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Yeah, I'll be honest with you guys, I really don't care to know what the MrBeast controversy is about.
是啊,老實跟你們說,我真的不想知道 "野獸先生 "的爭議是怎麼回事。
I'm sure it's filled with sweet drama juices, and it is good to expose people who deserve it if they commit heinous acts upon humanity and the universe.
我相信它充滿了甜蜜的戲劇性,揭露那些對人類和宇宙犯下滔天罪行的人是件好事。
And Jimbo could be a Universe Buster Plus that can solo the One Piece first, I don't know.
而神保可能是宇宙剋星加持者,可以先獨佔 One Piece,我也不知道。
There's just way too much for me to unpack at this point.
我現在要整理的東西實在太多了。
But something I do find intriguing is the amount of videos made on the MrBeast situation.
不過,我覺得耐人尋味的是,有關 "野獸先生 "情況的視頻數量之多。
So, today I've decided to make a tier list for commentary channels, and I'll be ranking them based on how many videos they dedicated to the MrBeast drama, along with a point system.
是以,今天我決定為評論頻道製作一個層級列表,我將根據它們為《MrBeast》劇奉獻的視頻數量進行排名,並採用積分制。
But real quick, let's give a quick shout-out to Chico Mac.
不過,我們還是要向奇科-麥克致敬。
For the Slop Olympics, our point system is concrete and measures content slop with the utmost accuracy.
對於泔水奧運會,我們的積分系統是具體的,能最準確地測量泔水的含量。
One MrBeast video is worth 5 points.
一個 MrBeast 視頻可得 5 分。
One little miscellaneous side quest, such as Chris Ava Tyson or Jake the Viking videos, are worth 3 points.
一個雜項小任務,如克里斯-艾娃-泰森或維京人傑克的視頻,價值 3 分。
If any MrBeast video goes over 15 minutes, I'll add an extra 2 points.
如果任何一段 MrBeast 視頻超過 15 分鐘,我將額外加 2 分。
Let us start with our first contender.
讓我們從第一位競爭者開始。
Oh, Optimus.
哦,擎天柱
Bless your heart.
祝福你
He is trying.
他正在努力。
Just like many others, he started out on a side quest, which then put him on the main storyline.
就像其他許多人一樣,他一開始只是做一個支線任務,然後就進入了主線。
One of his MrBeast videos does have over an hour of slop.
他的一個 "野獸先生 "視頻確實有一個多小時的泔水。
His second video is still over 15 minutes long.
他的第二段視頻仍然長達 15 分鐘以上。
Not much comes after that, though.
不過,這之後就沒什麼了。
Because of the lack of quantity, Optimus scores a total of 17 points, landing him in the Slop Slurper tier.
由於數量不足,擎天柱的總分只有 17 分,屬於 "泔水啜飲者 "級別。
Acheeto comes in with a more respectable slop game. 4 Chris Ava Tyson videos.
阿切託的泔水比賽更值得尊敬。4 克里斯-阿瓦-泰森視頻
He is hustling through the side quests.
他正在匆匆忙忙地完成支線任務。
Very impressive.
令人印象深刻。
Unfortunately, his MrBeast hustle is weak as shit in comparison.
遺憾的是,與之相比,他的 "野獸先生"(MrBeast)就弱爆了。
Now, the main question we have on all of our minds right now.
現在,我們每個人心中都有一個主要問題。
Is Acheeto focusing more on Chris Ava Tyson instead of MrBeast in Act of Transphobia?
在《變性人法案》中,阿切託是否更關注克里斯-艾娃-泰森,而不是怪獸先生?
Doesn't matter, because he earned 24 points, and he will sit comfortably in sloppy seconds.
這並不重要,因為他獲得了 24 分,在馬虎的秒速快三精準人工下注計劃中,他將坐得很舒服。
Had he made more MrBeast videos, he might have actually gotten to the Slop Slurper tier.
如果他能製作更多的 "野獸先生 "視頻,說不定還真能躋身 "泔水啜飲者 "的行列。
Tom has uploaded 3 MrBeast videos, 2 Chris Tyson videos, and 1 JakeTheViking video, adding up to a total of 30 points.
湯姆上傳了 3 個 MrBeast 視頻、2 個 Chris Tyson 視頻和 1 個 JakeTheViking 視頻,總計 30 個積分。
That is a respectable slop grind.
這樣的泔水研磨效果很不錯。
Unfortunately, Turkey Tom sucks eggs, so that's a minus 15 penalty for him.
不幸的是,"火雞湯姆 "的蛋很爛,所以他的罰分是負 15 分。
So, that would put him in, ooh, Slop Slurper tier.
這樣一來,他就成了 "泔水啜飲者"。
Yeah, that's, uh, that's pretty shitty.
