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  • Susie Dent.

  • Books are the perfect gift for anyone that likes reading.

  • Amazons returns policy Susie, I hear you might be doing a tour this year.

  • What is the Susie Dent tour?

  • What will involve, well, seems like a Jimmy Carter, but it's about £20 cheaper going.

  • So you're on tour.

  • Go on, tell me.

  • Well, thank you.

  • I just talked for an hour and then I will answer people's queries.

  • So what?

  • What's the most common question you get?

  • Asked them benefits that I have enough this twice this year, Always a, which is quite a common question.

  • And that is one of them was quite nozzoli lady.

  • And she said, What's the G stand for in G spot?

  • It sounds like a guy calling this a gray from bag.

  • Who is the lucky guy who found it You've written a book about?

  • There's a woman called Beverly Whipple who actually discovered it and didn't want it named after her.

  • It was gonna be called Whipple's tickle, and she didn't She didn't want her name used on, and there's no part of the vagina that's named after a person that isn't named after a man with Paul.

  • So much, but I've got another good vagina.

  • Fact.

  • Yeah, Theo.

  • Gee, sport isn't actually a real thing, but the literacy is like 10 centimetres long.

  • Wow.

  • Okay, it isn't true.

  • It was originally called the Cleta.

  • Chris.

  • I'm going crazy.

  • I was actually in love sex with you, Okay?

  • Only charge of the numbers.

  • It's Rachel Riley.

  • Rachel's clitoris is 10 cents.

  • Ah, a small Penis.

  • Right.

  • So we need to talk.

  • I have one of those even deeper stories, though.

  • Yeah.

  • Word on the streets.

  • Is that wrong?

  • You didn't use your pecker to use 26?

  • Yeah, I didn't.

  • I didn't I didn't lose my virginity till I was 26 years.

  • What?

  • What?

  • We must have been some deeper angry went way.

  • You guys 26 you must be in here, Theo.

  • That's going through my mind is a still of you tell you know she That's me.

  • It's 17.

  • I think you are a fucking fish.

  • Why's it?

  • But you think virginity to you?

  • I think that might be the reason.

  • Just just put out his eyes.

  • They're in there somewhere.

  • But I'm telling you Oh, my God.

  • Wow.

  • It's like sitting across from gather the heart.

  • Really?

  • You guys laying here in a suit?

  • E.

  • I eat my custody standard because I've always been different one of my group because I'm used to shelling us.

  • Just me.

  • You've always been about one in your crap and get away with what you have been dealing with.

  • Not to be the fact that Theo you couldn't be a land mammal.

  • I'm not with that guy.

  • You have to be ocean bound.

  • Or you could go skinny bitch.

  • Really amazing.

  • You should do for the blind, I can tell you this that a few people at all, which is my camera number two?

  • Yeah.

  • Can you keep it?

  • It's wrong.

  • Honestly, let's take it seriously for one minute.

  • This is one of the biggest benders in the world.

  • Put on your television set.

  • Let's get 10 seconds to get us from going.

  • Do you want slightly?

  • Magic is Well, look at this and it's disappeared.

  • Way serious way.

  • I'm freaking people out, Yuri.

  • I'm just gonna change those two.

  • Bank Go now.

  • Everybody, don't place your spoon on your television set.

  • All of us are going to say 123 Don't And your spoons.

  • Your spoons are gonna jump off the TV at home.

  • Okay, but tell the speaker up really loud.

  • Wait a minute.

  • Okay.

  • Way Shout, Go to Rio.

  • Now, if you spoon Did love it, sailed across the room e mail, Jimmy?

  • Yeah, definitely.

  • Male may be done.

  • My left foot is now my right foot.

  • Big skeptical.

  • There will be thousands of people.

  • Email.

  • Jimmy.

  • My God, My spoon jump of the TV sailed across one of those people one day.

  • Might be the wife.

  • Might be the one You?

  • Yeah, it's time for the big fat question on as a salute to the late great Stanley, we've got some very special guests.

  • Help!

  • Ask it, ladies German, please give a big welcome to thought Black widow, Spider Man, Black Panther and the Incredible Hulk.

  • I'm definitely starting to hallucinate.

  • Okay?

  • These guys have all had a massive year of the box office.

