You probably already know this, but the movie that I filmed a year ago is finally coming out.

你們應該知道...我去年拍的電影終於上映(出來)啦

I'm... GAAAYYY!

我是...同性戀！

And also it's coming out as in like....you can watch it online.

而上映的意思就是...可以線上看

But anyway, and just for those that don't already know

反正，先跟不知道的人說一下，就是～

If you do choose to watch it, it's not gonna be like one of my videos.

如果你真的要看，這部電影不會像我平時拍的影片那樣。

1. This movie's not a comedy

1.這電影不是喜劇/搞笑片

It's a thriller/horror and I only acted in it.

它是一部驚悚/恐怖片，而我只是在內的一位演員。

I didn't write it or direct it or anything because if I did I would probably ruin it.

劇不是我編的，片不是我導的， 因為我應該會把一切給蹧蹋掉

And actually that thought alone kinda got me thinking:

其實，那個想法就給我一個點子

A lot of you guys are always telling me that I should actually direct real movies and mainstream movies

有超多人一直叫我拍一部真正的電影

I'm telling you right now that is a terrible idea, I would ruin your favourite movie.

我現在就告訴你：這是個很爛的點子，我會把你心愛的電影給用毀掉

And not just because I would turn everything into a joke, but mainstream movies are nothing like making these videos.

並不只因為我會把一切都拍成一個笑話，是因為主流電影跟我拍的影片沾不上邊。

They have crazy expensive budgets with huge sets, stunts, really good acting.

他們成本超高，超強特技，演員也有很好的演技

It's just an all around huge gigantic professional production crew.

他們就是擁有超強大的製作團隊

What do I have, I have this. *snaps*

我有什麼勒？我有...

See? We're even better

00:00:54,100 --> 00:00:55,100

Which is why I picked some of the most expensive movies ever made and recreated them to show you guys what they would look on low budget.

00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:57,140

And more importantly what they would look like if I directed them.

00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,000

Movies.

00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:04,580 ［嘆氣］

On a Budget.

看到了吧？

AUTOBOTS TRANSFORM.

我們其實比較好

*Transformation sounds*

這就是為啥我把歷史中成本最高的電影 全都拍成低成本電影給你們看

*Transformation sounds*

更重要的是，假如是我導的。

Beep, bap, beep, beep, bop,

［電影］

Beep, Bap, Beep, Beep,

［低預算限制版］

Ah, a parking lot.

［變形金剛系列］博派～變形！

*badass music kicks in*

00:01:44,100 --> 00:01:46,200

*engine revs up*

00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:51,260

*tire screeches*

00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:54,700 嗶吧嗶嗶噗

Yes!

嗶吧嗶嗶嗶

Damn it!

［玩命關頭系列］

I WIIIIIN!

00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:09,880 啊！找到停車位了！

Can't believe I lost that parking lot.

［戰鬥開始］

MY SPOT BABY!! YOU GOTTA FIND ANOTHER ONE

00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:21,880

Oh look, another parking.

00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:52,820 噢耶！

They're looking iki meow

靠夭喔

Kawai lani

我贏勒～～～～～～～～～～～

Umamao ker a o kailo ker pung

我竟然輸了！？

Hikimaekerlaoulergar

我的！我的停車位！你再去找別的唄！

Ker lao mer

喔喔，那邊還有停車位

Ker ting ke um ke pukerver ke nana

目標鎖定

Simon Nala

導彈發射

Simba Nala wtf Ryan XD

再次發射

Timon Pumba

啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊

Skysarcsm

00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:24,300 歐比王根本沒有跟你提過你的父親

Skysa der der long cha chita

他說的足夠了！

00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:24,860 Hapunaru

他告訴你把他給殺了！

Shimon Kwa

不！

Outa tita toma

我就是你的父親！

Man ti tae o!

不，這不是真的！

Toma!

不可能！！！

joy polla malu

是嗎？

tama

這位是22歲的路克・天行者

Sibom pa chita ta gu ta

達斯維達，你就是他爸！

Miki Hoe

蝦米！？

oy takanake ou kao!!!

不不不。你是在說什麼狗屁＊嗶＊（消音）

*suprised face*

吪...就像我剛說的，這就是低成本製作出的電影

Targets engaged.

我們會將它們變得更好

Fire the missile.

