So it is Thursday, the day that I am supposed to upload a video.

But I am running so behind this week, and I kind of just wanted to catch up with you guys as to why only I really hate it when you tubers like make these update.

Video is just basically like complaining mother lives.

But there were a couple things I want to address in this video.

Mostly, the reason why I don't have a video out this week is that things have just been really crazy recently.

Last week was final Speak at U.

C.

L.

A.

Normally I film in like the few hours that my roommate aren't home.

I haven't even asked their schedules over the period of the quarter.

I've been able to figure out when they consistently aren't home, but obviously, during finals week they were home studying.

There was a lot harder to film.

That's kind of something that I wanted to talk about in general is just how hard it is to try to film videos consistently when I don't have a space of my own.

I don't wanna complain too much, because obviously, YouTube is amazing job and my life is just infinitely better than it was when I was like working minimum wage at the dining hall's Till 3 a.m. But recently it has really been getting to me that I don't have my own space.

I feel like my entire schedule is just in the hands of chance because I'll plan my whole schedule around when I think I can shoot a video and then it's suddenly like my roommate has a change of plans at their home, where you only appearance is another thing.

I try to be like too superficial because obviously everybody has their good days and bad days, and I don't want to be like, fake in shit.

But it is kind of hard to film when, like your face is full of acne, because you've been really stressed out where my face gets, like, really puffy when I haven't had enough sleep.

And sometimes it can just be hard to film.

I try to be pretty genuine with you guys, and I don't think that I have, like a fake personality on camera like it's pretty much just me.

But to a certain extent, I do have to be like on.

I've gotten, like, three hours of sleep and I am dead tired and I'm not having it.

I'm not gonna be able to film with Rift Hall, and it's not gonna come out great.

I do have to kind of be like in the zone to talk about clothing coherently and not just be rambling and be able to make a couple jokes here in there.

Hopefully, that are kind of funny, maybe.

And another thing is like As my channel grows, I'm trying to put out better content for you guys.

I want every video to be better than the last, so I feel like I failed myself.

If I upload like a really shitty video, maybe like this one, that's a lot lower quality than my other ones, and I'm not.

It's funny if the lighting isn't as good.

If my cinematography and editing is in his own point as other videos, it really just like I'm really trying to push myself.

I want to be the best at everything, but it's hard to do that when I am also enrolled full time in school.

I don't even have my own space.

I'm also editing two videos a week for some other YouTubers.

But that is all to say.

This is still a fantastic job, and I'm still gonna be doing my best to get a video out every single week.

I've been really good at it so far this quarter.

I think I just needed this week to kind of refuel.

It's also my spring break, So I'm trying to hang out with my friends and family a lot.

I think this is gonna be one of the last times that I ever really come home back to Maryland because I'm staying in L.

A.

For the summer.

Speaking of the summer, though, I applied to a bunch of internships.

None of them have called me back at this point.

I kind of don't think that I'm gonna have an internship, but I'm actually kind of excited about that, because in the past I've always filled my summers with internships or classes or working at a restaurant or like the good old ice cream store here in Maryland.

But this summer I'm just gonna take for myself.

I'm moving into a new apartment so I'll have a whole room to myself.

He's really exciting and I think I might actually have the whole apartment to myself for a lot of the summer, too.

So I'm gonna have so much time and so much space to film.

I'm really excited.

I really want to take my YouTube channel seriously and make really good content for you guys, something that has also been on my mind.

It's actually something that I've wanted to make for around a year now is a Web series.

I started writing it, but I haven't gotten that far yet.

But basically it's about like, tinder struggles.

I wanted to be called Swipe right, and it's gonna be about this girl who's just gotten into college going on her first tinder dates.

I know that this is obviously a fashion YouTube channel, so that's a little bit off brand.

But I feel like a lot of you guys are also here for my sense of humor and maybe my filmmaking abilities.

Even though you haven't seen that much of it yet, let me know if that would be something you guys would be interested in.

It would be such a cool project to take on during the summer, so yeah, basically, during the summer.

That will be you to being a full time, I guess.

Which is crazy to say, I don't know Jesus, but I feel like this is like the leap of faith I need.

I've been taking you to pretty seriously now for a while, but I just want to really commit myself for it and will be a good test run as well and graduating college next year.

So I don't know if I wanted to YouTube forever.

But if I really enjoyed myself this summer, it might be something that I can really dedicate myself to after I graduate.

As you guys know, I'm also in film school, though, and I do really want to be a writer with a TV writer or a showrunner.

That would be so cool.

So that's something I'm also working on.

I feel like when I'm 40 that's what I want to be.

I don't know.

It's weird because, like that and YouTube are to really separate worlds.

But that's why I was thinking of doing a Web series because I'd be able to combine my writing and my YouTube channel and like film school production East stuff.

So yeah, let me know what you guys would think about that.

Otherwise, I'm just gonna be turning out so much content that summer.

I'm so excited.

So again, Sorry, I don't have, like, a real video for this week.

I absolutely hate being a flake, but I really did just need this week to kind of just like untended, a little bit turned into a little bit of a pile of mush.

I'll be back next week with more videos for you guys, so I'll see you then.