...for another time.

如你所見我又換工作室了...又一次

I'm in this new space, it's pretty cool. It's my own space.

這是一個新的空間，非常酷，是我自己的天地

It's definitely my... *laughs*

我在這個新空間，感覺很酷，這是我自己的空間

pahla-a-a

這絕對是我的...（笑

Y O U P I C K E D T H E W R O N G H O U S E F O O O O O O O O O O O O

地方

Jack: This is mine. My padded cell Felix: I knew you were insane

你選錯房子了傻子！！！！！

Felix: I knew you were one of those people with that-

這是我的 ，我的軟墊天花板

Felix: *claps* We're going to do Five Weird Stuff Online

我知道你瘋了，就像那些人一樣

Felix: With Jackspedicey.

我們今天的主題是網路上的五樣怪東西

(music plays)

跟jacksepticeye (綠色版的pewdiepie)

Felix: Item Number One. Jack: What are you going to start with?

第一件物品 你要從哪個開始（我不知道

Felix: I don't know. Both: *lame laugh*

就從這個最大的 我從網路上買來的這一大坨鬼東西

Felix: Let's go with the biggest. I have this bag of a bunch of shit I bought online.

我的天 聖誕老公公

Jack: Oh my God, Santa-sama

就從一些沒說服力但我想試試看的東西

Felix: Okay, let's start with something lame, but I kind of want to try it out.

這是啥

Jack: What's it called? AIRZOOKA? Felix: Yeaaah!

空氣砲!!!!!!!!!!(耶!!!!!!

Jack: It's like twice the size of that kid.

那個玩具看起來比小孩大兩倍（笑

Felix: I feel like the scale is not...

我覺得那個尺寸不是...

Jack: Perspective? Felix: Look at that

只是目測的

Jack: *laughs* Felix: Heh

(笑)

Felix: So this is an bazooka

所以這是一個火箭筒

Felix: Seems like too much effort to put together.

噢，這看起來組裝好會很麻煩

Jack: No, it looks cool!

不這看起來很酷

Jack: The fuck is all this?

這看起來就像什麼他媽洛克會用的

Jack: Looks like something fucking Megaman uses

這其實真的是

Felix: It does yeah, actually

你準備好要接受空氣砲了嗎

Felix: Maybe I should read the instructions Jack: *laughs*

你在幹嘛（我在充氣

Felix: Are you ready to get airzooked? (screaming)

你準備好要接受空氣砲了嗎兄弟

Felix: What are you doing?

不，你應該要這樣拿

Jack: I'm- I'm zooking ;)

我知道啊

Jack: ..Bazinga.

噢糟糕，好了我懂了

Felix: BAZINGA

要多近（我不知道！！！！！

Felix: Are you ready to get airzookad, bruuh?

呀你怕了啊

Jack: No-

你之前有這樣捉弄過我

Jack: You have to pull like this

看看他的蠢臉

Felix: I knew that Jack: *giggles*

喔我的天啊（會痛嗎

Felix: Oh shit, okay, I get it

喔靠

Felix: How close?

空氣砲！！！！！！

Jack: I don't know.

不！！！！！！

Both: *laugh* Felix: You scared now, boy?

好了，打我吧兄弟（我準備好了

Felix: You were making fun of it before!

你眨眼。 就輸了

Felix: I can see your stupid face through here as well.

這東西他媽的爛

F L O O P

喔！！！！！空氣砲！！！！！

Jack: Oh my God! *laughs*

感謝天這裡有遮蓋物

Felix: Was it bad?

你是真的把它弄壞了嗎（沒拉，喔對

Jack: Just POW!!!

喔它還是運作得很好

Felix: *breaks airzooka* OH, SHIT!

天殺的

Both: AIRZOOKA?! *rip*

它的聲音像打雷一樣

Felix: NOOO!

對會嚇到人

Jack: Okay

3,2,1

Felix: Hit me, bro

喔天啊看看我（我看起來怎麼樣

Felix: I'm ready *mad pewds*

真他媽的奇怪

Jack: Ya ready, boi?

往前去看鏡頭

Jack: *imitates Felix* You blink,

我啥都看不到（喔太近了太近了

y o u l o s e.

