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  • Hi, everyone, and welcome back to my channel on Welcome back to another video In today's video, I kind of wanted to do the same kind of thing I did a couple of weeks ago on dhe.

  • I answered a number of the questions that I felt that maybe I'd avoided on DDE.

  • Not really shed much light on and just kind of hoping gave you a bit more of an insight into me as a person on dhe things in the past, things in the present on dhe.

  • I actually really enjoyed that video, and I enjoyed filming it, and at the end of it was that she had that felt like therapy on.

  • Even when I watched it back, I Aiken ready.

  • Sit through one of my own videos on.

  • I watched it back like twice on.

  • I enjoyed it, and it seems like a lot of you did as well.

  • I think there was one comment that that I usually give you a hard time.

  • I liked you in this, and I was like So I thought that there's got to be more questions that I probably didn't get around answering in that because I enjoy filming it so much, I thought that I would do another one.

  • Hopefully, it's not gonna be as long winded that one, because that basically did include my entire life story.

  • Almost so I hopefully we'll have this one down a little bit.

  • But I have a couple of questions, probably about five, that I thought that I would go through with you now.

  • So here we are with my second spilling the tea on myself video.

  • I hope you enjoy it.

  • Let me know in the comments on what you thought.

  • And also, if you have any questions that you feel like I haven't answered before, then please don't hesitate in the comments because it's always good for me.

  • Looking back at stuff like this, I'm able to be, like, okay that I could maybe answer in another video so good.

  • So without further ado, let's get into the first question.

  • So the first question is, how do you deal with the criticism on negativity on?

  • This is a question.

  • I feel like I've answered before, but I maybe haven't answered in the way that I should answer.

  • What I enjoyed about that video I feel before was that I was just honest, and I just answered in the only way I knew how to.

  • When I must ask this question about negativity and correct criticism, I often feel quite defensive on dhe.

  • I often feel like I have to keep up a front on, make it seem like it doesn't hurt me and make it seem like, you know, it doesn't affect me on DDE.

  • Um, I've had some time over the last few weeks and months to reflect on the things that have happened with me being on the Internet.

  • From when I spoke about needing a photographer on trips to the hush pajama event on dhe, I have kind of I realize that I don't need to put up a front with those with the way that I feel about negativity anymore on how I deal with it, To be perfectly honest with you, I didn't deal with it.

  • I dealt with it terribly on Dhe.

  • I had some really, really horrible times with it on DDE.

  • I I would act like online that I wasn't having those times on.

  • They didn't exist.

  • I thought that this was a really good question to give you some insight into how the difficult times that I've had the played out means that have affected me.

  • But how I deal with them now.

  • So if we go way back Thio when I tweeted about how brand sometimes invite me away on trips and want me to create the same content.

  • But I can't take a person with me I received.

  • I received four days off constant trolling.

  • Not troubling that.

  • That's a word I use is not trolling opinions.

  • I received a received four days of opinions on the topic from other creators in the industry, some of them laced with Well, I felt to be unnecessary, like animosity towards me in it.

  • But it was difficult.

  • It was.

  • It was embarrassing on dhe.

  • It was difficult because when I tweeted that I never felt like, you know, I didn't feel like I was.

  • My intentions went bad.

  • I've been speaking to a creative that was on a trip, and she was explaining how upset she was to be in a beautiful place on.

  • She couldn't capture any content because she was by herself on I felt her.

  • I felt her on a real level there because I've been in that situation and it is frustrating, especially if that's the kind of online created that you are.

  • When you create content with someone else, it can be quite difficult.

  • I mean, since that tweet I have, I did have brands retail to me and say that we actually take what you what you tweeted onboard and it makes perfect sense.

  • So although I had hard time with it, I am I realized that no, everyone is always gonna take what you're saying in the way that you intend it on a snow is that your intentions are good.

  • Then I think that that's kind of the main thing from that.

  • But I took.

  • Obviously I had other other times since that.

  • But I've learned to trust my intentions, Maur than what?

  • How people take what I'm saying.

  • So as long as I meant well, then I think that that's kind of the main point in terms of what happens online.

  • I know that there are obviously forums and there are people that kind of spill out of those forms onto my home.

  • On the Internet, I saw tatty mention, Actually, this is my home and that was that Tonight's wave had to describe it in the sense that it's her home.

  • And you know she's inviting you into her home on its no okay for people to be unnecessarily abusive.

  • Now I'm the first person to say that abuses subjective, I think, like I mean, it's a difficult subject, isn't it?

  • You might not think that swearing and calling someone names and things like that you might not see that is abusive because that might be your normality.

  • But for someone like me, that's quite a difficult thing to take.

  • So when comments are friend as constructive but have underlying tones off spite, that right was probably the right way to use.

  • Despite on dhe, Narcisse is quite difficult to take the constructive criticism from that because it's really hard to take a constructive criticism that feels like a personal attack.

