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  • Overcoming bad inner voices

    克服心中的負面聲音

  • We don't often think about it, and may never discuss it with others at all, but pretty much everyone has voices in their heads.

    我們不常思考這件事,也可能完全不曾和他人討論過,但滿確定的是每個人心中都有聲音

  • A murmuring stream of thoughts that run along inside our minds most of the time.

    大多時候一連串想法低吟著流經我們腦海

  • Sometimes, the inner voice is encouraging, calling for you to run those final few yards, "You're nearly there, keep going! Keep going!"

    有時候,內心聲音很激勵人心,鼓勵你跑完最後幾碼:「就快到了,再加把勁!再加把勁!」

  • Or urging you to calm down because you know it will all be okay in the end.

    或是要求你冷靜下來因為你知道最後一切都會沒事的

  • But sometimes...

    然而有時...

  • ...the inner voice is simply not very nice at all.

    ...內心聲音一點也不好

  • It is defeatist and punitive, panic-ridden and humiliating.

    它是失敗主義者,帶有懲罰性、造成恐慌、讓你羞恥的

  • It doesn't represent anything like our best insights or most mature capacities.

    它並不是我們最好的遠見或最成熟的才能

  • It's not the voice of our better nature.

    它不是我們良善天性的聲音

  • We find ourselves saying, "You disgust me," "Things always go to shit with you," or "You useless little idiot."

    我們發現自己說出:「你讓我噁心」、「事情到你手上都會出事」、或「你這沒路用的小白癡」

  • Where do inner voices come from?

    內心聲音從哪來的呢?

  • An inner voice always used to be an outer voice.

    內心聲音都是從外在聲音來的

  • We absorb the tone of others: a harassed or angry parent, the menacing threats of an elder sibling keen to put us down, the words of a schoolyard bully, or a teacher who seemed impossible to please.

    我們吸取別人的語調:煩躁或生氣的家長、兄姊迫切想要修理我們來勢洶洶的威脅、校園霸凌者的話、或是難以取悅的老師

  • We internalized the unhelpful voices, because at certain key moments in the past they sounded compelling.

    我們將這些毫無幫助的聲音內化,因為在過去某些特定的重大時刻它們聽起來很有強制性

  • The authority figures repeated their messages over and over, until they got lodged in our own way of thinking.

    權威者一再一再重複他們的訊息,直到它們深植入我們的思考模式

  • Part of achieving happiness and maturity involves altering our inner voices

    得到快樂或變得成熟偶爾會改變我們的內心聲音

  • which means encountering equally convincing and confident, but also helpful and constructive varieties of voices over long periods

    也就是長期以來遇到各種同等具說服力、可信的,同時又有助益、有建設性的聲音

  • and taking care to internalize them.

    並花心思將它們內化

  • They might be the voices of a friend, a therapist or an author.

    它們可能是一位朋友、治療師、或是作家的聲音

  • We need to hear them often enough and around tricky enough issues that they come to feel normal and natural responses, so that eventually,

    我們必須夠常在夠棘手的事件聽見它們,它們才會成為正常、自然的反應,這樣一來最終

  • They come to feel like things we are saying to ourselves.

    它們會變得好像我們對自己說的話

  • They become our own thoughts.

    變成我們自己的想法

  • The best sort of inner voice speaks to us in a gentle, kind and unhurried way.

    最好的內心聲音以一種有禮、親切、從容的方式說話

  • It should feel as if a sympathetic arm were being put around our shoulder

    它感覺應該要像慈愛的手臂環繞我們的肩膀

  • by someone who had lived long and seen a great many sad things, but wasn't embittered or panicked by them.

    由某位已經活了很長一段時間並見識過無數傷心事,卻沒有因它們而受苦、驚慌的人

  • In certain states of humiliation around work, in many of us, there is a mocking and contemptuous voice inside one's head.

    在工作中某些特定的恥辱階段,我們之中很多人的腦袋裡會有一個嘲弄、輕蔑的聲音

  • It suggests that love, respect, and kindness only ever come via worldly success and competence.

