Name: 史上最差的 50 個電視畫面項目 (Top 50 Worst AS SEEN ON TV Items Ever)
Uploaded: 2025-05-23T04:55:21.000Z
Duration: 37 min 17 s

Introducing the revolutionary sauna pants. The at-home sauna experience that you can enjoy when you want to and where you want to. Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for those as-seen-on-TV products that should never be seen in your house or on your credit card bill. ShakeWeight is the flab-busting breakthrough that trims your arms and shapes your shoulders at the same time. Number 50. GoGo Pillow. A pillow that can hold your tablet.

向您介紹革命性的三溫暖褲。您可以隨時隨地享受居家三溫暖體驗。歡迎來到《WatchMojo》，今天我們將為您盤點那些電視上從未出現過的產品，這些產品既不應該出現在您的家中，也不應該出現在您的信用卡賬單上。ShakeWeight 是一款能消除贅肉的突破性產品，它能同時修飾手臂和肩部線條。第 50 位GoGo 枕頭一個可以放平板電腦的枕頭。

程度副詞

Just what you always wanted, right? Maybe this was actually kinda useful before there were all those tablet cases with built-in stands. But even then, the reason for this thing seems odd. In the commercial, they show people using it on an exercise bike. Really? We get using it in bed, but at that point, can't we just lean it against one of our own pillows? The one good thing about this product is that it transforms into one of those travel neck pillows.

這不正是你一直想要的嗎？也許在出現內置支架的平板電腦保護套之前，這東西還真有點用。但即便如此，這個東西的理由似乎也很奇怪。在廣告中，他們展示了人們在健身自行車上使用它。真的嗎？我們可以在床上使用它，但我們就不能把它靠在自己的枕頭上嗎？這個產品的一個好處是，它可以變成那種旅行用的頸枕。

情態副詞

The GoGo Pillow accomplishes that for you. It's absolutely every single function you could possibly want from a travel pillow. But then you have to go and hold your tablet in your hands.

GoGo 枕頭就能滿足您的需求。它具備旅行枕頭所具備的一切功能。不過，你還得把平板電腦拿在手上。

Guess you have to buy two. Number 49. Miracle Socks. They may call them a miracle, but these are just graduated compression socks. Now, can compression socks be useful? Yes, so these can be as well. But they aren't using any kinda new technology that any regular pair of graduated compression socks don't already use. They also claim to be much more fashionable than medical socks. That's debatable. Basically, they just took a product that already existed and threw a fancy eye-catching name on them. That gives us an idea for an amazing new product. It's called a miracle fork, and if you buy one, you get a miracle t-shirt at half price. Number 48.

我猜你得買兩個49號奇蹟襪他們可能稱之為奇蹟，但這只是漸進式壓力襪。壓力襪有用嗎？是的，所以這些也有用。但它們並沒有使用任何一雙普通的漸進式壓力襪沒有使用過的新技術。它們還聲稱比醫用襪子更時尚。這一點有待商榷。從根本上說，他們只是把已經存在的產品改頭換面，換上了一個花哨醒目的名字。這讓我們想到了一種神奇的新產品。它叫 "奇蹟叉子"，如果你買了一個，就能以半價得到一件 "奇蹟T恤"。48號

Leg and Foot Warmers. When socks and slippers just won't do, leg and foot warmers save the day.

腿部和足部保暖套當襪子和拖鞋無法取暖時，腿部和腳部保暖套就能拯救世界。

Some people have called them an ugly version of Uggs, but to us, they are like a Snuggie for your feet and lower legs. These fleece, boot-like things wrap around your lower leg and feet and do the job of a nice big warm sock, but with the added bonus of making you look ridiculous. Not to mention the opening at the toe. We guess that's why they aren't called leg and foot and toe warmers.

有些人稱它們為醜陋版的 Uggs，但對我們來說，它們就像是腳和小腿上的 Snuggie。這些羊毛、靴子一樣的東西包裹著你的小腿和腳，就像一雙溫暖的大襪子，但還能讓你看起來滑稽可笑。更不用說腳趾處的開口了。我們猜這就是為什麼它們不叫腿腳和腳趾保暖套的原因。

They also make the claim that the product helps promote circulation, but we doubt it. And we already have the miracle socks for that anyway. Number 47. My Secret Hair Enhancer. It's been decades and we still don't know what secret Victoria is keeping from us, but it took us all of five seconds to crack the code of my secret hair enhancer. Spray paint. Okay, not literal spray paint, but a head-safe version of spray paint that is supposed to cover up any bald or balding areas among whatever hair you have left. According to the how-to videos we watched, there are also some fibers you have to shake onto your head as well. Also, don't plan on letting anyone get too close or touch your head if you want to keep your use of the My Secret Hair Enhancer a secret. Number 46. Lady Elegance Pee Easy. No, this isn't some kind of elegant PEZ dispenser, but rather a urine dispenser for women who are sick and tired of all that sitting and squatting and want to pee standing up. All they have to do is stick this funnel-like device in their pants, tube point it out, and let her whiz. The product description also hypes the fact that the product allows women to urinate while in the lying position as well. What? When is that ever necessary?

