I never have time for such frivolous activities

particularly as I’m off busy making the world a much better place..

But this year I’ve been looking for ways of boosting this channel’s appeal to the Japanese demographic

which means I’ve actually got to put some effort in and do something.

So recently, when I was contacted by members of an idol group looking to take part in some sort of challenge with a foreign competitor

I thought good fortune had come my way.

Members from of an idol group called Kissbee, who’d nicknamed themselves the Samurai Girls

wanted to battle me and my “Japanese friend with a British accent”

” in some kind of traditional Japanese game.

What follows is probably the closest experience I’ve had to being on a Japanese style tv show.

The Samurai girls saw it as an opportunity to have some fun

I on the other hand saw, it as an opportunity to destroy them with Marmite.

We agreed to meet the girls an hour south of Sendai,

in an old mansion called Sairiyashiki

with the kind of creepy atmosphere that seemed like a pretty fitting backdrop for our competition

So this is where we’re going to meet the idol group

Do you ever think this is quite weird, the whole youtube thing and the situations that arise.

I’m still trying to get my head around it myself.

But I’ll roll with it, let’s go and see what happens.

So what actually is this place?

So this is like a merchant’s place that’s over 100 years old

It does look pretty old

You're late!

You lazy ass!!

I’m not a lazy ass

And we’re not late either

Come inside

Get changed!

All right. Ok.

Is it a good idea?

You have no idea how long this took to put on.

I’ve never worn a Samurai costume before.

The only bonus that comes with it, is a real...

Careful! Bloody hell.

Is a real sword.

That could actually kill someone.

Oh my god.

This is shaping up to be a rather weird Monday.

Looking like this.

It’s definitely not awkward.

How you doin'?

Good.

The game we’d be playing is called Karuta.

An expression or proverb is read out and the aim is to find the card

Containing the first syllable of the sentence in Hiragana characters.

We’d be playing 5 rounds

With the winning team of each round being the first to get 3 cards on their side.

And to raise the stakes

One person from the losing team would have to forfeit each round with an unpleasant food item.

On our side I’d brought Black Liquorice, Marmite and Root Beer

Things that don’t go down well with Japanese taste buds

And the girls had brought Grasshoppers - actual grasshoppers

And a horrific slimy dish called Natto

A dish which makes me sick straight away when it goes anywhere near my mouth

It is quite honestly the worst food ever made by humans

We’re going to kick your ass.

And I’m going to poison you with Marmite so good luck with that.

Alright, let’s get it going.

Let's get it started.

So quick!

You’re Japanese, you’re supposed to read things quickly.

So quick!

We're strong!

They need one more and they’ve won the first round.

You cover this part, I’ll cover this part.

We lost three rounds in about 20 seconds. Unbelievable.

Brilliant. Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant.

It’s all your fault.

Shutup.

Mr Sakurai, eat Marmite.

I thought I was eating something Japanese though?

Can you eat Marmite?

I don’t know.

That is a dangerous amount of marmite.

You could probably die of salt poisoning but it’d be a great video.

How’d you describe your feelings in three words.

I can’t swallow it.

I don’t want to win, if this is the sort of thing that keeps happening.

Disgusting!

If ever there was an incentive to win the next round, it’s that.

Alright come on.

So quick!

So quick!

It was your side.

No!!!

You won it. You won.

You lost.

Punishment.

10 grasshoppers.

10? 10!

10 grasshoppers.

Ok, I’ll seppuku.

No! No seppuku.

10!

I can barely eat it one. Look at it.

Really?

That’s not even funny.

Oh for god’s sake.

Do you feel legs?

Do you feel bodies?

Do you feel the organs?

Oh it’s horrible, why. It’s the worst texture ever.

Can I have root beer?

No root beer.

Root Beer! Root beer! Root beer!

My marmite is still in my mouth for god's sake. It tastes like it.

That was made for consumption.

This was an insect.

It’s a food as well.

No it’s not it’s a Grasshopper.

Oh for God’s sake.

We’re not going to be able to play, because I'm just going to be sick all over all the cards.

I see the grasshopper legs stuck in your...

Shut up.

We have to win.

Three times.

Ok, this time. Alright.

First time.

Finally, Chris did it.

And I'm expecting a second time too.

What?

Wow!

Oh no!

One more.

This is bad.

Finally.

Revenge is a dish, best served with marmite.

You are going to have your mouth filled with marmite.

Good luck with that.

Your smirking face, won’t be smirking for much longer.

One bite!

Disgusting!

Delicious!

Revenge is just so rewarding.

Seeing that happen.

You gotta chew it.

Genuinely going to be sick.

This is brilliant.

In one English word how would you describe that?

No!

Probably a good word to use.

Rock paper scissors?

You got it.

Rock paper scissors

Paper beat rock!

No!

I forfeit because I touched the wrong card.

That was in front

It was there?!

Unbelievable.

I though it was there, it was right there. What an idiot I am.

There.

One more. 2-2, even.

Winner!

It’s time for Liquorice. And you’re the only one who hasn’t had some sort of delicious snack.

Delicious?

People enjoy this in the UK.

Water please.

There is no water.

That was bad.

Such great friendship.

Last round.

Let's try our best!

I’m not sure who’s come off worse to be honest.

Everybody is pretty motivated now.

I got it!

This is bad.

Got it!

Oh shit. Oh dear.

We're the best!

Winner!

You!

It was your fault I got one! You got nothing. Nothing.

How old are you? 50? And you can’t even look at a card.

Unbelievable.

Go on then do your worst.

I don't even know who's going down.

Chris eat bread...

On natto

And marmite

And grasshopper.

What?

Cooking.

I can’t eat that! I can’t eat that.

You can do it.

Look at it.

You can do it.

Oh come on! I can’t put that in my mouth.

I cannot put that in my mouth.

I can't eat that.

3! 2! 1!

Go!

Marmite, natto, insects, all together.

So that was the game.

Yeah it was good that. Really fun.

I just love the fact you finally got to eat natto again.

Thank you very much.

I hate you. You set me up.

No, I didn’t set you up.

You set me up.

That was their decision.

To put natto and everything on

How's the root beer?

This is gross.

Hospital

It's hospital.