  • So if I was going to constructively criticize someone, so say with my videos, I've been struggling with the sound and all those behind the scenes.

  • I'm trying to find a good microphone.

  • Not a lot of people want to tell me what a good microphone is not have looked, but it's, um I would probably say someone I love your videos because I'm evidently watching them.

  • However, it might be an idea to look a sound because it was quite difficult to watch that video because the sound was really bad.

  • There goes my friends out there.

  • Maybe that would be my kind of constructive criticism approach.

  • I don't necessary, you know, because this is who I am and I'm putting myself on the Internet.

  • I can't necessarily take constructive criticism against the person I am because that is who I am on DDE.

  • I'm quite fond of who I am is a great qualities.

  • So taking negativity criticism is quite difficult because we don't ask for it on Dhe.

  • It's not something that it was never as bad as it is now.

  • I think I've seen a lot of creators speaking about this.

  • I felt like I was quite alone for a while, and then I felt like I was like the most hated um, you TBA because I received so much negativity.

  • But I think it's it's kind of spreading now, and I see a lot of people speaking about a lot of people struggling on Dhe.

  • When I was drugged me with it, I was really nothing tohave Thio really big, created his kind of give me a little bit of insight and understanding and a little bit of a few tips on it.

  • One go is from Australia on.

  • She was just she just sit into Deanna's and she was like, This is what's happening it This is why it's happening.

  • And this is kind of how you can digested a little bit better.

  • And then I had another U K created that basically explained to me that is normal, to feel the need to have someone help you work through being online on DDE.

  • That was really helpful for me as well.

  • So now whenever I see someone else speaking online about their struggles on the Internet with the criticism in the negativity, I slide into that diems on.

  • I tried to offer them my experiences on my advice on dhe just to know that they're not alone, because the hardest thing for me was feeling like I was the most hated person on the Internet on DDE, that I was the only one that was going through it.

  • So I tried to make sure that no matter what, no one feels like that So, Yeah, that's my little rumbly kind of take on criticism and negativity, but I know I feel like I need to put up a front on that like it doesn't bother me.

  • I am able to acknowledge what is a constructive comment on what isn't a constructive comment on anything that just, I just feel is an attack on me is basically no allowed in my space anymore.

  • It's not for you to tell me what isn't is or isn't constructive.

  • That's a decision that I make on dhe.

  • If you're worried about your comment being taken that way, possibly read, read it a couple of times.

  • And I think if it was said to you on, then it might be able t o help you get your point across in a backs away.

  • I saw Lily Pebbles say something on Twitter the other days that you shouldn't have to know what someone is going through.

  • In order to be kind to that person.

  • You should just be kind to people, no matter what.

  • On Dhe, I think that's quite profound.

  • To be honest, I really took that onboard.

  • So yeah, that's my approach now, so I'm know I'm done pretending like the negativity doesn't affect me because it has done.

  • But I'm now in a space where I'm able to kind of see it what it is on DDE.

  • It doesn't hurt me as much when I read nasty comments about myself, sometimes I can have a laugh and a joke about it and not take it as that's who I am because I think that's what I was doing.

  • People were saying things, and it was making me think that Oh my God, I must be a horrible person because that person says I'm a horrible person on DDE I don't think that many people So, yeah, it was like a different take on it.

  • Watch.

  • Previous previous videos of you have come a long way from that.

  • So, yeah, I was saying that this video no longer wear a question.

  • One on 11 minutes in.

  • Oh, dear Lydia.

  • Question number two.

  • Now, I have a lot of questions about friendships in the online You chief space and there were a couple of names thrown in there.

  • Are you still friends with this person?

  • Does this person hate you on in this kind of instance, I wouldn't ever bring someone's name on my channel without asking their permission.

  • So I'm going to, like, speak about this in a general way on dhe.

  • Hopefully that maybe makes things a bit more like understand, understandable throat.

  • What?

  • So yeah, it was a lot of questions, like, Does this person hate you?

  • Does this person hate you?

  • Are you friends with this person?

  • Are you still friends with this person on DDE?

  • I've learned a lot about friendship over the last year.

  • I would say on DDE, Carrie has this really amazing saying that she told me the other day, That's basically a friend.

  • Friendship is either for a reason, a season or a lifetime and what that means to me.

  • You know, preacher, it means to most people, is that there are friendships that come in to your life for different reasons.

  • On some of those friendships will be forever on.

  • Some of those friendships will have, like a lesson attached to it, and you'll learn something from it.

  • And it won't just be for nothing on dhe.

  • Some of those friendships just they're not meant.

  • Thio withstand the test of time, and they're not meant to be forever, but they're just, you know, it was a lovely time in your life, and that was that on Dhe.

  • I don't welcome negativity or drama into anything that I do.

