- I don't really know much about tuxedos

我對燕尾服不是很了解~

except for that penguins wear them.

但我知道企鵝都穿它。

- I don't know. I feel indifferent.

我不知道耶~無所謂啦!

- Normally, I would be concerned

正常來說(穿女裝時)~我會比較關心......

that I'm not gonna be able to move my arms,

嗯~我的手臂也許不太好動，

because my shoulders will get stuck,

因為肩膀會卡卡的，

but because this is a men's suit,

但這是男生的衣服，

I have a feeling it might fit my shoulders better.

所以我覺得肩膀部分可能比較合身~

- No one in my family really wears tuxes or suits.

我家沒有人常穿燕尾服(正式宴會服)，

I just imagine that anything has to be

所以我想像說任何東西都一定比.....

more comfortable than what women wear.

女生穿的......衣服還舒適，

- I think it leaves room for your dick

我想他還為你的(小鳥)留空間，

'cause it's like really long in the front.

因爲褲襠做的還蠻長的~

- Worrying about one part

有點擔心一部份~

that dudes do not have to worry about,

男生不用在意的，

which is the breasts.

哪面可以放奶奶(正反面)呀?

- I don't know.

我不知道~~~!

I don't know how to read boy sizes.

我不知道男生的sizes是怎麼搞得?

It's just like 27, 32, 45.

它們一下 27 32 45 (間距大)

It's like, oh are we doing football plays?

所以我們在玩美式足球嗎?(背號)

- (scoffs indistinctly).

(悄悄的抱怨著)

- Why would anyone want to wear this on their wedding day?

為什麼會有人穿這個結婚呀!?

This is the most uncomfortable thing.

這絕對是最不舒服的衣服!

- I feel like I look like one of those

我覺得...我看起來像

1930s big band singers.

1930年代的樂團巨星~!

♫ Hey man, won't you let the band play

♫ 老兄~喜不喜歡我的表演?

♫ Hey man, won't you let the band play ♫

♫ 老兄~喜不喜歡我的表演?

- Oh, I'm not used to buttoning all the buttons.

嗯~我不習慣扣上所有鈕扣~

(gasps) I feel like I'm being suffocated.

(氣喘喘~)我覺得要窒息了~!

- This you should put in slow motion.

再來加個帥氣的慢動作~

Ahh.

Ahh~~

- There's so many things.

有太多配件了吧?!

I have no idea how to do this. (laughs)

我根本不知道這要怎麼穿~

This can't fit over my head.

它根本穿不過我的頭呀~

- (snorts) You guys wear these?

(喉嚨不舒服)你們男人都穿這個??

- Oh, f##k yeah!

喔~我他x的超帥!

Oh, hell yeah!

老天!我帥爆了~

Okay, well it kinda looks like I have a diaper on.

嗯~好吧，它讓我看起來像穿著尿布

- It's making me realize I really like

它讓我了解到---

the woman's fit on my body.

我比較喜歡女性合身的服飾

I prefer a tighter pant.

我比較喜歡緊一點的褲子

- I always was like, oh guys have it so easy

我曾一直認為-噢~男生穿衣服實在太簡單了--

because suits are comfortable and they can move around,

因為西裝是很舒適的(她以前認為)，而且他們還可以自由伸展~

and dresses are terrible 'cause you're basically like

但禮服實在太可怕，因為基本上來說你

stuck in one position all night.

根本就是像電線桿一樣，整晚維持同一個姿勢。

But suits are not comfortable.

但西裝真的不太舒服~

Guys have it bad in just a different kind of way.

男生也感到如此不舒服，只是不同的方式而已。

- I guess I wasn't giving guys enough credit

我想我以前沒給男生太多讚賞，

for how they were wearing tuxes and putting tuxes together

因為(我現在才知道)穿西裝和燕尾服，

because this was more work than I expected.

實際上比我想的複雜多了~~!

- And it's got pockets!

它......竟然有口袋?? (驚訝)

- (grunts) Do I look like Count Dracula?

(咳~嗯~)我看起來有比較像德古拉(吸血鬼)了嗎?