And I can't believe I'm a medium apron.

真不敢相信我的圍裙是中號的。

And I can't believe I'm working for a corporate coffee place.

真不敢相信，我竟然在一家咖啡館工作。

This might be the lowest point of my life and my mom once lost me in a craps game behind a casino.

這可能是我人生的最低谷，我媽媽曾經在賭場後面的骰子游戲中把我輸掉了。

Hi, we're here to be trained.

嗨，我們是來接受培訓的。

I know, that's unfortunate.

我知道，這很不幸。

My name's Devin.

我叫戴文

Well, that's unfortunate.

真不幸

Let's get this over with.

讓我們快點結束吧

I have a lot of other places I need to be.

我還有很多其他地方要去。

Like your mom's basement?

比如你媽媽的地下室？

Hey, you don't have to give me attitude.

嘿，你不必對我擺架子。

I don't have to, but it's my pleasure.

我沒必要這麼做，但這是我的榮幸。

Sorry, Devin, it's just that it's hard for her because your name is Devin.

對不起，戴文，只是因為你叫戴文，她很難接受。

So, what are you girls?

那麼，你們是什麼女孩？

Writers?

作家？

Folk duo?

民間二重奏？

Just bitches?

只是婊子？

Nailed it, loser.

說對了，失敗者。

Peace yourself.

讓自己平靜下來

We need this job for another hour and 50 minutes.

我們還需要一小時五十分鐘。

OK, but for real, how long do you gotta work here before the health insurance kicks in?

好吧，不過說真的，你要在這裡工作多久才能享受醫療保險？

And is there dental?

有牙醫嗎？

Because I got a dead tooth doing nothing for me.

因為我有一顆死牙，對我毫無用處。

Insurance kicks in after 30 days.

保險在 30 天后生效。

But it's a PPO, not an HMO.

但這是 PPO，不是 HMO。

Well, we just got an HMO at our other job.

我們剛在另一份工作中加入了 HMO。

He's a Charlotte.

他是夏洛特人

OK, here we go.

好了，我們開始吧。

Look, this is the machine we use for everything.

看，這就是我們用來做任何事情的機器。

It's incredibly easy to work, unless you're stupid.

它非常容易操作，除非你很笨。

In which case, tell me now.

如果是這樣，現在就告訴我。

Devin, we're not your mean stepdad.

戴文，我們不是你刻薄的繼父。

Just show us how to use the machine.

只需告訴我們如何使用機器。

Listen up.

聽好了

Unlatch the portafilter from the group head.

將濾網從機頭上鬆開。

Press here for an ounce of grams.

按此處可獲得一盎司克。

Tamp it in, pack it down, turn it on.

夯實、打包、開啟。

I didn't get that, did you?

我沒聽懂，你呢？

Honestly, all I heard was group head.

老實說，我其實時麼都沒聽到。

So you tamp, pack, turn the knob, wait three, blast for 30, then you pour the shot.

所以，你要夯實、打包、旋轉旋鈕、等待三分鐘、噴射 30 分鐘，然後倒出煙霧。

Place the steam wand halfway in the pitcher at a 45-degree angle until the milk is 103 degrees.

將蒸汽棒以 45 度角半放入盛奶器中，直到牛奶溫度達到 103 度。

So what you're saying is it's easier to make meth?

所以你的意思是，製造安非他命更容易？

Syrups, powders, whipped cream is right here.

糖漿、粉末、鮮奶油都在這裡。

You ever work with one of these?

你用過這種東西嗎？

I think I can handle it.

我想我能應付。

I went to Wharton.

我上的是沃頓商學院。

Well, I went to Harvard.

我上過哈佛

And I went to Juvie.

然後我進了少管所。

And we're all here wearing an apron.

我們都繫著圍裙。

A grande, double cap, non-fat.

大杯，雙層奶泡，脫脂。

Grande, double cap, non-fat.

大號，雙層奶泡，脫脂。

Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.

喵，喵，喵，喵，喵。

A venti, triple cap, no whip.