他們還聲稱該產品有助於促進血液循環，但我們對此表示懷疑。反正我們已經有了神奇襪子。47 號我的祕密增發劑幾十年過去了，我們仍然不知道維多利亞對我們隱瞞了什麼祕密，但我們只用了五秒鐘就破解了我的祕密增發劑的密碼。噴漆好吧，不是字面意義上的噴漆，而是一種頭部安全型噴漆，據說可以遮蓋任何禿頂或禿髮區域，不管你還有多少頭髮。根據我們觀看的操作視頻，你還需要在頭上搖晃一些纖維。另外，如果你想保守使用 My Secret 增發器的祕密，就不要讓任何人靠得太近或觸摸你的頭部。46 號優雅女士小便易。不，這不是什麼優雅的

And regardless of what position they use it in, they still have to put this urine-covered device away afterwards. We hope not in their purse. Number 45. Chillo. We understand that pillows get warm and that a cooler pillow is more comfortable, which is why we've been known to flip our pillow over at least once throughout the night. But what if you had a cold, vinyl-covered mat filled with water to put on top of your pillow instead? Well, you're in luck. Say hi to Chillo. Now, instead of a comfortable pillow you probably spent quite a bit of money on, you can rest your head on a rather uncomfortable mat. And you get the added bonus of the valve possibly popping and waking up in a pool of water. Number 44. Tater Mitts. Big dishwashing gloves with a hard, rough palm. Tater mitts look more like some kind of torture device than a kitchen accessory. Which we guess makes sense since they're designed to rip the skin off a potato in eight seconds. What they do not mention in the commercial is that you first have to boil the potatoes for five minutes before running them under cold water while rubbing them vigorously between the gloves to peel them. Forget to boil them and these things are more than useless. So, really, you're looking at five minutes and eight seconds, at least. We'll stick with the good old potato peeler, thank you very much. Number 43. Hot Hues Hair Chalk. You know when you were a kid in school and you got chalk on your hands from writing on the blackboard and then you touched your head and some of that chalk color got in your hair? Producing Hot Hues Hair Chalk, the eye-popping color that glides on for instant glamorous fun, then shampoos out when you're done.

而且，無論他們以何種姿勢使用，事後都必須把這個沾滿尿液的裝置收起來。我們希望不要放在錢包裡。45號奇洛我們知道枕頭會變熱，涼一點的枕頭會更舒服，這也是我們整晚至少翻轉枕頭一次的原因。但是，如果你有一個冰涼的、乙烯基覆蓋的墊子，裡面裝滿水，放在枕頭上面會怎麼樣呢？那你就走運了。跟奇洛打個招呼吧。現在，你可以把頭放在一個相當不舒服的墊子上，而不是一個你可能花了不少錢買的舒適枕頭上。而且，你還能得到額外的好處，那就是氣閥可能會爆裂，醒來時就會在一灘水裡了。第 44 個洗碗手套大號洗碗手套，手掌又硬又粗糙。與其說

Well, someone turned that into a business and called it Hot Hues. Pull your hair through the hair chalk applicator and voila, you have some chalk-colored strands. Except your head isn't a chalkboard. Also, it washes right out in the shower. So, if you like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain, you might want to skip the rain part. With Hot Hues, it's easy, fun to change and choose and it all washes out with shampoo. Number 42. For Real Portable Sauna. Can and should are two very different things. You know, just because you can make something portable doesn't mean you should make it portable. A phone? Yes, we're totally on board. But we're thinking a sauna is something that doesn't really need the portable treatment. Maybe it's just because you'll look ridiculous in it. Because you will. Like some kind of upright silver turtle with your head and hands sticking out. But it will definitely heat you up like a sauna. And hey, there's also a cup holder.

現在，有人把它變成了一門生意，取名為 "Hot Hues"。把頭髮穿過頭髮粉筆塗抹器，瞧，你就有了幾縷粉筆色的頭髮。只不過你的頭不是黑板。此外，它還可以在淋浴時直接洗掉。所以，如果你喜歡皮娜可樂雞尾酒和淋雨，你可能想跳過淋雨這部分。有了 Hot Hues，更換和選擇都很簡單、有趣，而且用洗髮水就能洗掉。42 號真正的便攜式三溫暖。可以和應該是兩碼事。要知道，你能讓某樣東西便攜，並不意味著你應該讓它便攜。手機？是的，我們完全同意。但我們認為三溫暖這種東西並不需要便攜式處理。也許只是因為你穿著它看起來會很滑稽

So, that's pretty cool. Number 41. Rapid Ramen Cooker. If you make a big bowl of ramen and your first thought is, man, if only this instant food took a fraction of the time to cook, then boy, do we have the pointless product for you. Instead of simply placing the freeze-dried noodles into a pot, the Rapid Ramen Cooker promises that their ingenious plastic dish will cut your precious ramen cooking time in half. Well, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to realize that the microwave might be your fastest heating option. But how's this cookware any better than your run-of-the-mill bowl? It, um, has handles, of course. Next, they'll try to sell us a spoon and call it the speedy scooping device. Number 40. Titty Bear. Right at the top of the Titty

所以，這很酷。41號快速拉麵鍋如果你做了一大碗拉麵，第一個念頭就是：天哪，要是這種速食只需要一小部分時間就能煮熟就好了，那麼好傢伙，我們為你準備了一款毫無意義的產品。Rapid Ramen Cooker 並不是簡單地把凍乾麵放進鍋裡，而是承諾他們獨創的塑膠盤子能把你寶貴的拉麵烹飪時間縮短一半。不用說你也知道，微波爐可能是最快的加熱方式。但這種炊具比普通的碗好在哪裡呢？當然，它有把手。接下來，他們會試著賣給我們一個勺子，並稱其為快速舀水器。40號提提熊就在 "奶頭熊 "的頂端

Bear website, it asks, does the shoulder strap of your car seat belt cause discomfort on your shoulder? We think the better question should be, does having a little teddy bear smooshed face first right up into your chest in a frankly suggestive manner cause you discomfort? The fact that they even call this thing Titty Bear as a not-so-subtle ode to the location it will sit on a woman's chest is hilariously creepy. The Titty Bear stays where you want it, until you move it, and it's easy to slide out of the way when not in use. Listen to the voiceover guy say the name. You'll swear he pronounced the double D as double T. Number 39. Neck Magic Air Cushion.

