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  • Before we get into the latest headlines,

  • let's kick it off with some good news

  • in our brand-new segment, Ray of Sunshine.

  • (triumphant music playing)

  • All right, first up is news out of India.

  • So many people in India are quarantined in their homes

  • that, for the first time in a long time,

  • you can actually see the real color of the sky.

  • And this has happened in some of the most heavily polluted areas

  • of New Delhi, where there was just smog every single day.

  • And one of the images that's been going viral is this one

  • that came out of New Delhi,

  • which shows the before and after

  • of 1.3 billion people staying at home.

  • And that's amazing, right? Just look at how beautiful

  • New Delhi is without any pollution.

  • It looks like the entire city went on Queer Eye.

  • "You've been hiding yourself under so many layers of smog.

  • You've got to let yourself shine, girl."

  • I mean, goddamn,

  • those are some blue skies.

  • I bet India probably even forgot

  • there was a time when skies weren't gray.

  • It's the same way America forgot there was a time

  • when presidents weren't orange. Yeah.

  • They used to be brown.

  • And it's not just the environment.

  • With humans locked away,

  • animals are also starting to flourish.

  • Here's some good news coming out of Hong Kong.

  • A zoo, which has been trying unsuccessfully

  • to get its pandas to mate for ten years,

  • reported that finally, yesterday,

  • the pandas spontaneously started having sex.

  • And the researchers say

  • they think it's because nobody is at the zoo.

  • And I'm like, "Yeah, I don't need to be a researcher

  • to know that that's what's happening."

  • Of course the pandas are having sex now that nobody's there.

  • How do you think you would react if, every day,

  • hundreds of people came to your bedroom window, like,

  • "Come on! Have sex! Do it!

  • "Come on. Have sex. Do it. Do--

  • Put it in!"

  • So I don't blame the pandas.

  • I mean, like, even when I have one person watching me

  • during sex, I'm like, "Hey, can you...

  • "can you look the other way? I'm-I'm just getting--

  • "Yeah, I'm just real self-conscious--

  • "Would you mind looking-- Look the other way.

  • It's-it's a lot of pressure."

  • This just makes you realize that,

  • when we're telling our grandkids about coronavirus

  • years from now, the animals are gonna be telling

  • a completely different story.

  • "Grandma, tell us about the coronavirus."

  • "Oh, little ones,

  • "it was a wonderful time.

  • "There were no humans,

  • and your grandpa was smashing me like there was no tomorrow."

  • So, good news for those pandas.

  • Although the bad news is,

  • now that nobody's watching,

  • the monkeys have all stopped having sex.

  • Those guys are freaky.

  • Now, please, don't get me wrong.

  • Corona's also bringing out some of the best in humanity.

  • Lifting spirits during this tough time is a real superhero.

  • Batman is hitting the streets of San Diego.

  • REPORTER: By day, Chris Banner runs a lawn service,

  • helping cut weeds and fire lines on people's property.

  • But when duty calls...

  • -♪ ♪ -...he suits up.

  • He's got the Batsuit and he's got the wheels,

  • a replica 1989 Batmobile that he and a friend built.

  • Normally, Chris gets paid to make appearances

  • at birthday parties and other special occasions.

  • But while the pandemic goes on,

  • he decided to just hit the road and make people smile.

  • Aw! That is such a sweet idea, man.

  • That guy's a hero.

  • I just hope he never started talking like Batman,

  • 'cause that would've freaked people out.

  • "Yeah, it's Batman!"

  • (hoarsely): "That's right, kids. It's me."

  • "Whoa. Is that coronavirus?

  • Get away, dude! Get away!"

  • "No, this is-- this is just how I..."

  • "Well, this is not the time.

  • Just use your normal voice, man. What's wrong with you?"

  • (regular voice): "Yeah, you're right. I should..."

  • "Okay, go back to the other voice.

  • That one's not cool."

  • All right, that's it for the good news.

  • Let's catch up with some headlines.

  • Right now, the worldwide number of confirmed coronavirus cases

  • has now steadily climbed to 1.3 million people.

  • And while some countries are seeing progress,

  • other countries are preparing for the worst.

  • In fact, after facing criticism

  • for his response to the pandemic,

  • Prime Minister Abe Shinzo has now declared

  • a state of emergency.

  • And in Britain, Prime Minister Boris Johnson

  • has been moved to an intensive care unit

  • after his coronavirus symptoms worsened.

