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  • Hey, what's up, everyone? My name is Motoki.

    嘿大家好,我是 Motoki。

  • How you guys doing today?

    你們今天好嗎?

  • I'm great, thanks for not asking.

    我很好,謝謝你們的忽略。

  • I just want to take a second and apologize, because I think I have a cold, and my voice sounds so weird right now, I don't even know, sorry.

    我想要花簡短幾秒道個歉,因為我覺得我好像感冒了,讓我的聲音現在聽起來非常怪,我甚至不知道... 抱歉。

  • If you saw my last video or some of my other videos, you know that I'm single. Like, very single.

    如果你有看過我上個影片或是其他的影片,你就會知道我現在仍然單身。就是,非常的單身。

  • But it's cool, I'm fine with it, no biggie.

    但沒差,我很好,沒什麼大不了。

  • You know, I cry myself to sleep sometimes, but whatever.

    你知道,我有時候會哭著入睡,但隨便啦。

  • Having been single for a long time, I've been around a lot of couples, and you know, done some observing.

    我單身了很長一段時間,身旁有著很多對情侶,所以你知道,我於是有了一些觀察。

  • Some stalking, same thing.

    幹過一些跟蹤事,差不多啦。

  • In watching these relationships, I've seen so much stupid stuff that makes me not want a relationship.

    在看了這些戀愛關係後,我見識到了太多愚蠢的事情,讓我變得不想要和別人交往。

  • Now, don't get me wrong, there are obviously great things about relationships, but there are so many things that ruin it for me.

    好,不要誤會了,戀愛關係裡當然有很多美好的事情,但當中也有太多讓我無法接受的蠢事。

  • For example, public displays of affection, a.k.a. PDA.

    舉例來說,在公眾場合曬恩愛,也就是放閃。

  • AKA PDA AKA PDA AKA...

    放閃、放閃、放閃...

  • Okay, chill, chill, chill.

    好了,冷靜冷靜。

  • I'll be walking down the hallways at school, and oh look, couples grinding up on each other against lockers.

    我走在學校的走廊上,然後... 噢,你看,有情侶正靠著儲物櫃卿卿我我 。

  • Awesome.

    好極了。

  • That also goes out to the lovey dovey flirts on Twitter and Instagram.

    還有那些在 Twitter 跟 Instagram 上肉麻的調情。

  • By the way, don't forget to follow me, user name: @motokimaxted. What?

    順帶一提,別忘了追蹤我。我的帳號是 @motokimaxted。啥?

  • I don't want to see you couples seducing each other, okay?

    我不想要看到你們這些情侶互相色誘彼此,好嗎?

  • You can do it privately.

    你們可以私下做。

  • Suppress your hormones.

    克制住你們的賀爾蒙。

  • And they always say the same lame stuff in every single conversation.

    而且他們每次在談話時總是說同樣無趣的話。

  • "Oh my god, I love you."

    「噢我的天啊,我好愛你。」

  • "No bae, I love you so much more."

    「不,寶貝,我愛你更多。」

  • "Oh, I want you inside me."

    「噢,我想要你進到我裡面。」

  • "Uh, what?"

    「呃 ,什麼?」

  • Stop. Stop that shit!

    停。給我停!

  • I just...

    我只是...

  • Ugh, you know?

    呃,你懂吧?

  • It's funny, though, when couples think they're madly in love, when they've literally been dating for like a week.

    不過有趣的是,當情侶們認為他們正愛的轟轟烈烈,但實際上他們也才交往不過一個禮拜而已。

  • Oh yeah, that's love all right.

    喔是喔,啊不就真愛。

  • Like, am I getting invited to the wedding or what?

    所以我哪時候會收到你們的喜帖?

  • Which reminds me, I hate it when couples get so wrapped up in each other, that they stop hanging out with the friends that they've had for years.

    這讓我想到,我最討厭當情侶開始膩在一起之後,便不再和他們多年的老朋友們一起玩。

  • If you stop talking to your friends, then who are you going to turn to if the relationship ends?