小熊網站問：汽車安全帶的肩帶是否會讓您的肩膀感到不適？我們認為，更好的問題應該是，讓一隻小泰迪熊以坦率的暗示方式，臉朝上緊貼著你的胸膛，會不會讓你感到不適？事實上，他們甚至把這個東西叫做 "Titty Bear"，這是對它在女性胸前位置的一種不那麼含蓄的讚美，令人毛骨悚然。Titty Bear 可以固定在你想要的位置，直到你移動它，而且不用的時候很容易滑開。聽配音員說這個名字。你會發誓他把雙 D 發成了雙 T。頸部魔術氣墊

Nothing about the Neck Massage Air Cushion seems right. When it's fully blown up, it actually kind of looks like a torture device. From the super uncomfortable look of the woman using the product on the box to the fact that you are literally putting something around your neck and then purposely making it tighter and tighter. Why do so many of these products sound like they could be used as torture devices if they landed in the wrong hands? Although, in the case of the Neck

頸部按摩氣墊似乎沒有什麼是對的。當它完全打開時，實際上有點像一個折磨人的裝置。從包裝盒上使用該產品的女士超級不舒服的樣子，到你真的要把什麼東西套在脖子上，然後故意把它越套越緊的事實。為什麼這麼多的產品聽起來都像是如果落入壞人之手就會被用作刑具呢？不過，就 Neck

Magic Air Cushion, it is in your hands, so you really have no one to blame but yourself.

Magic Air Cushion，它就在你的手中，所以你真的只能怪自己。

Number 38. Potty Patch. We're not trying to take sides in the very contentious which-are-better cats-or-dogs debate. But, when it comes to making a pros and cons list, isn't one of the items on the dogs' pro list the fact that they don't go to the bathroom in the house? No litter boxes, no constant stink in the air. With the Potty Patch, you can turn your outdoor pooper into an inside one with a square of artificial grass. Now, maybe if we could use it to practice our putting. Number 37. City Kitty. From dogs pooping on a patch of fake grass to cats using the toilet. Yes, we're talking about City Kitty, the toilet training kit for your kitty cat. And yes, we get it. A cat that can use the toilet sounds like a dream come true. But is it really? Health officials warn us never flush our cat's litter down the toilet. And it isn't just because of the litter clogging the pipes. It's because the toxins in cat waste can be harmful to some humans. And no one wants that getting into the water supply.

第 38 號便便補丁我們並不想在貓狗孰優孰劣的爭論中偏袒任何一方。但是，說到優缺點，狗的優缺點之一不就是不用在家裡上廁所嗎？沒有垃圾箱，空氣中沒有持續的臭味。有了 Potty Patch，您就可以用一塊方形的人造草把您的戶外便便變成室內便便。現在，也許我們可以用它來練習推杆。第 37 位城市小貓從狗在假草地上拉屎到貓上廁所。沒錯，我們說的就是 City Kitty，貓咪如廁訓練套裝。是的，我們明白。一隻會用廁所的貓聽起來就像夢想成真。但真的如此嗎？衛生官員警告我們，千萬不要把貓砂衝進馬桶。這不僅僅是因為貓

There's also the issue that cats who use the toilet aren't burying their feces, which is a natural instinct of the animal. Sorry cats, back to the litter boxes.

還有一個問題是，上廁所的貓不會把糞便埋起來，這是動物的本能。對不起，貓咪們，回到貓砂盆裡去吧。

Number 36. Roll-Up Electronic Piano. Unrolling an electronic piano might sound really good. But you know what doesn't sound really good? A roll-up electronic piano. Unrolling an electronic piano might sound easy. But you know what isn't easy? Properly playing a roll-up electronic piano.

第 36 號捲起式電子鋼琴展開電子鋼琴可能聽起來很不錯。但你知道什麼聽起來不好嗎？卷軸式電子鋼琴。展開一架電子鋼琴可能聽起來很容易。但你知道什麼不容易嗎？正確彈奏卷軸式電子鋼琴。

To be fair, there is a wide range of roll-up pianos out there, from really cheap kiddo ones to ones supposedly designed for actual musicians. But for a little bit more money, you know what you can get? An actual electronic keyboard. Sure, you can't roll it up, but those are the sacrifices we all must make. Number 35. Bulbrite. There are plenty of toilet lights out there. But what makes

公平地說，市場上有各種各樣的捲簾鋼琴，從非常便宜的兒童鋼琴到據說是為真正的音樂家設計的鋼琴。但是，只要多花一點錢，你知道能買到什麼嗎？真正的電子琴。當然，你不能把它捲起來，但這是我們必須做出的犧牲。第 35 號燈泡現在有很多廁所燈。但是，是什麼讓

Bulbrite so special is the device's detection system that can tell whether the toilet seat is up or down, and indicate this via glowing red or green when you walk into the bathroom.

Bulbrite 的特別之處在於設備的檢測系統，它能分辨出馬桶蓋是向上還是向下，並在你走進浴室時通過紅光或綠光顯示出來。

Now every time when he leaves the seat up, I'll know. Red tells me the lid is up, green tells me it's down, it's safe to sit. If this product were ever to catch on, it'd derail the careers of many aspiring stand-up comics whose whole routine is centered around a 10-minute bit about how men always leave the toilet seat up. What someone really needs to invent is a device that senses when you're about to purchase a ridiculous product like this and turns on a red light telling you to stop. Number 34. Head wedgie. Head wedgie? Really? They couldn't think of anything better to call it? This is basically a larger neck pillow that instead of fitting around your neck, fits over the headrest of your seat, allowing you to rest your head without flipping from side to side. If we're being honest, this one actually looks kinda useful.

