字幕列表 影片播放 列印所有字幕 列印翻譯字幕 列印英文字幕 Hey guys! 嘿!各位! So I know every year around the same time, 我知道每年大約在同一時間 when it gets closer and closer to Valentine's Day, 越來越接近情人節的時候 I always make the same type of video where I'm kinda like, 我總是在做同樣或接近這類型的影片 Not really making fun of romance, 不是真的在開浪漫玩笑 but kinda like clowning on the fact that how exaggerated romance is 但有點像那種小丑去誇大浪漫這件事 In like entertainment and movies and all that kinda stuff. 像是一些娛樂還有電影會做的這類東西 I'm not like really making fun of romance, 我不是真的在開浪漫玩笑 I'm just kinda dissing on the whole cliches 我只是有點鄙視這些陳腔濫調 and romantic scenes that happen in movies. 還有電影裡發生的那些浪漫場景 It's kinda become a tradition, in a way. 因為這種現象在某種程度上有點變成傳統了 Well this year, I had a little change of heart. 今年,我心態上有一點改變了 * Shows the heart of change, DUN DUN DUN! * (註:Change有「改變」和「零錢」的說法) Get it? 'Cause it's like made of spare change- oh! 懂嗎?因為這就用多餘的零錢做的... And also I'm gonna keep the tradition going so let's go! 然後我也想要保持這個傳統,所以開始吧! Romantic Clichés 浪漫的陳腔濫調 In real life... 在真實的世界中... Breakfast in bed 床上早餐 [Romantic music] Babe, babe wake up. 寶貝,寶貝起床了 What is all of this? 這些是什麼? It's breakfast in bed. 這是床上早餐 Aw, they're beautiful.. 哇~這花好美呀~ It's all your favorites, right? 這些都是你喜歡的,對吧? Thank you 謝謝 Mhmm, it's so good 恩~~好好吃! Anything else you need? 你還需要什麼嗎? Maybe just a little salt 大概需要一點鹽吧 Babe wake up. 寶貝,起床了 Babe wake up..! 寶貝,起床了...! Babe! 寶貝! Wake up. 起床了! What are you doing? 你要幹麻? Oh good, you're awake 哦好,你醒了 Um... 恩... What is this? 這是什麼? Breakfast in bed 床上早餐 Here you go 拿去吧 Can't we just eat in the-? 我們不能去廚房吃嗎...? Sorry - Wow 抱歉 Make room for thi- 哇...! Got you some flowers to- 給你一些花... Oh my gosh! 噢老天! Oh gosh---Oh! 噢老天! Oh! 噢! I think um... Sorry 恩... 抱歉... -Yeah okay, -Hold on -嗯嗯... -等一下 Thanks 謝謝... That's--That's everything 這... 這就是全部了 So... 所以...! Voila 來囉! Dig in, 開動吧 Its all my favorites, right? 這些都是我喜歡的,對吧? Yeah... 恩.... Wow... 哇.... So? What do you think? 所以,你覺得怎麼樣? I mean... I guess it could use a little sal-- 我的意思是...我想它可以用點鹽... Oh my gosh! You're getting salt everywhere! 天啊! 你撒的鹽到處都是! Oh no, that's not salt. Remember? We ran out 噢不,那不是鹽,記得嗎? 我們用完了 What? 蛤? What are you doing? 你在幹麻? No! Is that?!? 不!該不會...! It's Dandruff BAE <3 是頭皮屑,寶貝 The "Sexy Work Visit" 性感的工作拜訪 Perfect, 完美! Uhh, hold on one second. 恩... 等我一下! I'm on the phone right now! 我正在講電話 Uh, sorry about that. 恩,抱歉! So yeah,I-I will..... 恩,對,我... Phew, you got to be kidding me. 哎,你在開玩笑吧... [Sexy music ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)] You know what, I'm gonna have to- I'm gonna have to call you back. 呃... 我等等打電話給你 I can come back later.. 我可以晚一點再過來 No!N-n-no I'm..totally free right now. 不...不不不,我現在非常有空 That's what I though 我也這麼想 ummm... 恩... I... 我... (Derp face lol) I'm... I'm on the phone right now 我... 我正在講電話 so you could please come back 所以你過來吧 Ohhh.. you've got to be kidding me. 噢... 