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-Here's our favorite jokes of the week.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Senator Bernie Sanders
also endorsed Joe Biden for president yesterday
during a joint livestream, and lookin' at those guys,
I'm guessin' they each had to get up and livestream
five or six more times that night.
The Tour de France has been postponed
due to the coronavirus.
Well, of course it has. I mean,
things haven't been this abundantly clear
since they invented bike shorts.
President Trump said over the weekend that his decision
to re-open the country and economy would be the,
"toughest decision that he will ever make."
And that's coming from a guy who once had to fire Meat Loaf.
Couldn't have been easy for Trump to
fire a guy named after food.
The reality dating show spin-off
"The Bachelor: Listen to Your Heart" premiered this week
and features 20 single musicians living in a mansion.
20 single musicians living together.
Are they trying to distract us from the virus
or create an even stronger one?
According to reports, President Trump threatened to
veto the $2 trillion coronavirus economic package
if it bailed out the postal service.
Oh, my God, would you just,
I don't know put him on a stamp or something?
Tell him it's for the postal service's ode to hotties.
[ As Trump ] Oh, yeah.
No, in that case give them whatever they need.