現在，每次他把座位豎起來時，我都會知道。紅色告訴我座位蓋子是向上的，綠色告訴我座位蓋子是向下的，這樣坐著就安全了。如果這種產品流行起來，許多有抱負的脫口秀喜劇演員的職業生涯都會是以而毀於一旦，因為他們的整套表演都是圍繞著一個 10 分鐘的小段子展開的：男人總是把馬桶蓋掀起來。真正需要發明的是一種設備，當你準備購買這種荒謬的產品時，它就會感應到，然後亮起紅燈，告訴你停止購買。第 34 個。頭部溼疹頭頂溼巾？真的嗎？他們就想不出更好的名字嗎？這基本上是一個更大的頸枕，它不是套在脖子上，而是套在座椅的頭枕上，讓

It's a little bulky so you aren't bringing it on a plane, but for the car or maybe even a chair at home, we can see it coming in kinda handy. But again, head wedgie, we're not sure we can get past that. Number 33. Wax vac. We were always told that sticking Q-tips on our ears could be very dangerous, but no one ever told us not to stick a vacuum in there. Still, does that mean it's safe to do it or just that no one ever figured people would even consider sucking wax out of their ears with a vacuum device? Well, if it was the latter, they were dead wrong. Say hello to the wax vac ear cleaner. While you can say hello to it, we don't care if they advertise it as using gentle suction. We are only saying goodbye to this crazy thing. Number 32. Fanny bank. The fanny bank is a piggy bank in the shape of a bum sticking out of a pair of pants with the crack for the coins in, where else, the crack of the plastic butt. Insert a coin and hear the fanny fart. This one is pretty simple. The point at which this product goes from awesome as seen on

它有點笨重，所以不能帶上飛機，但在車上，甚至在家裡的椅子上，我們都能看到它的身影。但同樣的，頭頂上的楔形物，我們不確定能不能通過。第 33 項蠟吸塵器我們總是被告知把 Q 型吸管粘在耳朵上會非常危險，但從來沒有人告訴我們不要把吸塵器粘在耳朵上。不過，這是否意味著這樣做是安全的，還是說從來沒有人認為人們會考慮用真空吸塵器把耳朵裡的蠟吸出來？如果是後者，那他們就大錯特錯了。向耳垢真空吸塵器問好。雖然你可以向它問好，但我們不在乎他們是否宣傳說它使用的是溫和的吸力。我們只想和這個瘋狂的東西說再見。第 32 個。腰

TV item to awful as seen on TV item is the point at which you no longer find farts to be hilarious.

從 "電視項目 "到 "電視上看到的可怕項目"，就是你不再覺得放屁是件搞笑的事。

Because the hilarity of the fart sound is what this product relies on 100%. Number 31. Fridge locker. What are you to do when people at work are always stealing your lunch? Simply put your food or drinks into the fridge locker, set the lock to your secret combination, and now your food is secure wherever you take it. Well, you could talk to them like adults and politely ask that whoever is doing it please stop. Or you can put your lunch in the fridge locked in a silly plastic cage. But wait, couldn't they just take the whole cage? Well, yes they could. But according to the commercial, doing so would be fruitless because even an 800-pound grizzly bear can't break the fridge locker. Even he's having a hard time getting into the fridge locker. We guess you better not forget the combination then. Number 30. Pajama jeans.

因為放屁聲的熱鬧程度是這款產品的 100%依賴。31號冰箱儲物櫃當公司裡的人總是偷吃你的午餐時，你該怎麼辦？只需把食物或飲料放進冰箱儲物櫃，把鎖設置成你的祕密密碼，現在無論你把食物帶到哪裡都安全了。好吧，你可以像成年人一樣和他們談談，禮貌地要求他們停止偷竊。或者你也可以把午餐放在冰箱裡，鎖在一個愚蠢的塑膠籠子裡。但是等等，他們就不能把整個籠子都拿走嗎？當然可以。但根據廣告的說法，這樣做是沒有結果的，因為即使是一隻 800 磅的灰熊也無法打破冰箱的櫃子。連它自己都很難進入冰箱儲物櫃。我們猜你最好別忘了密碼。

Pajamas are super comfortable, but you can't wear them in public. Jeans look good in public, but they aren't that comfy. Allow us to introduce you to the Reese's of clothing, pajama jeans.

睡衣超級舒服，但不能在公共場合穿。牛仔褲在公共場合看起來不錯，但並不那麼舒適。請允許我們向您介紹服裝界的 "里斯"--睡衣牛仔褲。

With pajama jeans, the hot new fashion sensation that fits every figure perfectly. Just like the aforementioned candy brings together chocolate and peanut butter, pajama jeans bring you all the comfort of pajama bottoms with the stylish look of jeans. Or at least that's what the infomercial tells us. And for more weird wearables, get a load of the wearable towel.

睡衣牛仔褲是最適合各種身材的時尚新寵。就像前面提到的糖果把巧克力和花生醬結合在一起一樣，睡衣牛仔褲給你帶來睡衣褲的舒適和牛仔褲的時尚。至少廣告是這麼說的。如果想了解更多奇特的可穿戴設備，那就來看看可穿戴毛巾吧。

Because why just dry yourself off when you can wear your towel like some kind of terry cloth toga? Number 29. Easy butter. You know how annoying it is to open your butter dish, take some butter with a knife, and spread it on your toast? Yeah, neither do we. And yet, that's basically the problem Easy Butter decided to solve with this handheld dispenser.

