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  • Some of you have heard the story before,

    有人應該已經聽過這個故事了,

  • but, in fact, there's somebody in the audience

    但在座各位可能還沒有聽過這個故事,

  • who's never heard this story -- in front of an audience -- before,

    我也從來未曾對聽眾講過這個故事,

  • so I'm a little more nervous than I normally am telling this story.

    所以這讓我比以往在講述這個故事時還要緊張。

  • I used to be a photographer for many years.

    我擔任攝影師很多年了,

  • In 1978, I was working for Time magazine,

    1978年時我受僱於時代雜誌,

  • and I was given a three-day assignment

    他們要我在三天的時間內,

  • to photograph Amerasian children,

    拍攝出一些美裔亞洲孩童的相片,

  • children who had been fathered by American GIs

    這些孩子的父親都是美國大兵,

  • all over Southeast Asia, and then abandoned --

    他們散佈在東南亞,全都被父親遺棄了,

  • 40,000 children all over Asia.

    全亞洲總計有4萬人之多。

  • I had never heard the word Amerasian before.

    以前我從未聽過美裔亞洲人這個名詞,

  • I spent a few days photographing children in different countries,

    我在幾個不同國家花了幾天時間為這些孩子照相,

  • and like a lot of photographers and a lot of journalists,

    就像其他的攝影師或記者一樣,

  • I always hope that when my pictures were published,

    我也希望當我的照片被登出來時,

  • they might actually have an effect on a situation,

    或許能改變一點現狀,

  • instead of just documenting it.

    而不僅僅只是記錄這件事而已。

  • So, I was so disturbed by what I saw,

    我對我所看到的景像感到困惑,

  • and I was so unhappy with the article that ran afterwards,

    對於後來搭配照片的文章也感到不快,

  • that I decided I would take six months off.

    所以我決定停職六個月,

  • I was 28 years old.

    那時我才28歲。

  • I decided I would find six children in different countries,

    我決定,我要在不同的國家找到6個孩子,

  • and actually go spend some time with the kids,

    多花一點時間與他們相處,

  • and try to tell their story a little bit better

    報導這些孩子們的故事,

  • than I thought I had done for Time magazine.

    而且要比之前為時代雜誌所做的報導更為深入。

  • In the course of doing the story,

    為了要報導這個故事,

  • I was looking for children who hadn't been photographed before,

    我得找一個以前從來沒有被人報導過的小孩,

  • and the Pearl Buck Foundation told me

    而遺珠基金會告訴我,

  • that they worked with a lot of Americans who were

    他們與一些曾捐錢資助

  • donating money to help some of these kids.

    這些孩子的美國人一起合作,

  • And a man told me, who ran the Pearl Buck Foundation in Korea,

    其中一個在韓國為遺珠基金會工作的人告訴我,

  • that there was a young girl, who was 11 years old, being raised by her grandmother.

    有一個小女孩那時已經11歲了,由她的外婆扶養長大,

  • And the grandmother had never let any Westerners ever see her.

    她外婆從不曾讓任何西方人接近她,

  • Every time any Westerners came to the village, she hid the girl.

    每次只要有西方人去到這個村落,外婆就把女孩藏起來。

  • And of course, I was immediately intrigued.

    這立刻就引起我的好奇心,

  • I saw photographs of her, and I thought I wanted to go.

    我看到這女孩的照片,也決定要報導這女孩的故事。

  • And the guy just told me, "There's no way. This grandmother won't even -- you know,

    那人只說:「沒辦法,她外婆甚至不讓...

  • there's no way she's ever going to let you meet this girl that's she's raising."

    她外婆不會讓你見她親手帶大的外孫女的。」

  • I took a translator with me, and went to this village,

    我帶了一位翻譯前去那個村落,

  • found the grandmother, sat down with her.

    找到那位外婆,坐下來和她談,

  • And to my astonishment, she agreed to let me

    但出乎我意料之外,

  • photograph her granddaughter.

    外婆同意讓我為女孩拍照。

  • And I was paying for this myself, so I asked the translator

    因為我這趟是由自己出資去的,所以我便問那翻譯,

  • if it would be OK if I stayed for the week.

    問我是否能在那裡待上一個星期。

  • I had a sleeping bag.

    我有自備睡袋,

  • The family had a small shed on the side of the house,

    那家人在房子旁邊有個小棚,

  • so I said, "Could I sleep in my sleeping bag in the evenings?"