好啦，都是開玩笑的 如果哪天我認真的製作一部認真的電影

Fire missile 2.

不會像這些滑稽的短片一樣... 會更糟的

*r.i.p* lol

總之

*Screams of agony*

跟以前一樣，我總是在構思主題時的偏掉了

*dramatic music plays*

我原本應該跟你們說這部電影的； 但你們也知道的，我又沒有這麼做了

laser comes out of nowhere

電影製作人原本希望我做個影片宣傳， 結果我做了這個短片

Hi Darth

你知道我幹嘛不做宣傳嗎？

Hi Ryan

因為我才不是什麼直銷， 我才不會用我的頻道去宣傳任何東西，好嗎？

How's it going?

我才不會跟你們說：電影就在今天9/16週五上映， 所以你們才會上網購買

Good

我絕對不會告訴你這些的 （嗯！我絕對不會相信的！）

How's your mother?

我不是什麼愛搞促銷的貨， 整天告訴你們去看你們根本不想看的東西

IDK

我永遠不會那麼做的！ 我挺身告訴那些貪懶的製作人說：這是我的頻道ＯＫ？

How's your father?!

這是我的頻道！我有道德觀的！ 我不會就這樣告訴大家：你們可以去Tellmehowide.com購買影片喔！

He's dead

只要美金9.99在TELLMEHOWIDIE.COM喔 只要美金9.99在TELLMEHOWIDIE.COM喔

FOR REAL?

我不會！

yeah.....

我告訴他們，我是比那些更好的人， 我告訴他們我說的那些話...

Most epic fight in scene in history

我到底在說什麼...

(Ryan screaming)

好了大家，認真的現在， 電影今天上映了，我就只是要說這個而已

Obi-Wan never told you about your father.

如果你有一小時閑空，還有美金10元想要找零的話， 去看看電影吧，我認真覺得很好看的

He told me enough!

再次提醒，這是部低成本製作的電影； 不過我認為成品很好看的

He told me you killed him!

如果你想瞭解更多，只要按影片下面完整資訊那就好

No!

如果你們不想看，完全沒關係， 我們就下週見啦，在這裡

I am your father!

全新一集的達斯魔理！！！！

NO, that's not true!

下一集，達斯魔理：達斯維達還有另一個兒子！

That's impossible!

我是... 同性戀！！！！（電影出來）

Oh is it?!

When it comes to 22 year old Luke Skywalker.

Darth Vader, you are the father!

WHHAT!?

NO NO NO. THAT'S F*CKING BULLSH*T DUDE

And like I said that's what would happen if you gave us these expensive movies to make.

We'd make them better.

Obviously this wasn't serious at all. One day when I do make an actual legit movie a legit feature film

it's not gonna be like this ridiculous skits, it's gonna be a lot worse.

But anyway!

When I was writing this video I've got completely off topic as usual.

This video was supposed to be telling you guys about the movie that I did but once again I didn't do that.

And actually the producers of the movie wanted me to do a video promoting... you know... this movie but I did this instead.

And you know why I'm not doing all this promo?

Cause I'm not some kinda sellout, okay? That's just gonna use my YouTube channel to promote things, okay?

You know I'm not gonna tell you guys that oooh-- the movie comes out today, September the 16th, the Friday so you can get it online anywhere.

You know- you know I'm not gonna say that!

I'm not some kinda promo whore that's gonna subliminally tell you to watch something you guys don't wanna watch.

I would never do that. I stood up to those greedy producers and I said ''Look,this is my channel, okay?''

This is my channel and I have morals. I'm not just gonna go and tell people that they can order this movie right now at Tellmehowidie.com

For the simple prize of 9.99$ at tellmehowidie.com for the simple prize of 9.99$.

NO!!

Okay I am better than that I told them I said them what I did I said.

What the..

Guys in all seriousness, the movie is out that's all I needed to say.

If you have an hour and a half and 10 dollars to spare please go check it out I actually think It's very good for something.

Again keep in mind it was a low budget and I still think it turned out really good.

If you wanna know more just click the link in the description.

If not and you guys don't wanna watch it that is perfectly fine I would just see you next week, here.

ON A BRAND NEW EPISODE OF DARTH MAULRYY!!!

On the next episode of Darth Maulry, Vader has another son.

I'm GAAAYY!