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The day I got laid off from my job at Martha Stewart
我被瑪莎·史都華解雇的那天
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I was relieved.
我解脫了
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(Laughter)
(笑聲)
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I loved the job, I really did.
我愛這份工作,我真的很喜歡
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But the relationship was over
但這僱傭的關係就此結束
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and I didn't know how to end it
而我也不知道這是如何結束的
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and then it broke up with me.
工作就此和我分道揚鑣
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Don’t you love it when that happens?
你不覺得發生這種事時真是棒透了嗎?
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At the time I’ve been also hosting a radio show
在任職期間,我也是電台頻道主持人
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for the Martha Stewart brand on Sirius XM.
那是天狼星廣播的頻道,也是瑪莎·史都華的節目
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And then not long after that got cancelled, too.
這個節目沒過多久也被取消了
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On the day of my last show
而在我最後一場節目錄製的那天
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I got onto the elevator at the 36th floor
我在36樓搭了電梯
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and as it started to drop,
準備開始向下時
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I started to cry.
我開始流淚
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Every floor took me further and further from what I had been:
電梯越往下,我離我曾經歷的一切也越來越遠
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a magazine editor, a radio host,
我曾經是雜誌編輯,電台主持人
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the person with the cool job to talk about at parties.
擁有一份很酷的工作可以在派對上和大家分享
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You know.
你懂的
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And honestly I had no idea what I was gonna do.
老實的說,我對於接下來要做什麼完全沒想法
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And quite frankly no one was looking for me.
坦白來說,也沒有人想找我工作
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So, I did what anyone would do in that situation.
所以,我做了每個人在這種情況下都會做的事
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I was making some phone calls:
我打了幾通電話
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“Hey, what are you up to?
「嘿,你最近好嗎?
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Did I mention I’m available?”
我有提過我目前處於工作空窗期嗎?
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I needed to get paid to do something, right.
我需要薪水才能過生活對吧?
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I mean I live in New York City.
我的意思是我住在紐約市
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If you’re not paid to do something,
如果我沒有薪水,
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you’re not going to be there very long.
我就沒辦法一直待在這裡」
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But this idea that I had to know what I suppose to do now is that
我了解我現在必須要做的事情就是
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I’m supposed to pursue this passion.
去追求熱情我的熱情所在
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It’s just bugged me.
我只是覺得很煩
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It always had.
真的很煩
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And that’s because it’s a dangerously limiting idea
這是因為,這是個具有危險性的限制性想法
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at the heart of everything we believe
這個想法出現在我們所相信的一切事物上
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about success and life in general.
關於成功和生活
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And it’s that you have one singular passion
你只對一件事物真正有熱情
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and your job is to find it
你的工作就是找到他
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and to pursue it to the exclusion of all else.
排除萬難去追尋
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And if you do that
如果你這樣做
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everything will fall into place
每件事情都會漸漸到位
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and if you don’t, you failed.
如果你沒有追到,就代表你失敗了
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The pressure starts really young
這壓力在很早就出現了
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and it goes your whole life,
並會伴隨這你的一生
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but it’s perhaps most pronounced when you’re graduating from school, right.
但這最明顯的時期會出現在你剛從學校畢業,對吧?
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After this, “Wow, the world's at your feet! What are you going to do now?”
哇,這世界盡在你腳底,你現在想要做什麼呢?
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And it’s so intimidating,
而這實在很嚇人
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it's like picking a major for life.
就像你一生只能選一個專業
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You know, I had a hard enough time picking a major for four years
我在選擇主修的這四年間曾面臨到難題
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and I changed that once, if not twice.
我在選擇主修的這四年間曾面臨到難題
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I mean it was like just intimidating, right?
我認為這真的很可怕,對吧?
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And this compelling
而且又具強制性
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I mean this really, you know,
這是真的
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forceful cultural imperative to choose your passion,
我認為這是非常強制的文化要求讓你去選擇你的熱情
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it’s stressful to me,
對我來說是壓力
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but it’s not just me,
但不只是我這樣認為
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it’s everyone I talk to agrees with me.
我分享過的人都同意
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The woman who sold me this dress.
賣我這件裙子的女生
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I told her what I needed the dress for, what I was talking about
我告訴她穿這衣服的場合及分享演講內容
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and she said, “Oh my gosh,
她說「我的天阿,
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I really need to hear this talk, because I just graduate from school.
我真的需要聽這個演講,因為我正剛從學校畢業。
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My friends and I we don’t know what we’re passionate about,
而我和我的朋友都不知道我們的熱情在哪裡,
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we don’t know what we supposed to do.”
