Name: 不是開玩笑的！如果你的女友真的是瘋子... (If Your Girlfriend Was Actually Crazy)
Uploaded: 2022-05-28T21:01:10.000Z
Duration: 2 min 36 s

抱歉，兄弟。都是我女朋友啦。

動名詞

She gets pissed off at me for going to the bar too much, so I said I’m not at the bar.

她因為我太常去酒吧氣炸了，所以我就跟她說我沒去酒吧。

結果她在酒吧抓包我的時候更氣了。

Just the other day, my girlfriend goes all psycho on me because she thought I was flirting with some chick at the bank.

有一天，我女朋友對我發神經，因為她以為我在銀行裡跟一些年輕女生調情。

And then, on the way home, she captures this chipmunk.

然後，在回家的路上，她抓了一隻花栗鼠。

And she's been torturing it for, like, the past week.

她過去大概一個禮拜都在折磨牠。

You know, she's got this chipmunk and she keeps in the shoebox, and like, she does this little experiment on it, you know.

牠抓到一支花栗鼠，然後把牠關在鞋盒裡，然後對牠做一些小實驗，你知道的。

And, I'm not the jealous type, right? Like, you know that about me. I'm not jealous!

而且，我不是容易吃醋那一型，對吧？你知道的，我不是那種人。我不吃醋！

But, she has this necklace that's made out of teeth from an ex-boyfriend. What is that?

但是她有一條用前男友的牙齒做成的項鍊。到底在幹嘛？

Yes, thank you! It's like, Hello? He's been missing for six months. It's over! Stop acting like a crazy bitch!

對，謝謝！那種感覺就像是，哈囉？他已經失蹤六個月了。結束了好嗎！可以不要再表現得個像個瘋女人嗎？

對，謝謝。我知道！女生嘛，兄弟。

No, no, no. Your girlfriend's a legit crazy person.

不不不。你女朋友是個真正的瘋子。

Guess we're just a couple of dudes with crazy girlfriends. Am I right?

我們就是一群有瘋子女友的兄弟啊。對吧？

Dave, you need to break up with this girl.

Come on, don't do that. I didn't tell you you need to break up with your girlfriend.

拜託，別這樣。我可沒要你跟你女朋友分手啊。

Because she's not actually crazy! That's just something I say when she's mad at me.

因為她沒有真的發瘋啊！那只是她生我氣時，我會說的話。

Yeah, your girlfriend gets mad at you when you drink too much. Mine gets mad when she can’t see the moon.

對，你女朋友會在你喝太多的時候對你發脾氣。而我女朋友會在她看不到月亮的時候對我發脾氣。

No, she’s actually going to murder you. My girlfriend’s just gonna be mildly annoying.

不，她是真的會謀殺你。我女朋友就只有點煩而已。

對，因為她真他媽瘋了，兄弟。

She’s not crazy! I’m sorry I said that.

I’m not trying to relate to you right now. Listen carefully. Guys call their girlfriends crazy whenever they show emotion.

我現在不是在表示感同身受。仔細聽好。男生在他們的女友情緒不穩定時都會說她們瘋狂。

And that is wrong. I see that now because you’re dating an actual insane person, and I’m concerned for you.

而那是不對的。我現在明白了，因為你正在跟一個真的神經病交往，我很擔心你。

So, please, break up with your crazy girlfriend.

所以，拜託你，跟你的瘋子女友分手吧。

Yeah, you’re right. You’re right. I’ll do it. But only if you do it, too.

對，你是對的，你是對的。如果你也分的話，我就會分手。

She’s gonna make a necklace out of your teeth!

她以後會用你的牙齒做一條項鍊欸！

Oh, shit! she’s here! I guess I’m in the doghouse tonight, right? Bro?

喔，該死！她來了！我想我今晚慘了，對吧？兄弟？

Give me! It’s always with teeth with you!

Hey, Guys! It’s Murph from College Humor.

嘿，大家！我是「大學幽默」的Murph.

Click here to subscribe and here to watch more videos, and leave a comment.

按這裡訂閱，還有按這裡來觀看更多影片，別忘了留下評論喔。

I'll get you started. Um, am I the only one who didn't find this funny?

就會開始囉。呃，只有我覺得這個不好笑嗎？