    如果你停止跟你的朋友聯絡,那當你的關係告終時你該向誰傾訴呢?

  • But that's none of my business.

    但這不關我的事。

  • And that brings me on to my next point.

    而且這還會帶到下一個我要講的點。

  • Relationships cause so much, so so much unneeded drama, uh, no thank you.

    戀愛關係裡有超級、超級多不必要的爭風吃醋。嗯,不了,謝謝。

  • Another reason why relationships suck is because they're expensive, especially for guys.

    另一個為什麼戀愛關係爛透了的原因,是因為它要花上大量金錢,尤其是對男生而言。

  • Why is it that guys have to pay for everything?

    為什麼總是男生得負責出錢?

  • Come on, society, this is 2014. Where's the equality?

    幫幫忙好嗎,都已經 2014 年了,性別平等在哪裡?

  • Hitler's dead.

    希特勒都已經死了。

  • I've seen guys drop so much money on gifts and dates, and they're like, "Where'd all my money go?"

    我看過男生在買禮物跟約會上砸很多錢,然後在那邊喊:「我的錢都跑到哪裡去了?」

  • While single me is sitting at home like...

    而單身的我在家就像這樣...

  • Something that really annoys me is seeing people in relationships that are constantly unhappy because of their significant other.

    有件特別讓我惱怒的事是,我常看到人們因為自己的另一半而悶悶不樂。

  • That's stupid.

    那真的很愚蠢。

  • Obviously, couples fight, but I'm talking people who are always upset with each other.

    情侶會吵架是理所當然的,但我說的是那些總是對彼此不高興的人。

  • Why do you do that?

    你們為什麼要這麼做?

  • You could be spending time doing stuff that you actually enjoy instead.

    你們可以花時間做一些真正樂在其中的事情。

  • Oh right, my bad. That makes too much sense.

    好吧,是我不好。是我說的太合理了。

  • You know, I've never understood how younger teens date.

    你知道嗎,我一直都無法理解青少年要怎麼談戀愛。

  • I think that at least one person in the relationship needs to be able to drive.

    我覺得情侶中至少要有一個人會開車。

  • I mean, how else are you supposed to go on dates?

    我的意思是,不然你要怎麼出去約會?

  • Isn't that the whole point of dating?

    那不就是整個約會的重點嗎?

  • You know, going on dates, right?

    你知道,出去約會,對吧?

  • Like are these freshman guys going to go up to their girlfriend's house, and be like,

    好比這些高一新生要去他們女朋友的家,然後說,

  • "Ay, come jump on my bicycle! Let's go get some candy!"

    「欸,來跳上我的腳踏車吧!我們去買個糖吃吧!」

  • Y'all are wack.

    你們都是怪胎。

  • I think that sometimes people feel pressured to be in relationships because other people are doing it, so they do it too to try to be cool.

    我覺得有時候有些人是被迫跟別人交往的。因為其他人都在這麼做,所以他們也這麼做,才能看起來很酷。

  • Like guys at my school who find out I don't have a girlfriend will try to convince me to get one.

    就像是我學校的男生發現我沒有女朋友時,總會說服我去交一個。

  • "Come on, dude, get that ass! Get that pussy!"

    「去吧,小伙子,把個妹吧!快把到她!」

  • Like no, I'm good. Thanks, though.

    不,我就算了。不過謝了。

  • Girls, stay away from those guys! There are so many that just want to get in your pants.

    女孩們,妳們要離那種男生遠一點。外面有太多男生只是想「上你」而已。

  • It's ridiculous! Uh, don't get pregnant.

    這實在太荒謬了!呃,小心別懷孕了。

  • Okay so, since we're on the topic, and I get this question a lot. I don't even know why.

    好,既然我們討論到了這個主題,而我也不知為何經常被問到這個問題。

  • But anyone who's wondering, I'm a virgin.

    但是任何在猜想的人,對,我是個處男。

  • "Wow, dude, you're such a loser."

    「哇噢,你這傢伙真是個魯蛇。」

  • Yeah, I don't really care.

    對啦,我根本不在乎。

  • I'm sorry, I don't think about sex 24/7.