因為當你可以把毛巾穿成某種毛圈布長袍時，為什麼只是把自己擦乾呢？29號簡易黃油你知道打開黃油盤，用小刀取一些黃油塗在吐司上有多煩人嗎？是的，我們也不知道。然而，這正是 Easy Butter 手持式黃油分配器要解決的問題。

However, it's not like the thing also spreads the butter for you. It just drops a pat of butter on your food and then you still have to do the rest. How much easier is that really?

不過，這東西並不像會幫你塗抹黃油。它只是在你的食物上滴上一小勺黃油，然後剩下的事情還得你來做。這到底有多簡單呢？

The fact that the product no longer exists seems to imply that it was easy for people to not buy it. Use the second cutter to cut just about anything from cheese to hot dogs to bananas to cucumbers. Number 28. Doc Bottoms A-Spray. With a name like Doc Bottoms and A-Spray, pronounced A-Spray but easily misread as A-Spray, you'd think this product would be ripe for a parody. And it would be if the product wasn't actually deodorant for your butt.

該產品已不復存在，這似乎意味著人們很容易不買它。用第二個切刀可以切奶酪、熱狗、香蕉、黃瓜等任何東西。28 號Doc Bottoms A-Spray有了 Doc Bottoms 和 A-Spray（發音為 A-Spray，但容易被誤讀為 A-Spray）這樣一個名字，你會覺得這個產品的模仿對象已經成熟了。如果該產品實際上不是屁股除臭劑的話，那就更合適了。

But it isn't just for your butt. It's also for your armpits, feet, and, we're not kidding, your privates. Anywhere that can get stinky, just spray the A-Spray and, as they say, it literally stops odors before they start. Given what they're selling, we appreciate that the infomercial doesn't take itself too seriously. But we can't take the product seriously either.

但它不僅適用於你的屁股。它也適用於你的腋窩、腳，還有你的私處。只要噴上 A 噴霧劑，任何地方都會臭氣熏天，就像他們說的那樣，它能在異味產生之前就將其消滅。考慮到他們的賣點，我們很欣賞這則資訊廣告沒有把自己太當回事。但我們也不能把產品當真。

Number 27. Brush Buddy's Singing Toothbrush. Want to listen to One Direction or Justin Bieber while you brush your teeth? Just take out your phone, go to your Spotify account and play the song. What you don't need to do is buy a Brush Buddy's Singing Toothbrush. However, if it really does make your toothbrushing experience as amazing as it does for the girl in the infomercial, then we take it all back. While we're on this dental care kick, if squeezing toothpaste onto your toothbrush is as harrowing an experience as it is in the pressed-to-paste commercial, we guess the product would have value. Otherwise, allow us to ask, why? Number 26. Talking TP. The name of this one is a little misleading. This isn't talking toilet paper because that would be dumb, right? No, this is the toilet paper roll that talks. Yes, it's a real thing. Just record a message on the roll and whenever the toilet paper gets pulled, the message will play. Prank your friend or, as the example on the packaging suggests, ask your girlfriend to marry you. We're not here to hand out relationship advice, but don't ask your girlfriend to marry you via a talking toilet paper roll. The best thing the roll could say would be to admonish you for having bought the stupid thing in the first place.

第 27 號Brush Buddy 會唱歌的牙刷。想在刷牙時聽 One Direction 或 Justin Bieber 的歌嗎？只需拿出手機，進入 Spotify 賬戶，播放歌曲即可。你不需要購買 "刷牙哥 "會唱歌的牙刷。不過，如果它真的能讓你的刷牙體驗像廣告中的女孩一樣神奇，那我們就收回所有的話。既然我們都在關注牙齒護理，如果把牙膏擠到牙刷上的過程就像廣告中的 "按壓牙膏 "那樣令人痛苦，我們認為這款產品還是有價值的。否則，請允許我們問一句：為什麼？第 26 項。會說話的 TP。這個名字有點誤導人

Number 25. Air Curler. We all know how labor-intensive and time-consuming curling your hair is. Well, not anymore if the air curler is to be believed.

第 25 號空氣捲髮器我們都知道捲髮是一件多麼費力費時的事情。不過，如果有了空氣捲髮器，那就不一樣了。

Just stick the big bucket thing to the end of your hair dryer, put a chunk of your hair in said bucket, and let her rip. According to the product description, what you should end up with are soft, tangle-free, long-lasting curls. However, that doesn't always seem to be the case in real life. What many women get is kinda wavy hair or maybe scraggly curls. And be careful, it gets really hot. Number 24. Dump Dinners. As Timon said in The Lion King, what's in a name?

只需把這個大水桶插在吹風機的末端，把一大把頭髮放進水桶裡，然後就可以開始吹了。根據產品描述，你最終得到的應該是柔軟、不打結、持久的捲髮。然而，現實生活中似乎並非總是如此。很多女性得到的是有點波浪的頭髮，或者是亂糟糟的捲髮。而且要小心，它真的很燙。第 24 種。垃圾晚餐。就像《獅子王》裡丁滿說的，名字有什麼用？

Well, in this case, everything. There's nothing wrong with the product itself.

好吧，在這種情況下，一切都有問題。產品本身沒有問題。

It's a cookbook filled with easy and nutritious recipes you can make in under 15 minutes. Who doesn't like that? But, ugh, that name. Yes, we get it. They call them dump dinners because you just dump in all the ingredients and bake. But come on, they couldn't come up with a name for the recipes that didn't also bring to mind where the meals would end up after passing through our intestinal tract? Do they not own a thesaurus? There's gotta be at least one or two better words.

