Ooh!

哦！

That'll be great. Why Sioux Falls?

那太好了。為什麼選蘇瀑？

I don't know.

我不知道。

I just kind of always wanted to go.

我一直都想去。

That's so fun.

太有意思了

By the way, Chelsea, I've been meaning to say I love your shirt.

對了，Chelsea，我一直想說我喜歡你的襯衫。

Where's it from?

在哪兒買的？

Oh, an Instagram ad.

哦，Instagram 上的廣告。

It just totally popped up in my feed.

它就這樣突然出現在我的版面裡。

The algorithm knows what you want to see, right?.

演算法知道你想看什麼，對嗎？

Too true.

真的。

Sometimes it does.

有時確實如此。

Totally.

完全正確。

Oh, wait. You guys, you know it's a fun game.

哦，等等，各位，我們玩個有趣的遊戲。

We show each other our Instagram Explore pages.

我們互相給對方看自己的 Instagram 探索頁面。

Yes, yes, yes! - Oh my god, I'm too scared.

好啊！- 天阿，我很害怕！

Okay, okay, okay.

好啦，

I'll go first.

我先來好吧。

Okay, this is so embarrassing.

好，這有點丟臉。

It's all cookie recipes.

全是餅乾食譜。

Share those with me.

分享那些給我。

Okay, and mine is literally just puppies.

好，我的完全都是小狗。

Not one human.

一個人類都沒有。

Oh, it's cute.

好可愛。

Okay, your turn, boys.

好了，輪到你們男生了。

Who's next?

下一個是誰？

No.

不要。

What?

什麼？

I'm not playing your little game.

我才不玩你的小遊戲。

Guys, come on. It'll be fun.

各位，別這樣。會很有趣的。

It will ruin the night.

這會毀了今晚的。

What?

什麼？

Mark, show us your phone.

Mark,，給我們看看你的手機。

I think I left it in the car.

我想我落在車裡了。

What is with you guys?

你們怎麼了？

If it's just a bunch of hot girls in bikinis, we can handle that.

如果只是一群穿著比基尼的辣妹，我們可以接受。

Let's just drop it, right?

就別管了，好嗎？

Are you on my phone?

你在用我的手機嗎？

Um...

嗯...

Uh-oh. Is it a bunch of butts?

糟了，是一堆屁股嗎？

Yeah.

是啊。

No.

才不是。

It's just like this one woman.

只有這個女人。

Hey there, my strong little man.

黑，我強壯的小傢伙。

What is this?

這是什麼？

I'm Yonisa Confidence, an online girlfriend for young men with self-esteem issues.

我是 Yonisa Confidence，一個為有自尊問題的年輕男性服務的網路女友。

So it's a self-confidence thing?

所以這是跟自信有關的東西？

I mean, Jon, why would you...

我是說，Jon，你為什麼...

Jon!

Jon！

Morning.

早安。

You were not sleeping.

你才沒有睡著。

I'm tired.

我累了。

Mark, give me your phone. - Oh, yeah.

Mark，把你的手機給我哦。- 好的。

Oh, my God.

我的天啊。

Is there a bird in here?

這裡有鳥嗎？

Oh, like an airport thing.

哦，好像是機場的東西。

There is!

有！

Oh, it's right there. - Stop.

就在那兒。- 停下！

There's no bird in here.

這裡沒有鳥。

Babe, look, I promise you, there's nothing weird.

寶貝，聽著，我向你保證，沒有什麼奇怪的東西。

It's just all Sidney Sweeney.

都是席妮·史威尼。

Wouldn't make me feel better, and that's not true.

那樣沒有讓我感覺比較好，而且也不是真的。

Hello, my chosen soldier.

哈囉，我的軍人。

It's all that lady?

都是那位女生？

I've never even seen these videos before.

我以前從沒看過這些影片。

Special thank you to Martin Herlihy for his $3,000 donation.

特別感謝 Martin Herlihy 的 3000 美元捐款。

You gave this bitch $3,000?

你給了這個賤人 3000 美元？

It's for a good cause.

這是為了做好事。

Look out for your mystery gift, Martin.

注意你的神祕禮物，馬丁。

Here's a hint.

給你個提示：

It's my stinky bathwater.

是我的臭洗澡水。

So it is a sexual thing.

所以這跟性有關。

Yeah, a sexual thing.

對啦，最好跟性有關啦。

Yeah.

對啦。

Yes, it is.

對，確實是。

Look at my beautiful breasts.

看看我漂亮的奶子。

Ben, give me your...

Ben，把你的...

What's up, baby?

怎麼了，寶貝？

Did you eat your phone?

你把手機吃了？

Did I eat my cell phone?

我把手機吃了？

Hey, brother, will you help me call 911?

嘿，兄弟，能幫我打 911 嗎？

Yeah.

好啊。

You don't mind?

你不介意吧？

Sure.

不會。

Thanks, dude. - Okay.

謝謝，老兄。- 好喔。

Hello?

你好？

Don't forget to join me at our second annual Confidence Con in Sioux Falls.

別忘了和我一起參加在蘇瀑舉行的第二屆信心大會。

That's why we're going to Sioux Falls!

這就是為什麼我們要去蘇瀑！

Okay, hey, guys.

好了，嘿，各位。

Listen, I'm sorry for eavesdropping, but I know those videos seem weird, okay? But right now, there is an epidemic of male loneliness in this country.

聽著，很抱歉我偷聽了，但我知道這些影片看起來很奇怪，好嗎？但現在這個國家流行男性孤獨症。

Look around you.

看看四周。

Maybe you need some confidence is exactly what they need right now.

也許你需要一些自信，這正是他們現在需要的。

Maybe we all need some confidence because the world right now is a pretty scary place.

也許我們都需要一些自信，因為現在的世界很可怕。

Also, your friend that swallowed his iPhone died a while ago.

還有，你那個吞了 iPhone 的朋友不久前死了。

Look at my beautiful breasts.

看看我漂亮的奶子。