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maltreated
US
・UK
C2 高級
v.t.及物動詞虐待
Her employer maltreated her and would not allow her to go home
影片字幕
為什麼我們不能停止愛那些傷害我們的人 (Why We Can't Stop Loving Those Who Hurt Us)
- We don't need to think more about their psychology than they care to. We need to look very closely at what they do, not why they might be as they are. And conversely, despite our nausea, we don't need to keep holding it against certain others that they are kind, there is nothing wrong with them for being sweet, there is something very sad about our past that we are so easily sickened by their manner. If this sounds like us, we urgently need to tell ourselves that the person who has maltreated us or is maltreating us will never change. Our boundless hope that they might is not rooted in any reality. It's the legacy of a childhood which obliged us to keep faith with people who no free person should ever have had to keep faith with. There is one and only one criterion that determines whether we should be with someone. Whether or not they are kind to us. If they were but are no longer, we need to leave. If they are only a small percentage of the time, we need to leave. If they show a promise of kindness but no delivery, we need to leave. We need to break our addiction to a suffering that we were not owed then and definitely don't deserve now.
我們不需要過多地考慮他們的心理。我們需要仔細觀察他們的所作所為，而不是他們為什麼會這樣。反過來說，儘管我們感到噁心，但我們也不需要一直對某些人抱有偏見，因為他們是善良的，他們的可愛並沒有錯，我們的過去有一些非常可悲的東西，讓我們如此容易被他們的舉止噁心到。如果這聽起來像我們的想法，我們迫切需要告訴自己，曾經或正在虐待我們的人永遠不會改變。我們對他們可能會改變的無限希望並非植根於現實。這是童年留下的後遺症，童年讓我們不得不相信那些自由人都不應該相信的人。決定我們是否應該與某人在一起的標準有且只有一個。他們是
你是天之驕子嗎？一起認識「金童症候群」(The Golden Child Syndrome)
- We may wind up mentally unwell not so much because we were ignored or maltreated but because we were loved with a distinctive and troubling over-intensity.
我們精神出狀況的原因不見得是因為我們曾經被忽視或糟糕對到，而是因為我們曾經以獨特且強到造成困擾的方式被愛。
- up mentally unwell not so much because we
were ignored or maltreated but because we
在精神上不舒服，並不是因為我們。 被忽視或虐待，但因為我們是
極端的神經科學從無情的心理變態到非凡的慷慨 | 阿比蓋爾-馬什 (The neuroscience of extremes: Ruthless psychopathy to extraordinary generosity | Abigail Marsh)
- And I think it's a really pernicious myth that the only way to end up psychopathic is if you were abused or maltreated as a child, because many families of children who end up psychopathic are too ashamed to come forward with their problems because they assume everybody will blame them.
我認為這是一個非常有害的神話，認為只有在孩童時期受到虐待或摧殘，才會導致心理變態，因為許多最終導致心理變態的兒童的家庭都羞於面對他們的問題，因為他們認為每個人都會責怪他們。