喔我的天啊（我甚至連自己都看不到

(airzookafail.mp3)

我的天啊！！！！！！

Both: *giggle*

你的衣服（非常好！！

Jack: This thing fucking sucks ;)

很好（非常好，非常

*Jack blows air towards Felix*

非常好，看起來像

Felix: A A A A H H H H

我記得我五歲時

Jack: AIRZOOKA!

幼稚園時，我演彼得潘

Felix: Thank God there was cover here

對，而且我真的有那套衣服

Felix: Did you break it for real?

但那是借來的，所以我就想，喔那不是我的

Jack: No the- ohh yeah.

所以，我應該脫掉我的內褲嗎

*rip jack again*

什麼！？（我不知道，其實那還蠻噁心的

Both: *laugh* Jack: That works really well.

那超噁心的啊

Felix: Do it..

我不知道，我那時還只是小孩好嗎

Both: *Laugh*

所以我就像這樣全裸上台

Felix: Jesus-

像這樣！？（對呀

Jack: It's the sound as well

喔，大膽的舉動（天殺的對

Felix: Yeah, it kinda scares you

好了，看看我們這邊有什麼

Felix: 3... 2... 1...

喔我想我看到了會讓人興奮的東西

*le fabulous jump boi*

你看了什麼（我不要說

Jack: Aaww Felix: Yeeeaah!!

我不要說，Felix

Jack: Don't look at me

我想要男生的玩具（男生的玩具？

Felix: How do I look like? *ur a bat pewds*

禿頭玩具也行（禿頭玩具？

Jack: Uhh, so fucking weird.

很適合你的鬍子

Felix: *im scared*

閉嘴！！！！（我有這個

Jack: Come close to the camera

什麼（別擔心，jacksepticeye

Felix: *hisses*

我有扭瓶蓋器

Felix: I can't see anything

我的天啊！！！！！！

Jack: Okay too close, too close, you're good.

這可以轉開所有東西

Jack: Oh my God

我突然發現這可能需要電池（我好期待這個

Felix: I can't even see myself in-

這會不會是像一個只會嗡嗡叫然後從上方卡住蓋子

Felix: OH MY GOOOOOOD!

然後你可以扭它

Felix: Your outfit

我們打開後就知道了（看來我們需要另一個扭轉器去打開箱子

Jack: Really nice

好了，你準備好了嗎

Felix: Very nice

喔喔！！！！

Jack: Very nice, very flowy.

冷靜，扭轉機（別再扭了扭轉機

Felix: Very nice! *handok.mp3*

這停不下來

Felix: I like it, jak sie masz.

這該死的垃圾機器

Felix: When you put it on was remembering, when I was 5 at kindergarten

（鬼叫）

Felix: I played Peter Pan

這要怎麼用啊！！！！（我不知道

Jack: Ooh

耶。喔

Felix: Yeah, and I had the exactly that outfit

扭轉機（扭轉機！！！！！

Felix: But it was borrowed

扭轉機，扭轉機

Felix: so I was like, well it's not mine so should I.. remove my underwear?

喔

Jack: WHAT?

喔！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

Felix: I don't know I was like, that's kinda gross.

我幾乎預期這整個東西會被打碎

Jack: It's more gross when you have no underwear!

這停不下來（它就是想要繼續運作

Felix: I was a kid okay?!

這東西就是一直扭

Felix: So I went naked out on stage with it.

奶頭扭轉！！！！！！

Jack: Wait, like this?

那真是太棒了（什麼東西能打敗它

Felix: Yes!

什麼能打敗扭轉機

Jack: Oooh, bold move.

我已經想用這個很久了

Felix: Hell yeah!

因為我們有超配的穿著

Felix: Alright. Let's see what we have here.

太好了（我們來玩這個～atomatons

Jack: Think I saw something in there, I'm excited.

這就是我剛剛在盒子裡看到的，我真他媽的開心

Felix: What did you see?

這可能需要電池（這個也需要電池？

Jack: I'm not telling.

去你的，jackspeticeye

Jack: I'm not telling, Felix. I want board game!

我可以自己玩

Felix: Boi game?

你在詛咒我嗎（沒有 婊子

Jack: Board game... But yeah, sure. You have fluff on your beard.

他是個婊子

Felix: Shut up!

用這個刺你，天殺的

Jack: *mumbles* Wish I had wings...