這是一本烹飪書，裡面有很多簡單又有營養的食譜，你可以在 15 分鐘內完成。誰不喜歡呢？但是，唉，這名字。是的，我們知道了。他們稱其為 "垃圾晚餐"，因為你只需倒入所有配料，然後烘烤即可。但拜託，他們就不能給食譜起個名字，讓人聯想到飯菜經過腸道後的下場嗎？難道他們沒有詞庫嗎？至少還有一兩個更好的詞吧。

And speaking of number two, sorry, we couldn't help it. Number 23. Booty Pop. While it sounds like an NSYNC parody song, booty pop is actually underwear with padding. Say bye-bye-bye to your flat rear and say hello to your brag-worthy bubble butt in seconds with these transformational panties. Looks like we found out where all the shoulder pads went when they went out of style and jackets at the end of the 80s. The problem is that while it does seem to work with certain outfits and certain types of clothing, other times you can see the outline of the padding through the clothes. And at least according to a few real people who've tried it, it isn't very comfortable either. I feel like especially when I'm wearing it doesn't look very natural.

說到二號，對不起，我們忍不住了。23號Booty Pop。雖然聽起來像一首 NSYNC 的模仿歌曲，但 Booty Pop 其實是一種帶襯墊的內衣。有了這款神奇的內褲，你就可以在幾秒鐘內和扁平的臀部說 "拜拜"，和值得炫耀的泡泡臀說 "你好"。看來我們找到了 80 年代末墊肩和夾克過時的原因。問題是，雖然它似乎能與某些服裝和某些類型的衣服搭配，但其他時候你可以透過衣服看到墊肩的輪廓。而且至少據一些試用過的人說，它也不是很舒服。我覺得特別是當我戴著它的時候，看起來不是很自然。

Number 22. The Broccoli Wad. Wise guys don't carry their money in a wallet. He carries around in a wad like this. We're all familiar with how mafia men use rubber bands from broccoli bunches to hold their money instead of wallets, right? Well, how would you like to pay for a manufactured version of those bands to hold your money instead of getting one for free off of an actual wad of broccoli? Yeah, we wouldn't either. But that didn't stop Johnny Gennaro from creating the Broccoli Wad money band and pitching it on Shark Tank back in season two.

第 22 號西蘭花錢包聰明人不會把錢放在錢包裡。他把錢裝在這樣的包裡。我們都知道黑手黨的人用西蘭花束上的橡皮筋代替錢包來裝錢，對吧？那麼，你願意花錢買一個人造的橡皮筋來裝錢，而不是從一束真正的西蘭花上免費得到一個嗎？是的，我們也不想。但這並沒有阻止約翰尼-吉納羅創造出 "西蘭花捲錢帶"，並在第二季的 "鯊魚坦克 "節目中進行了推介。

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Broccoli Wad. While he did make a deal on the show, it never actually materialized. And within a year or so, the Broccoli Wad was swimming with the fishes. That's four Broccoli Wads today for only $10.

女士們，先生們，這就是 "西蘭花瓦德"。雖然他確實在節目中談成了一筆交易，但實際上並沒有實現。在一年左右的時間裡，"西蘭花捲 "就和魚兒一起游來游去了。今天四塊西蘭花餅只要10美元

Number 21. The Tush Turner. As seen on TV, items seem to spend a lot of time focused on people's rear ends, from making them look better to helping them smell better.

第 21 號翹臀專家正如在電視上看到的那樣，這些項目似乎花了很多時間專注於人們的臀部，從讓她們看起來更美到幫助她們聞起來更香。

But with the Tush Turner, now your butt can turn better?

但是，有了 "轉屁股器"，你的屁股就能轉得更好了嗎？

Introducing the Tush Turner, the perfectly engineered seat cushion that makes getting in and out of any car easy and pain-free. Yeah, like you know how awful it is getting in and out of a car? Well, stop turning your body to get in and out all by yourself and start letting the seat cushion help out a little. You can take it anywhere you go, making every chair an easy chair. The Tush Turner is a seat cushion that rotates to supposedly make it easier and less strenuous on your body to enter and exit a vehicle. Honestly, we'd like to tell the people who invented this ridiculous thing to do a different kind of sitting and rotating. The Tush Turner greatly reduces the stress.

Tush Turner 是一款設計完美的座墊，它能讓你輕鬆無痛地進出任何汽車。你知道上下車有多難嗎？好了，別再自己轉著身體上下車了，讓坐墊幫你一把吧。你可以把它帶到任何地方，讓每把椅子都變成輕鬆椅。Tush Turner 是一種可以旋轉的座墊，據說可以讓你的身體更輕鬆、更省力地進出車輛。老實說，我們想告訴發明這種可笑東西的人，換一種坐姿和旋轉方式吧。Tush Turner 可以大大減輕壓力。

The Tush Turner does the swiveling for you. Number 20. Poo Trap.

Tush Turner 可以幫你完成旋轉。第20個便便陷阱

Introducing Poo Trap, an amazing new innovation that eliminates the need of picking up after your dog. Though dog waste might seem like little more than an inconvenience, it can contain bacteria and parasites, which if exposed to the eyes can result in blindness.

向您介紹 Poo Trap，這是一項令人驚歎的創新技術，讓您不再需要為愛犬清理糞便。雖然狗狗的糞便看似只是一種不便，但其中可能含有細菌和寄生蟲，如果接觸到眼睛，可能會導致失明。

Meaning that when you don't pick up after your dog, you expose others to more than just some poop on their shoes. It's easy to install on your dog and makes your walking experience fun.

