Oh, I don't know

Um, ahem, how about the fact

that the underwear out there on the telephone pole is yours

from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby

out on the terrace.

- What? - What?

Wait a minute, who told you?

You are dead meat.

I didn't know it was a big secret.

Huh, oh, it's not big, not at all.

You know, kind of on the same lines as, say

oh, I don't know, having a third nipple!

[gasping]

(Ross) 'What?'

You have a third nipple?

You bitch.

- Whip it out. Whip it out. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No! Come on!

There's nothing to see. It's just a tiny bump.

It's totally useless.

Oh, as-as opposed to your other

multifunctional nipples.

I can't believe you.

You told me it was a nubbin.

Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?

I don't know. You see something. You hear a word.

I thought that's what it was.

- Let me see it again. - Yeah, show it to us.

Show us the nubbin. Your nubbin.

Joey was in a porno movie.

[gasping]

If I'm going down, I'm taking everybody with me.

- Oh, my God! - You were in a porno?

A-a-alright, alright, alright.

I was young, and I just wanted a job, okay?

But at the last minute I couldn't go through with it.

So they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier

but can't, 'cause there's people having sex on it.

(together) Wow!

That is wild!

[chuckling]

So what's it shaped like?

Yeah, is there a hair on it?

What happens if you flick it?

[instrumental music]

So, uh, does it do anything, you know, special?

Well, yes, Ross, pressing my third nipple

opens the delivery entrance

to the magical land of Narnia.

You know, in some cultures having a third nipple

is actually a sign of virility.

You get the best huts

and women dance naked around you.

Ha, are, uh, any of these cultures

perchance in the Tri-state area?

You know, you are so amazing.

Is there anything you-you don't know?

[laughs]