你在開玩笑吧... oh, you know I'm gonna have to call you back 噢,我等等打電話給你 I'm so sorry just my stupid wife 抱歉,是我愚蠢的老婆來了 Hi Honey 嗨,甜心 [sigh] I can come back later... 我可以晚一點再過來 PLEASE come back later 拜託!晚一點再過來! I have so much work to do! 我還有好多工作要做! Still working? 還在工作? YES! 對! I have so much to do! 我還有好多工作要做! Ok, you still working? 嗯嗯~你還在工作? What the *bleep* 搞X啊? What? 什麼? You just broke my computer! 你剛摔壞了我的電腦! All my clients on there! 我的客戶資料都在裡面! I'm gonna get fired now 我要被解雇了! Babe... I'm sure we would be just fine... 寶貝...我相信我們會很好的... [Homeless&Hungry] PLEASE HELP 飢餓又無家可歸 請幫幫忙 [The Surprise] 驚喜 OK, be careful. Just sit right here 恩,小心,就坐在這裡 Right here? 這裡嗎? Uh huh. 嗯嗯! Sit.... 坐! Hey... 嘿... No peeking.... 不要偷看 I'm not! I can't see anything 我沒有,我什麼都看不到 What am I getting? 我會得到什麼? What did I do to deserve this gift? 我做了什麼要給我禮物? It's not even my birthday! 我生日也還沒到啊? You'll see... 你會知道的... k.. 好吧... *Camera beep* Ok 好 Alright.. 是的 Open your eyes.. 張開你的眼睛 -You can take it off now. -Take it off? - 你現在可以脫掉眼罩了 - 可以脫了? Yes! *Nervous laugh* 是的! *Laughs all around* no.. So I'm going to be a dad? 噢!所以我要當爸了? I'm going to be a dad! 我要當爸了! Open your eyes.. 張開你的眼睛 -You can take it off now. -Take it off? - 你現在可以脫掉了 - 可以脫了? What is this? 這是什麼? Are you-Are you pregnant? 妳...妳懷孕了? Yes! 是的 Oh my god (it's baby Ryden) 噢老天啊! I know 我知道 OH MY GOD 噢老天 What are we gonna do? 我們該怎麼辦? What? 什麼? We can't even afford rent 我們甚至還無法負擔房租 How did you even afford this? 你怎麼負擔得起這個? How are we supposed to afford diapers and toys and- 我們要如何負擔得起尿布、玩具和... Babe! 寶貝! Calm down! 冷靜! Seriously 說真的 Everything is gonna be just fin- (Yet again) The "Don't Get On That Plane Because I have 'un Last Corny 「不要上那架飛機,因為我要讓你知道,我們可以過著幸福的生活」的時刻 Next 下一個 Stop 停! Gina wait! Gina!等等! Wait 等等! Gina wait Gina,等等! Don't get on that plane 不要上那架飛機! Please 拜託... Look, I-I-I know I told you to take that job in Paris 我..我..我知道是我告訴妳要把握這份在巴黎的工作 Where you gonna be making a ton of money 在那裡妳可以賺很多很多的錢 Even though you have to work for that 他從妳從事這項工作的那一刻起 evil boss that makes you feel horrible 即使你必須為那個邪惡的老闆工作,讓你感到可怕 And I know that straight male co-worker 而且我知道那個看起來很帥的直男同事會在那裡 that's incredibly good looking is gonna be there And he's been trying to steal you away from me 就一直試圖把妳從我身邊搶走 from the moment you took this job Just roughly 85(?) minutes ago 就是大約85分鐘前 (?!) I can't let you go 我不能讓妳走 Because... 因為... I can't stand the thought of you waking up alone 我無法忍受你在外獨自醒來 with no breakfast in bed 還沒有床上早餐 I can't stand the fact 不要上那架飛機! there's no possible way that you just gonna randomly show up to my workplace in the middle of the day And more than anything 還有更重要的 I can't bear the idea that our son will only 我不能忍受我們的兒子 get to know his mother through a computer screen 只能通過電腦螢幕知道他的母親 So I'm begging you 我一直跟你說,是 Gina Don't get on that plane 不要上那架飛機! Stay with him 留下吧! Ok 好吧 I'll stay (crowd clapping) 噢!