬥雞眼的話，你的眼睛就永遠會變成那樣喔

one inch away from my face.

我從來沒有相信鬥雞眼那個，

"this will get me glasses" but it didn't

但我曾經相信永遠看不到的這個

work, obviously. I actually have really good eyesight.

有一個朋友有一次告訴我如果你一直把眼睛向後轉

Maybe standing too close to the TV

你可能可以看得到你的大腦

will improve your vision. But yeah I'm

然後我們花了一整天嘗試能不能辦到

glad my eyesight sabotage plan didn't

之後我回到家，我問我媽媽這件事是不是真的

work because having glasses just seems

然後她說：「不要這樣做，你的眼睛會卡在裡面。」

like a hassle and inconvenience. Tip of the hat

我想我會這麼快就相信的原因是

hat to anyone out there with glasses or

因為如果你真的試著把眼球往上翻，會有一點痛

annoyed by them. Wish you the best; we

畢竟他們並不是被設計拿來做這樣的動作的

annoyed by them. Wish you the best; we

而我想那就像是你的身體在說：

people without those things forget how

「不要再推了，這是個警告！」

good we have it.

而直到現在

This was a bit related because it's

我還是會怕把眼睛逼到他們的「旋轉極限」

about eyeballs again. If you try to use

我不知道除了這個詞，我還能怎麼說

your eyes to look back into your head

我知道這不是真的，但這還是一直被我放在心上

at your brain, they'll get stuck and you'll be

我很怕我永遠都會瞎掉

blind forever. It's a bit of a spin-off

然後最後一個我小時候相信的最扯的事

of the other eyeball myth of, "If you

嗯...我不知道這怎麼發生的

cross your eyes too much, they'll get

沒有人跟我講過，我真的不知道

stuck like that!" I never believed that

我的腦袋當時出了什麼差錯，但我曾經將

one, but I believed this brain one.

「破傷風」和...

A friend told me once that if you tried to

「愛滋病」搞混

look at the back of your head with your

我不知道我怎麼會這麼認為

eyes, you might be able to see your brain

當時我根本還不知道愛滋病是什麼

and we spent the whole day trying to do it.

然後我也覺得我頻道的內容大部分都比較需要大人陪同觀賞，

Then when I went home I asked my mom

所以如果你是個小小孩正在看

about it and she said, "Don't do that,

而你不知道愛滋病是什麼...

they'll get stuck." *T R A U M A* I think I believe it so

再過幾年，你父母自然會告訴你

quickly because if you try it does kinda

這是個你現在不用擔心的疾病

hurt your eyes a bit because they're

只有大人需要擔心

not really supposed to be able to look

所以呢，對，我曾經以為「破傷風」叫做「愛滋病」

back into your head like that. And I

從受感染的傷口得到的疾病，對我來說叫做愛滋病

thought that was like your body saying

而最糟的一次經驗是

"Don't push it!"

有一次某人不小心拿一支生鏽的鏟子割傷自己

"This is a warning!" And even to this day

我還記得我說：

their "rotation limit"

「小心喔，你可能會得到愛滋病！」

their "rotation limit"

蛤？為什麼？！

I don't know how else to say it. I know it's not

為甚麼這會發生在我身上？！

of my mind (which I'll never be able to

我不知道我腦子到底出了什麼差錯還有我怎麼會把這兩者搞混

see). And finally the most ridiculous

但隨便啦我現在知道差別了，這才是重點

see). And finally the most ridiculous

但我有時還是會口誤把「破傷風(Tetanus) 」講成「俄羅斯方塊(Tetris)」

thing I believed so I don't know how

「小心喔，你可能會得俄羅斯方塊！」

this happened

我最後在製作這部影片學到了很多知識

no one told me this I don't understand

既然我今天拆穿了這麼多樁謊言

where I went wrong here, but somehow I

我要跟你們一個我最近發現的實話

ended up confusing the disease "Tetanus"

要非常快，畢竟這已經是結尾了

with AIDS

有個朋友問我：「為什麼會有粉紅檸檬汁？」

didn't even know what AIDS was. And yes I

然後我就想：好問題！

didn't even know what AIDS was. And yes I

所以我查了一下

am considered a PG-channel for the most

然後我不是說什麼加草莓或任何水果來改變顏色喔

part so if you're a youngster watching

是真真實實的粉紅檸檬汁

and you don't know what AIDS is, your

所以呢粉紅檸檬汁的起源

parents will explain it more in a few years.

是在很久以前有個小販在馬戲團賣檸檬汁的時候

It's a disease that you don't need to

他突然沒有水可以調檸檬汁，所以他必須趕快找到更多水

worry about the time being. Only adults

而且這附近沒有河流能取水

So, yeah, I thought tetanus was called "aids".

然後他發現有一個表演者把紅色絲襪浸在一些水裡

So, yeah, I thought tetanus was called "aids".

那些水就變成粉紅色的了

The disease that you can get from an

然後他就用那些粉紅色的水去做更多的檸檬汁

infected cut was called AIDS to me. And

跟人們講說這是特別的「草莓風味」檸檬汁

the worst thing about it is this one

然後他就賣了更多像這樣的檸檬汁

time someone accidentally cut themselves

如果下一次你喝粉紅檸檬汁的時候

on a rusty shovel and I have the memory

髒髒馬戲團絲襪可能就會浮現在你的腦海

of saying "Careful, you could get AIDS!"

我真的很抱歉。

*cracking up* What, why?!?

How did this happen to me?!? I don't

understand what went wrong and how do I

mix those two things up but whatever I

know the difference now and that's all

that matters. But I do sometimes mix up

saying Tetanus and Tetris. "Careful, you

could get Tetris" *tetris music plays* I ended up learning a

debunked a bunch of lies, I'm going to

debunked a bunch of lies, I'm going to

tell you a truth I found out recently

Real quick since this is the end-card.

So a friend asked me what's the purpose of

pink lemonade. And I was like good

question! So I looked it up and i'm not

talking about the lemonade from

strawberries or any fruit to change the

color. Classic pink lemonade.

so apparently pink lemonade originated

because a long time ago way back in the

day there's a concession guy selling

lemonade at the circus and he ran out of

water and he had to hurry and find some

more and there is no river stream nearby

and he found that a performer had just

watched their red tights in some water

which turned pink, so used that pink water

to make more lemonade and just told

people it was a special "Strawberry type

lemonade" and he sold a bunch more

lemonade, the image of dirty circus tights

lemonade, the image of dirty circus tights

water might pop into your mind.

Sorry.