Name: Tiger Electronic Games - Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) (Tiger Electronic Games - Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN))
Uploaded: 2025-02-02T12:36:15.000Z
Duration: 18 min 40 s

程度副詞

He's gonna take you back to the past To play the shitty games you're stuck at He'd rather have a buffalo Take a diarrhea dump in his ear He'd rather eat the rotten asshole Of a roadkill drunk man down in Peteer He's the angriest gamer you've ever heard He's the Angry Nintendo Nerd He's the Angry Atari Sega Nerd He's the Angry Video Game Nerd Remember back when I first warned you about the horrors of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde on NES?

他寧願讓一頭水牛在他耳邊拉屎 他寧願吃一個醉漢的爛屁眼 他是你聽過最憤怒的遊戲玩家 他是憤怒的任天堂書呆子 他是憤怒的雅達利世嘉書呆子 他是憤怒的電子遊戲書呆子 還記得我第一次警告你 NES 上《傑基爾博士與海德先生》的恐怖嗎？Jekyll and Mr.

Well, there were a few other games I mentioned there.

They're just, you know, rare, obscure games like, you know, McKids or, uh, Taxman or whatever.

它們都是一些罕見的、不起眼的遊戲，比如《McKids》或者《Taxman》什麼的。

I didn't even know what the hell I was talking about.

What I meant to say was Wall Street Kid, a game about the stock market.

我想說的是《華爾街小子》，一款關於股市的遊戲。

Who would ever want to play a game like that?

But it just so happens, by some fucking coincidence, there actually is a game called Taxman for the Apple II computer.

但就是這麼巧，蘋果 II 電腦上真的有一款遊戲叫《稅人》（Taxman）。

I've heard that there's nothing much to this game, it's just a Pac-Man clone.

我聽說這款遊戲沒什麼可玩的，只是《吃豆人》的翻版。

I figure that probably means that it's a game that's very similar to Pac-Man.

我想，這可能意味著這是一款與《吃豆人》非常相似的遊戲。

他們所說的克隆，指的是完全複製。

Then you play Taxman without even knowing it.

然後，你就在不知不覺中扮演了 "稅務員"。

But that's not what I'm here to talk about.

I'm here to talk about something that I've feared since the beginning.

我來這裡是想談談我從一開始就擔心的事情。

Those little tiger, like, electronic wrist games?

那些小老虎，比如電子手腕遊戲？

Those are better than Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

比《傑基爾博士和海德先生》好看多了。

Is it time to scrape the bottom of the toilet bowl of the whole video game industry?

現在是時候對整個電子遊戲產業進行釜底抽薪了嗎？

Since the advent of video games, the idea of portable games was a novel concept, like the Nintendo Game & Watch series.

自視頻遊戲問世以來，便攜式遊戲一直是一個新穎的概念，比如任天堂的 Game & Watch 系列。

Everybody liked the idea of being able to bring a game with you wherever you go.

每個人都喜歡能隨身攜帶遊戲的想法。

There were many examples, but none so common as the tiger handheld games.

這樣的例子有很多，但沒有一個像老虎掌上游戲這樣常見。

They used the most primitive technology possible.

The graphics, if you can even call them graphics, work like this.

圖形（如果可以稱之為圖形的話）是這樣工作的。

The background is a fixed image that's printed onto the console.

背景是印在控制檯上的固定影像。

In front of that is a clear screen, kind of like an animation cell, with a bunch of static images that represent all the characters and objects.

前面是一個清晰的螢幕，有點像動畫單元，上面有一堆靜態影像，代表所有的角色和物體。

When the game plays, these images light up individually to simulate the illusion of movement.

遊戲開始時，這些影像會逐個亮起，以模擬運動的錯覺。

It's sort of like a calculator or a digital watch.

I can't think of a more crude way to make a video game.

我想不出比這更簡陋的視頻遊戲製作方式了。

Of course, you don't need technology to make a good game, but these were all ungodly.

當然，製作一款好的遊戲並不需要技術，但這些遊戲都是逆天的。

But that didn't stop these games from flooding the market.

但這並沒有阻止這些遊戲充斥市場。

They were everywhere, and everybody bought them!

Everybody I knew had at least one of these things.

我認識的每個人都至少有一個這樣的東西。

On the school bus, people were playing them.

在校車上，人們在玩這些遊戲。

At lunchtime, everybody was swapping them around and playing each other's games.

午餐時間，大家交換著玩對方的遊戲。

It was the cheapest option for a handheld game.

You could find them at any store, they were convenient for birthday presents, and each one was its own individual game.

在任何商店都能買到，作為生日禮物也很方便，而且每個遊戲都是獨立的。

You didn't need to get any other game cartridges to play on them.

你不需要購買其他遊戲盒式磁帶就能在上面玩遊戲。

The Game Boy, on the other hand, was more expensive, needed four AA batteries, and you'd still need to buy games for it.

而 Game Boy 則更加昂貴，需要四節 AA 電池，而且還需要購買遊戲。

For a lot of us, it was either this, or nothing.

對我們很多人來說，要麼這樣，要麼什麼都不做。

They had colorful artwork that looked way better than the shit that came on inside the screen.

