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  • Hey, how's it going, bras Ma name is POOODIPAAHH i moved office again as you can see...

    嗨,大家好我是pewdiepie!

  • ...for another time.

    如你所見我又換工作室了...又一次

  • I'm in this new space, it's pretty cool. It's my own space.

    這是一個新的空間,非常酷,是我自己的天地

  • It's definitely my... *laughs*

    我在這個新空間,感覺很酷,這是我自己的空間

  • pahla-a-a

    這絕對是我的...(笑

  • Y O U P I C K E D T H E W R O N G H O U S E F O O O O O O O O O O O O

    地方

  • Jack: This is mine. My padded cell Felix: I knew you were insane

    你選錯房子了傻子!!!!!

  • Felix: I knew you were one of those people with that-

    這是我的 ,我的軟墊天花板

  • Felix: *claps* We're going to do Five Weird Stuff Online

    我知道你瘋了,就像那些人一樣

  • Felix: With Jackspedicey.

    我們今天的主題是網路上的五樣怪東西

  • (music plays)

    跟jacksepticeye (綠色版的pewdiepie)

  • Felix: Item Number One. Jack: What are you going to start with?

    第一件物品 你要從哪個開始(我不知道

  • Felix: I don't know. Both: *lame laugh*

    就從這個最大的 我從網路上買來的這一大坨鬼東西

  • Felix: Let's go with the biggest. I have this bag of a bunch of shit I bought online.

    我的天 聖誕老公公

  • Jack: Oh my God, Santa-sama

    就從一些沒說服力但我想試試看的東西

  • Felix: Okay, let's start with something lame, but I kind of want to try it out.

    這是啥

  • Jack: What's it called? AIRZOOKA? Felix: Yeaaah!

    空氣砲!!!!!!!!!!(耶!!!!!!

  • Jack: It's like twice the size of that kid.

    那個玩具看起來比小孩大兩倍(笑

  • Felix: I feel like the scale is not...

    我覺得那個尺寸不是...

  • Jack: Perspective? Felix: Look at that

    只是目測的

  • Jack: *laughs* Felix: Heh

    (笑)

  • Felix: So this is an bazooka

    所以這是一個火箭筒

  • Felix: Seems like too much effort to put together.

    噢,這看起來組裝好會很麻煩

  • Jack: No, it looks cool!

    不這看起來很酷

  • Jack: The fuck is all this?

    這看起來就像什麼他媽洛克會用的

  • Jack: Looks like something fucking Megaman uses

    這其實真的是

  • Felix: It does yeah, actually

    你準備好要接受空氣砲了嗎

  • Felix: Maybe I should read the instructions Jack: *laughs*

    你在幹嘛(我在充氣

  • Felix: Are you ready to get airzooked? (screaming)

    你準備好要接受空氣砲了嗎兄弟

  • Felix: What are you doing?

    不,你應該要這樣拿

  • Jack: I'm- I'm zooking ;)

    我知道啊

  • Jack: ..Bazinga.

    噢糟糕,好了我懂了

  • Felix: BAZINGA

    要多近(我不知道!!!!!

  • Felix: Are you ready to get airzookad, bruuh?

    呀你怕了啊

  • Jack: No-

    你之前有這樣捉弄過我

  • Jack: You have to pull like this

    看看他的蠢臉

  • Felix: I knew that Jack: *giggles*

    喔我的天啊(會痛嗎

  • Felix: Oh shit, okay, I get it

    喔靠

  • Felix: How close?

    空氣砲!!!!!!

  • Jack: I don't know.

    不!!!!!!

  • Both: *laugh* Felix: You scared now, boy?

    好了,打我吧兄弟(我準備好了

  • Felix: You were making fun of it before!

    你眨眼。 就輸了

  • Felix: I can see your stupid face through here as well.

    這東西他媽的爛

  • F L O O P

    喔!!!!!空氣砲!!!!!

  • Jack: Oh my God! *laughs*

    感謝天這裡有遮蓋物

  • Felix: Was it bad?

    你是真的把它弄壞了嗎(沒拉,喔對

  • Jack: Just POW!!!

    喔它還是運作得很好

  • Felix: *breaks airzooka* OH, SHIT!

    天殺的

  • Both: AIRZOOKA?! *rip*

    它的聲音像打雷一樣

  • Felix: NOOO!

    對會嚇到人

  • Jack: Okay

    3,2,1

  • Felix: Hit me, bro

    喔天啊看看我(我看起來怎麼樣

  • Felix: I'm ready *mad pewds*

    真他媽的奇怪

  • Jack: Ya ready, boi?