  • Half the top 10 grossing movies worldwide had marvel characters in them.

  • But how well do you know them all?

  • All I want you to do is write down their riel name, you know?

  • Okay, Two points for each correct answer.

  • We've got Thor, black widow, Spider Man, Black Panther and the incredible Hawker One.

  • They're really Yes, Superman is Clark Kent yet?

  • I have a chat with hope.

  • No, you can't have a chat with him.

  • Can't talk.

  • Look at him.

  • Try and stand up for your boobs.

  • Make him giggle Russian if you got a mascot.

  • Yes, I do have a mascot.

  • I've got pizza.

  • Is your master Yes, my mask.

  • What you make of that?

  • No, I'm not knocking on this show.

  • I put on my mask locked inside.

  • Just brought in comfort food to get me for it growing I put in the cake.

  • Another part of my mascot way See how far you get through the pizza and the cake during the show?

  • Finished?

  • I like the way down now.

  • No, eat It comes.

  • Yeah, me What about you?

  • You you you got you got You got the baby's All right, Chairman, How many kids you go?

  • None.

  • You firing blanks cause them shots?

  • Because you hold your shot like a bony for 26 years And you kept got no bomb.

  • You did not make 27 bucks.

  • Get your Children.

  • You think not make might be the secret.

  • You know, Magnum union at least you might have to take a course of, like, Magnum for six months.

  • Magnum, the ice cream we're talking about, Magnum I drink would pull us.

  • There's a drink called Magnum in it.

  • It's like a wind tonic in it.

  • So they say like it, please.

  • You're a wine tonic.

  • Yeah.

  • Can we get some?

  • You get someone in here has definitely smuggled something thing.

  • Someone get this guy back, not drinking.

  • Fucking not make awesome, Magnum bitches.

  • Well, your magnum.

  • Yeah.

  • Yeah.

  • It doesn't work the same on girls.

  • Think it doesn't have the same effect.

  • I like it.

  • But it's medicine, right?

  • That one here just gave you another 50 million Flaming Soldiers TV show.

  • And someone has just handed me a brown bottle with the label removed.

  • I'm frightened.

  • It's like cough medicine.

  • But something strange is happening downstairs.

  • That's just something very new is happening.

  • T bag's coming back.

  • You know anything about being a grown up?

  • Thanks.

  • Once you you able to afford stuff, you get a letter in the post.

  • It says no.

  • Let's run the post.

  • I don't knock on the fucking door.

  • Best way to reduce stress.

  • Best way to reduce stress.

  • Pay your taxes.

  • I must just say this in case the taxman is watching.

  • Hello, I'm Jimmy.

  • Well, of course is always being volunteered for something.

  • Oh, you know when you saw you come down and this is going Okay, tell Mom to the airport, aren't you?

  • Oh, she's there with a code word on a possible trip down the young 25.

  • I don't understand.

  • The airport run anymore with the event of uber.

  • I don't understand why you've still got pick people up from the airport when you d'oh because something will pay tax and get trying.

  • Why doesn't everyone just get a private car?

  • So guests to know that majorly guest it's made to be gas, Jimmy.

  • Yeah, Just be careful, because I'm very sensitive.

  • Mo Farah sign.

  • It's definitely not the Mo Farrah.

  • Famously, it's that isn't students most hearts and m for Mo.

  • You know this is it?

  • Yeah, it's stress.

  • And Fred Yes, you're I'm too sexy for my talk.

  • Yeah, but you know, right?

  • Said Fred doesn't present the crystal maze thing to poor white people.

  • This crystal maze guy.

  • Hello.

  • No, famously guys get into this again, but it isn't.

  • There's loads of things on that is an either.

  • If you see Jimmy in the street when he was younger, John didn't want to be a comedian.

  • Congratulations.

  • He's appeared on Cats Does Countdown before, when he was the first ever non English speaker in dictionary corner.

  • People have criticized Danny's acting over the years, but what they don't know is he's actually a 50 year old Jamaican lady.

  • Go on and do one of your crappy jokes.

  • That's the Spirit Road was brought up in CA Marvin in commodity in Wales.

  • You're not sure what that's like.

  • Imagine a rubbish bin in a skip on a landfill.

