parental
US /pəˈrɛntl:/
・UK /pəˈrentl/
B1 中級
adj.形容詞父母的
I had a lot of parental support during my final exams, they told me to only study
影片字幕
心靈的傷，身體會記住 (The Body Keeps the Score)
- "How to Overcome Your Childhood" is a book that teaches us how character is developed, the concept of emotional inheritance, the formation of our concepts of being good or bad, and the impact of parental styles of love on the way we choose adult partners.
《如何克服你的童年》這本書告訴我們性格形成的過程、情感遺傳的概念、我們對好壞概念的形成，以及父母愛的方式對我們選擇伴侶有何影響。
- the impact of parental styles of love on the way we choose adult partners.
研究證實「阿嬤」這個生物真的很奇妙！ (Evolution Can't Explain Your Grandma)
- And while they do continue to live with their sons, remember, there's that whole parental uncertainty thing.
儘管他們確實繼續與兒子住在一起，但請記住，父母的不確定性是存在的。
- there's that whole parental uncertainty thing.
父母的不確定性。
人生課題：關於我們又愛又恨的自尊心 (Self-Esteem)
- But it's not so easy running around your whole lifelong desperate to put out the raging fires of self-hatred, striving to impress everyone you meet in search of an unsatisfied desire for a parental approval you never knew.
你也許在非常優越的環境長大
- striving to impress everyone you meet in search of an unsatisfied desire for a parental approval you never knew.
努力讓大家對自己有好印象，因為你從來沒有得到父母的認同過
為什麼不被愛的人會憎恨自己？ (Why Unloved People Hate Themselves)
- It doesn't ask, "What is wrong with my parents for not loving me adequately?" It simply wonders, in a forlorn way, "What have I done wrong in order to have ended up on the receiving end of my parents' disapproval?" The child prefers to attack itself for being bad than to confront a yet more awful possibility - that it is entirely dependent for its well-being on inadequate and unkind parental figures.
它只是悵然若失地想，我到底做錯了什麼，以至於最終遭到父母的反對？
- The child prefers to attack itself for being bad than to confront a yet more awful possibility that it's entirely dependent for its well-being on inadequate and unkind parental figures.
孩子寧願攻擊自己不好，也不願面對更可怕的可能性，即自己的幸福完全依賴於不稱職、不近人情的父母。
為了逃避愛，我們能有多拼命？！ (The Lengths We Go To Avoid Love)
- Or perhaps our parental figure was constantly at the office or unavailable behind a locked study door. They might have had a violent, unpredictable temper or left us somehow feeling that we were just never good enough for them. As a result, to an extent we may not even have realised, we became experts at independence. We came to associate safety with a high degree of self-protective isolation. We might have become big readers or fascinated by the animal world or obsessed with music or computer games. Without quite knowing we had done so, we learnt never to trust a flesh-and-blood, three-dimensional human again. Our experiences may not have affected the strength of our longing for love, but they have heavily impacted our capacity to endure mutually satisfying relationships. We may now, as adults, tell ourselves that we want closeness and surrender. We will sob sincerely when we lose love, but we are continually taking steps to ensure we will never be at any sustained risk of finding it. The true terror for us is not that love should fail, but that it should, by some oversight on our part, succeed. For this would ask of us a level of defencelessness and exposure to another person and to a chance of happiness that has no precedent in our lives and poses immense, ego-shattering challenges to the armoured way our personalities have been structured.
又或者，我們的父母常年在辦公室，或者在緊鎖的書房門後無暇顧及我們。他們可能脾氣暴躁、難以捉摸，或者讓我們莫名其妙地覺得自己永遠配不上他們。是以，在某種程度上，我們甚至沒有意識到，我們成了獨立專家。我們開始將安全與高度的自我保護隔離聯繫在一起。我們可能變得喜歡閱讀，對動物世界著迷，對音樂或電腦遊戲著迷。在不知不覺中，我們學會了不再信任有血有肉、立體的人類。我們的經歷也許並沒有影響我們對愛的渴望，但卻嚴重影響了我們維持相互滿意的關係的能力。作為成年人，我們現在可能會告訴自己，我們想要親近和屈服。當我們失去愛情
- If we find ourselves in a relationship, we will assiduously practice the arts of what psychologists call distance management. When the chance of reaching a truly happy state appears, we'll subtly discover ways to introduce a chasm. We'll have an argument, spoil a birthday, ruin a holiday. We'll find we have to do a lot of work for an upcoming exam or presentation, that our gang of friends needs us to be somewhere else, that we forgot to return the credit card or tax bill, that our appearance requires a lot of our attention or that we like to flirt with a stranger at a party who suddenly seems very attractive indeed. In both tiny and large ways, we'll know just how to lower the mood, scupper a bond and destroy trust. Perhaps not enough to end a relationship completely, but certainly enough to worry our partner sufficiently as to our solidity that we can be privately sure things will never truly fly. Friends may commiserate with us on our so-called bad luck. Psychologists will note our superlative skill at romantic sabotage. With this to sound a bit like us, compassion is required. We should reflect back on our pasts and wonder at the connection between our fractured bonds with parental figures and our disrupted adult attachments. We aren't like this because we're wicked, we've just been very badly hurt. Once we understand how our skill at independence was acquired, we'll be in a better position to see that it has in reality outlived its rationale. We may still feel immensely apprehensive at the prospect of contentment, but we may finally be able to admit that we are, first and foremost, acting out of fear. Rather than dismissing our partners, we may stick closer to a much more awkward truth – that we're tempted to draw away from them because we're immensely scared that they might finally be in a position to make us very happy – and that simply nothing so unutterably and boundlessly frightening has ever happened to us before.
如果我們發現自己處於一段關係中，我們就會孜孜不倦地練習心理學家所說的距離管理藝術。當達到真正幸福狀態的機會出現時，我們會巧妙地發現引入鴻溝的方法。我們會發生爭執，破壞生日，毀掉節日。我們會發現我們必須為即將到來的考試或演講做大量的工作，我們的一幫朋友需要我們去別的地方，我們忘了歸還信用卡或稅單，我們的外表需要我們大量的關注，或者我們喜歡在聚會上與一個陌生人調情，而這個陌生人突然看起來確實非常有吸引力。不管是小事還是大事，我們都知道如何降低情緒、破壞關係、摧毀信任。也許還不足以徹底結束一段關係，但肯定足以讓