So I'm going to talk about phones.

But I'm not get-- you're not getting a phone.

So don't like--

[LAUGHTER]

Oh, she's talking about phones.

We're going to get a phone.

You're not getting a phone.

[LAUGHTER]

But Apple announced the new iPhone at their big keynote

event yesterday.

Their keynote event is kind of like a TED talk, but instead of

teaching you how to better yourself,

they teach you how to spend $1,000.

[LAUGHTER]

And instead of TED, it's Tim.

You know Tim Cook, right?

Tim Cook's Siri's husband.

[LAUGHTER]

I think so.

I don't know.

Yesterday Apple announced their iPhone 11.

And obviously, we all know how to count.

It's 7, 8, X, 11.

It goes like that.

So you can either run out and buy it,

or you can tape an iPhone 5 and an iPhone 6

together and make an 11.

[LAUGHTER]

That's what I'm going to do.

Plus it has improved battery and now lasts four hours longer,

like the Today Show.

[LAUGHTER]

So they announced-- [LAUGHS] It's long.

The Today Show is really creeping into my hour.

[LAUGHTER]

It's like--

The iPhone 11 Pro--

that's what they're calling it.

It has three cameras.

And now Kim Kardashian never is going to leave the house.

[LAUGHTER]

| hardly even a phone anymore.

Now it's more of a camera.

I don't even know if you can make calls on it.

It's really just a phone--

it's just a camera.

The most popular new feature of the iPhone 11

has a wide angle lens to take wider photos,

and it can take slow motion selfies.

So just like us, the phones will be now wider and slower.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

We love when you insult us, Ellen.

Yes, we're all wider and slower.

[LAUGHTER]

The new phone sounds great, but there are still

some other changes I'd like to see.

I want to see like when you have those three dots

and then they disappear, I want them to show you what

the person was going to say.

[LAUGHTER]

That's what I want.

Because you know, you're like, no, they changed their mind,

and they're--