B2 中高級 澳洲腔 2378 分類 收藏
Okey dokey, it's time to get amongst the common people and see what's happening in the world of transport.
What do we have here?
There's a bloke that's trying to board a train in India and he's ended up getting a free crowd surfing experience.
He wasn't prepared to become Kurt Cobain, but there you go.
Overpopulation is one of those issues ya don't wanna think about.
But unfortunately, catching the train in the morning forces you to think about it.
Everyone here is like :"Please, there's no space, we are so delicately positioned. You're f**king messing everything up."
If you get rid of the bag, you can enter.
She's determined, though.
She fights for elbow space and she's in.
You will see homosapiens with strange hairstyles, especially on buses.
Don't stare though, just film it and put it on the internet.
If you see a mouse crawl into a Sheila's cleavage, no questions, it's all normal.
Normal is whatever you make it on public transport.
Many people catch up on sleep when riding the train, have empathy, let them rest, eventually they'll faceplant the floor and wake up.
Or you can let a subway rat inform them as to when their stop is coming up.
That bloke will never sleep peacefully again.
Hey, woah, hey, wah, woah...
Communication can break down between humans when they're confined to tight spaces.
Don't take it personally, just stay calm, focus on the end goal.
One day you will get off the train.
Some wankers treat shared spaces like a bedroom.
I'm an open-minded bloke, but yeah nah, keep the horniness to a minimum everyone.
Feet, you're gonna see feet, whether you like it or not, f**king feet.
You'll see more bare feet than you do in a Tarantino movie.
Because using public transport requires waking up early, you don't always have time for self-care at home, so f**king give your nose hair a trim during the commute.
This is a major advantage of not having a car.
There's a time traveling knight.
He's on a mission to retrieve modern clothes and take them back to the Middle Ages.
It's a basic research op.
There's Pennywise, definitely be careful staring at him.
There's a robot, he's waiting to meet up with the knight to exchange research notes.
This fella is like "no way is coronavirus f**king coming near me."
I dunno what this costume is.
It's gotta be an original one.
It's not an Avenger.
No way.
Someone has shed their entire skin.
That is as gross as trimming your nose hair or cutting your toenails.
Free live music is a huge perk of using public transport.
He is loving it.
(playing guitar and singing)
Actually he's thinking "I better get my f**king car back from the mechanic tomorrow."
You're not gonna get any work done on a train.
Quit pretending.
Quit pretending you're being productive to shame the rest of us.
Just sit there like everyone else.
You can sleep, you can suck a face, cut ya bloody toenails, I don't care, but do not pretend to work.
That is the worst behaviour.
Oh yeah everyone thinks they're an acrobat on the handrails, don't they?
Yeah nah what a backflip!
Nailed it mate.
Spiderman is the only one that can get away with doing cool moves in a carriage.
Yeah, go Spidey, it's ya birthday.
Gonna party like it's ya birthday.
Ok, this guy can get away with it too.
That's all.
Yeah this is quality free entertainment.
When public transport entertainers nail it, they genuinely nail it.
There's a pair of undies, and a couple of empty mini bottles of whiskey.
There's a story.
There's a story here and your best bet is to never know that story.



通勤怪人何其多 奇葩人類二三事 (Ozzy Man Reviews: Public Transport)

2378 分類 收藏
lauren.huang 發佈於 2020 年 2 月 19 日    lauren.huang 翻譯    adam 審核
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