    所以我問:「晚上是否可以讓我睡在睡袋裡?」

  • And I just told the little girl, whose name was Hyun-Sook Lee,

    那女孩的名叫李賢淑,雖然她長得很像美國人,

  • that if I ever did anything to embarrass her --

    但她卻不會說英語,

  • she didn't speak a word of English, although she looked very American --

    所以我告訴她,如果我做了什麼她不喜歡的事,

  • she could just put up her hand and say, "Stop,"

    可以把手舉起來說「Stop(停止)」,

  • and I would stop taking pictures.

    這樣我就知道不要再幫她拍照了。

  • And then, my translator left.

    我的翻譯接著就離開了,

  • So there I was, I couldn't speak a word of Korean,

    留下我一個人,連一句韓語也不會講,

  • and this is the first night I met Hyun-Sook.

    那時我才第一次見到賢淑。

  • Her mother was still alive.

    她的母親還在世,

  • Her mother was not raising her, her grandmother was raising her.

    但沒有扶養她,而是由外婆扶養。

  • And what struck me immediately was

    我馬上就感受到

  • how in love the two of these people were.

    這二人間親密的親情,

  • The grandmother was incredibly fond, deeply in love with this little girl.

    外婆很溺愛這個小外孫女。

  • They slept on the floor at night.

    晚上她們睡在地板上,

  • The way they heat their homes in Korea is to put bricks under the floors,

    韓國人會在地板下鋪磚塊,

  • so the heat actually radiates from underneath the floor.

    暖氣就會從地板下散放出來。

  • Hyun-Sook was 11 years old.

    那時賢淑才11歲,

  • I had photographed, as I said, a lot of these kids.

    我幫這些孩子們拍了很多照片,

  • Hyun-Sook was in fact the fifth child that I found to photograph.

    賢淑是我所拍攝的主題的第5個孩子。

  • And almost universally, amongst all the kids,

    這些孩子在全世界都一樣,

  • they were really psychologically damaged by

    都成為別人捉弄、嘲笑的對象,不被認同,

  • having been made fun of, ridiculed, picked on and been rejected.

    因此心靈大受傷害;

  • And Korea was probably the place I found

    而我覺得這些孩子

  • to be the worst for these kids.

    在韓國生活得更加艱苦。

  • And what struck me immediately in meeting Hyun-Sook

    我立刻就發現,

  • was how confident she appeared to be,

    賢淑是一個很有自信的孩子,

  • how happy she seemed to be in her own skin.

    她也十分能接受自己。

  • And remember this picture,

    請記住這張照片,

  • because I'm going to show you another picture later,

    因為待會兒我會給各位看另一張照片,

  • but you can see how much she looks like her grandmother,

    你可以看得出來她長得有多麼像她的外婆,

  • although she looks so Western.

    儘管她有著一張西方人的臉孔。

  • I decided to follow her to school.

    我決定跟著她到學校拍攝,

  • This is the first morning I stayed with her.

    這是我跟她到學校的第一天早上,

  • This is on the way to school.

    這是在上學途中,

  • This is the morning assembly outside her school.

    她們先在學校外面集合。

  • And I noticed that she was clowning around.

    我發現她很愛開玩笑。

  • When the teachers would ask questions,

    每當老師問問題的時候,

  • she'd be the first person to raise her hand.

    她總是第一個舉手回答,

  • Again, not at all shy or withdrawn,

    不會害羞也不孤僻,

  • or anything like the other children that I'd photographed.

    一點也不像我拍攝的其他小孩。

  • Again, the first one to go to the blackboard to answer questions.

    她也總是第一個跑上黑板寫出答案的小孩。

  • Getting in trouble for whispering into her best friend's ears

    她在課堂上和她最好的朋友咬耳朵,

  • in the middle of class.

    所以被處罰了。

  • And one of the other things that I said to her through the translator --

    和上次我教她說「停止」那件事一樣,

  • again, this thing about saying stop -- was to not pay attention to me.

    我也趁翻譯還在時請翻譯告訴她不要太在意我的拍攝,

  • And so, she really just completely ignored me most of the time.

    而她也就真的完全忽略我的存在。

  • I noticed that at recess, she was the girl

    我發現在下課時間,

  • who picked the other girls to be on her team.

    她負責挑選其他女孩到她的隊上,

  • It was very obvious, from the very beginning, that she was a leader.

    從一開始,她就表現得很明顯,她是領隊。

  • This is on the way home.

    這時回家時的照片。

  • And that's North Korea up along the hill.

    山的那一邊就是北韓,

  • This is up along the DMZ.

    這一邊是非軍事區,

  • They would actually cover the windows every night, so that light couldn't be seen,

    晚上大家都會把窗子遮蔽起來,以防光線外漏,

  • because the South Korean government has said for years

    因為南韓政府長年宣導

  • that the North Koreans may invade at any time.