我們不知道我們應該要做什麼事。」
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I’m leery of passion for a few reasons.
我不相信熱情有幾個原因
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But one of them is that passion is not a plan,
但其中之一是熱情它並不是個計畫,
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it’s a feeling.
它是一種感覺
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And feelings change.
和想改變的念頭
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They do.
它們是
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You can be passionate about a person one day, a job,
你可以對一個人或工作熱情一天
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and then not passionate the next.
而隔天你就對他們失去熱情
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We know this and yet we continue
我們知道這點,但只持續
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to use passion as the yardstick
用熱情作衡量標準
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to judge everything by,
去評斷每件事務
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instead of seeing passion for what it really is:
而不去找出我們真正的熱情:
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the fire that ignites when you start rubbing sticks together.
就像當你開始鑽木,火才會點燃
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Anyway, I was such a mess when I was in my twenties,
無論如何,我自己的20幾歲也是一團糟,
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such a mess.
糟透了
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I was anxious and depressed and had no life to speak of,
當時的我,焦慮又沮喪根本無生活可言
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I was temping to keep my options open,
我試著開放我的選項,
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and I was sitting around at night in my underwear
晚上我穿著內衣褲無所事事
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watching Seinfeld reruns.
看重播宋飛正傳
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Actually I still do that, that’s not the worst thing in the world to do.
實際上我現在還是這樣做,這並不是世界上最糟的事情
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It’s fine.
這沒什麼
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But I called my mother every night crying
但當我每晚打給我媽媽訴苦
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and I was turning away perfectly good full-time jobs.
我拒絕了那些完美的全職工作邀約
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Why? Because I was afraid.
為什麼?因為我很害怕
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I was sure that I would pick the wrong one
我很確信我的選擇錯誤
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and get on the wrong train headed to the wrong future.
並搭上錯誤的火車駛向錯誤的未來
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My mother begged me, she said, “Please, take a job, any job.
我媽媽乞求找份工作,她說「拜託,快去找份工作,任何工作都好,
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You’re not going to be stuck, you’re stuck now!
妳不會因此被困住,妳現在就已經被困住了!
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You don’t create your life first, and then live it.
你不先創造生活並生存下去。
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You create it by living it, not agonizing about it.”
你要先創造並生存而不是一直煩惱。」
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She’s right, she’s always right.
她是對的,她永遠都是對的。
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And so I took a full-time job as an assistant
後來,我接了一份全職的助理工作
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at a management consulting firm, where I knew nothing about nothing.
在管理顧問公司,而我對這份工作一無所知
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Okay. Zero.
對就是零
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Except I knew I had a reason to get up in the morning, get showered,
除了給了我一個早上起床、洗澡、
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leave the house,
離開家,
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people who were waiting for me when I got there
有人在公司等我的理由之外
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and I got a paycheck every two weeks.
而且每兩周可領薪資
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And that is as good a reason to take a job as any.
這理由已足夠讓我接受這份工作
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Did I know that I want to be an office administrator
我會想做辦公行政
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for the rest of my life? No! I had no idea!
作為未來的職涯?不,我一點概念都沒有!
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Truly!
真的!
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But this idea that everything you're supposed to do
但每件你做的事情
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should fit into this passion vertical is unrealistic.
都應該要符合你的熱情,這是個不切實際的想法
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And I’ll say it - elitist.
我會說這是菁英主義
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You show me someone who washes windows for a living
你告訴我有人靠洗窗戶過生活
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and I will bet you a million dollars
而我和你打賭一百萬美金
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it’s not because he has a passion for clean glass.
他不是因為對洗玻璃有熱情
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One of my favourite columns is a piece by Dilbert creator Scott Adams.
我最愛的專欄之一是史考特亞當的作品呆伯特
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He wrote a piece in The Wall Street Journal a few years ago,
幾年前,他寫了一則報導在華爾街日報
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about how he failed his way to success.
有關他為什麼在他的成功之路上失敗
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And one of his jobs was a commercial loan officer.
而其中一份工作是商業貸款人員
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And he was taught specifically:
而他被特別教導說:
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"Do not loan money to someone following their passion."
「不要借給那些追隨熱情的人。」
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(Laughter)
(笑聲)
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No, loan it to someone who wants to start a business,
錢是要借給那些想要創業
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the more boring, the better.
越無趣越好的人。
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(Laughter)
(笑聲)
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Adam says that in his life success fueled passion
亞當說,在他的生活中,成功激起熱情
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more than passion fueled success.
遠大於熱情帶動了成功
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When I got my first job as a magazine editor, in publishing,
當我拿到我第一份雜誌編輯的工作時,
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I was thrilled.
