but, in fact, there's somebody in the audience

但在座各位可能還沒有聽過這個故事，

who's never heard this story -- in front of an audience -- before,

我也從來未曾對聽眾講過這個故事，

so I'm a little more nervous than I normally am telling this story.

所以這讓我比以往在講述這個故事時還要緊張。

I used to be a photographer for many years.

我擔任攝影師很多年了，

In 1978, I was working for Time magazine,

1978年時我受僱於時代雜誌，

and I was given a three-day assignment

他們要我在三天的時間內，

to photograph Amerasian children,

拍攝出一些美裔亞洲孩童的相片，

children who had been fathered by American GIs

這些孩子的父親都是美國大兵，

all over Southeast Asia, and then abandoned --

他們散佈在東南亞，全都被父親遺棄了，

40,000 children all over Asia.

全亞洲總計有4萬人之多。

I had never heard the word Amerasian before.

以前我從未聽過美裔亞洲人這個名詞，

I spent a few days photographing children in different countries,

我在幾個不同國家花了幾天時間為這些孩子照相，

and like a lot of photographers and a lot of journalists,

就像其他的攝影師或記者一樣，

I always hope that when my pictures were published,

我也希望當我的照片被登出來時，

they might actually have an effect on a situation,

或許能改變一點現狀，

instead of just documenting it.

而不僅僅只是記錄這件事而已。

So, I was so disturbed by what I saw,

我對我所看到的景像感到困惑，

and I was so unhappy with the article that ran afterwards,

對於後來搭配照片的文章也感到不快，

that I decided I would take six months off.

所以我決定停職六個月，

I was 28 years old.

那時我才28歲。

I decided I would find six children in different countries,

我決定，我要在不同的國家找到6個孩子，

and actually go spend some time with the kids,

多花一點時間與他們相處，

and try to tell their story a little bit better

報導這些孩子們的故事，

than I thought I had done for Time magazine.

而且要比之前為時代雜誌所做的報導更為深入。

In the course of doing the story,

為了要報導這個故事，

I was looking for children who hadn't been photographed before,

我得找一個以前從來沒有被人報導過的小孩，

and the Pearl Buck Foundation told me

而遺珠基金會告訴我，

that they worked with a lot of Americans who were

他們與一些曾捐錢資助

donating money to help some of these kids.

這些孩子的美國人一起合作，

And a man told me, who ran the Pearl Buck Foundation in Korea,

其中一個在韓國為遺珠基金會工作的人告訴我，

that there was a young girl, who was 11 years old, being raised by her grandmother.

有一個小女孩那時已經11歲了，由她的外婆扶養長大，

And the grandmother had never let any Westerners ever see her.

她外婆從不曾讓任何西方人接近她，

Every time any Westerners came to the village, she hid the girl.

每次只要有西方人去到這個村落，外婆就把女孩藏起來。

And of course, I was immediately intrigued.

這立刻就引起我的好奇心，

I saw photographs of her, and I thought I wanted to go.

我看到這女孩的照片，也決定要報導這女孩的故事。

And the guy just told me, "There's no way. This grandmother won't even -- you know,

那人只說：「沒辦法，她外婆甚至不讓...

there's no way she's ever going to let you meet this girl that's she's raising."

她外婆不會讓你見她親手帶大的外孫女的。」

I took a translator with me, and went to this village,

我帶了一位翻譯前去那個村落，

found the grandmother, sat down with her.

找到那位外婆，坐下來和她談，

And to my astonishment, she agreed to let me

但出乎我意料之外，

photograph her granddaughter.

外婆同意讓我為女孩拍照。

And I was paying for this myself, so I asked the translator

因為我這趟是由自己出資去的，所以我便問那翻譯，

if it would be OK if I stayed for the week.

問我是否能在那裡待上一個星期。

I had a sleeping bag.

我有自備睡袋，

The family had a small shed on the side of the house,

那家人在房子旁邊有個小棚，

so I said, "Could I sleep in my sleeping bag in the evenings?"

所以我問：「晚上是否可以讓我睡在睡袋裡？」

And I just told the little girl, whose name was Hyun-Sook Lee,

那女孩的名叫李賢淑，雖然她長得很像美國人，

that if I ever did anything to embarrass her --

但她卻不會說英語，

she didn't speak a word of English, although she looked very American --

所以我告訴她，如果我做了什麼她不喜歡的事，

she could just put up her hand and say, "Stop,"

可以把手舉起來說「Stop(停止)」，

and I would stop taking pictures.

這樣我就知道不要再幫她拍照了。

And then, my translator left.

我的翻譯接著就離開了，

So there I was, I couldn't speak a word of Korean,

留下我一個人，連一句韓語也不會講，

and this is the first night I met Hyun-Sook.

那時我才第一次見到賢淑。

Her mother was still alive.