所以有什麼比兩個聒噪的youtuber更吵

Jack: What?

這就像我在看一本有聲書

Felix: Don't you worry, Jackspedicey 5!

我的天啊停下來天殺的

Felix: I got the Robo Twist!

我們需要一起彈一些東西

Jack: OH MY GOOOOOOD!

我不知道（喔那很干擾人

Felix: It can twist anything!

那是我從薩爾達中學來的某些東西

Felix: It probably needs batteries, I just realised.

再彈一次

Jack: I'm excited for this one.

（詭異音樂）

Jack: If only there was like a drone that like flew down on to it, then you could twist

你難道是瑞典最厲害的管弦樂家嗎

Felix: There would be no effort whatsoever

那就是我謝謝

Jack: If only we had another Robo Twist to get the box open!

他們是如此他媽的可愛

Felix: Alright, you ready?

（拜託停下來）

Both: Whoa whoa whoa!

不可能他媽會有更好的了

Jack: Calm down, Robo Twist!

喔靠我突然發現我有一個翅膀什麼的

Felix: Stop twisting, Robo Twist!

jack你喜歡閱讀嗎

Felix: It's no stop

恩，不喜歡

Felix: oogh-

好的，我有東西要給你（哇，懶人閱讀器）

Jack: Fucking machines. You can't trust them.

對，懶人閱讀器

Felix: Alright. AAAH!

懶人閱讀器是三小（它是玻璃眼鏡嗎

Jack: AAHH!

對他是玻璃眼鏡

Jack: Carefully. Both: *scream*

它很搭你的穿著

Felix: How does it work?

我的天啊這真的好奇怪

Jack: I don't know

我像是在看著我自己的腳走路

Felix: Yeah! Jack: Oh!

嘿（喂我在走路

Felix: YEAH. Jack: Robo Twist!

我看到了

Felix: ROBO TWISTTT

等等，我要秀給你們看

Both: ROBO TWIST Felix: ROBO TWIST

我看的到你他媽的眼睛

Both: ROBO TWIST ROBO TWIST- oh

你看得到我嗎孩子（我不知道看不看得到

Felix: OHHH

喔可以可以

Both: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH

那真的好奇怪

Jack: I was almost expecting this whole thing to shatter in our hands-

喔我就好像在玩電動遊戲（那真的好清楚

*Both laugh*

我看我的下面也很清楚那很好

Felix: It's not stopping

喔該死的讚（我懂了！！我懂了！！！

Jack: It just want to keep on twisting. Felix: It just wants to keep on- *laughs*

這真是太棒了

Jack: It's just gonna crush it..

我的天啊

Felix: AAAAHHHH

這就是我為什麼買它

Jack: NIPPLE TWIST!

它有很糟的評價

Jack: That was amazing!

別再那樣做了，真的他媽的很詭異（喔該死的

Felix: What could possibly beat that item? *Both laugh*

喔！！喔！！！！

Jack: What beats Robo Twist?

該死的讚

Felix: I've been wanting to use these, for a long time

那真的他媽的很酷

Felix: Since we have matching outfits and all...

好的傳過去，你準備好要傳過去了嗎

Jack: Yess!

喔現在我們只是在握手而已

Felix: ...We get matching, uhh... Both: Otamatones!

你準備好要傳了嗎

Jack: That's what I saw in the box and I'm so fucking happy.

我接到了接到了！！！！！

Jack: Except we might need batteries for these as well

最後的物品

Felix: You need batteries for these as well?

jack，你準備好了嗎（是的

Jack: Yeah

『愛上這個，徹底改變人生的胸罩』

Felix: *whispers* Fuck Jacksepticeye.

改變人生喔太好了（我們就是得看看

Felix: I can play myself..

這是真的胸罩嗎（對我不知道你的尺寸

Jack: You cursing me out?

這是A罩杯的

Felix: No.

對這應該很合適

Jack: Bitch.

喔不

Felix: *whispers* He's a bitch.

喔耶

Jack: Stab you

好的這只是變得非常gay

Felix: *chuckles* Jesus Christ

pewdiepie的頻道，2017

Felix: So what's more annoying than two loud-ass Youtubers?

