Thank you.

謝謝。

What kind of dark magic forgettery is this?

這是什麼黑魔法忘憂錄？

Oh, wait, there is one more problem with this computer.

哦，等等，這臺電腦還有一個問題。

Sometimes, it asks me to right-click to do something, but when I do, nothing happens.

有時，它要求我單擊右鍵做某事，但當我單擊右鍵時，什麼也不會發生。

Can you fix that? Hm, show me.

你能修好嗎？嗯，給我看看。

Look, even when I get closer...

你看，即使我走近...

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

你和我想的一樣嗎？

Uh-huh, that that little donkey just bit the dust.

那頭小毛驢就這麼死了。

Alas, yes, but also...

唉，是的，但也...

That it's us who need to teach her how to safely use the computer.

是我們需要教她如何安全地使用電腦。

Okay, let's assess the damage here.

好吧，讓我們來評估一下這裡的損失。

What do you mainly use your computer for?

您使用電腦的主要目的是什麼？

Oh, you know, same as everybody.

哦，你知道，和大家一樣。

Write emails, check stuff, read movies.

寫郵件、查資料、看電影。

You mean watch movies, right?

你是說看電影吧？

No, I read them.

不，我讀過。

Yeah, that's right.

是的，沒錯。

Okay, just show us what you normally do.

好吧，給我們看看你平時是怎麼做的。

Oh, I can never find the at. So this is how you type an email?

哦，我總是找不到 at。你就是這樣打電子郵件的？

What is that?

那是什麼？

My contact list.

我的聯繫人名單

Wait, so you keep everyone's email address in there and then type it into the computer?

等等，你把每個人的電子郵件地址都放在裡面，然後輸入電腦？

Yeah, easy-peasy.

是啊，輕而易舉。

Then I just press send.

然後我就按發送鍵。

Kix email?

Kix 電子郵件？

What is this?

這是什麼？

It's my mailbox.

這是我的信箱。

I saw a Christmas promotion for it at the post office.

我在郵局看到過聖誕促銷活動。

And it saves on stamps.

而且還能節省郵票。

Mrs. Mom, normal emails are easier.

媽媽，普通郵件更簡單。

Oh, sweetie, I wouldn't want to put all the elves who live inside the computer out of work, would I? Who are you sending this to?

哦，親愛的，我可不想讓住在電腦裡的精靈們都失業，不是嗎？你要把這個寄給誰？

Oh, Mickey Maintenance.

哦，米奇維護。

OMG, you're such a mom.

天哪，你真是個好媽媽。

Hey, watch your tongue.

嘿，小心你的舌頭。

What do you think OMG means?

你認為 OMG 是什麼意思？

Well, I don't know for sure, but if I had to guess, I would say, offend my grandmother.

嗯，我也不確定，但如果讓我猜的話，我會說是冒犯了我的祖母。

We need to teach you a little more Internet lingo.

我們需要教你更多的網絡用語。

What does TLDR mean?

TLDR 是什麼意思？

Toilet... doctor?

廁所......醫生？

Do you really think people on the Internet talk about toilet doctors so much you have to abbreviate it?

你真的認為互聯網上的人經常談論 "廁所醫生 "嗎？

Very funny.

非常有趣。

You're lucky you two are my bays.

你很幸運，你們兩個是我的寶貝。

What?

什麼？

My bays.

我的托架

My babies.

我的寶貝們

That's what it means, right?

就是這個意思，對嗎？

Mmm... yes.

嗯......是的。

Yes, it does.

是的，確實如此。

But I'm a bit worried about the way you talk online.

但我有點擔心你在網上說話的方式。

Let me look at your posts. Oh, my word.

讓我看看你的帖子。我的天

Jackie Wilson, tough morning today.

傑基-威爾遜，今天早上真難熬

Anniversary of the day my granddad was missing at sea.

我爺爺在海上失蹤一週年紀念日。

And you answer with a photo of a sad kitten saying R-O-F-L?

而你的回答卻是一張悲傷的小貓說著 R-O-F-L 的照片？

Yeah, receive our feelings and love.

是的，接受我們的感情和愛。

Right.

對

What else do you do?

你還會做什麼？

Sometimes I download cooking videos.

有時我會下載烹飪視頻。

I just got the iReadMovies thing. Okay, so what do you do at lunchtime?

我剛買了 iReadMovies 軟件。好吧，那你中午都做什麼？

I check out stuff I'd like to buy, but I never buy anything, though.

我查看我想買的東西，但我從不買任何東西。

Why?

為什麼？

Because I'm scared of getting my money stolen.

因為我害怕錢被偷。

It's happened before.

以前也發生過。

It's good to be careful, but you see that little fella right there?

小心是好事，但你看到那邊那個小傢伙了嗎？

If the padlock is on, it means you're safe.

如果掛鎖開著，說明你是安全的。

Oh, okay, then.

那好吧

So what do I do next?

那麼接下來我該怎麼做呢？

Just put it in the basket. No!

把它放進籃子裡不

Huh.

咦？

Really thought she was gonna chuck the computer away there.

我真以為她會把電腦扔掉。

Guys, please, I know I'm slow, but I'm not Interweb Explorer slow.

夥計們，拜託，我知道我很慢，但我不是網際瀏覽器的慢。

She made a browser nerd joke!

她開了一個瀏覽器書呆子的玩笑！

She's learning!

她在學習

I guess there are two types of people in this world, Darwin.

我想這個世界上有兩種人，達爾文。

Those who need everything spelled out for them.

那些需要把一切都說清楚的人。

What's the second type? Okay, what do I do next?

第二種是什麼？好吧，接下來我該怎麼做？

You just have to pay.

你只需付錢。

And you promise I won't get my money stolen?

你能保證我的錢不會被偷嗎？

Yeah.

是啊

And 99 cents.

還有 99 美分。