    北韓可能隨時會進攻,

  • So there's always this -- the closer you were to North Korea, the more terrifying it was.

    所以愈靠近北韓,大家就愈恐懼。

  • Very often at school, I'd be taking pictures,

    我經常在學校幫她拍照,

  • and she would whisper into her girlfriends' ears,

    她會偷偷和另一個女孩咬耳朵,

  • and then look at me and say, "Stop."

    然後看著我說:「停止。」

  • And I would stand at attention, and all the girls would crack up,

    當我想知道發生什麼事時,其他女孩已經笑成一團,

  • and it was sort of a little joke.

    原來她是在作弄我。

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • The end of the week came and my translator came back,

    一個星期過去後,翻譯又回來了,

  • because I'd asked her to come back,

    因為我之前就有交代她要回來,

  • so I could formally thank the grandmother and Hyun-Sook.

    幫我好好謝謝賢淑和她外婆。

  • And in the course of the grandmother talking to the translator,

    但在翻譯和外婆溝通時,

  • the grandmother started crying.

    外婆哭了起來,

  • And I said to my translator, "What's going on, why is she crying?"

    我問翻譯:「怎麼回事?外婆為什麼要哭?」

  • And she spoke to the grandmother for a moment,

    翻譯又和外婆說了一陣子,

  • and then she started getting tears in her eyes.

    這下連翻譯也哭了起來,

  • And I said, "OK, what did I do? What's going on?

    我問:「這到底是怎麼回事?我到底做了什麼?

  • Why is everyone crying?"

    為什麼每個人都要哭?」

  • And the translator said, "The grandmother says

    翻譯說:「外婆說,

  • that she thinks she's dying,

    她覺得自己快死了,

  • and she wants to know if you would take Hyun-Sook to America with you."

    她想問你是不是可以把賢淑帶回美國?」

  • And I said, "I'm 28 years old, and I live in hotels,

    我說:「我才28歲,只在旅館暫時棲身,

  • and I'm not married."

    也還沒結婚。」

  • I mean I had fallen in love with this girl,

    我真的很喜歡賢淑,

  • but I -- you know, it was, like, emotionally I was about 12 years old.

    但這真的很不理性,就像個12歲小孩的表現一樣。

  • If you know of photographers, the joke is

    如果你瞭解攝影這一行,你就會知道

  • it's the finest form of delayed adolescence ever invented.

    為什麼大家都戲稱攝影師總是能把青春期無限延長:

  • "Sorry, I have to go on an assignment, I'll be back" --

    「抱歉,我還要去趕另一場攝影,我待會兒再回來。」

  • and then you never come back.

    然後就沒有再出現了。

  • So, I asked the translator why she thought she was dying.

    於是我問翻譯為何外婆認為自己快死了,

  • Can I get her to a hospital? Could I pay to get her a doctor?

    或許我能帶她上醫院,或找個醫生來看她呢?

  • And she refused any help at all.

    但她拒絕任何人的協助。

  • And so, when I got outside,

    我走到屋外,

  • I actually gave the translator some money and said,

    給了翻譯一些錢,說:

  • "Please go back and see if you can do something."

    「請你再回來看看是不是能幫他們什麼忙。」

  • And I gave the grandmother my business card.

    我把名片交給外婆,說:

  • And I said, "If you're serious, I will try to find a family for her."

    「如果你是認真的,我會想辦法幫賢淑找個收養家庭。」

  • And I immediately wrote a letter to my best friends

    我馬上寫了封信給我最好的朋友,

  • in Atlanta, Georgia, who had an 11-year-old son.

    他住在喬治亞州亞特蘭大,有個11歲的兒子,

  • And my best friend had mistakenly one day

    他曾經有次不經意地說出

  • said something about wishing he had another child.

    他希望能有另一個孩子。

  • So here my friends Gene and Gail had not heard from me in about a year,

    我和我的朋友金恩和蓋兒已經有一年沒有聯絡了,

  • and suddenly I was calling, saying "I'm in Korea,

    突然間我就告訴他們:「我在韓國,

  • and I've met this extraordinary girl."

    我見到了一個很棒的女孩!」

  • And I said, "The grandmother thinks she's sick,

    還說:「她外婆覺得自己生病了,

  • but I think maybe we would have to bring the grandmother over also."

    所以我認為或許我們應該把外婆一起接過去。」

  • And I said, "I'll pay for the ... " I mean, I had this whole sort of picture.

    我又說:「我會負擔費用...」我以為自己都計畫好了,

  • So anyway, I left.