她的母親還在世，

Her mother was not raising her, her grandmother was raising her.

但沒有扶養她，而是由外婆扶養。

And what struck me immediately was

我馬上就感受到

how in love the two of these people were.

這二人間親密的親情，

The grandmother was incredibly fond, deeply in love with this little girl.

外婆很溺愛這個小外孫女。

They slept on the floor at night.

晚上她們睡在地板上，

The way they heat their homes in Korea is to put bricks under the floors,

韓國人會在地板下鋪磚塊，

so the heat actually radiates from underneath the floor.

暖氣就會從地板下散放出來。

Hyun-Sook was 11 years old.

那時賢淑才11歲，

I had photographed, as I said, a lot of these kids.

我幫這些孩子們拍了很多照片，

Hyun-Sook was in fact the fifth child that I found to photograph.

賢淑是我所拍攝的主題的第5個孩子。

And almost universally, amongst all the kids,

這些孩子在全世界都一樣，

they were really psychologically damaged by

都成為別人捉弄、嘲笑的對象，不被認同，

having been made fun of, ridiculed, picked on and been rejected.

因此心靈大受傷害；

And Korea was probably the place I found

而我覺得這些孩子

to be the worst for these kids.

在韓國生活得更加艱苦。

And what struck me immediately in meeting Hyun-Sook

我立刻就發現，

was how confident she appeared to be,

賢淑是一個很有自信的孩子，

how happy she seemed to be in her own skin.

她也十分能接受自己。

And remember this picture,

請記住這張照片，

because I'm going to show you another picture later,

因為待會兒我會給各位看另一張照片，

but you can see how much she looks like her grandmother,

你可以看得出來她長得有多麼像她的外婆，

although she looks so Western.

儘管她有著一張西方人的臉孔。

I decided to follow her to school.

我決定跟著她到學校拍攝，

This is the first morning I stayed with her.

這是我跟她到學校的第一天早上，

This is on the way to school.

這是在上學途中，

This is the morning assembly outside her school.

她們先在學校外面集合。

And I noticed that she was clowning around.

我發現她很愛開玩笑。

When the teachers would ask questions,

每當老師問問題的時候，

she'd be the first person to raise her hand.

她總是第一個舉手回答，

Again, not at all shy or withdrawn,

不會害羞也不孤僻，

or anything like the other children that I'd photographed.

一點也不像我拍攝的其他小孩。

Again, the first one to go to the blackboard to answer questions.

她也總是第一個跑上黑板寫出答案的小孩。

Getting in trouble for whispering into her best friend's ears

她在課堂上和她最好的朋友咬耳朵，

in the middle of class.

所以被處罰了。

And one of the other things that I said to her through the translator --

和上次我教她說「停止」那件事一樣，

again, this thing about saying stop -- was to not pay attention to me.

我也趁翻譯還在時請翻譯告訴她不要太在意我的拍攝，

And so, she really just completely ignored me most of the time.

而她也就真的完全忽略我的存在。

I noticed that at recess, she was the girl

我發現在下課時間，

who picked the other girls to be on her team.

她負責挑選其他女孩到她的隊上，

It was very obvious, from the very beginning, that she was a leader.

從一開始，她就表現得很明顯，她是領隊。

This is on the way home.

這時回家時的照片。

And that's North Korea up along the hill.

山的那一邊就是北韓，

This is up along the DMZ.

這一邊是非軍事區，

They would actually cover the windows every night, so that light couldn't be seen,

晚上大家都會把窗子遮蔽起來，以防光線外漏，

because the South Korean government has said for years

因為南韓政府長年宣導

that the North Koreans may invade at any time.

北韓可能隨時會進攻，

So there's always this -- the closer you were to North Korea, the more terrifying it was.

所以愈靠近北韓，大家就愈恐懼。

Very often at school, I'd be taking pictures,

我經常在學校幫她拍照，

and she would whisper into her girlfriends' ears,

她會偷偷和另一個女孩咬耳朵，

and then look at me and say, "Stop."

然後看著我說：「停止。」

And I would stand at attention, and all the girls would crack up,

當我想知道發生什麼事時，其他女孩已經笑成一團，

and it was sort of a little joke.

原來她是在作弄我。

(Laughter)

(笑聲)

The end of the week came and my translator came back,

一個星期過去後，翻譯又回來了，

because I'd asked her to come back,

因為我之前就有交代她要回來，

so I could formally thank the grandmother and Hyun-Sook.

幫我好好謝謝賢淑和她外婆。

And in the course of the grandmother talking to the translator,

但在翻譯和外婆溝通時，

the grandmother started crying.

外婆哭了起來，

And I said to my translator, "What's going on, why is she crying?"