    往前去看鏡頭

  • Jack: *imitates Felix* You blink,

    我啥都看不到(喔太近了太近了

  • y o u l o s e.

    喔我的天啊(我甚至連自己都看不到

  • (airzookafail.mp3)

    我的天啊!!!!!!

  • Both: *giggle*

    你的衣服(非常好!!

  • Jack: This thing fucking sucks ;)

    很好(非常好,非常

  • *Jack blows air towards Felix*

    非常好,看起來像

  • Felix: A A A A H H H H

    我記得我五歲時

  • Jack: AIRZOOKA!

    幼稚園時,我演彼得潘

  • Felix: Thank God there was cover here

    對,而且我真的有那套衣服

  • Felix: Did you break it for real?

    但那是借來的,所以我就想,喔那不是我的

  • Jack: No the- ohh yeah.

    所以,我應該脫掉我的內褲嗎

  • *rip jack again*

    什麼!?(我不知道,其實那還蠻噁心的

  • Both: *laugh* Jack: That works really well.

    那超噁心的啊

  • Felix: Do it..

    我不知道,我那時還只是小孩好嗎

  • Both: *Laugh*

    所以我就像這樣全裸上台

  • Felix: Jesus-

    像這樣!?(對呀

  • Jack: It's the sound as well

    喔,大膽的舉動(天殺的對

  • Felix: Yeah, it kinda scares you

    好了,看看我們這邊有什麼

  • Felix: 3... 2... 1...

    喔我想我看到了會讓人興奮的東西

  • *le fabulous jump boi*

    你看了什麼(我不要說

  • Jack: Aaww Felix: Yeeeaah!!

    我不要說,Felix

  • Jack: Don't look at me

    我想要男生的玩具(男生的玩具?

  • Felix: How do I look like? *ur a bat pewds*

    禿頭玩具也行(禿頭玩具?

  • Jack: Uhh, so fucking weird.

    很適合你的鬍子

  • Felix: *im scared*

    閉嘴!!!!(我有這個

  • Jack: Come close to the camera

    什麼(別擔心,jacksepticeye

  • Felix: *hisses*

    我有扭瓶蓋器

  • Felix: I can't see anything

    我的天啊!!!!!!

  • Jack: Okay too close, too close, you're good.

    這可以轉開所有東西

  • Jack: Oh my God

    我突然發現這可能需要電池(我好期待這個

  • Felix: I can't even see myself in-

    這會不會是像一個只會嗡嗡叫然後從上方卡住蓋子

  • Felix: OH MY GOOOOOOD!

    然後你可以扭它

  • Felix: Your outfit

    我們打開後就知道了(看來我們需要另一個扭轉器去打開箱子

  • Jack: Really nice

    好了,你準備好了嗎

  • Felix: Very nice

    喔喔!!!!

  • Jack: Very nice, very flowy.

    冷靜,扭轉機(別再扭了扭轉機

  • Felix: Very nice! *handok.mp3*

    這停不下來

  • Felix: I like it, jak sie masz.

    這該死的垃圾機器

  • Felix: When you put it on was remembering, when I was 5 at kindergarten

    (鬼叫)

  • Felix: I played Peter Pan

    這要怎麼用啊!!!!(我不知道

  • Jack: Ooh

    耶。喔

  • Felix: Yeah, and I had the exactly that outfit

    扭轉機(扭轉機!!!!!

  • Felix: But it was borrowed

    扭轉機,扭轉機

  • Felix: so I was like, well it's not mine so should I.. remove my underwear?

  • Jack: WHAT?

    喔!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Felix: I don't know I was like, that's kinda gross.

    我幾乎預期這整個東西會被打碎

  • Jack: It's more gross when you have no underwear!

    這停不下來(它就是想要繼續運作

  • Felix: I was a kid okay?!

    這東西就是一直扭

  • Felix: So I went naked out on stage with it.

    奶頭扭轉!!!!!!

  • Jack: Wait, like this?

    那真是太棒了(什麼東西能打敗它

  • Felix: Yes!

    什麼能打敗扭轉機

  • Jack: Oooh, bold move.

    我已經想用這個很久了

  • Felix: Hell yeah!

    因為我們有超配的穿著

  • Felix: Alright. Let's see what we have here.

    太好了(我們來玩這個~atomatons

  • Jack: Think I saw something in there, I'm excited.

    這就是我剛剛在盒子裡看到的,我真他媽的開心

  • Felix: What did you see?

    這可能需要電池(這個也需要電池?

  • Jack: I'm not telling.

    去你的,jackspeticeye

  • Jack: I'm not telling, Felix. I want board game!

    我可以自己玩

  • Felix: Boi game?