一杯超大杯咖啡，三層奶泡，不加鮮奶油。

Venti, triple cap, no whip.

超大杯咖啡，三層奶泡，不加鮮奶油。

Meow, meow, shabam, meow.

喵喵，喵喵，沙巴姆，喵喵。

Grande, double soy latte.

大杯，雙份豆奶拿鐵

Grande, double soy latte.

大杯，雙份豆奶拿鐵

Got it, Max?

明白了嗎，麥克斯？

Nope.

沒有。

Where's those drinks, Max?

麥克斯，咖啡呢？

Working on it, getting close.

正在努力，快好了。

And I finished all over myself.

然後我弄得全身都是。

That's so me.

真像我會做的事。

Come on, Max, it can't be that hard.

拜託，麥克斯，沒那麼難吧

You two, switch.

你們倆 換一下

I gotta put out more napkins.

我得多放點餐巾紙。

That women's breakup support group is here, and they tap us out.

那個失戀婦女互助小組來了，她們會把我們搞瘋。

You think they're crying now?

你覺得他們現在會哭嗎？

Just wait till we run out of cake pops.

先等我們用完蛋糕棒吧。

I'll have a tall cap, triple shot, half-calf.

我要一杯中杯卡布奇諾，三杯半濃縮咖啡因。

Small scrap, nipple slap, half-half.

小刮擦，拍打乳頭，一半一半。

That's not what I said.

我不是這麼說的。

Tall cap, triple shot, half-calf.

一杯中杯卡布奇諾，三杯半濃縮咖啡因。

Girl, you're good at this.

姑娘，你真行

You should work at Starbucks.

你應該去星巴克工作。

I am good.

我很好。

I think I'm getting the hang of this.

我想我已經掌握了竅門。

Now I just have to...

現在我只需要...

Oh, holy mother!

哦，聖母啊

Ouch!

哎喲

This thing hates women so much, we should call it Texas.

這東西恨女人，我們應該叫它 "德克薩斯"。

Or Ohio.

或者俄亥俄州。

Or, to be honest, most of America.

老實說，大部分美國人都是如此。

I'll have a tall drip, extra hot.

給我來杯中杯手沖，要特別熱的。

Uh, what's your name?

你叫什麼名字？

Greg, with three Gs.

Greg, with three Gs.

Yeah, you're gonna be this picture of a penis.

恩亨，我要把你的名字畫成陰莖。

That's rude.

太無禮了

Now it has a hat on it.

現在，它戴上了一頂帽子。

It's saying good day.

他還說今天是個好日子。

Do you want me to talk to your manager?

你想讓我和你的經理談談嗎？

Yeah, in about 20 minutes after she learns this machine.

可以啊，等她花20分鐘學會那個機器

Hi.

你好。

I'll take a non-fat venti drip for Vera, and a tall latte for Fran, and a gingerbread latte with 11 Splendas.

我要給薇拉一杯脫脂超大杯拿鐵，給弗蘭一杯中杯拿鐵，給 11 Splendas 一杯薑汁拿鐵。

Can you two explain what this is?

你們倆能解釋一下這是什麼嗎？

I'd say it's pretty obvious.

我覺得這很明顯。

That's a penis wearing a hat.

那是戴帽子的小雞雞

Why?

為什麼？

Because it's bald and a little insecure.

因為它是個禿頭，所以有點不自信。

Dudes, you're like fired.

夥計們，你們被炒魷魚了。

Come on, Devin.

來吧，戴文

We just need 20 more minutes to learn that machine.

我們還需要 20 分鐘來學習這臺機器。

Please?

求你了？

No.

不

Return your aprons and caps, and do not even think about putting sandwiches in your pockets.

把圍裙和帽子還回去，別想把三明治放進口袋裡。

What?

什麼？

A girl can't get a morning bun?

我就不能拿點肉桂麵包？

No.

不

And no.

不行。

And take this crappuccino you made with you.

把你做的這杯咖啡帶走。

Oh, yeah, that is not quite right.

哦，這個喝起來真的不太對。

And it hit my dead tooth.

它擊中了我的死牙。