Yes.

Today I am so fucking excited to do this video.

Now, listen, I have been a woman before.

Like, you know how much I love my wigs.

And you know how sickening I look in my Kardashian close?

Yeah, that's a big old bitch, but I have never actually really try to make myself look pretty.

So today I'm doing a full drag queen makeover by myself.

I am not a perfection a ll drag race They wouldn't even let.

Judy asked me to sashay away into oncoming traffic and let a truck hit me and snatch my organs.

But today I'm gonna give it a try.

I have so much stuff here.

Literally.

I'm not kidding.

I have a rainbow selection of lipsticks.

I have this eye, but dazzle that is not fucking around.

There's glue in here.

I'm gonna rip up my eyes.

I have, like, a collection of clothes and wigs.

I even have some fake ass titties.

I told you I am bringing it today.

Also, these air.

Not exactly what I wanted.

I wanted, like, big fake cleavage.

And, well, they just sent me.

I don't even know what these are, but they are.

Wow.

Just like my titties.

Okay, so let's get started.

Actually, no.

I feel like you need to see my whole station, so let me give you a glimpse into this.

So first, over here we have my vanity, which is a mere on top of a tub of dog treats.

I'll set up my phone and I need to call 911 because I am definitely gonna hurt myself.

And then over here, I have all of my equipment.

I have my candy bra.

Have mike eyeliner.

I have a bunch of stones.

I have different wigs.

I have Jesus, I'm gonna need him.

And I have a cat that's currently looking for a home.

Seriously, anybody wants him?

He is looking looking outside Cheeto, wondering what else is out there.

Me too.

Okay, let's get started with my calculation.

I need to put my hair back.

So I'm gonna be using my please stop putting this next to a picture.

David, don't brick and tagging on Instagram because that is offensive to him.

Like Liza isn't just shook.

She's vomiting.

Okay, But first we have the Purell, our hands, mainly because I have been not watching my hands after I wipe my ass.

And that's mainly because I just read that so lazy, like, don't get me wrong.

If there's, like, a little piece of duty on my hand, I will like it off on my shirt like I'm not a monster.

Okay, now that we're all clean, it is time to get our foundation.

I didn't know what color I waas so absolutely a target.

Hi.

Do you have anything for somebody That's never been outside something for people who are so white when they take a picture, they don't even need a flash.

Something for a human glow stick.

So she gave me this.

This is it just has nude.

I hope not.

This is not the color of me nude color.

Me nude is governing hair.

Okay, I don't have a beauty blunder because I think I burned them with a blow torch.

I just like to keep my morning routine lit.

So I have this brush thing that I bought for some video.

Uh, okay, let's use it.

Okay.

Escorting their guess, We'll just put it on my face.

Let's get a little close.

I hate that.

Who?

God, This reminds face tunes like when you hit it too hard.

Okay.

Oh, my God.

Oh, I am gonna be beautiful.

I'm calling it.

I'm gonna be the new queen of YouTube like that.

Stop shaking.

Oh, my God.

This is everything.

I wish I could just do this every day.

Just, like, take a magic brush and erase my face.

How?

Oh, this I'm killing it.

Pile this on.

Oh, yeah.

Think of a guru.

I'm gonna go back to that lady a target to be like you did this.

Uh, she quits.

Oh, this is great.

I love this.

All right, so let's see how this looks far away.

Oh, my God.

Oh, I look like somebody who lives underground.

Somebody who just saw the life for the first time.

Wow, this is terrifying.

Okay, lets move up.

So now that we have our face ripped off, we're going to move on to color.

Should I do my highlight or next?

No, no.

Let's figure out my eyes.

So I had two different selections for I should first have this which comes with every fucking color imaginable.

Nobody needs this.

This is crazy.

Why?

They're seven different purples, which there's only one purple Teletubby and that's all we need.

We need eight shades of pope who had watched that just like Tinky Winky getting his ass kicked.

But all laws like next and they're like, cover up your eyes, big baby son, you're not old enough to be the home of childhood memories.

Okay, so we have this.

We also have this which is called Chez Me, which is why I got it.

That's what my mom used to call me when I was a kid.

After she sees this, she's never gonna call me again.

So this is fun because it looks like that's all there is.

And it's like, Okay, I guess there's only a couple colors, but bitch Oh, it's like a dining room table that opens up for a party.