    你在詛咒我嗎(沒有 婊子

  • Jack: Board game... But yeah, sure. You have fluff on your beard.

    他是個婊子

  • Felix: Shut up!

    用這個刺你,天殺的

  • Jack: *mumbles* Wish I had wings...

    所以有什麼比兩個聒噪的youtuber更吵

  • Jack: What?

    這就像我在看一本有聲書

  • Felix: Don't you worry, Jackspedicey 5!

    我的天啊停下來天殺的

  • Felix: I got the Robo Twist!

    我們需要一起彈一些東西

  • Jack: OH MY GOOOOOOD!

    我不知道(喔那很干擾人

  • Felix: It can twist anything!

    那是我從薩爾達中學來的某些東西

  • Felix: It probably needs batteries, I just realised.

    再彈一次

  • Jack: I'm excited for this one.

    (詭異音樂)

  • Jack: If only there was like a drone that like flew down on to it, then you could twist

    你難道是瑞典最厲害的管弦樂家嗎

  • Felix: There would be no effort whatsoever

    那就是我謝謝

  • Jack: If only we had another Robo Twist to get the box open!

    他們是如此他媽的可愛

  • Felix: Alright, you ready?

    (拜託停下來)

  • Both: Whoa whoa whoa!

    不可能他媽會有更好的了

  • Jack: Calm down, Robo Twist!

    喔靠我突然發現我有一個翅膀什麼的

  • Felix: Stop twisting, Robo Twist!

    jack你喜歡閱讀嗎

  • Felix: It's no stop

    恩,不喜歡

  • Felix: oogh-

    好的,我有東西要給你(哇,懶人閱讀器)

  • Jack: Fucking machines. You can't trust them.

    對,懶人閱讀器

  • Felix: Alright. AAAH!

    懶人閱讀器是三小(它是玻璃眼鏡嗎

  • Jack: AAHH!

    對他是玻璃眼鏡

  • Jack: Carefully. Both: *scream*

    它很搭你的穿著

  • Felix: How does it work?

    我的天啊這真的好奇怪

  • Jack: I don't know

    我像是在看著我自己的腳走路

  • Felix: Yeah! Jack: Oh!

    嘿(喂我在走路

  • Felix: YEAH. Jack: Robo Twist!

    我看到了

  • Felix: ROBO TWISTTT

    等等,我要秀給你們看

  • Both: ROBO TWIST Felix: ROBO TWIST

    我看的到你他媽的眼睛

  • Both: ROBO TWIST ROBO TWIST- oh

    你看得到我嗎孩子(我不知道看不看得到

  • Felix: OHHH

    喔可以可以

  • Both: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH

    那真的好奇怪

  • Jack: I was almost expecting this whole thing to shatter in our hands-

    喔我就好像在玩電動遊戲(那真的好清楚

  • *Both laugh*

    我看我的下面也很清楚那很好

  • Felix: It's not stopping

    喔該死的讚(我懂了!!我懂了!!!

  • Jack: It just want to keep on twisting. Felix: It just wants to keep on- *laughs*

    這真是太棒了

  • Jack: It's just gonna crush it..

    我的天啊

  • Felix: AAAAHHHH

    這就是我為什麼買它

  • Jack: NIPPLE TWIST!

    它有很糟的評價

  • Jack: That was amazing!

    別再那樣做了,真的他媽的很詭異(喔該死的

  • Felix: What could possibly beat that item? *Both laugh*

    喔!!喔!!!!

  • Jack: What beats Robo Twist?

    該死的讚

  • Felix: I've been wanting to use these, for a long time

    那真的他媽的很酷

  • Felix: Since we have matching outfits and all...

    好的傳過去,你準備好要傳過去了嗎

  • Jack: Yess!

    喔現在我們只是在握手而已

  • Felix: ...We get matching, uhh... Both: Otamatones!

    你準備好要傳了嗎

  • Jack: That's what I saw in the box and I'm so fucking happy.

    我接到了接到了!!!!!

  • Jack: Except we might need batteries for these as well

    最後的物品

  • Felix: You need batteries for these as well?

    jack,你準備好了嗎(是的

  • Jack: Yeah

    『愛上這個,徹底改變人生的胸罩』

  • Felix: *whispers* Fuck Jacksepticeye.

    改變人生喔太好了(我們就是得看看

  • Felix: I can play myself..

    這是真的胸罩嗎(對我不知道你的尺寸

  • Jack: You cursing me out?

    這是A罩杯的

  • Felix: No.

    對這應該很合適

  • Jack: Bitch.

    喔不

  • Felix: *whispers* He's a bitch.