這意味著，如果您不為愛犬拾便，您暴露給他人的就不僅僅是鞋子上的糞便了。它很容易安裝在狗狗身上，讓您的遛狗體驗充滿樂趣。

Poo Trap is a product with good intentions, but an incredibly bizarre execution. It's a brightly colored harness you strap onto your dog's rear with a tiny bag attached, so that when they squat to do their business, the poo will, in theory, go straight into the bag without you having to actually pick it up. Nice and simple. But unfortunately, it's simply too odd for most people, and probably dogs as well. Number 19. Potty Putter.

便便捕捉器 "的設計初衷是好的，但執行起來卻令人難以置信。它是一個色彩鮮豔的揹帶，你可以把它綁在狗狗的後背上，上面掛著一個小袋子，這樣當狗狗蹲下便便時，理論上便便就會直接進入袋子裡，而不用你去撿。簡單又實用。但不幸的是，這對大多數人來說都太奇怪了，對狗來說可能也是如此。第 19 個。便便推杆

If you think talking toilet paper would be a ridiculous addition to your bathroom, wait till you hear about buying your very own miniature golf set to put on the floor in front of you. This is advertised as a way to help you practice your putting, and uses the same fake green as real golf courses do. Though on a real golf course, you probably won't be trying to use the bathroom at the same time. Unfortunately, the potty putter raises more problems than it solves. Mainly the question of whether you set it up permanently, or do you only take it out whenever you need to go.

如果你認為會說話的廁紙會給你的浴室增添一個可笑的裝飾，那你就等著聽別人說要買一套自己的迷你高爾夫球具放在你面前的地板上吧。據宣傳，這套裝置可以幫助你練習推杆，它使用的假果嶺與真正的高爾夫球場相同。雖然在真正的高爾夫球場上，你可能不會同時想上廁所。遺憾的是，便盆推杆帶來的問題比它能解決的要多。主要的問題是，你是永久性地安裝它，還是隻在需要上廁所時才把它拿出來。

Potty putter is the perfect gift for the man on the go. He'll relax and think of you every time he practices putting. Number 18. Skinny's Instant Arm Lift. In what is perhaps the most insulting item on this list, the instant arm lift is used to get rid of unwanted flab by literally taping the flab to the back of your arm. It's advertised as a way to help you practice your putting, it's advertised to make, quote, sagging arms appear tight and firm, and we couldn't think of a more degrading and useless product. The tape is also extremely hard to apply, and is quite painful to take off apparently, like slowly peeling off a band-aid. Agonizing, undignified, and hopelessly impractical, this item ticks all the boxes of a dumb product.

Potty 推杆是送給外出男士的完美禮物。每次練習推杆時，他都會放鬆並想起你。第 18 件。Skinny 的即時手臂提升器。這可能是本榜單上最具侮辱性的產品了，"手臂瞬間提升 "是通過將贅肉粘貼在手臂後部來去除多餘贅肉的。它被宣傳為一種幫助你練習推杆的方法，它被宣傳為可以讓下垂的手臂看起來緊緻結實，我們想不出還有比這更有辱人格、更無用的產品了。這種膠帶也非常難貼，撕下來顯然相當痛苦，就像慢慢撕掉Ok繃一樣。痛苦、不體面、毫無希望的不實用，這款產品滿足了所有愚蠢產品的要求。

Number 17. GLH9. In case you wanted an alternative to our earlier My Secret Hair Enhancer product, there's this option. That's great-looking hair formula number nine, and it's hair in a can.

編號 17。GLH9。如果你想替代我們之前的 "我的祕密增發劑 "產品，還有這個選擇。這是九號美髮配方，是罐裝美髮。

Ron Popeil is the king of infomercials. If you were home sick in the 90s, you can bet your ass you were begging your parents for a food dehydrator or a pasta maker the minute they walked in the door. But the most ridiculous Ronco product was GLH9. Think the before and afters would be as effective in HD? Oh, I started using GLH about four months ago after my papa told me I'd never grow any more hair. Hey Emmett, look at me now, a full head of hair.

羅恩-波皮爾是資訊廣告之王。如果你在上世紀 90 年代生病在家，那麼你可以打賭，你的父母一進門，你就會求他們買一臺食物脫水機或麵條機。但最可笑的 Ronco 產品是 GLH9。你覺得高清電影裡的前後對比效果會一樣好嗎？哦，我是四個月前開始用 GLH 的，因為我爸爸說我再也長不出頭髮了。嘿，埃米特，看看我現在，滿頭秀髮。

Eating healthy is something we all want to do. But unhealthy food just tastes so good.

健康飲食是我們每個人都想做的事。但不健康的食物吃起來就是那麼美味。

Well, the fat magnet claims to be the perfect solution. You hover it over your food, and the excess fat on greasy foods gets sucked up by magnets or something like that.

脂肪磁鐵自稱是完美的解決方案。把它放在食物上，油膩食物上多餘的脂肪就會被磁鐵之類的東西吸走。

It smeared it onto the plate. It didn't suck it up like it's supposed to.

它把它抹到了盤子上。它沒有像它應該做的那樣吸起來。

Truth is, we don't really know how it works, mainly because it doesn't.

事實上，我們並不知道它是如何工作的，主要是因為它並不工作。

Seeing this product endorsed on the Dr. Oz show is just painfully awkward.

在《奧茲醫生》節目中看到這款產品的代言人實在是令人尷尬。

Gets rid of all of that grease. You all see that?

把油脂都去掉了你們都看到了嗎？

And it should be apparent to anyone watching that it is nothing but a cash grab.

任何人看了都會明白，這不過是在搶錢。

And I'm gonna get yours started right now. Oh, jeez Louise, what's happening?

