All right, first thing first is we're going to use tofu today. Get hard tofu and not a

silken tofu. I think this is also called cotton tofu. It's sort of a spongy texture and the

silken tofu is going to FU-up if you try to fry that shit in your skillet. What I'm going

to do is cut it to open it. I'm hacking at it with a ninja sword over here.

Now, you have this block of tofu. I'm going to cut it into four slices and one -- four

slices, ta-da. All right, now I have our little slices. I'm going to lay them out on a clean

towel and I'm going to press them with this thing for just a few minutes. I'm going to

let that sit on there for a little while and you're trying to get the water out, so that

a) when you fry it, it doesn't splatter and burn in your eyeballs and then also I'll absorb

a little less oil.

That's healthy and that's the theme of today's show guys: Health. That's been sitting for

a couple of minutes. Squeeze some of the water out. It looks a little drier. I'm going to

pre-heat my skillet because that's real important. If you watch my show you know that I'll say

that all the time. If you watch every time I remember to say it, pre-heat that skillet

rose and hose.

I'm going to let it heat up before I even put the oil in. It's hot. I'm going to put

in -- I never measure this. I bet it's probably like two tablespoons of oil. There's one,

there's two; yeah, probably two. Just enough to get a little coating and then you can see

my oil is already starting to boil and shimmer like a desert mirage, so that's good. I'm

going to let that get pretty, pretty hot; no joke. I'm putting in my tofus, it's going

to splatter a little bit, so be careful. Here we go. Wicked!

All right, these are going to fry for, I don't know, I think it usually takes like 4 or 5

minutes on each side. These are going to -- oh my god, totally burning me. These are going

to cook for maybe like 4 or 5 minutes on each side, I think. I'll time it for you and then

we'll find out -- I'm going to put a lid on it because this is getting splattered with

boiling oil and stuff. It's driving me insane. All right, it's been like two minutes. I'm

so bad with time, I apologize. Jesus, Lord.

It's a little dangerous, but you know what? Buck it up, tofu is good for your over even

stuff, especially if you fry it in some oil. All right, a couple of more minutes. It's

starting to calm down now. The water has kind of come out and then it's not like freaking

out like mixing water and oil, like Romeo and Juliet, I think where they talked about

it's sort of like oil and water. I think that's where that comes from, thanks Shakespeare

and HilahCooking. I'm going to turn off my skillet, save natural gas. All right, so they're

like all -- it's a little toasty, a little toasty, crispy, and I'll set those aside while

I do the rest of my preparations.

I've got some vegetables cut up here. You can use really literally whatever the hell

you want, it's awesome that way. You just want to make sure that everything is cut up

in pretty small pieces because you're cooking at really fast and at really high heat, so

the more surface area the better, the faster it's going to cook. You will want to put your

harder things in first. I'll put my carrots and onions in before the broccoli, so that

broccoli doesn't get all overcooked because everything should still be a little crispy

and delicious and awesome.

I have the oil left over from my tofu, and I'm reheating and then I'm going to put in

my vegetables. First, go in my carrots and then my onions. I learned how to make this

from my friend's mom in high school. We used to go over there, to her parent's house because

they had all this land around their house and we would do mushrooms and hang out in

the woods and stuff. We would go on walks and get hit by cars and then we would come

back and her mom would be all like, "Do you like some stir fry?" We're all like, "Ugh...

I don't like the look of that."

You know, that's just a really vivid and I remember looking at this big bowl of stir

fry and rice and totally tripping on mushrooms and just poking at broccoli. Anyways, I'm

going to move on then. I'm actually going to make a little circle to put the broccoli

in. Since I don't have a wok, this works fine, but you just have to make sure that everything

is able to touch the skillet at some point. Whoa! You didn't see that.

All right, and another thing about putting the vegetables in sort of in layers or something

is every time you add something to skillet it's going to cool it down a little bit. If

you put everything in at once, it's just going to drop your temperature like dramatically,

really fast and then you don't get the stir fry effect; you get like a steam effect, which

is not good. Okay, let's put that on high, do its thing for a few minutes while I cut

up my garlic.

I've got two little garlic cloves. Take that garlic. I'm going to smash them and then pull

the peels out and then chop them up pretty tiny, done. Set it aside. Cut some green onions

to add just a little bit spice at the end. I'm going to check on my little stir fry guys.

This is good, this is good, very good. My broccoli is getting bright green. My little

onions are all caramelize. This is going to be a really good breakfast. If any of your

little broccolis don't look like they're getting done, just shove them to the bottom. Get down

there. All right, look at this, it's almost done.

I'm going to put my tofu back in. First, I'm going to quarter each of these pieces over

here on my chopping board. I'm going to throw those biz back in there like it weren't nothing. Oh snap! Where's my soy sauce? Dang

it! I'm going to kill somebody. Nobody freak out, found the soy sauce. All right, so I'm

just going to put maybe two tablespoons, actually hold. I'm going to throw in my garlic and

onions on top of there, distribute it as evenly as possible. Oh my god, I'm getting a text,

hold on; just kidding. I shouldn't have said that, okay.

It's probably more like a teaspoon actually. I'm going to pot in some red pepper too. It's

going to be spicy. Screw it. Okay, this is done. One last little stir around to get everybody

mixed. Turn that off. It's stir fry time baby. Oh my god! It's going to be so good. It's

going to make me feel like a hundred times better, chockful of vitamins. All right, that's

it. That's how to make super easy, super-fast, super delicious stir fry.

Go subscribe to my YouTube. There's a little button down there that says subscribe. Then

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Bye!