Nothing is wrong.

沒什麼啦。

You said you needed to talk. Are you okay?

你說你需要找人談談。你真的沒事？

I'm fine; I just have news.

我真的沒事；只是有消息要跟你說。

What news? Which news? (mumbles)

到底是什麼事啊？哪件事啊？（喃喃自語）

Don't freak out, don't freak out.

你可別嚇壞喔，別嚇壞喔。

Okay, calm down, I'm not going to freak out. Just tell me.

好，冷靜，我才不會被嚇壞。告訴我吧。

Promise you won't freak out?

跟我保證絕不會崩潰？

Stop, look at me, I'm chill AF. (AF stands for as fuck)

拜託，看看我，我他媽超冷靜的好不好。

I'm dating Josh.

我和 Josh 在交往。

But you're mine.

但你是我的。

Obviously.

你是呀。

Do you know how lucky you are?

你知道你有多幸運嗎？

Do you... do you know how lucky you are?

你⋯你真的知道自己有多幸運嗎？

I just... I just don't want to lose you.

我只是⋯我只是不想失去你。

Don't be dumb.

別傻了。

And if you ever hurt her, I will kill you.

如果你敢傷害她，我絕不饒你。

Wait, wait, you still love me the most, right?

等等，等等，你還是比較愛我的吧，對吧？

Always, forever, always.

一直都是啊，永遠都是。

Dude, wait. You know, honestly, man, I'm like really happy Colleen is dating you.

兄弟，等等。你知道嗎，老實說我很高興聽到你和 Colleen 交往的消息。

You're like, a really good guy, man.

感覺你是個很不錯的男人。

You can't forget about me.

你不能忘了我喔。

I won't!

我才不會！

Let me tell you something.

告訴你一件事。

Come here, come here, come here, come here, come here.

來來來來來。

If you even look at another girl, I don't give an F if it's your sister, okay?

你如果敢看別的女生，就算是你妹也一樣，懂嗎？

I will destroy you.

我會二話不說毀了你。

Wait, I'm still your soulmate, right?

等等，我仍是你的靈魂伴侶，對吧？

Of course.

當然呀。

Okay.

好。

Oh my God, what are we watching?

天啊，現在播的是什麼節目啊？

Oh.

噢。

This is so great.

這棒了。

(mumbles) I'm just really happy she found you. Let me talk. I'm just...

（自言自語攻勢）我真的很高興她看上了你。讓我說完。我只是⋯

You're great.

你真的是很棒。你真的是很棒。

Okay, listen. I didn't want to bring this up because it's a little bit awkward and I know, I get it.

來，聽著。我其實不想提起此事因為這會有些尷尬，我知道、我懂。

It's like... it's a little bit of a third wheel situation going on, and...

這就像⋯這就像是三角關係一樣，而且⋯

Yeah.

是這樣沒錯。

You need to leave.

你需要迴避一下。

Me?

我？

Sorry.

抱歉了。

Go ahead.

去吧。

- Have you seen this part before? It's so good. - I know. It's so us.

- 你看過這個了嗎？這超讚的。- 我知道。這根本是我們啊。

I love her!

我愛她！

Aww, babe, I love you too.

喔，親愛的，我也愛妳。

You're like, my favorite person ever.

妳是我畢生的摯愛。

Oh, stop, promise?

喔，天啊，你發誓？

Promise, obviously, F this guy.

我發誓，絕無虛假，去你的男人。

Honestly, who do you think you are?

說實話，你以為你是誰啊？

Yeah, this is my wife.

對啊，這可是我老婆。

That's my wife right there!

是、我、老、婆！

Don't worry, he knows his place.

放心，他知道自己的地位。

(crosstalk)

(唱雙簧中)

Seriously, babe, it means so much that you took time out of your schedule just to be with me.

寶貝，我很認真的跟妳說，謝謝妳花了這麼多時間只為了跟我待在一起。

Guys, we are so cute.

大夥，我們的關係真的是太獨特了。

Oh, I know!

喔，我懂！

Yay, us!

耶，妳懂！

Oh my God, babe, I got a plus one to this event.

喔我的天哪，我可以攜伴參加這個活動耶。

That's awesome, babe, I can't wait to...

真是太棒了，親愛的，我等不及要⋯

Oh my God, what are we going to wear?

喔我的天哪，那我們該穿什麼好？

I am so excited!

我超興奮的！

I hope we're friends forever.

我希望我們會是永遠的朋友。

I don't know what I'd do without you.

真不知道如果沒有妳我要怎麼辦。

Gross.

噁心。

Stop!

停！

Okay, I love you, too, babe.

好啊，我也愛你，寶貝。

I love you.

我愛妳。

I love you, too.

我也愛你。

You're so beautiful.

妳好美。

Aww, you're so handsome.

喔，你也好帥。

Thank you. You're my forever sunshine.

謝謝。你對我而言就像是太陽般的存在。

Aww, that's so cute.

喔，聽起來真窩心。

When I saw you today, it was like the first time...

今天見到妳就猶如最初那樣一見鍾情...

Aww, that's so romantic.

喔，好浪漫喔。

You're my forever moonshine.

你就像是跟永遠隨著我的月亮。

I like that.

我喜歡這種比喻。

Yeah, it's like alcohol, but also, it's a moon.

對，你就像我的酒精，同時也是我的月亮。

Right.

你說得對。

It's like my two favorite things.

那是我最喜歡的兩樣東西。

It's like ying and yang, it's the opposites, but they belong together.

就像陰與陽，凡事都有正反，卻能融合在一起。

Hope you enjoyed that video!

希望你會喜歡這部影片！

Thank you so much.

謝謝兩位大力相助。

(crosstalk)

(除了感謝還是感謝)

They're so wonderful, they have awesome channels, so make sure you check out the links in the description to see Josh's and Colleen's channels because they're awesome sauce.

他們真的是太棒啦，他們有很棒的頻道，別忘了點選說明欄裡的連結去 Josh 和 Colleen 他們的頻道看看喔，因為他們真的是太厲害了。

If you like this video, make sure you give it a thumbs up.

如果你喜歡這部影片，請幫忙按個讚。

Make sure you comment below and check out my last video right there.

留言並持續關注我最新的影片，這邊。

You may also check out my vlogs right there.

你也可以去我的影像網誌瞧瞧，這邊。

All of the links are in the description.

全部的連結都在說明欄。

Other than that, make sure you subscribe because I make new videos every Monday and Thursday.

除此之外，別忘了按訂閱因為我在每周一和周四都會更新。

I'm going to do my very complicated outro, do you guys...

最後不免俗地要一起來個結尾，你們...

Yes. Okay, ready? One love.

好喔。Ok，都準備好了嗎？先比一個愛心。

Superwoman... that is a wrap.

超人...慶祝這部影片殺青啦。

And, zoop! Thanks, bye!

謝謝觀賞，下次見！

(crosstalk)

(自言自語)

You're so manly.

你真的好 man。

So I'm sun, and you're moon.

我是太陽，而你是月亮。

...shut the fuck up...

⋯閉嘴⋯

Why is this happening?

怎麼會這樣？