我超興奮的
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But I had to take pretty big pay cut,
但我必須要減少相當大部份的薪水,
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because at the time I’d been a catalogue copywriter at a wig company.
因為當時我是位假髮公司的目錄文案
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(Laughter)
(笑聲)
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Laugh if you will, clearly you are and many, many people did.
你當然會笑,基本上你和許多人都會
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But wigs paid.
但假髮公司還是會付我薪水
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So I had to figure out a way to make some money.
而我必須要想個方法去賺錢
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A friend of mine invited me to a jewelry party
而我的朋友邀請我去一個珠寶派對
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I said, "What is a jewelry party?"
我說「什麼是珠寶派對?」
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She said, “It’s like Tupperware but with bracelets.”
她說「就像特百惠(塑膠容器公司)但變成項鍊。」
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I said, “Okay, got it, got it.”
我說,「我知道了。」
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I went and I had the best time.
我去參加了派對並有個美好的時光
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I was there hanging out, trying on jewelry,
我在現場隨意逛逛並試戴珠寶
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the salespersons having a great time
而銷售人員和我一樣有個美好的時光
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and I was like, "That’s a job.
讓我感覺到,「這才是工作阿。
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I could...
我可以...
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I could do that."
我也可以這樣。」
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I mean, really, she seems to be having a great time.
我指的是她真的看起來很享受其中
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Now, I had no background in sales,
而我並沒有任何銷售的背景
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unless you count Girl Scouts, and I was terrible.
除非你把女童軍活動也算進去,而那個我做得很糟
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And I had no passion for jewelry.
而且我對珠寶並無任何熱情
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I mean, honestly, my earrings cost 20 $. Combined, all of them.
我老實的說,我的整組耳環只花了20元美金
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And yet I was like, "I think I can sling silver jewelry to suburban moms
而我覺得「我也可以向住郊區喝著黛克瑞的媽媽
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drinking daiquiris.
銷售銀飾。
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Yes, I could do that."
是的,我可以這麼做。」
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And so I did it, I signed up, I became a Silpada Designs rep.
接著我就去註冊了,我成為珠寶設計人員。
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And I…
而我...
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Listen to me, I was not setting a world on fire right away.
聽我說,我一開始表現並沒有特別突出
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Really. I was so awkward and afraid of selling.
真的。我覺得尷尬並害怕去銷售。
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And then I got better,
後來情況逐漸變好,
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I got better,
變更好了。
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I started making some money,
我開始賺到些錢。
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I started getting really passionate about it.
我開始有了銷售珠寶的熱情
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Not just because of the money, but because
並不是因為錢而是
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what I realized was people wanted the stuff.
我真的了解到人們想買的東西。
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They were happy to pay for it.
他們會為了它開心的付錢
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I sold so much jewelry that year I won a free trip to Saint Thomas.
那年我賣了很多珠寶。我贏得了聖托馬斯的免費旅行
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(Laughter)
(笑聲)
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It’s true.
這是真的
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I eventually let my jewelry business go, because my career path shifted.
因為職涯規劃的轉變,後來我離開了珠寶行業
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But I was so glad that I did that.
但我很開心我下了這個決定
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Because it planted an entrepreneurial seed I didn’t know was there.
因為它種下了企業家的種子,而我並不知道它的存在
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And that bears fruit to this day.
而這種子在這天成熟結果
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Now as you know an entire cottage industry has sprung up
現在你知道,整個行業已經開始蓬勃發展
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around helping people find their passions, right.
幫助人們找到他們的熱情
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Books, coaching, webinars, whatever.
寫書、提供指導、網路研討會等等
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And their hearts in the right place, it’s great, I’m all about self-discovery.
他們的心在正確的地方,這是偉大的,而我自己是崇尚自我探索
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Okay.
好
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But when you ask someone, or you’re asked like,
但如果你問別人
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"What’s your passion?"
「你的熱情在是什麼?」
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It’s triggering.
這會觸發他的想像
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It’s like, "Oh my god, I have to come up with a good answer for this."
就像是,「我的天阿,我一定要想個好的答案來回答。」
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One of my friends in her mid-forties and she’s looking
我的朋友在她四十歲中期時,在思考說
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what’s her life going to be now.
她希望的生活可以變成什麼樣子
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And she’s like, “I don’t know what I’m passionate about.”
而她覺得,「我不懂你到底在熱情什麼。」
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And she’s legitimately concerned about this.
她很擔心這件事情
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She’s ready to hire a team of people.
她準備聘請了一組人來幫她尋找熱情
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It’s like, why are we worrying about this?
我們為什麼這麼擔心這件事呢?
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You know why, because she thinks something wrong with her.
