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Well, hello.
I'm Tyra Banks.
And this is what would tyrant, huh?
This'd from all the boys I've loved before?
Where Peter is asking for a fake relationship with Lauren.
What would have way let people think that we were actually together?
You know what I would say?
Sure, Peter.
As long as you fake, take me out to dinner to Red Lobster.
For some all you can eat shrimp every day for a month, and then you give me fake kisses because your finest hell every day for a month.
And then we have a deal.
This'll is a scene from the famous bridesmaids where Kristen Weeks character is all like, Oh, my God, I'm on a plane and I'm so scared.
So she takes a Xanax and she has a shot at something, and she comes from coach to first class to talk to her homies.
Just stop it right there.
She touched a black girl's hair.
That's just a no, no.
Do you understand?
You don't touch a black woman's hair for many reasons.
First of all, we're not a science project.
Second of all, we're not a petting zoo.
Third of all, some of us have tracks in wigs and wiggle weaves to know what that is.
That's like a wig and a weave.
So you just don't do that.
I don't care how drunk you are.
I don't care how scared you are, and I don't care about the rest of this scene.
We could move on.
So this is Lindsay Lohan, my girl.
What's up?
And she's in Ming Girls.
And she came to the Halloween party looking like a really Halloween party.
All the other girls came looking like a H to the O.
What would I do?
I would walk up to these little girls and say I have two photos in my hands and the name that I do not call must immediately return to your Halloween haunt house, pack your bags and go home.
I would pull the photo out, and it would be neither of these bitches.
Okay, They would both have to pack because these bitches invited me and told me to wear a costume but did not give the small print.
So both of which has got a go sort of friends.
And Ross is about to marry Emily.
However, we all know that he's in love with Rachel, and he makes this mistake.
Take thee, Emily.
Take thee, Rachel.
Oh, my God.
First of all, if I was Emily, I would get butt naked immediately.
And I would then pull Rachel up and make her get butt naked.
And then I put my wedding dress in my little cheap ass tiara on her and say, You know what?
You could have him.
Priest, Proceed.
Is that what you would do?
Thing is an episode of America's next Top Model where my model Alexandra falls down.
But when I do, if I were her well, I would make it like it was on purpose.
So I fall down those stairs and get up, then walk three paces and then fall down in front of the editor.
Get up.
That was a hot mess.
Then I take a couple of paces and fall again.
Get up fiercely to understand Things happen in threes, darling.
And so I just make it like it was on purpose.
And then I get to the end of the runway and just, like, fall off the end pop up famous scene in life size where Lindsay Lohan's character first wakes up Thio.
I do Lindsay Lohan and this strange woman woke up in the bed with me.
I'd say This is so amazing.
We need to make a sequel.
I think this is the famous nobleman boy and Wal Mart.
If I was there, I would take him on my back.
I'd say Help on tight eyes back.
We are going to runway, walk and yodel ay hee hoo all the way through these aisles, through the light bulbs through the ham hocks through the Twinkies.
You're late.
Who we are so fast.
Yes, child, he would be America's next top Fiordland, baby, Whatever.
I don't know.
So here's the scene in Lindsay Lohan and Jamie Lee.
Curtis is freaky Friday, where Jamie Lee Curtis wakes up and her daughter, Lindsay Lohan's little 10 year old 12 year old brain, is up in her head.
I'd be like, Teach me how to use Snapshot.
Teach me how to use Snapchat because I don't know what the hell is going on.
Well, that concludes what Tyra Banks do now.


How Tyra Banks Would Handle Peter Kavinsky, Bridesmaids and More | Glamour

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林宜悉 發佈於 2020 年 3 月 28 日
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