    所以我就離開了。

  • And my friends actually said they were very interested in adopting her.

    後來我的朋友說他們對領養賢淑很有興趣,

  • And I said, "Look, I think I'll scare the grandmother to death,

    我說:「如果我只是寫封信去告訴外婆

  • if I actually write to her and tell her

    你想要領養賢淑這件事,

  • that you're willing to adopt her, I want to go back and talk to her."

    外婆恐怕會被嚇死,我還是回去親自告訴她好了。」

  • But I was off on assignment.

    但我有另外的工作要做,

  • I figured I'd come back in a couple of weeks and talk to the grandmother.

    我以為我可以在幾星期之內完成,那時再回去告訴她。

  • And on Christmas Day,

    接著就到了聖誕節,

  • I was in Bangkok with a group of photographers

    那時我在曼谷和一群攝影師一起工作,

  • and got a telegram -- back in those days, you got telegrams --

    我收到一封電報,那個時代只能以電報緊急聯絡,

  • from Time magazine saying someone in Korea had died,

    時代雜誌的人告訴我韓國的某人死了,

  • and left their child in a will to me.

    留下一個孩子和一封遺囑要給我。

  • Did I know anything about this?

    他們問我是否知道這件事?

  • Because I hadn't told them what I was doing,

    我並沒有告訴雜誌社之前那段時間我做了什麼,

  • because I was so upset with the story they'd run.

    因為我對他們之前所報導的專題很不滿意。

  • So, I went back to Korea, and I went back to Hyun-Sook's village,

    於是我趕回韓國,回到賢淑的村落,

  • and she was gone.

    但賢淑不見了,

  • And the house that I had spent time in was empty.

    那棟我曾住過的房子已經空了,

  • It was incredibly cold.

    在那冬天顯得特別冷。

  • No one in the village would tell me where Hyun-Sook was,

    村子裡沒人願意告訴我賢淑去了哪裡,

  • because the grandmother had always hidden her from Westerners.

    因為他們記得外婆總是不讓西方人接近賢淑,

  • And they had no idea about this request that she'd made of me.

    他們也不知道外婆曾留了一份遺囑給我。

  • So I finally found Myung Sung,

    最後我找到宋明,

  • her best friend that she used to play with after school every day.

    她是賢淑每天放學後最好的玩伴,

  • And Myung Sung, under some pressure from me and the translator,

    我和翻譯給了宋明一些壓力,

  • gave us an address on the outside of Seoul.

    她才給了我們在首爾郊外的一個住址。

  • And I went to that address and knocked on the door,

    我找到那個地方,敲了敲門,

  • and a man answered the door.

    有個男人來應門。

  • It was not a very nice area of Seoul,

    那個地方算是首爾較差的區域,

  • as there were mud streets outside of it.

    外圍的街道都還是泥巴地。

  • And I knocked on the door, and Hyun-Sook answered the door,

    接著賢淑出現了,

  • and her eyes were bloodshot, and she seemed to be in shock.

    她的眼眶很紅,看來是受到了驚嚇,

  • She didn't recognize me -- there was no recognition whatsoever.

    她沒有認出我,像是不認識我一樣。

  • And this man came to the door and kind of barked something in Korean.

    男人馬上來到門前,開始對我大聲咆哮著韓語,

  • And I said to the translator, "What did he say?"

    我問翻譯:「他說了什麼?」

  • And she said, "He wants to know who you are."

    她說:「他想知道你是誰。」

  • And I said, "Well, tell him that I am a photographer."

    我說:「告訴他我是個攝影師。」

  • I started explaining who I was, and he interrupted.

    我想要解釋我的身份,但是他制止我,

  • And she said, "He says he knows who you are, what do you want?"

    翻譯說:「他說他知道你是誰,但你要做什麼?」

  • I said, "Well, tell him that I was asked

    我說:「告訴他,我是應她外婆的要求,

  • by this little girl's grandmother to find a family for her."

    來幫賢淑找個收養家庭的。」

  • And he said, "I'm her uncle, she's fine, you can leave now."

    他說:「我是她舅舅,她很好,你可以走了。」

  • So I was -- you know, the door was being slammed in my face,

    他就把門在我面前猛地關上,

  • it's incredibly cold, and I'm trying to think,

    外面真的很冷,我試著回想:

  • "What would the hero do in a movie,

    「如果我是電影編劇,

  • if I was writing this as a movie script?"

    我會怎麼安排英雄出場呢?」

  • So I said, "Listen, it's really cold, I've come a very long way,

    我說:「嘿,外面很冷,我走了這麼遠的路才來到這裡,

  • do you mind if I just come in for a minute? I'm freezing."