    它說愛、尊重、友善只會經由世俗的成就與能力而來

  • Our failure: not being able to make a public speech, taking time to learn to drive a car, not being especially brilliant at sales, rightly debars us from love and appreciation.

    我們的失敗:不敢在公共場合演講、花很多時間學開車、在銷售方面並不特別靈光,正當地將我們和愛與感激分隔

  • We need to incorporate a voice that separates out achievement from love,

    我們需要內建一種聲音,將成就與否和愛分離

  • that reminds us that we may be worthy of affection, even if we fail, and that being a winner is only one part, and not necessarily the most important part, of one's identity.

    提醒我們就算失敗了,我們仍值得被愛,還有成為贏家只是我們身分的一部份,而不必然是最重要的部份

  • This is, traditionally, the voice of the mother,

    這個通常是媽媽的聲音

  • but it might also be the voice of a lover, a poet we like, or a nine year old child chatting to his or her mom or dad about stress at the office.

    但聲音也有可能來自戀人、喜歡的詩人、或是9歲小孩和爸媽聊到辦公室壓力

  • It is the voice of a person who loves you for being you, outside of achievement.

    這是一個愛原本的你,而非你的成就的人的聲音

  • Many of us grew up around nervous people: people who lost their tempers the moment the parking ticket couldn't be found,

    我們很多人成長在緊張的人周圍:找不到停車證就發火的人、

  • and who were knocked off course by relatively minor administrative hurdles, like the electricity bill.

    還有被小小的行政障礙亂了陣腳的人,像是電費帳單

  • These people had no faith in themselves, and therefore, without necessarily wanting to do us harm, couldn't have much faith in our abilities either.

    這些人並不相信自己,因此,不必然想要傷害我們,對我們的能力也不抱有太大信心

  • Every time we faced an exam, they got more alarmed than we did.

    每到考試時,他們比我們更驚慌失措

  • They always asked multiple times if we had enough to wear when we went outside, they worried about our friends and our teachers.

    當我們出門,他們總會問很多次我們穿得夠不夠,他們擔心我們的朋友、老師

  • They were sure the holiday was going to turn into a disaster.

    他們確信假期將會成為災難

  • Now, these voices have become our own,

    現在,這些聲音變成我們自己的

  • and cloud our capacity to take an accurate measurement of what we are capable of.

    並且遮蔽了我們精確測量自己能做甚麼的才能

  • We have internalized voices of irrational fear and fragility.

    我們已將非理性的恐懼和脆弱內化

  • At such moments, we need an alternative voice that can pause our runaway fears

    在這種時刻,我們需要另一種聲音來暫停我們四處逃竄的恐懼

  • and remind us of the strength we have latent within us, which the currents of panic have hidden from us.

    並提醒我們擁有潛藏的力量,被驚慌所隱藏的力量

  • Our heads are large, cavernous spaces.

    我們的頭腦是巨大、多穴的空間

  • They contain the voices of all the people we have ever known.

    包含了我們曾經認識的所有人的聲音

  • We should learn to mute the unhelpful ones, and focus on the voices we really need to guide us through the thickets of life.

    我們該學習將沒有幫助的聲音關小聲,專注在我們真正需要能夠帶領我們穿過生命密林的聲音

  • We humbly offer this voice, as one of the more helpful ones we might take on board.

    我們僅將這個聲音,作為我們航向生命所攜帶的有用的聲音

  • [Outro video, left side] From a young age, we're taught it's a terrible thing.

    【片尾,左側】從小,我們就被教育這是件很糟糕的事

  • So when we feel it, as we all do, we are inclined not to examine it, we just feel---

    所以當我們感受到了,我們每個人都是,我們傾向於不去檢視它,只是感受它...

  • [Outro video, right side, man] ---Regional Italian. Whatever that means. *Chuckle*

    【片尾,右側,男】...義大利方言。管它什麼意思。呵呵

  • [Woman] It got some amazing reviews online.

    【女】線上有一些很讚的回顧

Overcoming bad inner voices

克服心中的負面聲音

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克服心中的負面的聲音 (Overcoming Bad Inner Voices)

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    Kristi Yang 發佈於 2017 年 04 月 19 日
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