它們有五顏六色的圖案，比螢幕內的垃圾好看多了。

It somehow gave you the impression that you were holding an arcade machine in your hands.

不知何故，它給人的感覺就像是手中拿著一臺街機。

The commercials made them look awesome, but really, they were garbage.

廣告讓它們看起來很棒，但實際上，它們就是垃圾。

These games were so mass-produced, it was like a swarm of mosquitoes sucking our blood!

這些遊戲如此批量生產，就像一群蚊子在吸我們的血！

The most shameless part of it is that these games tried to be more than what they were.

最無恥的是，這些遊戲試圖超越自己。

With this kind of technology, they could have stuck to solitaire or video poker, but no, they took it all the way and adapted action-adventure games.

有了這樣的技術，他們本可以繼續玩單人紙牌或電子撲克，但他們沒有，而是將其發揚光大，改編成了動作冒險遊戲。

They took Konami games, Capcom games, Sega games, like Altered Beast, Shinobi, and Sonic the Hedgehog.

他們還製作了科樂美遊戲、卡普空遊戲和世嘉遊戲，如 "改變的野獸"、"神兵 "和 "刺蝟索尼克"。

Any video game franchise ended up butchered on one of these things.

任何視頻遊戲特許經營權最終都會因為這些東西而毀於一旦。

Any licensed product, movies, TV shows, this Tiger got its claws on everything.

任何授權產品、電影、電視劇，這隻 "老虎 "的爪子都能抓到。

When you adapt a well-known game, everybody knows what the real game is supposed to be like.

當你改編一款知名遊戲時，每個人都知道真正的遊戲應該是什麼樣的。

But hey, the idea of playing Mega Man 2 on the go, why not?

不過，想在旅途中玩《洛克人 2》，何樂而不為呢？

Mega Man using a gun instead of his arm cannon?

Sure, I guess somebody just looked at the atrocious cover to the original Mega Man and thought, okay, he's got a gun, put it in the game.

當然，我猜是有人看了原版《洛克人》那糟糕的封面，然後想，好吧，他有槍，就把它放到遊戲裡吧。

Have you ever wanted to play a Mega Man game where you can run out of ammo?

你有沒有想過玩一款可以耗盡彈藥的《洛克人》遊戲？

First you have the arcade, then you have the home console versions, then you have the Game Boy version, and then at the very bottom you have the Tiger version.

首先是街機版，然後是家用遊戲機版，接著是 Game Boy 版，最後是 Tiger 版。

The only thing less than that would be using your imagination or playing the board game.

唯一比這差的就是發揮想象力或玩棋盤遊戲。

像《恐龍》這樣的電視節目怎麼樣？

You play as Michelle, I think, going around slapping high fives while fighting against inanimate objects.

我想，你扮演米歇爾，一邊與無生命的物體戰鬥，一邊四處擊掌。

Apparently everything in the Tanner household came alive and is trying to kill you.

顯然，坦納家的一切都活過來了，都想殺了你。

Personally, I prefer the Super Nintendo version of Full House Tournament Fighter.

就個人而言，我更喜歡超級任天堂版的《全職高手》。

For games that are so basic, you'd think they'd be easy to pick up and play.

對於如此基本的遊戲，你會認為它們很容易上手。

But many of them, I can't even figure out what you're supposed to do.

但很多時候，我甚至不知道你應該做什麼。

I just mash buttons and wait for something to happen.

我只需按下按鈕，等待事情發生。

A game this simple should not need an instruction manual.

這麼簡單的遊戲不需要說明書。

Some of them, I wonder if they're defective.

其中一些，我懷疑它們是否有缺陷。

In the bowling game, I haven't even been able to hit one pin.

在保齡球比賽中，我甚至連一根針都沒打中。

The ball goes straight for the pins, then it disappears!

球直奔小齒釘而去，然後消失不見！

The controls, a lot of times, are counterintuitive.

很多時候，控制都是反直覺的。

Anybody who's played a video game knows that the D-pad controls your movement and the buttons perform actions.

玩過電子遊戲的人都知道，D-pad 控制你的移動，而按鈕則執行操作。

有了老虎遊戲，什麼都可以做。

In Castlevania II, the whip is up or down on the D-pad while the buttons on the right are jump up, jump right and the sword, which is actually a throwing dagger, by the way.

在《惡魔城 2》中，D 鍵盤上的鞭子是向上或向下，而右邊的按鈕則是向上跳、向右跳和劍，順便說一下，劍實際上是一把投擲匕首。

Chippendale's Rescue Rangers had jump and pick on the left and on the right, to move, it's just one big button that says forward.

奇彭代爾的《營救別動隊》左邊有跳和挑，右邊有移動，只有一個大按鈕，上面寫著前進。

Every one of these games had some kind of quirky control when they should have just emulated what's on an NES controller.

每款遊戲都有某種古怪的控制方式，而他們本應只是模擬 NES 手柄上的操作方式。

Half of these games, the controls barely work at all because they're so fragile and don't age well.

這些遊戲中，有一半的操控裝置幾乎無法正常工作，因為它們太脆弱了，而且不易老化。

字幕列表影片播放

Tiger Electronic Games - Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) (Tiger Electronic Games - Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN))

figure

desperate

common

coincidence