我問翻譯：「怎麼回事？外婆為什麼要哭？」

And she spoke to the grandmother for a moment,

翻譯又和外婆說了一陣子，

and then she started getting tears in her eyes.

這下連翻譯也哭了起來，

And I said, "OK, what did I do? What's going on?

我問：「這到底是怎麼回事？我到底做了什麼？

Why is everyone crying?"

為什麼每個人都要哭？」

And the translator said, "The grandmother says

翻譯說：「外婆說，

that she thinks she's dying,

她覺得自己快死了，

and she wants to know if you would take Hyun-Sook to America with you."

她想問你是不是可以把賢淑帶回美國？」

And I said, "I'm 28 years old, and I live in hotels,

我說：「我才28歲，只在旅館暫時棲身，

and I'm not married."

也還沒結婚。」

I mean I had fallen in love with this girl,

我真的很喜歡賢淑，

but I -- you know, it was, like, emotionally I was about 12 years old.

但這真的很不理性，就像個12歲小孩的表現一樣。

If you know of photographers, the joke is

如果你瞭解攝影這一行，你就會知道

it's the finest form of delayed adolescence ever invented.

為什麼大家都戲稱攝影師總是能把青春期無限延長：

"Sorry, I have to go on an assignment, I'll be back" --

「抱歉，我還要去趕另一場攝影，我待會兒再回來。」

and then you never come back.

然後就沒有再出現了。

So, I asked the translator why she thought she was dying.

於是我問翻譯為何外婆認為自己快死了，

Can I get her to a hospital? Could I pay to get her a doctor?

或許我能帶她上醫院，或找個醫生來看她呢？

And she refused any help at all.

但她拒絕任何人的協助。

And so, when I got outside,

我走到屋外，

I actually gave the translator some money and said,

給了翻譯一些錢，說：

"Please go back and see if you can do something."

「請你再回來看看是不是能幫他們什麼忙。」

And I gave the grandmother my business card.

我把名片交給外婆，說：

And I said, "If you're serious, I will try to find a family for her."

「如果你是認真的，我會想辦法幫賢淑找個收養家庭。」

And I immediately wrote a letter to my best friends

我馬上寫了封信給我最好的朋友，

in Atlanta, Georgia, who had an 11-year-old son.

他住在喬治亞州亞特蘭大，有個11歲的兒子，

And my best friend had mistakenly one day

他曾經有次不經意地說出

said something about wishing he had another child.

他希望能有另一個孩子。

So here my friends Gene and Gail had not heard from me in about a year,

我和我的朋友金恩和蓋兒已經有一年沒有聯絡了，

and suddenly I was calling, saying "I'm in Korea,

突然間我就告訴他們：「我在韓國，

and I've met this extraordinary girl."

我見到了一個很棒的女孩！」

And I said, "The grandmother thinks she's sick,

還說：「她外婆覺得自己生病了，

but I think maybe we would have to bring the grandmother over also."

所以我認為或許我們應該把外婆一起接過去。」

And I said, "I'll pay for the ... " I mean, I had this whole sort of picture.

我又說：「我會負擔費用...」我以為自己都計畫好了，

So anyway, I left.

所以我就離開了。

And my friends actually said they were very interested in adopting her.

後來我的朋友說他們對領養賢淑很有興趣，

And I said, "Look, I think I'll scare the grandmother to death,

我說：「如果我只是寫封信去告訴外婆

if I actually write to her and tell her

你想要領養賢淑這件事，

that you're willing to adopt her, I want to go back and talk to her."

外婆恐怕會被嚇死，我還是回去親自告訴她好了。」

But I was off on assignment.

但我有另外的工作要做，

I figured I'd come back in a couple of weeks and talk to the grandmother.

我以為我可以在幾星期之內完成，那時再回去告訴她。

And on Christmas Day,

接著就到了聖誕節，

I was in Bangkok with a group of photographers

那時我在曼谷和一群攝影師一起工作，

and got a telegram -- back in those days, you got telegrams --

我收到一封電報，那個時代只能以電報緊急聯絡，

from Time magazine saying someone in Korea had died,

時代雜誌的人告訴我韓國的某人死了，

and left their child in a will to me.

留下一個孩子和一封遺囑要給我。

Did I know anything about this?

他們問我是否知道這件事？

Because I hadn't told them what I was doing,

我並沒有告訴雜誌社之前那段時間我做了什麼，

because I was so upset with the story they'd run.

因為我對他們之前所報導的專題很不滿意。

So, I went back to Korea, and I went back to Hyun-Sook's village,

於是我趕回韓國，回到賢淑的村落，

and she was gone.

但賢淑不見了，

And the house that I had spent time in was empty.

那棟我曾住過的房子已經空了，

It was incredibly cold.

在那冬天顯得特別冷。

No one in the village would tell me where Hyun-Sook was,

村子裡沒人願意告訴我賢淑去了哪裡，

because the grandmother had always hidden her from Westerners.