是啊,那,呃,那是非常糟糕的。
If I was Tom, I'd be crying right now and seething.
如果我是湯姆,我現在一定哭得稀里嘩啦。
Very embarrassing.
非常尷尬。
My goodness, what a performance.
我的天哪,這表演太精彩了。
Much better than that last guy.
比上一個傢伙強多了。
Such fascinating work.
如此迷人的作品。
I am counting 6 MrBeast videos, with most of these videos being over 15 minutes long, and several Chris Tyson videos on top of that.
我統計了 6 個 MrBeast 視頻,其中大部分視頻都超過 15 分鐘,此外還有幾個克里斯-泰森的視頻。
If my math is correct, we have a total of 46 points.
如果我沒算錯的話,我們一共有 46 分。
Very respectable effort, Sensitive Society.
非常值得尊敬的努力,敏感協會。
The highest number we have so far.
這是迄今為止最高的數字。
Some ordinary gamers.
一些普通玩家
Okay, so Mudahar, like a smart individual, focused most of his slop stocks on JakeTheViking.
好吧,穆達哈爾像個聰明人一樣,把大部分泔水股都集中在了傑克-維京人身上。
Instead of Chris Ava Tyson.
而不是克里斯-艾娃-泰森。
Something Acheato should have done if he wanted more points.
如果阿切阿託想得到更多分數,他就應該這麼做。
But here's a clear difference.
但這裡有一個明顯的區別。
Because Acheato aimed for quantity, Mudahar is also tied with him with a similar score of 24 points.
由於 Acheato 追求數量,是以 Mudahar 也以 24 分的相似成績與他並列第一。
Had Mudahar just stayed on that slop grind, continuing to focus on Jimmy videos, he might have surpassed even Sensitive Society.
如果穆達哈爾能繼續保持這種頹勢,繼續專注于吉米的視頻,他甚至有可能超越 "敏感社會"。
Unfortunately, potential is wasted here.
遺憾的是,潛力在這裡被浪費了。
It's a good score, but could be a lot higher.
這是一個不錯的分數,但還可以更高。
Oh dear, oh dear.
哦,親愛的,哦,親愛的。
For the moist man himself.
為了溼潤的人自己
We only have one video here, and it's not even about Jimbo.
我們只有一段視頻,而且根本不是關於神保的。
It's simply a miscellaneous quest.
這只是一個雜項任務。
A single Chris Ava Tyson video.
克里斯-艾娃-泰森的單人視頻。
This display here is an insult to the slop grind.
這種展示簡直是對泔水研磨的侮辱。
Charlie unfortunately will be the first and only contender in the very bottom tier.
不幸的是,查理將是最底層的第一個也是唯一一個競爭者。
Your slopping didn't even kill one of my brain cells.
你的泔水甚至沒有殺死我的一個腦細胞。
August has a decent amount of slop quantity, along with 2 MrBeast videos reaching over 15 minutes. 2 regular MrBeast videos, and 1 side quest.
八月的泔水數量可觀,還有 2 個超過 15 分鐘的 "野獸先生 "視頻。2 個普通的 "野獸先生 "視頻和 1 個支線任務。
Ending with a total of 27 points.
最終總分 27 分。
Not quite top tier, but still a respectable performance.
雖然沒有達到頂級水準,但表現仍然可圈可點。
I'm sure if new news comes out about Jimbo, August will jump on that and add 2 more videos.
我相信,如果有關於神保的新消息,奧古斯特一定會第一時間添加兩段視頻。
Which would definitely push him into the top tiers.
這無疑會把他推向最高層。
My alt account TooLazyToTry has disappointed me.
我的輔助賬戶 TooLazyToTry 讓我很失望。
The slop hustle is weak here.
這裡的泔水喧鬧聲很弱。
We have 4 videos about the MrBeast situation, but after talking with the judges, we discovered that one of the videos is focused more on Chris Ava Tyson.
我們有 4 個關於 MrBeast 情況的視頻,但在與評審溝通後,我們發現其中一個視頻更側重於克里斯-艾娃-泰森。
Deducting 2 points from his score, from what would have been a 5.
從他的分數中扣去 2 分,本來是 5 分。
Ending in a total of, unfortunately, just 17 points.
遺憾的是,最終只得到 17 分。
However, just one Chris Ava Tyson video, or one Jake the Viking video, could push him into the next tier.
不過,只要有一個克里斯-阿瓦-泰森的視頻,或者一個傑克-維京人的視頻,就能把他推到下一個層級。
Saving his reputation.
挽救他的名譽
WestChet went the Achito route, and focused more on Chris Ava Tyson.
WestChet 走的是 Achito 路線,更關注克里斯-阿瓦-泰森。
Despite MrBeast videos giving you more points.
儘管 MrBeast 視頻給了你更多的分數。
There were 3 videos on the situation, but I will be adding bonus points due to the thumbnails.