    喔耶

  • Jack: Stab you

    好的這只是變得非常gay

  • Felix: *chuckles* Jesus Christ

    pewdiepie的頻道,2017

  • Felix: So what's more annoying than two loud-ass Youtubers?

    你需要幫忙嗎

  • *Otamatones make high-pitched whining sounds*

    你看起來像個夏威夷女孩之類的(笑

  • *Otamatones make high-pitched whining sounds*

    這是我的椰子(好的那是

  • Jack: It's like I'm looking into an audio mirror.

    這是youtube噪音比賽2017

  • *Otamatone makes a very high-pitched sound*

    按個讚並且去看看jack如果你還沒有的話

  • Felix: Oh my God, stop. Jesus Christ.

    而且永遠

  • Jack: *laughs*

    姊妹拳

  • Felix: We have to play something together. Jack: Wait.

    當數千個jackspeticeye聚在一起時聽起來會是怎樣

  • *Otamatones make sounds*

    是darude sandstorm!!(一首歌)

  • Jack: I don't know

    顯然我們忘記怎麼彈了

  • Felix: That was jammin'

    喔那是對的音調(對

  • Jack: There was- no, there was a was a Zelda-thing I learned

    那還不錯

  • *Otamatone makes a tune*

    我們會做到的

  • Felix: What the fuck is that?

  • Jack: Duu, du du du dududuuu Felix: Oooh! Both: *laugh*

  • Felix: Do it again

  • *meme music 101 plays*

  • Jack: Aren't you Sweden's number one orchestra player?

  • Felix: That I- that I am, thank you!

  • *Otamatones make high-pitched sounds*

  • Jack: They're so fucking cute though.

  • *Otamatones make sounds*

  • *Otamatones make a very high-pitched sound*

  • *Otamatones high pitched sound intensifies*

  • *Both laugh*

  • Felix: What could possibly be better- oh shit I realised I have fucking wings and shit!

  • Felix: AH! SHI-

  • Both: *laugh*

  • Felix: Jack, do you like reading?

  • Jack: uhm.

  • Jack: no.

  • Felix: Well, I have something for you!

  • Jack: Whoa! The Lazy Readers?

  • Felix: -The Lazy Readers!

  • Jack: What the fuck are the Lazy Readers? *giggles*

  • Jack: Are they mirror glasses?

  • Felix: They are mirror glasses, BOI.

  • Jack: OOH.

  • Felix: They match your outfit *laughs*

  • Jack: Oh my God, that's so weird- I'm like walking and looking at my own feet.

  • *Both laugh*

  • Felix: Hey whaddup, BOI?!

  • Jack: Oh Jesus Christ!

  • Both: *laugh*

  • Felix: I see- *laughs*

  • Jack: Can you see-

  • Felix: Wait, wait, I gotta show you... Can you see your fucking eyes?

  • *Both laugh*

  • Jack: Can you see me, boi?

  • Jack: I don't know if you can see cos of the lights

  • Felix: It's probably- OH I see, I see, yeah!

  • Both: *laugh*

  • Jack: Those are so weird

  • Felix: Whoa, it's like I'm playing a video game. Jack: And- They're so clear as well.

  • Felix: I see my knob as well. That's great.

  • Felix: Oh hell yeah, I get it!

  • Jack: Yeah! *laughs*

  • Felix: I get it! This is awesome!

  • Both: *laugh*

  • Felix: Wait, where are you?

  • Both: *laugh*

  • Jack: Ooh my God

  • Felix: This one I bought... it had bad reviews-

  • Felix: *laughs* Stop doing that, it's so fucking creepy.

  • Felix: Oh shit- WOAH. WOAH.

  • Jack: Woahh-

  • Felix: WOAH.

  • Felix: Hell yeh!

  • Jack: ..You've wings though so it doens't work-

  • Jack: That's really fucking cool!

  • Felix: AAH

  • Felix: Alright, pass it along-

  • Felix: -You ready for the pass-along?

  • Jack: *mutters* ah yeh, fucking-

  • Both: *laugh*

  • Jack: Now we're just holding hands!

  • Felix: You ready for the pass-along?

  • Both: WHOOOOAAAAH!

  • Felix: Back at it again! Jack: With the white vaaaa-

  • Felix: AAAAAAAAH!

  • Felix: The last item...

  • Jack: *mumbles* That's fuckin' cool.

  • Felix: The last item, Jack. Are you ready?

  • Jack: I am.

  • Jack: Love this, totally life-changing bra.

  • Felix: Life-changing bra. Well, we just gonna have to see about that.

  • Jack: This is an actual bra?

  • Felix: Yeah, I didn't know your size..

  • Felix: I went with an A-cup.