My dog's missing, my husband's cheating, and to top it all off, now I'm getting buy me some iced tea and make me some pasta?

我的狗失蹤了，我的丈夫出軌了，更糟糕的是，現在還要給我買冰茶，給我做意大利麵？

That's not even detective work!

這連偵探工作都算不上！

I want to work on something big!

我想做一件大事！

The case of the century!

世紀之案

Something like the strange creature lurking around the coast, or that demon carrying a cursed object, or that weirdo walking around town with a huge sharp weapon!

比如潛伏在海岸附近的奇怪生物，或者攜帶詛咒物品的惡魔，或者拿著巨大利器在城裡走來走去的怪人！

The word's out on the street, so why is no one hiring me?

街上都傳開了，為什麼沒人僱我？

I'd be perfect for the job!

我很適合這份工作

That's why I decided to take matters into my own hands.

是以，我決定親自動手。

I figure I'd crack the case and become a hero!

我想我會破案，成為英雄！

No way.

不可能

But when I dug deeper, I quickly found out that the rumors were only half the story.

但當我深入調查後，很快發現傳言只是故事的一半。

My investigation concluded that they're actually pretty nice people!

我的調查結論是，他們其實是很好的人！

And also that this is a damn good burger!

還有，這漢堡真他媽好吃！

They're all out there bringing smiles to people.

他們都在為人們帶來微笑。

Can I say the same about myself?

我能這樣說自己嗎？

Time to do something about that!

是時候做點什麼了！

After that, whether it was missing dogs or cheating husbands, no case was too small.

此後，無論是失蹤的狗還是出軌的丈夫，案件無小事。

While I was at it, I also invented an automatic iced tea mixer, pasta maker, and tea brushing machine!

同時，我還發明瞭自動冰茶攪拌機、麵條機和刷茶機！

Soon, the whole town will be smiling!

很快，整個小鎮都會笑逐顏開！

Then, the whole country!

然後是全國！

Then, all of humanity!

然後是全人類！

Okay, maybe I won't go that far, but I can at least start with the people around me, like my clients.

好吧，也許我不會走那麼遠，但我至少可以從我身邊的人開始，比如我的客戶。

Of course, I've still got my eyes out for that case of the century.

當然，我還在留意那件世紀大案。

A detective's curiosity is never satisfied.

偵探的好奇心永遠不會滿足。