    是不是可以讓我進來待個一分鐘?我真的快凍死了。」

  • So the guy kind of reluctantly let us in and we sat down on the floor.

    那男人不太甘願地讓我們進去,就讓我們坐在地板上,

  • And as we started talking, I saw him yell something,

    當我們開始談話時,我看到他在吼叫著什麼,

  • and Hyun-Sook came and brought us some food.

    接著賢淑就跑出來,為我們端上一些食物。

  • And I had this whole mental picture of, sort of like Cinderella.

    我突然覺得賢淑就好像灰姑娘,

  • I sort of had this picture of this incredibly wonderful,

    原本是一個很活潑、

  • bright, happy little child, who now appeared to be very withdrawn,

    積極、快樂的小女孩,現在變得很內向,

  • being enslaved by this family.

    在這個家庭裡像是奴隸一樣。

  • And I was really appalled, and I couldn't figure out what to do.

    我覺得很害怕,不知道該做些什麼。

  • And the more I tried talking to him, the less friendly he was getting.

    我愈想和他說些什麼,這個男人卻愈來愈不友善,

  • So I finally decided, I said "Look," --

    於是我下定決心,我說:「嘿!」

  • this is all through the translator, because, this is all,

    我的話全由翻譯轉達,

  • you know, I don't speak a word of Korean --

    因為我不會說半句韓語,

  • and I said, "Look, I'm really glad that Hyun-Sook has a family to live with.

    我說:「嘿!我很高興賢淑可以和家人一起住,

  • I was very worried about her.

    我之前真的很替她擔心,

  • I made a promise to her grandmother, your mother, that I would find a family,

    因為我答應過她的外婆,也就是你的母親,我會幫她找個收養家庭,

  • and now I'm so happy that you're going to take care of her."

    我很高興你願意照顧賢淑。」

  • I said, "But you know, I bought an airline ticket,

    我說:「但是我的回程機票

  • and I'm stuck here for a week."

    是訂在一個星期之後,

  • And I said, "I'm staying in a hotel downtown.

    所以我會在市中心的旅館裡住一個星期,

  • Would you like to come and have lunch tomorrow?

    你們明天願意過來和我一起吃個中飯嗎?

  • And you can practice your English." Because he told me --

    你也可以練習一下你的英文。」因為他告訴過我這件事,

  • I was trying to ask him questions about himself.

    那時我正想多瞭解他一點。

  • And so I went to the hotel, and I found two older Amerasians.

    於是我回到旅館,又找到另外二個年紀較大的美裔亞洲人,

  • A girl whose mother had been a prostitute,

    女孩的母親以前是個妓女,

  • and she was a prostitute,

    女孩自己也曾做過妓女,

  • and a boy who'd been in and out of jail.

    男孩則是不斷在監獄裡進出。

  • And I said to them, "Look, there's a little girl

    我告訴他們:「有個小女孩,

  • who has a tiny chance of getting out of here and going to America."

    她可能有一絲機會可以離開這裡去美國,

  • I said, "I don't know if it's the right decision or not,

    我不知道這個決定是否正確,

  • but I would like you to come to lunch tomorrow

    但我希望你們明天一起來吃中飯,

  • and tell the uncle what it's like to walk down the street,

    告訴那位舅舅外面的世界是怎麼樣的,

  • what people say to you, what you do for a living.

    現在外面的人都對你們說些什麼,還有你們怎麼謀生活,

  • And just -- I want him to understand what happens if she stays here.

    我希望他能瞭解賢淑待在這裡的下場會是如何,

  • And I could be wrong, I don't know, but I wish you would come tomorrow."

    我的決定可能是錯的,我不知道,但是我希望你們明天都能來。」

  • So, these two came to lunch, and

    這二個孩子第二天都來吃中飯,

  • we got thrown out of the restaurant.

    但我們被餐廳趕了出來,

  • They were yelling at him, they were -- it got to be really ugly.

    因為他們對著這位舅舅大吼,場面真的很難看。

  • And we went outside, and he was just furious.

    我們走到外頭,舅舅還是餘怒難平,

  • And I knew I had totally blown this whole thing.

    我知道我搞砸了,

  • Here I was again, trying to figure out what to do.

    只能再想辦法解決。

  • And he started yelling at me, and I said to the translator,

    但這位舅舅開始對我吼,我只好問翻譯:

  • "OK, tell him to calm down, what is he saying?"

    「請他冷靜一下吧,他在說什麼?」

  • And she said, "Well, he's saying