But you don't know it does that cause you never needed it is so I think I'm going to use this one because he's a little more glittery.

I feel like that's exactly what my face needs right now.

More shine.

But before we get to that, we need to pick a wig.

So I have two different ones here, and I need you guys.

It's honest.

Wait.

Number one If this is my drag queen.

Look, my name would be Nicki Minaj.

Yeah, this is gross.

I hate this.

It looks like I washed my hair with more hair.

It looks like I need to use deodorant on my head.

Yeah, we're not.

Next way.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

When you find your new identity, if this is everything Oh, my God.

If this was 2008 bitch Alby and everyone's happy.

This is amazing.

I love this.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

I just leave it on now for effort.

Yeah, OK, let's just leave it on.

Okay, So let's do our makeup around this color scheme.

I feel like I am a unicorn.

Abortion clown, diarrhea.

Let's start with her eyes.

Okay, so I think I'm gonna go with maybe, like, a purple blue fade, almost like a pimp.

My ride.

If my face was a car, what kind of car would be Never mind?

I figured it out.

An army tank.

All right, so I think I want to start with purple on the outside.

But once again, guys, I am really trying.

I'm not trying to make this funny.

I actually want you guys to want to fuck me.

I want you guys to pause this video, bringing your dad and have a place smash your past with me.

Your dad, Like, smash in the head with a bat smashing with my car.

Okay.

No, no.

Hold on.

I can fix this.

Oh, my God.

How many wife wants to use a blue?

Okay, this is a little much, but it's okay.

We can fix it.

Oh, my God.

This is looking good.

Wait.

I want to do something that I've seen dragons do where they put like white in the corner.

We bring out their eyes that work, do that kind of work.

Oh, my God.

Why am I so good at this?

Oh, my God.

Sorry.

I just love myself for the first time.

Okay, so now that we have the eye shadow done, it is time to put on our highlighter.

All right, so I guess we're just gonna put this on her.

I never done this like right before.

So nervous.

Oh, no.

Ruined it.

Oh, no magic brush Come through.

Oh, yeah.

I think when I changed my Twitter bio from comedian to get through.

I can't wait to have my own makeup line.

It's gonna be called.

Both my own.

Said called only it, Mac.

Okay, I think our eyes are almost done way.

You know, they're not.

So I don't know how to do this.

I guess I just take them on.

Who glare.

Fuck.

Okay, here we go.

I'm scared.

Oh, my God.

Is that everything?

Wait, is everything I don't know I can't tell.

Isn't everything, is it?

Nothing.

Is it something It hurts.

I don't know how I feel about that.

Never mind.

I love it.

Actually, no, it really, actually.

Really What?

We do it upside down.

That's everything.

Oh, my God.

I'm serious.

Guys, I am gonna change my profession.

Profession cuts me, putting a fucking peep on a power drill.

Right?

So let's put this one under other I Oh, I look like a gay demon.

That's okay.

So next I this I'm a little scared because this actually feels glue, and I don't want to do that, So I think I'm just gonna try to stick them on without it.

I think I did it.

Oh, wow.

Those are great.

All those changed the whole look.

I just went from a gay demon to somebody who went to Coachella and was murdered.

And then they found her body two weeks later.

Like this?

Oh, no, they're falling off.

Okay, I'm actually going to use this little boo.

Scared to put it on the actual eyelash.

I just filled it out.

Okay, Okay.

Okay.

A little over my eyes.

Oh, fuck.

Okay, it hurts.

Okay.

Fuck that.

We're not doing that.

Instead, what I think I'm gonna do is paint this highlighter little duty colored thing on top of my eyelashes.

Oh, yeah, that's great.

Okay, I also have all of these little face jewels.

So, like, should we actually do, like, maybe like, a little like I don't That means, But I'm sure there's some drag queens out there that could trained like that.

They're like, Oh, yeah, it means like a little something.

Something makes your Yeah, totally.

Actually, I don't even think I need this because I have this unless, like rainbow, that's gay.

Come to me like this.

Sorry.

No, that's too gay.

Okay, so now that her eyes were done less Hi, I'm sorry.

What I meant to say was let Skylight.

Okay, so I'm just gonna do what?

I've seen a lot of drag queens.

D'oh!

Which it?

Bitch?

That wasn't even intentional.

I am turning into them.

They just do, like a slight.

And then they do a slight when they go down their nose.