Have a seat. Thanks for being here.

請坐，謝謝你們來到這裡

That is the perfect amount of applause,

給我這麼足夠的掌聲，

and any more would be superfluous.

再多就太多了

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

That's a word that means "more than enough."

那個字的意思是「太多」

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

Yeah, Portia gave me a "Word of the Day" calendar, so--

那是 Portia 給我的「每日一字」，所以...

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

I like to learn new things.

我喜歡學習新鮮的事物

I'm not just a pretty face.

我可不只是有張漂亮的臉

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

For instance, do you know what a lifehack is?

舉例來說，你知道什麼是生活妙方嗎？

Does everybody know what a lifehack is?

大家知道什麼是生活妙方嗎？

[audience reacts] Everybody?

[觀眾做出反應] 大家都知道嗎？

Does anybody not know? Good, okay, good, here it is.

誰不知道？很好，所謂生活妙方

It's a tip or a trick that can make your life easier,

就是讓生活能夠更方便的要訣和技巧，

and if there's one thing that I'm on this Earth to do,

如果說我的存在是有某種意義的話，

it's to make your life easier.

那就是讓你的生活變得更輕鬆

So I want to share some lifehacks with you

因此我要和你分享一些生活妙方

in case you have not heard of these,

假如你還沒聽說過這些的話，

because they're-- they're helpful.

因為它們非常的實用

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

Here's the first one. Okay, first of all,

第一個是，首先

you should always, always keep grapes in your freezer.

你的冷凍庫裡應該要一直都有葡萄

Trust me on this. I'll tell you why,

相信我，讓我告訴你為什麼，

if you don't know this already.

如果你還不知道的話

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

So if you're having a party, or if it's just Tuesday,

比方當你舉辦派對，或只是一般的日子，

you want to have a glass of wine,

你想要來一杯酒，

but that fancy bottle that you bought from 7-Eleven is not cold. [audience laughter]

那瓶你從 7-11 買來看似花俏的酒不是冰的 [觀眾笑聲]

You can use grapes instead of ice cubes,

你可以用冰凍的葡萄代替冰塊，

and that way it doesn't water down--

如此一來便不會稀釋

You just put the grapes in, and it doesn't water down the wine.

你就把葡萄放進去，酒的濃度不會變淡

[cheers and applause]

[歡呼及掌聲]

I learned this from Martha Stewart,

我是從瑪莎史都華那裡學來的，

and if Martha Stewart does it, it can't be wrong, right?

如果連瑪莎都這樣做，那肯定不會出錯，對吧？

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

But that's great--I think it's great for anything,

這個辦法真的很棒，它可以加在任何飲料裡，

'cause when you put ice cubes in,

因為當你放進去的是冰塊時，

it waters it down, so you put that in your vodka, your tequila, your-- [audience laughter]

就會稀釋，所以你可以將凍葡萄加進伏特加、龍舌蘭、你的... [觀眾笑聲]

Keep some grapes in your freezer.

把葡萄放進冷凍庫就對了

Okay, this next one, if you're on a plane, or anywhere, really,

下一個是，如果你在搭飛機，或是任何地方都行，

and you want to watch something on your phone.

你想在手機上看些什麼

You know, people send you videos, or even if you want to watch a movie or something on a plane,

像是朋友寄來的視頻，甚至是電影或其他的東西，

but you don't want to hold your arm up for that long,

但是你不想長時間將手舉高，

because you haven't worked out.

畢竟你沒有在健身

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

You take your glasses,

你可以拿眼鏡，

and you put your glasses down like that,

將眼鏡像這樣放下，

and then you put your phone down like that,

之後把手機這樣放，

and it's-- [cheers and applause]

然後... [歡呼及掌聲]

[cheers and applause]

[歡呼及掌聲]

I know! [cheers and applause]

對吧！[歡呼及掌聲]

[cheers and applause]

[歡呼及掌聲]

Now listen, if you need glasses to see it, I can't help you,

聽著，如果你需要眼鏡才看得到的話，那我就幫不上忙了，

because-- [audience laughter]

因為... [觀眾笑聲]

Or put your sunglasses down and use your glasses.

或者你可以用太陽眼鏡放手機然後用眼鏡來看

Okay, this next one is--

下一個妙方是...

How many of you lose your corkscrew all the time?

在你們之中誰時常弄丟拔塞器？

Or your corkscrew breaks because the corkscrew thing wears out, 'cause you drink constantly?

還是拔塞器因為你太常喝酒而弄壞的？

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

Here's what you do: you take...

你可以這樣做：你拿...

A screw and a screwdriver,

一根螺絲和一支螺絲起子，

and you screw it-- so you have to have this,

然後將它轉進去... 所以你必須要有這個，

so maybe... [audience laughter]

或許-- [觀眾笑聲]

You do have to have a screw and a screwdriver, but--

你要有一根螺絲和一支螺絲起子，但...

You screw it in, and then you take a fork,

你將螺絲扭進去，接著拿一隻叉子，

and all you do...

像這樣...

[audience murmuring]

[觀眾竊竊私語]

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

Come here, tWitch.

tWitch 你可以來一下嗎

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

I've already bent the fork.

我已經把叉子弄彎了

Right.

對

All right, do you think it's the other way?

你認為叉子應該往另一面放嗎？

I think it's the other way.

我覺得應該是另一邊

All right.

好

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

It's fine, it's just the--

沒問題，只是...

Just give me a second.

給我點時間

You're gonna--

你會...

No, I got it, I got it.

沒事，我可以，我可以的

- No. - I got it, see?

- 不要啊 - 我就說我可以，你看

- No, you're putting it-- - Life is hacked.

- 你把叉子放到-- - 生活妙招成功了

- You're putting it into your skin.

- 叉子壓到你的皮膚了

Oh, wow. [cheers and applause]

哇！ [歡呼及掌聲]

[cheers and applause]

[歡呼及掌聲]

- Life is hacked. - All right.

- 生活妙招的確成功了 - 好啦

Thank you. Thank you.

謝謝你，謝謝

[cheers and applause]

[歡呼及喝采]

All right, so, you have to live with tWitch, but still.

所以你必須和 tWitch 一起生活，但沒關係

[audience laughter]

[觀眾笑聲]

Nothing wrong with that. Okay.

這樣也不錯

And here's-- this is the last hack.

最後一個生活妙方

This is--if you have toilet paper rolls,

如果你有衛生紙卷，

which are handy for all kinds of things,

它可以被利用在各種東西上，

People use them to keep-- like, you organize your cords,

人們用它來整理...像是整理各種的線，

and put your cords in there.

將線放在紙卷裡

You can keep your rolls of wrapping paper from un--

你可以將包裝紙這樣放...

See? I'm helping. [audience laughter]

看到沒？我在幫忙呢 [觀眾笑聲]

So here's my favorite use for that.

這是我最喜歡的用法

So if you want to listen to music,

如果你想聽音樂，

but you don't have any speakers, what you do is,

可是沒有喇叭的時候，你只需要這樣做，

[plays music on phone]

[從手機放音樂]

[music is amplified] [audience reacts]

[音樂變大聲] [觀眾反應]

[cheers and applause]

[歡呼及掌聲]

And then you dance!

然後你就可以跳舞了！