  • So now, because the UK doesn't have a line of succession

  • for when the prime minister is out of commission,

  • Johnson has deputized his foreign secretary

  • to fill in for him.

  • And I'm not gonna lie. I thank God that, in America,

  • the president doesn't just get to pick

  • whoever he wants to take over for him.

  • It's good that there's a line of succession,

  • 'cause who knows who Donald Trump would pick.

  • "While I'm in the hospital,

  • "Doc Antle can take over for me.

  • "He's like a Dr. Fauci

  • but he (bleep)s."

  • Oh, and speaking of President Trump,

  • while the U.S. is bracing for an explosion

  • of new coronavirus infections,

  • the White House is also bracing for more backlash.

  • You see, they haven't been listening

  • to coronavirus warnings

  • that they've been receiving for months.

  • Just today, Axios reported that Peter Navarro,

  • Trump's trade advisor, wrote a memo back in January

  • where he warned very accurately

  • that if America didn't take immediate action

  • to stop the coronavirus,

  • it would break out in the United States

  • and it would kill hundreds of thousands of people.

  • And on top of that, he also predicted

  • that it would destroy the economy.

  • So Trump got warnings from the HHS,

  • got warnings from his intelligence agencies

  • and even got warnings from his own economic advisors,

  • and he didn't heed any of those warnings.

  • Basically, if there's ever a warning,

  • Trump just will ignore it. Yeah.

  • Coronavirus. Check engine light.

  • I bet even choking hazards.

  • Half of Mike Pence's job

  • is just pulling Legos out of Trump's throat.

  • "It was a yellow piece,

  • so I thought it was a piece of cheese."

  • "I know, Mr. President. Easy mistake to make, sir."

  • Now, it turns out Trump has been ignoring so many warnings

  • that the Daily Show investigation team

  • managed to get some of Donald Trump's voice mails,

  • and... (inhales) it turns out

  • he was even ignoring warnings

  • from coronavirus itself.

  • (phone ringing)

  • (beep)

  • (beep)

  • (beep)

  • (beep)

  • Now, the big story today is voting.

  • It's how America picks its leaders

  • and its dancers with the stars.

  • And in the time of coronavirus,

  • voting has gone from being a boring civic duty

  • to a recipe for disaster.

  • Crowds of people

  • packed into a tight space together, sharing pens,

  • elderly poll workers.

  • It's a coronavirus all-you-can-eat buffet.

  • And that's all in addition to the usual dangers of voting,

  • you know, like getting your hand stuck in the ballot scanner.

  • That's, like, a thing that happens for real.

  • And it's because of that corona risk

  • that many states around the country have decided to postpone

  • their primary elections until later in the year.

  • But Wisconsin is not one of those states.

  • Because today,

  • they held their primary elections as scheduled,

  • which, as you can imagine, is a big problem.

  • Because not only were Wisconsinites forced

  • to choose between their health and civic duty,

  • but thanks to so many poll workers dropping out,

  • the number of voting sites were slashed across the state.

  • Yeah, especially in urban areas.

  • For example, the number of polling locations

  • in Milwaukee went from the usual 180

  • all the way down to just five.

  • Five polling sites for a city of 600,000 people.

  • And I'm sorry, guys. Those numbers just don't make sense.

  • 600,000 people divided by five?

  • That's like...

  • Like, we-we all know what that number is.

  • The point is, it's unfair to the voters.

  • And when Wisconsin opened its polling locations this morning,

  • you could immediately tell

  • that having the election today was a really bad idea.

  • CHUCK TODD: We turn now to Wisconsin,

  • where despite the state's stay-at-home order,

  • the primary is underway today.

  • And after a day of chaos and confusion surrounding the vote,

  • folks are now casting their ballots in person,

  • despite fears of spreading coronavirus.

  • And already, there have been long lines at polling places,

  • raising concerns about social distancing.

  • MAN: There are people lined up

  • around the side of the high school, around the corner,

  • through the parking lot, and then into the road and sidewalk

  • that extends beyond that school, as well.

  • Okay, seriously, this is just ridiculous.

  • People standing around the block,

  • huge numbers waiting to vote.

  • During coronavirus? This is ridiculous!

  • There are only two reasons

  • people should be waiting in line for hours around a block.

  • Either Baby Yoda is doing a meet-and-greet,

  • or you're buying a pair of sneakers

  • that are too nice to ever wear.

  • And so, you just put them in the back of your closet,

  • and you brag about having them,

  • but nobody ever knows if it's true or not.

