A LOT OF KIDS ARE GRADUATING FROM COLLEGE

AND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THEY'RE GONNA DO.

I DID NOT GO TO COLLEGE.

THAT'S WHY I HAD TO GET DRUNK THE OLD FASHIONED WAY.

[laughter]

WITH STRANGERS AT A BUS STATION.

AND EVEN THOUGH I DIDN'T GO TO COLLEGE,

I HAVE BEEN ABLE TO GET BY ON MY LOOKS.

I MEAN, I AM A COVERGIRL.

[cheers and applause]

IT REALLY IS GREAT.

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THAT Y'ALL BECOME COVERGIRLS IF YOU CAN,

'CAUSE IT'S REALLY, REALLY FUN.

IT'S EASY. I CAN ACTUALLY TEACH YOU HOW.

I'VE TAUGHT OTHER PEOPLE.

LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO ONE OF MY FORMER STUDENTS.

PLEASE WELCOME MY FELLOW COVERGIRL, TAYLOR SWIFT.

HI, TAYLOR. - HI.

- SO HERE'S WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN.

YOU'RE GONNA HELP ME TEACH PEOPLE

HOW TO BECOME A COVERGIRL LIKE I TAUGHT YOU.

- OH, YEAH, YEAH, I OWE EVERYTHING TO YOU.

- RIGHT. OKAY.

SO TELL PEOPLE WHAT YOU WERE DOING

BEFORE I SHOWED YOU HOW TO BECOME A COVERGIRL.

- GETTING DRUNK WITH STRANGERS AT A BUS STATION.

- THAT'S RIGHT.

EXACTLY.

AND NOW LOOK AT YOU.

YOU LOOK AMAZING. - THANK YOU.

[cheers and applause]

IT'S MY NATURELUXE SILK FOUNDATION.

[laughter]

- THAT'S THE FIRST RULE IN BEING A GOOD COVERGIRL.

ALWAYS SELL YOUR PRODUCT. NOT THAT YOU NEED TO.

PEOPLE LOVE THE SMOOTH, SILKY FEEL OF NATURELUXE.

- YES, THAT'S RIGHT, ELLEN.

WOMEN ARE RAVING ABOUT IT

BECAUSE IT'S MADE WITH REAL DIAMONDS AND MAGIC.

- THAT'S RIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT. [cheers and applause]

OKAY, THE NEXT THING YOU NEED TO KNOW

IS HOW TO LOOK LIKE A COVERGIRL.

SO, TAYLOR, I'M GONNA HAVE YOU

DEMONSTRATE SOME OF THE THINGS THAT I TAUGHT YOU

IN ORDER TO BE A COVERGIRL, OKAY?

- OKAY. - OKAY.

FIRST OF ALL, YOU HAVE TO SQUINT.

SO SQUINT.

OKAY, SQUINT MORE LIKE YOU'RE LOOKING RIGHT INTO THE SUN.

THE SUN IS BLINDING-- YOU'RE SQUINTING--RIGHT.

AND NOW POUT YOUR LITTLE LIPS.

POOF YOUR LIPS OUT LIKE THAT.

YOUR LIPS--LIKE YOU'RE TRYING TO GET A STRAW

AND SOMEONE'S MOVING IT AWAY FROM YOU.

SQUINT! SQUINT WHILE DOING IT.

SQUINT LOOKING INTO THE SUN, BRIGHT SUN.

SQUINT! TRY TO GET THE STRAW.

GET THE STRAW.

AND SQUINT! GOOD.

ALL RIGHT, AND COVERGIRLS NEVER WALK.

THEY DON'T WALK THEY TROT.

THEY TROT LIKE HORSES TRYING TO AVOID PUDDLES.

SO SQUINT AND TRY TO GET THE STRAW.

SQUINT AND TRY TO GET--

DON'T GET IN THE PUDDLE.

TROT! TROT BUT NOT IN THE PUDDLES.

AND YOU'RE ANGRY. YOU'RE ANGRY.

YOU'RE SO ANGRY THAT YOU'RE PRETTY.

YOU'RE PRETTY, AND YOU'RE ANGRY ABOUT IT.

SQUINT! LOOK IN THE SKY.

TROT. GET OUT OF THE PUDDLE.

YOU'RE IN A PUDDLE.

LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD AND SQUINT AND--

GOOD. ISN'T SHE AMAZING?

[cheers and applause]

YEAH.

[cheers and applause]

IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT BEING EASY.

IT'S ALSO ABOUT BEING BREEZY, SO PUT THE FAN ON.

COME ON, YOU'RE EASY AND YOU'RE BREEZY.

- IT'S NOT ABOUT BEING EASY.

[laughter] OKAY.

- GO! - WHAT?

BREEZY. EASY.

EASY AND BREEZY! - OKAY.

- BEAUTIFUL. COVERGIRL.

- WITH THE TROT?

- THE TROT, SQUINT!

TRY TO GET THE STRAW!

TRY TO GET THE STRAW.

YOU'RE IN A PUDDLE.

GET OUT OF IT. TROT OUT OF THE PUDDLE.

GOOD.

RIGHT.

THE STRAW IS GETTING AWAY FROM YOU.

BEAUTIFUL!

OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL!

[cheers and applause]

OH, I REALLY DO LOVE BEING A COVERGIRL,

AND Y'ALL CAN BE COVERGIRLS TOO.

JUST TRY THEIR NATURELUXE FOUNDATION

WITH YOUR $100 CVS PHARMACY GIFT CARD.

[cheers and applause]