  • That's not something that I go in search off on.

  • It isn't something that I want to ever be apart off.

  • So if for any reason friendships don't work out or relationships change that something that is not for me, it's never on bad terms.

  • And it's not any means Thio.

  • You know, there's just no reason to, like burn bridges or anything like that.

  • So I'm able to see the friendships for what they are, the benefits and the good things that they brought to my life.

  • At that time.

  • I'm also able to acknowledge the friendships that are here forever on DDE.

  • That's kind of, um, it's kind of my take on it.

  • My guess is that I just know when a friendship is forever and I know when a friendship is not forever on DDE, I don't fall out with people.

  • I don't, you know, have a go people.

  • I'm no horrible to people on dhe.

  • I don't ever feel like there needs to be like a huge thing that happens.

  • I know that the YouTube, but the moment is going through a bit of a time where there is a lot of drama and there is a off out that states more so in the American market in the UK, I don't know whether we're I don't really ever see anything from the UK in that sense, on Dhe, this is a channel that's about like my life on dhe, my love of fashion and my love of stuff on my home.

  • Andi, It's not a drama tattle on their channels that you can go watch those channels and become even.

  • I've watched them.

  • Sometimes I like that I wow, but this is not what that is.

  • And so I know people want that to be, but t and drama sometimes.

  • But they can't me drama where there isn't drama on DDE.

  • So, yeah, basically, I just think that saying is such a good one.

  • When friendships are either here for a reason, a season or lifetime, that really did put things into perspective that no, everything is meant.

  • No, every person is meant to be in your life.

  • And yeah, I like it on in terms of like falling out with people, just people hate eat with people.

  • Not likely again.

  • No names, like mentioned that I haven't asked, you know, if they if they could be spoken about in this sense in my channel, I'm sure there are lots people that maybe don't like what I do or don't like me or just don't like my vied on dhe.

  • That's fine.

  • But you're never going to please all of the people of the time.

  • You could try to please some of the people some of the time on dhe.

  • That's okay, but there are always gonna be people that don't like me on Dhe.

  • Hopefully, they'll change their minds when they get to know me.

  • But you know, I'm quite good, but it's yeah, it's one of those things that if you think that they don't like me, maybe late, maybe they don't.

  • But you know, that's up to then Andi.

  • Hopefully that will change on hope has changed, and as I don't we could move reward from things.

  • But yet there's This is no the kind of thing that I would ever welcome into my like space as such.

  • So I hate that the hundreds of questions that I received on both of those things, like whether people dislike me or whether I fought it out with people.

  • I heard that kind of answers my stance on on that and just makes you realize there's never gonna be any tea unless I'm spilling tea about myself.

  • I'm never disability about someone else.

  • If they want to spell t about me as well didn't do it one of my videos, but yet so that's the question carefully done inducted.

  • Next.

  • Could you talk a bit more about coming off your pill on how it's helped you?

  • So I've spoken about my blog's about my struggles with my period on my hormones around that time of the month on being on the pill.

  • All my goodness, I think I realized kind of late last year that my kill is just like it was making me someone like I know that I was really struggling with that on it.

  • I feel so sorry, honey.

  • Sometimes, cause he just you can't understand the way that it makes me feel.

  • But I really, really, really have struggled with it, and I still struggle with it now that I'm off the pill.

  • But it was really bad when I was on the pill and basically I had and had the coil for awhile.

  • Years, years, years ago on the oil was one of the most horrific experiences of my life.

  • I would periods were just Oh my goodness, like icon Pinto What?

  • How bad they were.

  • I would convulse on the floor.

  • I would pass out.

  • Honestly, it felt like someone was tearing my insides out.

  • It was such I like, honestly, I feel like I'm scarred from it from how bad that waas on I when I had it removed.

  • It literally stops like that.

  • But obviously, as a 27 year old, I needed to be on a form of contraception.

  • I mean, I always had a long term boyfriend, so I've never really gone through, like, promiscuous sex, side of things.

  • But not that there's anything wrong with it.

  • Until it was just something I never went through on Dhe.

  • So I went on the pill a cz Well, I have to go hand in hand when I was on real acting, and unfortunately I don't react well.

  • Thio most pills.

  • So I was getting quite bad heart palpitations, which is quite scary.

  • Don't want anything happening with your heart.

  • Basically on.

  • So I tried about three pills, and then they put me on Jasmine.

  • And yes, it was okay.

  • Was the best out of a bad bunch.

  • Basically, I was very kind of ready, get heart palpitations, and they would just kind of be like one or two on Dhe.

  • I could kind of be okay with that, but my moved on that.

  • It just made me so happy.

  • And so my fuse was so sure.

  • I have zero patience on it was just Yeah, I realized that I wanted to come off that Unfortunately, when I first came off it, I suffer quite badly.

