The lights were off, and it was the middle of the night.

當時半夜，燈是關著的 。

I came into the room like a psycho.

我像瘋了一樣走進房間。

I was in the piano and I just started playing the piano.

我走到鋼琴前開始彈。

But I remember, like coming up with this.

但我記得，靈感來的時候。

That's just like chord progression that I thought was beautiful, and I wrote this tiny little lyric that I just kept looping over and over again.

就好像一段優美的和弦進行，然後我寫了一小段歌詞，它不斷在我的腦海徘徊。

It was just, like, played with them and mess with them.

就像不斷嘗試和混合他們。

- We had a very, like, jazzy Frank Sinatra view on the whole song, and Daniel Caesar, Frank Sinatra.... - Bublé. - Bublé, Johnny Mathis.

- 整首歌都包含Frank Sinatra的爵士風格，還有Daniel Caesar、Frank Sinatra…… - Bublé。 - Bublé，Johnny Mathis。

Here we found a drum loop, and then laid an electric bass, and that's like the whole verse is those two things, and Billie's voice.

我們在這裡加入鼓聲循環，然後用電子低音做出層次，基本上整段主歌就是這兩個元素加上比莉的聲音。

That's it.

就這樣。

Yeah, so the day we wrote "Zani."

對啊，那天我們寫了《Zani 》。

Um, the night before, I had been with a group of my friends and they all got drunk, and we're throwing up, and I wasn't.

嗯……那晚的前一晚，我跟一群朋友在一起，他們都喝醉了然後就開始吐，但我沒有。

And drooling.

還有流口水。

And they were all you know...they're drooling, thrown up, drinking, kept throwing up, kept drinking more, kept throwing up more and then kept drinking.

然後你知道他們就……流口水啊、吐啊、繼續喝，繼續吐，然後喝更多又吐更多，一直喝一直喝。

And what was really weird to me is that nobody cared, like the first girl that got drunk and started throwing up...

但我覺得很怪的是，根本就沒有人關心，就是第一個喝醉的女生開始吐……

Nobody like...they, like just held her hair back and just were like, she was throwing up everywhere and nobody was, like phased.

沒有人在乎……他們就只是把她頭髮抓著，然後這樣，她吐得到處都是，然後沒有人幫忙。

And it was so weird, I just was like, "What?" like this is normal.

真的是超怪，我就想說，「蛤？」，好像這很平常。

That's normal for you guys.

對你們來說那很正常。

Just watching my friends become completely not who they were, watching their personalities, just like crumple up and like, fall.

看著我朋友都變成另一種人，看著他們的本性逐漸扭曲然後墮落。

There was this girl there.

有一位女孩在那。

She had, um, two cigarettes in her hands, and she put both of them, both of them in her mouth, and she went like this, "Hey, Billy."

她手上拿著兩支菸，然後她把那兩支都放到嘴巴裡，然後說，「嘿，比莉。」

She looked at me. She went...and she blew the smoke into my face.

她看著我。然後把菸吐到我臉上。

We wanted it to sort of sound like what it feels like, to be in second-hand smoke.

我們想讓這首歌聽起來和被二手菸繚繞的感受一樣。

I was thinking, you know, what is smoke look like?

我那時在想，菸是怎麼樣的？

How can we make it sound the way that smoke looks in the way that smoke feels in your lungs and what your lungs look like when they're smoke in your lungs and...

我們要怎樣能讓歌聽起來有菸的形象和感覺，當菸在你的肺裡面，你的肺是怎麼樣的，然後……

The thing is that if you listen to the song, you feel uncomfortable.

其實如果你去聽這首歌，你會覺得不太舒服。

- And I... the sort of idea from that was... - Is we dirtied up with the flaws.

- 這個主意來自於…… - 來自於我們在人聲部分加入瑕疵。

We distorted the vocal.

把人聲扭曲。

We distorted the vocal.

我們把人聲扭曲。

We made the bass like insane. And it just if you listen to the verses of "xanny", that's more like a white silk huge curtain that's just like flowing around.

我們把低音部分弄得很瘋狂。如果你去聽《xanny》的主歌，它聽起來會像一張巨大的白色絲質窗簾四處飄彿。

- It feels uncomfortable is the perfect words... - Sounds like a headache.

-感覺很「不舒服」是最貼切的形容…… -聽起來很讓人頭痛。

It feels like a headache.

感覺很像頭痛。

It feels like...

它感覺起來……

- The verses are like what smoke looks like, and the choruses are like what it feels like. - In your lungs is yeah.

- 主歌呈現菸的形象，副歌刻畫菸的感受。 -沒錯，在你的肺裡。

I feel like when I've been with a friend who's drunk, I'm alone, like they're not there anymore.

我覺得和一個喝醉的朋友在一起，就好像只剩自己了，好像他們都離開了。

Drugs and you know, cigarettes are, "Are you killing yourself?"

藥物和菸就像：「你在自殺嗎？」

You're slowly killing yourself with them.

你在慢慢用它們來殺死自己。

I can't afford to love someone who isn't dying by mistake.

我承受不起愛一個不是因為犯了錯而死亡的人。

Loving someone, giving your all to someone, it's draining, even if it's out of... even if it's a good thing.

愛一個人，把自己的全部都給他，會耗盡自己，即使那是一件好事。

Even if you're in love with someone, and there are in love with you, it takes a lot out of you.

就算那份愛是雙向的，也會把自己消耗很多。

I don't want to love someone who I'm gonna lose, because they're killing themselves.

我不想愛一個我將會失去的人，因為他們在自殺。

Like right after that, I did the last vocal of the song, the last verse, and...

在那之後，我完成了歌曲人聲的最後一個部分，最後的主歌，然後……

A friend of mine had, like, passed, like, two days before, and so I was like, "Really?"

我有一位朋友，就在兩天前，過世了，很難以置信。

It really, like, hard.

那真的很難受。

- And that's why was really hard to record that song, because I was really.... - Cut out about it. - Um, yeah, I was really emotional about it.

-那就是為什麼我錄音時很難受，因為我真的…… - 被這件事給牽動了。 - 嗯，對，讓我變得很情緒化。

And there was a lot of takes where I'd just stop because I couldn't do it.

我錄了很多遍，因為我真的唱不下去。

I couldn't...hard to sing when you're crying...hard.

我做不到，哭的同時還要唱歌真的很難。

- And so when you listen to the last verse of that song and it sounds super broken it was just the rawest, I think form of that time... - I remember she went...

- 所以最後一段主歌聽起來很破碎，那種最真實的狀態。 - 我記得她當時……

And I've never heard that in a song before.

我從來沒有在其他歌中聽到過。