你知道嗎,因為她覺得她自己不對勁
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I thought something was wrong with me when I was in the seventh grade
在我七年級時,我感受到自己的格格不入
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and everyone was really into like
當所有人都迷
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the rock-bands and their actors
搖滾樂團和演員,
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and they would carve the names of those bands in a tables in a library.
而且會把這些團體的名字刻在圖書館的桌子上
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And I never carved anything, because I couldn’t think of anything to carve.
而我從來不刻任何字,因為我想不到任何東西可以讓我刻在上面
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I mean I liked Bon Jovi as much as the next girl,
就像我對喜歡邦喬飛就跟隔壁的女孩一樣
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but not enough to deface school property, you know.
但沒有喜歡到足以去破壞學校資產,你懂得
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(Laughter)
(笑聲)
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It’s probably why I don’t have any tattoos either.
這就是為什麼我也沒有刺青,
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I’m assuming that’s why.
我假設這是我無法融入的原因
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I was really boring, I thought something was wrong with me.
我認為這很無趣,我以為是我格格不入
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But that’s the fear, isn’t it?
但其實是因為害怕,不是嗎?
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That when someone asks you at a party, on a date, at a job interview,
就像有人邀請你參加派對、約會或工作面試
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"What are you passionate about?"
「你的熱情是什麼?」
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That you're not going to have this wow compelling answer.
如果你沒有給出一個令人驚艷的答案
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And that’s mean that you’re not interesting, or ambitious,
就代表你對這沒有興趣,或沒有野心
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or that you don’t have a singular obsession
亦或者是,你將令人著迷的特點
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or scary talent that you hiding.
或你隱藏的驚人天賦
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And that your life isn’t worth living.
導致你的生活了無生趣
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And it’s not true.
而那不是正確的
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Passion is not a job, a sport, or a hobby.
熱情並不是一份工作、運動或興趣
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It is the full force of your attention
它給你強大的注意力
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and energy that you give to whatever is right in front of you.
和能量讓你能應付你眼前任何事情
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And if you’re so busy looking for this passion,
如果你忙到找不到你的熱情
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you could miss opportunities that change your life.
你可能會錯失改變你一生的機會
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You could also miss out on a great love.
你也可能會錯過偉大的愛
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Because that’s what happens when you have tunnel vision,
當你只用狹隘的眼光
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trying to find the One.
去尋找那唯一
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We all think we know the kind of person we are
我想我們都知道自己是屬於哪種人
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and the kind of person we could love.
和會愛上哪種類型的人
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But sometimes we’re wrong.
但有時候我們錯了
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Blissfully wrong.
幸福的完全錯了
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And sometimes you don’t know what you're going to do next, right?
而有時候你不知道下一步在哪,對吧?
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I mean, I don’t.
像我,我不知道
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I love not knowing what I’m going to be doing five years from now
我喜歡自己不知道未來五年要做什麼
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or I will be into.
或是不知道會對什麼有興趣
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And that’s okay, it’s okay not to know.
對於不知道未來是沒問題的
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You know why?
你知道嗎?
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Because the most fulfilling relationships,
因為這是最滿足的關係
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the most fulfilling careers
最令人滿意的工作
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are those that still have the power to surprise you.
就是總是會有讓你驚喜的的地方
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And as for the things you know you want to do.
至於那些你知道你想做的事情
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You want to write a book, you want to start a business,
你想寫本書,你想開始創業
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you want to change careers.
你想轉職,
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Great!
很棒!
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But if you’re sitting around waiting for passion to show up and take it,
但如果你只是坐著等待你的熱情出現並帶領你
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you’re going to be waiting a long time.
你一定會等很長一段時間
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So don’t wait.
所以別等了
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Instead, spend your time and attention
別花時間和精力
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solving your favourite problems.
在解決你最愛的問題上
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Look for problems that need solving.
試著去找那些真的該解決的問題。
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Be useful,
讓自己做個有用
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generous.
和大方的人
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People will thank you, and hug you and pay you for it
人們會感激你、擁抱你和回報你所做的付出
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and that’s where passion is.
這才是熱情的展現
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Where your energy and effort meets someone else’s need.
當你的精力和努力符合別人的需求
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That’s when you realize:
你就會了解:
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passion lives,
熱情的存在
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and realizing what you have to contribute.
並了解你的貢獻的事物
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Why do you think when we’re asking people what they’re passionate about,
你認為當你問別人說他們的熱情是什麼
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they say, "Helping other people."?
他們會回說「幫助他人。」?
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So don’t wait.
所以別等了
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Listen to my mother.
聽我媽媽的話
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Just start doing.
開始行動吧