  • Yeah, Martin is the oldest town in Wales.

  • It's T K.

  • Maxx dates back to medieval one for you collectively and one for him.

  • Sam trained his event, then turned to comedy, and he's known in both careers for his put downs as an Australian.

  • What do you make of British culture?

  • Not much.

  • I mean, a lot comes on with me.

  • It's pretty good.

  • British culture's pretty good, but you don't have much culture.

  • I mean, really, when you really think about it, especially when it comes to food, it came from it came from the Nords or the Vikings who invaded.

  • I believe I can't believe in Australia.

  • And it's sitting there accusing us of having no culture because of that well known Australian cuisine you guys invented when you started existed five minutes ago.

  • All of your food is prison food.

  • Well, I love the encouragement.

  • This clearly isn't happening.

  • Fuck you.

  • 48% of Brits think social networks can help new relationships.

  • It's so true.

  • My life has been such a social world, Wind.

  • Since I joined Grindr, I've hardly been able to sit down.

  • This week, 15 Australian miners were sacked for doing the Harlem shake.

  • I was saying that in the heart of you're familiar with the Harlem shake race.

  • They did it at their workplace.

  • They were sacked.

  • So we asked Our studio audience is important to have fun at work.

  • Yes or no.

  • No, no.

  • I'll ask you questions for them.

  • Really way.

  • Have you never seen this fucking job?

  • Were you thinking sex?

  • Someone on their right?

  • And you know that everyone's watching.

  • Does it not like going to the back?

  • Your mind?

  • Your mom's gonna see this?

  • No.

  • Is to Thurman.

  • Was all right with it because you don't see every feeling.

  • Imagine she's hardly on the pillow when any bits has happened.

  • You know, she was super proud of us.

  • Is a good, great performance.

  • My boy smashed the back doors in their ways.

  • He's so good at shagging in it, she could barely walk down to the pool the next morning.

  • You want you watching this?

  • You found Yes.

  • No, I'm finding road.

  • Your father.

  • I do like any Marie, but I I have a crash.

  • Roger.

  • You go across your brother Federal.

  • Well, if you would like some of the looks a little bit like a special needs.

  • Younger brother.

  • Father, my friend.

  • You don't like federal fees?

  • If he stood in front of that ball cannon, you come second.

  • You?

  • No, in our top three.

  • But I don't mean to take anything away from Andy Murray, but let's put this into perspective.

  • Andy Murray has won one grand slam, which means he's one just one more grand slam than make time for a quick bonus.

  • Right?

  • Have a look under your desks.

  • You'll each find an item of clothing once worn by a celebrity.

  • All I want to know is who or what?

  • So if you could all put these on.

  • Okay, So you gotta put on your red line.

  • You pop these on a naval sex.

  • I've never felt more alive to me.

  • Look.

  • Okay, Richard, that is not That's only half your costume.

  • We've got the other half to come in.

  • We bring in the other half of Richard's costume.

  • It comes up.

  • That's fine.

  • Yeah, I got it.

  • Don't.

  • Last year, hatchlings dressed like meat.

  • Oh, yeah.

  • He'll try and eat me wearing you kids go to the jungle.

  • Okay.

  • What's what's what's everyone way?

  • No, no, no, no, no.

  • I mean that way, of course, is Susie Dent.

  • Theo, 14 books about the derivations of words.

  • And you can find them all in your local library.

  • Just ask for the sleepy go.

  • Bye.

  • Bye section.

  • Okay, Susie, what have you been looking into recently for?

  • The glory holes Stop necessary.

  • You know what you'd be looking into recently?

  • Waking to the language of doctors is quite interesting.

  • Things like brussels sprouts.

  • Doctors have these ridiculous names to try.

  • And the black humor cuma tiu try and keep the horrible stuff that day.

  • So brussel sprouts basically, just it's genital warts.

  • Theo.

  • Um, yeah, it really I can I'm just thinking doing uh huh.

Susie Dent.

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教會的卡爾學。吉米-卡爾學堂:吉米-卡爾最有趣的時刻!| 10只貓中的8只貓,大胖子問答等! (The Church of Carr-ology: Jimmy Carr's FUNNIEST Moments! | 8 Out of 10 Cats, Big Fat Quiz & More!)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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