在這種情況下,有 3 個視頻,但由於縮略圖的原因,我將加分。
The first thumbnail says she was 14, and the next thumbnail drops the age down to 13.
第一張縮略圖顯示她 14 歲,而下一張縮略圖則把年齡降到了 13 歲。
That is some beautiful slop.
泔水真漂亮
Adding the MrBeast videos and 2 bonus points, we get a total score of 26.
加上 "野獸先生 "的視頻和 2 分獎勵,我們得到的總分是 26 分。
Very commendable.
非常值得稱讚。
So, Dolan Dark covered the situation twice, and both videos are way too fucking long.
是以,多蘭-達克兩次報道了這一情況,而這兩段視頻都太他媽長了。
However, he still receives a measly score of 10.
然而,他的得分仍然只有 10 分。
We have a hardworking slop maker here. 4 MrBeast videos and 2 sidequests.
我們這裡有一位勤勞的泔水製造者。4 個 MrBeast 視頻和 2 個支線任務。
Solid performance.
表現穩健。
And we have to remember, over 15 minutes does add 2 bonus points.
我們必須記住,超過 15 分鐘會增加 2 個獎勵積分。
Helping Parlow earn a score of 28.
幫助帕洛獲得 28 分。
Ladies and gentlemen, here we have the cream of the slop.
女士們,先生們,這就是泔水中的精華。
The ultimate slopping that will be remembered by the history books.
終極蕩氣迴腸,永載史冊。
Pegasus only uploaded 2 Chris Ava Tyson videos.
Pegasus 只上傳了 2 個克里斯-艾娃-泰森的視頻。
Those are rookie numbers compared to Achito.
與阿奇託相比,這些都是菜鳥的數據。
Big whoop, right?
大驚小怪,對吧?
But what transpires after is an absolute masterpiece.
但之後發生的事情絕對是一部傑作。
Pegasus has not only uploaded a total of 7 MrBeast videos, but they're all past the 15 minute mark.
Pegasus 不僅一共上傳了 7 個 MrBeast 視頻,而且都超過了 15 分鐘。
And they're all within sequence of each other.
而且它們都在同一序列內。
Let us take a closer look.
讓我們仔細看看。
My god.
我的天啊
The titles.
標題
The thumbnails.
縮略圖
It's all just beautiful.
這一切都太美了。
I could feed off of this slop for a whole year.
我可以靠這些泔水吃上一整年。
All of these videos total up to a very, very respectable score of 55 points.
所有這些視頻的總分是 55 分,非常非常可觀。
But I will be adding an extra 5 for all 7 of the MrBeast videos being uploaded in a sequence.
不過,我會為所有 7 個按順序上傳的 MrBeast 視頻額外增加 5 個。
There is not one single break within these 7 videos about MrBeast.
在這 7 段視頻中,沒有任何一段是關於 MrBeast 的。
You are an American hero, Pegasus.
你是美國英雄,飛馬。
Alright, even though we're not going back to the last contender's level of slop, Kavos still performs respectably. 4 MrBeast videos along with 2 Chris Ava Tyson videos.
好吧,儘管我們沒有回到上一個競爭者的邋遢水準,但 Kavos 的表現仍然可圈可點。4 個 MrBeast 視頻和 2 個 Chris Ava Tyson 視頻。
And due to the length of some of the videos, Kavos lands with a grand total of 31 points.
由於部分視頻較長,卡沃斯的總得分為 31 分。
Putting him amongst the top tiers.
讓他躋身頂級行列。
OompaVille has a decent slop sprint. 3 MrBeast videos and 1 Chris Ava Tyson video.
OompaVille 有一個不錯的斜坡衝刺。3 個 MrBeast 視頻和 1 個 Chris Ava Tyson 視頻。
And due to the length of these videos, he earns 24 points.
由於這些視頻的長度,他獲得了 24 分。
Not too shabby.
還不錯
I'm sorry to say everyone, but we are ending on a whimper here.
我很抱歉地告訴大家,我們將在嗚咽中結束。
This pathetic slop attempt includes only 2 MrBeast videos along with 0 sidequests.
這個可悲的泔水嘗試只包括 2 個 MrBeast 視頻和 0 個支線任務。
Disgusting and deplorable.
令人作嘔,令人遺憾。
An absolute disgrace to your country.
這絕對是你們國家的恥辱。
Enjoy the bottom of the tier list with your 12 measly points.
用你那區區的 12 分,好好享受排名榜墊底的滋味吧。
But the good news is we have our top 3 slopsters earning their well deserved bronze, silver, and gold medals.
但好消息是,我們的前三名泔水選手分別獲得了他們應得的銅牌、銀牌和金牌。
Thank you for the participation and the entertainment.
感謝你們的參與和娛樂。