你需要幫忙嗎

*Otamatones make high-pitched whining sounds*

你看起來像個夏威夷女孩之類的（笑

*Otamatones make high-pitched whining sounds*

這是我的椰子（好的那是

Jack: It's like I'm looking into an audio mirror.

這是youtube噪音比賽2017

*Otamatone makes a very high-pitched sound*

按個讚並且去看看jack如果你還沒有的話

Felix: Oh my God, stop. Jesus Christ.

而且永遠

Jack: *laughs*

姊妹拳

Felix: We have to play something together. Jack: Wait.

當數千個jackspeticeye聚在一起時聽起來會是怎樣

*Otamatones make sounds*

是darude sandstorm!!(一首歌)

Jack: I don't know

顯然我們忘記怎麼彈了

Felix: That was jammin'

喔那是對的音調（對

Jack: There was- no, there was a was a Zelda-thing I learned

那還不錯

*Otamatone makes a tune*

我們會做到的

Felix: What the fuck is that?

Jack: Duu, du du du dududuuu Felix: Oooh! Both: *laugh*

Felix: Do it again

*meme music 101 plays*

Jack: Aren't you Sweden's number one orchestra player?

Felix: That I- that I am, thank you!

*Otamatones make high-pitched sounds*

Jack: They're so fucking cute though.

*Otamatones make sounds*

*Otamatones make a very high-pitched sound*

*Otamatones high pitched sound intensifies*

*Both laugh*

Felix: What could possibly be better- oh shit I realised I have fucking wings and shit!

Felix: AH! SHI-

Both: *laugh*

Felix: Jack, do you like reading?

Jack: uhm.

Jack: no.

Felix: Well, I have something for you!

Jack: Whoa! The Lazy Readers?

Felix: -The Lazy Readers!

Jack: What the fuck are the Lazy Readers? *giggles*

Jack: Are they mirror glasses?

Felix: They are mirror glasses, BOI.

Jack: OOH.

Felix: They match your outfit *laughs*

Jack: Oh my God, that's so weird- I'm like walking and looking at my own feet.

*Both laugh*

Felix: Hey whaddup, BOI?!

Jack: Oh Jesus Christ!

Both: *laugh*

Felix: I see- *laughs*

Jack: Can you see-

Felix: Wait, wait, I gotta show you... Can you see your fucking eyes?

*Both laugh*

Jack: Can you see me, boi?

Jack: I don't know if you can see cos of the lights

Felix: It's probably- OH I see, I see, yeah!

Both: *laugh*

Jack: Those are so weird

Felix: Whoa, it's like I'm playing a video game. Jack: And- They're so clear as well.

Felix: I see my knob as well. That's great.

Felix: Oh hell yeah, I get it!

Jack: Yeah! *laughs*

Felix: I get it! This is awesome!

Both: *laugh*

Felix: Wait, where are you?

Both: *laugh*

Jack: Ooh my God

Felix: This one I bought... it had bad reviews-

Felix: *laughs* Stop doing that, it's so fucking creepy.

Felix: Oh shit- WOAH. WOAH.

Jack: Woahh-

Felix: WOAH.

Felix: Hell yeh!

Jack: ..You've wings though so it doens't work-

Jack: That's really fucking cool!

Felix: AAH

Felix: Alright, pass it along-

Felix: -You ready for the pass-along?

Jack: *mutters* ah yeh, fucking-

Both: *laugh*

Jack: Now we're just holding hands!

Felix: You ready for the pass-along?

Both: WHOOOOAAAAH!

Felix: Back at it again! Jack: With the white vaaaa-

Felix: AAAAAAAAH!

Felix: The last item...

Jack: *mumbles* That's fuckin' cool.

Felix: The last item, Jack. Are you ready?

Jack: I am.

Jack: Love this, totally life-changing bra.

Felix: Life-changing bra. Well, we just gonna have to see about that.

Jack: This is an actual bra?

Felix: Yeah, I didn't know your size..

Felix: I went with an A-cup.

Jack: Yeah, that's- that's probably accurate.

Felix: Eww

Felix: Ahh no.

Felix: Ohh... Jack: Oh nice.

Felix: Ooohohhoho

Felix: Oooh yeah!

Felix: Well, this just.. became really gay.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Jack: PooDiePie channel 2017.

Felix: Do you need help with that?

Felix: You look like uhh, like a hawaiian girl or something.