因為他們記得外婆總是不讓西方人接近賢淑，

And they had no idea about this request that she'd made of me.

他們也不知道外婆曾留了一份遺囑給我。

So I finally found Myung Sung,

最後我找到宋明，

her best friend that she used to play with after school every day.

她是賢淑每天放學後最好的玩伴，

And Myung Sung, under some pressure from me and the translator,

我和翻譯給了宋明一些壓力，

gave us an address on the outside of Seoul.

她才給了我們在首爾郊外的一個住址。

And I went to that address and knocked on the door,

我找到那個地方，敲了敲門，

and a man answered the door.

有個男人來應門。

It was not a very nice area of Seoul,

那個地方算是首爾較差的區域，

as there were mud streets outside of it.

外圍的街道都還是泥巴地。

And I knocked on the door, and Hyun-Sook answered the door,

接著賢淑出現了，

and her eyes were bloodshot, and she seemed to be in shock.

她的眼眶很紅，看來是受到了驚嚇，

She didn't recognize me -- there was no recognition whatsoever.

她沒有認出我，像是不認識我一樣。

And this man came to the door and kind of barked something in Korean.

男人馬上來到門前，開始對我大聲咆哮著韓語，

And I said to the translator, "What did he say?"

我問翻譯：「他說了什麼？」

And she said, "He wants to know who you are."

她說：「他想知道你是誰。」

And I said, "Well, tell him that I am a photographer."

我說：「告訴他我是個攝影師。」

I started explaining who I was, and he interrupted.

我想要解釋我的身份，但是他制止我，

And she said, "He says he knows who you are, what do you want?"

翻譯說：「他說他知道你是誰，但你要做什麼？」

I said, "Well, tell him that I was asked

我說：「告訴他，我是應她外婆的要求，

by this little girl's grandmother to find a family for her."

來幫賢淑找個收養家庭的。」

And he said, "I'm her uncle, she's fine, you can leave now."

他說：「我是她舅舅，她很好，你可以走了。」

So I was -- you know, the door was being slammed in my face,

他就把門在我面前猛地關上，

it's incredibly cold, and I'm trying to think,

外面真的很冷，我試著回想：

"What would the hero do in a movie,

「如果我是電影編劇，

if I was writing this as a movie script?"

我會怎麼安排英雄出場呢？」

So I said, "Listen, it's really cold, I've come a very long way,

我說：「嘿，外面很冷，我走了這麼遠的路才來到這裡，

do you mind if I just come in for a minute? I'm freezing."

是不是可以讓我進來待個一分鐘？我真的快凍死了。」

So the guy kind of reluctantly let us in and we sat down on the floor.

那男人不太甘願地讓我們進去，就讓我們坐在地板上，

And as we started talking, I saw him yell something,

當我們開始談話時，我看到他在吼叫著什麼，

and Hyun-Sook came and brought us some food.

接著賢淑就跑出來，為我們端上一些食物。

And I had this whole mental picture of, sort of like Cinderella.

我突然覺得賢淑就好像灰姑娘，

I sort of had this picture of this incredibly wonderful,

原本是一個很活潑、

bright, happy little child, who now appeared to be very withdrawn,

積極、快樂的小女孩，現在變得很內向，

being enslaved by this family.

在這個家庭裡像是奴隸一樣。

And I was really appalled, and I couldn't figure out what to do.

我覺得很害怕，不知道該做些什麼。

And the more I tried talking to him, the less friendly he was getting.

我愈想和他說些什麼，這個男人卻愈來愈不友善，

So I finally decided, I said "Look," --

於是我下定決心，我說：「嘿！」

this is all through the translator, because, this is all,

我的話全由翻譯轉達，

you know, I don't speak a word of Korean --

因為我不會說半句韓語，

and I said, "Look, I'm really glad that Hyun-Sook has a family to live with.

我說：「嘿！我很高興賢淑可以和家人一起住，

I was very worried about her.

我之前真的很替她擔心，

I made a promise to her grandmother, your mother, that I would find a family,

因為我答應過她的外婆，也就是你的母親，我會幫她找個收養家庭，

and now I'm so happy that you're going to take care of her."

我很高興你願意照顧賢淑。」

I said, "But you know, I bought an airline ticket,

我說：「但是我的回程機票

and I'm stuck here for a week."

是訂在一個星期之後，

And I said, "I'm staying in a hotel downtown.

所以我會在市中心的旅館裡住一個星期，

Would you like to come and have lunch tomorrow?

你們明天願意過來和我一起吃個中飯嗎？

And you can practice your English." Because he told me --

你也可以練習一下你的英文。」因為他告訴過我這件事，

I was trying to ask him questions about himself.

那時我正想多瞭解他一點。