我現在就去幫你開工天啊，露易絲，怎麼了？

If you're stuck in an office all day, finding the time to work out can be a struggle.

如果您整天呆在辦公室裡，要抽出時間鍛鍊身體可能會很困難。

The Hawaii chair, also known as the hula chair, is intended to kill two birds with one stone.

夏威夷椅又稱草裙舞椅，旨在一石二鳥。

With the appearance of a regular desk chair, this invention possesses a rotating seat that mimics a hula dance.

這款發明的外觀與普通辦公椅無異，但它的旋轉座椅可以模仿草裙舞。

This is truly the machine that takes the work out of your workout.

這才是真正能讓你的鍛鍊不再辛苦的機器。

Users can exercise their whole body without even standing up.

用戶甚至不用站立就能進行全身運動。

At least that's what the infomercial implies.

As far as fitness equipment goes, the Hawaii chair is hardly a substitute for the treadmill or elliptical.

就健身器材而言，夏威夷椅很難取代跑步機或橢圓機。

On top of that, it's too rambunctious to function in a quiet workplace environment.

此外，它還太暴躁，無法在安靜的工作環境中發揮作用。

Imagine answering the phone or using the computer while riding a tilt-a-whirl.

想象一下，一邊接聽電話或使用電腦，一邊坐著傾斜式旋轉木馬。

If you can sit, you can get fit. The Hawaii chair.

只要能坐，就能健身。夏威夷椅

This device looks more like it belongs in a dental clinic than as part of your daily beauty and fitness regime.

這個設備看起來更像是牙科診所的設備，而不是你日常美容和健身的工具。

Advertised as a product that gives you a natural facelift, the facial flex is almost as odd as the reactions of the woman trying it out in the infomercial.

該產品被宣傳為一種能讓你自然拉皮的產品，但其面部柔韌性幾乎和廣告片中試用該產品的婦女的反應一樣奇怪。

And yet, there are reportedly many people who swear by the facial flex's positive results.

然而，據說有很多人對這種面部柔性療法的積極效果信誓旦旦。

I say the apartment's not the only thing getting a facelift.

我說，不只是公寓要改頭換面。

A similar device is the neckline slimmer, a very unusual gadget promising to tighten your jawline, eliminate your double chin, and take years off your appearance by having you repeatedly push your head against it.

類似的設備還有纖頸器，這是一個非常特別的小工具，它能收緊下顎線，消除雙下巴，還能讓你反覆用頭頂住它，讓你的外表減齡。

They say beauty is pain, but this stuff looks like downright torture.

都說美麗就是痛苦，但這東西看起來簡直就是折磨。

Younger-looking skin is only one terrifying mask-wear away.

只需敷一次可怕的面膜，肌膚就會變得更年輕。

Just get into your silk pajamas, sit in your favorite fireside chair, and enjoy facial toning sessions that send impulses from a 9-volt battery directly into your 12 facial zones.

只需穿上絲綢睡衣，坐在最喜歡的爐邊椅子上，就能享受面部調理療程，9 伏電池會直接向面部 12 個區域發送脈衝信號。

And whatever you do, don't forget your lube.

Does this sound to anyone else like shock therapy?

還有人覺得這像是休克療法嗎？

Side effects may include redness, burning, memory loss, and violent horror film-inspired nightmares.

副作用可能包括髮紅、灼痛、記憶力減退和做恐怖片中的暴力噩夢。

The sooner you get started, the sooner you'll be enjoying results like the ones I've seen.

你越早開始，就能越早享受到我所看到的成果。

Introducing Cush, the comfortable nighttime companion.

向您介紹舒適的夜間伴侶 Cush。

The product is basically a piece of foam or plastic that goes in between a woman's breasts as she sleeps to support them during the night.

該產品基本上是一塊保麗龍或塑膠，在女性睡覺時放在乳房之間，以便在夜間支撐乳房。

It helps keep Cush in place even as you roll from side to side.

即使在您左右滾動時，它也能幫助保持 Cush 的位置。

It's impossible to look at this thing in action and not laugh in embarrassment at the sight of it, if that wasn't bad enough.

如果這還不夠糟糕的話，那就不可能在看到這東西的時候不尷尬地大笑。

A vast number of consumers complain that it doesn't stay in place due to the poor slippery quality of the material.

大量消費者抱怨說，由於材料的防滑性差，它無法固定到位。

Sorry C-Cuppers, but you'll have to find relief elsewhere.

對不起，C-Cuppers，你們得去其他地方找解脫了。

Introducing Zoomies, the compact, hands-free, high-power binoculars you wear like sunglasses.

Zoomies 是一款小巧、免提、大功率望遠鏡，可以像太陽鏡一樣佩戴。

If your goal is to look absolutely foolish while you're out in public, then Zoomies are for you.

如果你的目標是在公共場合看起來傻傻的，那麼 Zoomies 就是你的最佳選擇。

Zoomies are hands-free binoculars that sit on your head like a pair of glasses, so you can look at faraway objects without the annoying hassle of actually holding a pair of binoculars.

Zoomies 是一種免提式雙筒望遠鏡，可以像眼鏡一樣戴在頭上，這樣您就可以觀察遠處的物體，而不必再為實際拿著一副雙筒望遠鏡而煩惱。

Not only do you look ridiculous wearing them, but reviews also cite poor blurry vision and weak magnification as deal-breakers.

戴上它不僅看起來滑稽可笑，而且評論還指出，視力模糊和放大倍率弱也會讓人失望。

We can imagine that even avid birdwatchers passed on these, and we advise you to do the same.

我們可以想象，即使是狂熱的觀鳥者也會放棄這些，我們建議您也這樣做。

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