  • And I did experience quite a lot of hand offs on it.

  • Don't anyone would have noticed other than me.

  • But I did notice that my heaven very, very thin on dhe I looked back, pictures out.

  • I can see it.

  • I don't think that it would have been noticed by anyone else.

  • Made me.

  • I think I came off, and then I My skin broke out really badly, and it made me panic.

  • So I like.

  • Is that he went straight back on on Dhe.

  • I think I was over another six months, but it just all of the feelings The emotions came back.

  • I just need to get office and lucky.

  • Luckily, I didn't experience the head us again on dhe.

  • Now I've been off for God.

  • It must be nearly a year.

  • I've been a bit now on DDE.

  • I'm so happy just so, so happy that I'm not on it.

  • My period doesn't mean that I struggle with on when it comes to that time of month, I will break house.

  • I'm just kind of on the back end of a breakout Now on my skin is like, kind of on the mend from it.

  • But it's more like the emotional side of things that I struggle with.

  • And it has.

  • I have actually had a time when it's been that time of month where I have even felt like hopeless, and I've never, ever felt hopeless in my life.

  • Like that's not an emotion I've ever felt so lucky.

  • I was able to quite like it knowledge that that was because I was having a particularly bad period on DDE boy.

  • Um I knew that that was actually the way that I was feeling.

  • That was my emotions, making me feel that way at my hormones, making you feel that way.

  • Sorry on Yes.

  • Oh, I struggle with it quite a lot.

  • And I would love to look into more ways to ensure that I don't feel that way at the time of the month.

  • But that's I just happened to be at this point where I don't feel like that all of the time.

  • Which is kind of how I felt when I was on.

  • Yes, but I wasn't like, this is this is this is like a movement, like a lot of people are a little like blowing out coming away from artificial hormone contraceptions and trying to find other ways.

  • Thio kind of cope with contraception and not wanting Thio to get pregnant and also how it makes them feel.

  • So hopefully this gives you a little bit of insight into that.

  • Okay, next question.

  • Have you have a thought that you are not good enough?

  • How do you cope with that feeling?

  • I say that I think that probably everyone has felt like that At some point in time.

  • I don't necessarily think that I feel like I'm no good enough.

  • I have a thing about feeling like I'm not a very nice person.

  • Which is why, in the past I've struggled with negativity on mine because I would be like, Well, I already feel that I'm not a very nice person, so totally like hyper aware and hyper vigilant of anyone else thinking that I'm not a very nice person.

  • So that was why would struggle with that?

  • So that's my biggest thing is that I don't It's not that I feel good enough.

  • I just feel like I'm no good enough parts in I know a nice enough person on.

  • That's something that I, luckily been able to ignore interests in the end.

  • No, I'm on my own works enemy in those situations on.

  • To be honest with you, I would say, if that's something you're feeling on, you feel like it's something you feel a little bit more than you.

  • Maybe should, um, that I would suggest that from my personal experience that speaking someone about is probably the best way to break down those feelings and understand why you feel that way on that.

  • It's you know it's something that you can work through and begin to understand.

  • Like I feel like a lead, a different person to who I was like two months ago.

  • Now I understand why I felt that way and how that came about on.

  • I, although still feel like Oh, you know, when people meet me, don't think I'm not a very nice person and they won't like me.

  • I'm able to understand it a little bit more, Maybe put those worries to one side and ensure that I'm putting me across in the way.

  • I won't need to be put across rather than letting those feelings come to the surface on dhe kind of rule over my social situations rather than just being myself, being calm and not worrying about anything.

  • So, yeah, that would be like my best advice on that would be to just take some time out, find someone that you are able to talk to.

  • I don't always say is probably good to have someone like unbiased, completely out of your life has no idea about what you do or anything like that.

  • Just having that unbiased, neutral opinion on things is quite valuable.

  • So yes, That would be how I suggest you do.

  • Anyway, I've got four questions into this, and I'm already on 26 minutes off static, so I'm not gonna go to the fifth question on this, but hopefully you enjoyed this video.

  • As much as I enjoyed filming this one on the last one.

  • And hopefully I can do more of these kinds of videos where I talk about these subjects that maybe I haven't spoken about before.

  • So I hope that you have found this informative on it.

  • You know, if there's anything else that you would like me to ask, please, that has take to put it in the comments on I always ask these kinds of things on Twitter on instagram story as well.

  • How you doing?

  • If you haven't subscribed, do hit subscribe button on Dhe.

  • I would love to have you back here for more.

  • Andi.

  • Yeah, You're my next one.

  • Thanks.

  • Fine.

Hi, everyone, and welcome back to my channel on Welcome back to another video In today's video, I kind of wanted to do the same kind of thing I did a couple of weeks ago on dhe.

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灑更多的茶!| 米倫 (SPILLING MORE TEA! | Lydia Elise Millen)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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