  • That's what I do with my Jordan 5s.

  • Clearly, this is not the ideal way to run an election,

  • especially during a pandemic.

  • So, the obvious question is,

  • why didn't Wisconsin delay their primary

  • like all the other states did?

  • Well, you see, it turns out,

  • Wisconsin's Democratic governor, Tony Evers,

  • tried to delay the primary,

  • and he tried to make it easier for people to vote by mail.

  • But he was blocked by the Republican legislature.

  • Now that doesn't make sense. Right?

  • Voting by mail might sound like a weird idea,

  • but every state already allows it in some form.

  • And not only that.

  • Five states conduct their elections

  • entirely by mail.

  • So many experts right now are arguing

  • that the most responsible thing to do during coronavirus

  • is just have everybody mail in their votes.

  • Oh, and for my younger viewers,

  • mail is when you have, like, a message,

  • and you send it to someone on a... on a piece of paper.

  • It's, um... it's like a TikTok,

  • but in an envelope. Yeah.

  • Oh, and an envelope is like an app,

  • but you open it physically,

  • like, with your hands.

  • So, the big question is, why are many Republicans

  • in Wisconsin and around the country resisting efforts

  • to make it easier to vote?

  • Well, I mean, they're still giving their usual talking point

  • about trying to prevent voter fraud.

  • But recently, prominent Republican leaders

  • have been slipping up and telling the truth.

  • MAN: Donald Trump has said

  • -that if we voted by mail... -WOMAN: Yeah.

  • MAN: ...Republicans would never win again.

  • TRUMP: The things they had in there were crazy.

  • Uh, they had things, uh, levels of voting

  • that if you ever agreed to it,

  • you'd never have a Republican elected in this country again.

  • The speaker of the house

  • in the state of Georgia has said the same thing--

  • that you don't... they don't want more voter participation.

  • Okay, this is so insane, man.

  • These Republicans are afraid

  • that if more people get access to voting,

  • they're going to lose elections.

  • And so, instead of just coming up

  • with policies that are more popular,

  • they'd rather just make it harder to vote?

  • Basically, these Republicans believe in the free market

  • for everything, except themselves.

  • I mean, think about it. If someone was getting bad scores

  • at the Olympics, what would they do? Huh?

  • They'd probably try and work harder

  • and improve their routine. Yeah?

  • But if Republicans were in that situation,

  • they would just be like, "Why are you wasting your time?

  • "Just steal the judge's scorecards.

  • Problem solved."

  • I mean, for years people have suspected it,

  • but now Republicans are just saying it out loud.

  • "We don't want more people to vote,

  • because then we think we're gonna lose." Yeah.

  • I don't know why they're saying it out loud.

  • I mean, maybe it's coronavirus.

  • Maybe it's being quarantined indoors.

  • You lock people up inside for long enough,

  • and the truth comes out.

  • Oh, I'll tell you what I really think of your cooking, Melinda!

  • So, the battle around voting is shaping up

  • to be one that will not only affect the primaries

  • in the months to come, but also, potentially,

  • the general election in November.

  • Because coronavirus might go away in the summer,

  • but, just like pumpkin spice,

  • it could make a comeback in the fall.

  • And if some Republicans have their way

  • with how all Americans can or cannot vote,

  • then, best believe, those panda bears in Hong Kong

  • won't be the only ones getting screwed.

  • Well, that's our show for today.

  • Before we go, though, please remember

  • this is going to be a harrowing week for doctors,

  • nurses and first responders around the country.

  • And you can help them protect themselves

  • while they save lives.

  • We need to help them

  • get masks, gloves and gowns that they need.

  • So please go to Thrive Global's #FirstRespondersFirst

  • and donate whatever you can

  • to help get PPE to the people saving our lives.

  • And if you want to help in New York City specifically,

  • please then go to the New York Mayor's Fund

  • COVID-19 response, and you can help them out.

  • Stay safe out there.

  • Wash your hands,

  • remember to wipe from front to back, not side to side,

  • and I'll see you again tomorrow.

Before we get into the latest headlines,

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B1 中級 武漢肺炎 新型冠狀病毒 新冠肺炎 COVID-19

鮑裡斯-約翰遜病情惡化與威斯康辛州大流行病初選|每日社交疏離秀-------。 (Boris Johnson’s Condition Worsens & Wisconsin’s Pandemic Primary | The Daily Social Distancing Show)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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