It's nice and thin.

很好，很薄。

Yeah, liver tones maybe?

是啊，可能是肝音？

I sense trout.

我感覺到鱒魚。

Tastes like water.

味道像水。

So how do you feel about water?

那麼你對水的感覺如何呢？

- I love it. - You drink water.

- 我喜歡它。- 你喝水。

I drink it all day.

我整天都在喝。

I like Dasani, it tastes like minerals.

我喜歡大沙尼，它的味道像礦物質。

I've drank water in all its forms, tap water, toilet water, sink water.

我喝過各種形式的水，自來水、馬桶水、水槽水。

Pool water.

池水。

I'll drink it.

我喝了它。

What flavors do you like in water?

你喜歡什麼口味的水？

I like plain.

我喜歡普通的。

I feel like when it comes to water, I just kinda take what I can get. - Yeah.

我覺得當涉及到水的時候，我只是有點拿什麼我可以得到。- 是啊 Yeah.

- And if I can afford a Voss, honestly I'm more surprised - Go for it?

- 而如果我買得起沃斯，說實話，我比較驚訝--加油？

- I can afford a Voss.

- 我買得起佛斯的車

- So we have three different brands, the cheapest being Dasani, the middle point Fiji water, and the highest price is Voss.

- 所以我們有三個不同的品牌，最便宜的是達薩尼，中間點斐濟水，價格最高的是沃斯。

- Well, you're a Dasani fan, so this should be pretty easy for you.

- 好吧，你是一個Dasani的粉絲，所以這應該是很容易為你。

Let's see how rich we are.

讓我們看看我們有多有錢。

This one's got a lot of bubbles.

這個有很多保麗龍。

Smells like water.

聞起來像水的味道。

Ah.

啊。

Okay, tastes like water.

好吧，嚐起來像水。

The bubbles I thought would be chaos.

保麗龍我以為會很混亂。

-But it's very calm. - It's bringing you peace.

-但它很平靜.- 它給你帶來了平靜.

Number two.

二號

Cheers.

乾杯。

Ooh, she's flat but she's foreign.

哦，她是平的，但她是外國的。

- This one's good. - This one has a slightly different taste at the end.

- 這個不錯。- 這個最後的味道略有不同。

This one's yummy.

這個很好吃。

She's traveled.

她旅行過。

Like she went through her 20s.

就像她經歷了20多歲。

Last one.

最後一個。

Cheers.

乾杯。

I almost tried to sniff it.

我差點就想聞一聞了。

That's Dasani.

那是Dasani.

I now realize I don't quite know what Dasani tastes like, despite my love of it.

我現在意識到，我不太知道大沙尼是什麼味道，儘管我很喜歡它。

That's some nasty Dasani, for sure.

那是一些討厭的達薩尼，肯定的。

You know, they all kinda taste the same.

你知道，它們的味道都是一樣的。

There's like an after taste to this one.

這個就像一個餘味。

Deedee from the block.

Deedee從街區。

You think this is the Dasani?

你以為這就是大薩尼？

She's your neighborhood girl.

她是你的鄰家女孩。

You probably dated her in high school, broke up with her, she'll still write poetry about you at the local poetry slam.

你可能在高中時和她約會過，和她分手過，她還會在當地的詩歌大賽上寫關於你的詩。

If that's the Dasani I'm gonna walk out of here violently.

如果那是達薩尼，我就會暴力地離開這裡。

- I actually feel like this one might be Dasani.

- 其實我覺得這個可能是大沙尼。

- Now they all taste bad because of the Dasani.

- 現在它們的味道都不好，因為大薩尼的緣故。

I also recognize I'm gonna look like a complete fool if this isn't Dasani, but I'm putting all my eggs in this basket.

我也認識到如果這不是Dasani 我就會像個傻子一樣 但我把所有的雞蛋都放在這個籃子裡。

The Voss would come from a glass bottle, which I feel like doesn't give it any flavor.

沃斯會從玻璃瓶裡出來，我覺得沒有任何味道。

I think that's why it would be the flattest.

我想這就是為什麼它會是最平的。

I thought I knew water, but I don't.

我以為我懂水，但我不懂。

This one tastes the most crisp, and I'd like to think that expensive water is good water, because it's harvested from the mountains of I don't know, Mount Fiji, whatever's a nice mountain.

這個味道最清脆，我倒是覺得貴的水是好水，因為它是從我不知道的斐濟山的山上採來的，不管是什麼好山。

Fiji, Voss, Dasani.

斐濟、沃斯、達薩尼。

Fiji, Dasani, Voss.

斐濟、達薩尼、沃斯。

This is Voss, this is Fiji, this is Dasani.

這裡是佛斯，這裡是斐濟，這裡是達薩尼。

Voss, Dasani, Fiji.

Voss, Dasani, Fiji.

Voss, Fiji, Dasani.

沃斯、斐濟、達薩尼。

You guys got 'em all wrong.

你們把他們都弄錯了。

- No! - Dang it!

- 不！- 該死的！

The first one was Dasani.

第一個是達薩尼。

Oh, fuck.

哦，他媽的。

So embarrassing.

只是尷尬。

Dasani.

達薩尼。

So why does Voss taste like that?

那麼為什麼沃斯的味道是這樣的呢？

I don't know.

我不知道。

I feel like it should taste the most like nothing.

我覺得它的味道應該是最像沒有的。

It has like a cardboard taste to it, like essence of box.

它有像紙板的味道，像盒子的本質。

Deedee, you were the girl I liked at high school, baby, but I'm coming back.

Deedee，你是我高中時喜歡的女孩，寶貝，但我會回來的。

Fiji's nice too though.

不過斐濟也不錯。

- Yes. - I'll give it that.

- 是的，我同意。

I mean, I chugged it so I don't remember what it taste like.

我的意思是，我喝了它，所以我不記得它是什麼味道。

Mostly like water.

多半像水一樣。

So both of these are like bleh.

所以，這兩個都是像bleh。

I think they're all great, I think all water brands are great, you just too damn overpriced.

我覺得他們都很好，我覺得所有的水品牌都很好，你就是太他媽高價了。

I'm angry that I got that so wrong.

我很生氣，因為我弄錯了。

I'd still pick Dasani, I'd buy the cheapest one.

我還是會選大薩尼，我會買最便宜的。

I'm not gonna shell out for expensive water.

我不會為昂貴的水掏錢的。

I drink tap water, it's fine.

我喝的是自來水，挺好的。

I still think Dasani hands down is the best tasting bottled water that there is.

我還是覺得大山尼是最美味的瓶裝水，有。

Honestly, all water tastes the same.

說實話，所有水的味道都是一樣的。

Aqua tastes like water.

水的味道像水。

Unless it's really expensive, then it's got some weird aftertaste to it.

除非真的很貴，否則就會有一些奇怪的回味。

I was really confused by that, she was trying to be foreign.

我真的被她弄糊塗了，她是想做外國人。

But we all knew that lace front was showing.

但我們都知道，蕾絲前面是露出來的。