Name: 【喜劇】 測謊機 (Lie Detector)
Uploaded: 2014-03-24T18:14:49.000Z
Duration: 3 min 13 s

As you know we have all prospective employees take a lie detector test prior to joining our firm.

如你所知，我們會在候選的新員工加入前為他們測謊

So if you don’t mind we're going to begin with a couple of control questions.

那，如果你不介意的話，我們先來幾個測試性問題

我是不是該被連接上什麼東西呢?

如果是用舊系統的話，那麼是的

But with the new Lie Detector 3000, it's programmed to go off when it hears you tell a lie.

但要是用的是新型的測謊機3000，這台機器則是被設定成聽到謊言時就會響起

For example, go ahead and tell an obvious lie.

我超愛那一齣的，從沒錯過任何一集

Now go ahead and say something that is true so we can properly calibrate the machine.

現在說一些絕對的實話，這樣我們才能把機器校準好

我的弟弟有十二英吋長(一英吋等於2.54 公分)

That’s kind of weird, it should have gone off.

Hey Mike, did you get a chance to email me those mission statements?

嘿，Mike，你有空把那些專案文件寄給我嗎?

You suck. I’ll be back at my desk working.

你爛死了，我會在我的位子上辦公

I’ll be playing Angry Birds on my phone.

Is it true you that reside at 1444 North Sierra Bonita Avenue?

你是真的住在北敘利亞伯尼塔大道1444號嗎?

Oh, when I moved here I went on Westside Rentals.

喔，我剛搬到那邊時，我去找了西域不動產

No, how do you live with a twelve-inch penis. I mean, how is that even possible?

不，你有條12英寸的弟弟是要怎麼生活，我是說，這怎麼可能?

Okay, I’m getting a little uncomfortable with this line of questioning.

嗯，我開始對這種詢問用語感到有點不舒服了

I mean it’s just that twelve-inches, that is like a freaking beef bus! You know what I’m sayin’?

我是說十二英吋耶，那真是一條嚇人的大傢伙!你懂我意思吧?

Why are you- why are you so concerned about my penis anyhow? I mean, are you gay or something?

你為什麼-幹嘛那麼關心我的弟弟啊?你是同性戀還是怎樣?

All right. I'm a flaming homosexual. But do me a favor?

好啦，我承認我是GAY中之GAY，不過幫我個忙好嗎?

不要跟別人說，因為他們都不知道

Have you ever been fired from a job before?

Have you ever stolen from an employer before?

How much would you say you've stolen before?

I'm going to be honest, Dane. This interview is going really well.

我老實說吧， Dane，這次面試非常順利

No. This is the worst interview I’ve ever been a part of.

不，這是我參與過最糟糕的面試了

如果是一般情況下，你早就該走人了

However, company policy dictates I ask you one final question.

但是，由於公司政策規定，我必須再問你最後一個問題

Would you ever have sex with a man in order to get a job?

你會為了工作跟一個男人上床嗎?

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【喜劇】測謊機 (Lie Detector)

lie

firm

interview

flame

【喜劇】 測謊機 (Lie Detector)

lie

firm

interview

flame

【喜劇】測謊機 (Lie Detector)