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  • [SHOW THEME SONG]

  • -Ah, I don't understand.

  • -What is it?

  • Can I help you?

  • -I want to select that file.

  • -Oh, OK.

  • I'll show you.

  • That's basically you just, you know, point your mouse to it,

  • and then you hit this button to select.

  • -Ah, duh.

  • I'm terrible with computers.

  • Tell me, do I buy a hard disk, a floppy disk, or--

  • -Oh, brother, do you have a lot to learn.

  • -Maybe you could show me some stuff.

  • Say over a drink tonight?

  • -Oh yeah, if you're serious.

  • -OK, it's a date.

  • -Well, when?

  • Where?

  • -I'll email you.

  • -You've got mail.

  • -Hot damn.

  • -So I'm going to meet her this afternoon.

  • -Don't forget to bring your rubbers.

  • -Ha, ha, we're just having a drink.

  • -Um-hm.

  • -I'm hearing wedding bells.

  • She sounds cute.

  • -You have never even met her.

  • -With the name like Molly, she has to be cute.

  • [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

  • -Hey, this is the headlines.

  • My name is David Wain, brought to you by Ajax Dishwasher to

  • do.

  • -David.

  • -Oh, hey.

  • -Hi.

  • -Hey.

  • So.

  • -So.

  • -So.

  • I don't want to overwhelm you all at once.

  • So I thought we'd just start with the basics of OS X before

  • we get into like web design, and HTML, and programming in

  • Linux, and kernel panics, and habeas corpus--

  • -David.

  • Stop.

  • I just wanted an excuse to go out with you.

  • I don't really care about computers.

  • -What--

  • Have you seen Leopard?

  • -I care about getting to know you.

  • All I know is that you're this sexy guy, who's always in the

  • coffee shop.

  • What do you do for a living?

  • -Well I work in this place, which is apparently some kind

  • of sweatshop.

  • How about you?

  • -I'm a fashion editor for a top magazine.

  • -Ah.

  • -Otherwise, I'm just a single gal, who is curious about the

  • guy behind those sexy lips.

  • -Hey, Molly.

  • -Ah, Landon.

  • Oh, my God.

  • David, this is my friend Landon.

  • Landon, this is David.

  • You don't mind if Landon joins us, do you?

  • -No.

  • -No.

  • Oh-oh, what's the matter?

  • -I just got dumped.

  • -Ah.

  • -I want to kill myself.

  • -Oh, no, my baby, baby boy.

  • I just can't wallow in it though , you know?

  • -No, no.

  • -Hey, do you want to go dancing?

  • -Ah, yes.

  • -OK.

  • -Come on, David.

  • [DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

  • [CELL PHONE RINGS]

  • -Oh, shit.

  • It's my editor.

  • Ah, I have to go.

  • I'll call you both tomorrow, OK?

  • -And then there were two.

  • -I, I'm probably going to go hit the hay.

  • -Fuck me.

  • -What?

  • I can't wait any longer.

  • No more games, you have it.

  • -Molly.

  • -What?

  • Oh, I just pulled that whole that's-my-editor routine so

  • you two could be alone together, so?

  • Did you guys hook up or what?

  • -What?

  • -Wait, you're not trying to tell me you're straight?

  • -Well, yeah.

  • -So you weren't saying I'm gay and I want you to set me up

  • with another gay man to have sex?

  • -No.

  • -So I'm crazy?

  • I just made it up out of thin air?

  • -Yeah.

  • Pretty much.

  • -There you are.

  • Been looking all over for you.

  • Let's go into the bathroom, have sex, do a few lines of

  • co-co-co-co-co.

  • -Sorry, Landon, I'm not--

  • -You're not what?

  • -I'll give you a hint.

  • Oh, hi.

  • I want to have sex with other guys.

  • -Great.

  • What's the problem?

  • -No, I'm saying I'm not that.

  • -You're straight?

  • Thanks a lot, Molly.

  • Some friend you turned out to be.

  • -Aw.

  • -Next time don't set me up with some four-eyed

  • boob-loving Jew from Ohio.

  • -I'm sorry, David.

  • How can I make it up to you?

  • -Well, do you want to dance with me?

  • -Well, my ankle is in excruciating pain, but OK.

  • [SLOW DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

  • Aw.

  • Aw.

  • What is your problem?

  • [MUSIC PLAYING]

  • What's the matter, mother, don't you love me?

  • No, I don't.

  • I regretted having you the moment you slithered

  • out of my baby hole.

[SHOW THEME SONG]

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Wainy Days #20 'Molly' (Michael Showalter) (Wainy Days #20 'Molly' (Michael Showalter))

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    紅謹 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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