    對不起,我不會整天 24 小時都想著性愛。

  • It's more like 23 hours a day.

    只有 23 小時而已啦。

  • Look, I'm obviously curious what it's like, but that's not my first priority in life.

    聽著,我當然很好奇那會是什麼樣的感覺,不過那不是我人生的優先目標。

  • And the same thing goes for relationships. I just want to have fun in high school.

    戀愛對我來說也是這樣,我只是想享受高中生活的樂趣。

  • I don't want to have to worry about another person because I can barely handle myself.

    我並不想還得擔心另一個人,畢竟我連自己都是泥菩薩過江了。

  • I honestly think that people spend way too much time worrying about relationships while they're in school, when instead, they could, oh I don't know, pay attention in class, yeah!

    坦白來說,我認為大家在學校花太多時間在戀愛上面了。其實上他們根本可以,該怎麼說呢?專心上課,對吧!

  • Fuck me, right?

    想罵我,對吧?

  • All right, that's just some of the reasons why I think relationships suck.

    好了,這些就是一些我覺得戀愛關係爛透了的原因。

  • Listen, I'm not trying to hate on anyone who's in relationships.

    聽著,我不是要討厭任何在戀愛關係中的人。

  • Obviously, I've seen teen couples have great times with each other.

    當然,我看過許多相處得很好的情侶。

  • It just depends on who's involved and how mature they are.

    這完全是取決於人,還有他們的成熟度。

  • Plus, it's way more fun to rant about how dumb relationships are.

    而且可以盡情數落戀愛有多麼愚蠢也比較好玩。

  • It's kind of weird, because I feel like I'm missing out on a lot of things being single, but then I order some pizza, and we're all good.

    這是種有點奇怪的感覺,因為我總覺得我好像因為單身而錯過很多東西,但當我在想完然後叫了份披薩後,一切又美好了起來。

  • But who knows, maybe I'll have a girlfriend next month.

    不過誰知道呢,搞不好我下個月就會交到一個女朋友也說不定。

  • Probably not, because I have zero game.

    估計是不會啦,因為我沒有任何「把妹神招」。

  • But you know, there's always a chance.

    不過你懂的,總還是會有一點可能性。

  • But that's all that I have for you guys today.

    不過今天這個影片就到這邊了。

  • My voice is gone. I can't even, ah, blah, blah, blah.

    我快沒聲音了。我甚至不能 @#$%。

  • By the way, for like the three of you who are wondering, this is a mole.

    對了,回答一個大概只有三個人想知道的問題,這是一顆痣。

  • Yep, I'm human, I have those.

    是的,我是人類,我身上有痣。

  • None of you probably care, but I'm extremely self-conscious, and I just wanted to get that off my chest.

    你們可能不在乎,但是我極度地沒自信,而且我真的很想把這個從我胸口移除。

  • But I can't, because it's like literally on my chest.

    但我做不到,因為他真的就長在我胸上。

  • Ha ha, I'm so funny, I should make YouTube videos.

    哈哈,我真好笑,我應該要拍 YouTube 影片的。

  • If you enjoyed the video, please give me a thumbs up, comment, subscribe. You know what to do.

    如果你喜歡這部影片,請給我一個讚、留個言、訂閱。你知道該怎麼做。

  • I appreciate it, thank you guys.

    我很感激,謝謝你們。

  • Also, don't forget to add me on your favorite social media.

    同樣的,別忘記要在你喜歡的社群網站加我。

  • I post daily Snapchats, if you're into that.

    我每天會發 Snapchat,如果你喜歡的話。

  • Thank you guys so much for watching. I'll see you guys soon.

    謝謝你們的觀看,我很快會再跟你們相見。

Hey, what's up, everyone? My name is Motoki.

嘿大家好,我是 Motoki。

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A2 初級 中文 美國腔 戀愛 情侶 單身 男生 關係 影片

你單身嗎?讓 Motoki 來告訴你單身的優點 (Why I'm Single)

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    Penny Lin 發佈於 2021 年 11 月 26 日
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