Oh, hi there.

哦，你好

Hi.

你好。

Do you mind if I ask you some exit polling questions?

你介意我問你一些出口民調的問題嗎？

Uh, no, that's fine.

不用了

Great.

好極了

Thank you.

謝謝。

Um, who did you vote for?

你投給誰？

I voted for Mitt Romney.

我投了米特-羅姆尼一票。

And who did you vote for in 2008?

你在 2008 年投了誰的票？

John McCain.

約翰-麥凱恩

Okay.

好的

You're doing great, by the way.

順便說一句，你做得很好。

Thanks.

謝謝。

Uh, do you consider yourself a moderate Republican, a conservative Republican, a tea partier, a crazy wackadoodle, or a Democrat voting sarcastically?

你認為自己是溫和的共和黨人、保守的共和黨人、茶黨人、瘋狂的怪人，還是諷刺投票的民主黨人？

Uh, I guess a moderate Republican

呃，我猜是溫和派共和黨人

I guess a moderate Republican.

我猜是個溫和的共和黨人。

Great.

好極了

Uh, when you voted, were you like,

呃，當你投票， 你喜歡，

I love this guy!

我喜歡這傢伙！

Or were you like, he'll do?

還是你覺得他可以？

Or were you like,

或者你喜歡、

I don't know who any of these people are!

我不知道這些人是誰！

I guess he'll do.

我想他能行。

Uh, am I done?

我說完了嗎？

He'll do.

他會的

Am I done now?

我說完了嗎？

Okay, no.

好吧，不

Sorry.

對不起。

Um, are you male or female?

嗯，你是男是女？

I'm sorry.

對不起

Male.

男

Oh.

哦。

Glad I asked.

很高興我問了。

Okay.

好的

Which best describes your ethnicity?

哪個最能描述您的種族？

Are you white?

你是白人嗎？

Are you black?

你是黑人嗎？

Hispanic?

西班牙裔？

Asian?

亞洲人？

Or are you a robot?

還是你是個機器人？

White.

白色。

Okay.

好的

And to what age group do you belong?

您屬於哪個年齡段？

18 to 24?

18 到 24 歲？

Yes.

是的。

Sorry, I have to read them all.

對不起，我必須全部讀完。

18 to 24?

18 到 24 歲？

Or 25 to 150?

還是 25 到 150？

18 to 24.

18 至 24 歲。

Single or married?

單身還是已婚？

Single.

單身

Oh.

哦。

Great.

好極了

Uh, gay or straight?

呃，同志還是異性戀？

Uh, straight.

好的

Okay.

好的

Uh, Jewish?

呃，猶太人？

Yes.

是的。

You're perfect.

你太完美了

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

You're perfect.

你太完美了

Would you ever consider going out with my friend Dianne Finkelstein?

你會考慮和我的朋友黛安-芬克爾斯坦約會嗎？

No.

不

You know what?

你知道嗎？

It's probably for the best, because you're on the smaller side.

也許這樣最好，因為你偏小。

And she's so fat.

她太胖了

Are we done?

說完了嗎？

Um, almost.

嗯，差不多。

Almost.

差不多了

Okay.

好的

Oh, this is a good one.

哦，這個不錯。

Um, you walk into your bedroom and turn the light.

嗯，你走進臥室，打開燈。

Standing buck naked in the middle of the room is Ron Paul, Rick Santorum, or Newt Gingrich.

裸體站在房間中央的是羅恩-保羅、裡克-桑托勒姆或紐特-金裡奇。

Which one of these options bums you out the most?

在這些選項中，哪一個最讓你失望？

Wow.

哇

Oh.

哦。

Well, that's tough.

好吧，那就難辦了。

Ron Paul.

羅恩-保羅

No.

不

Newt Gingrich.

紐特-金裡奇

No.

不

Ron Paul.

羅恩-保羅

Remember, buck naked.

記住，要赤身裸體。

Oh, Newt Gingrich.

哦，紐特-金裡奇。

You got that one right.

你說對了。

Uh, can you sleep on planes?

你能在飛機上睡覺嗎？

Yes.

是的。

I can't.

我做不到

Do you like my new laugh?

喜歡我的新笑聲嗎？

Uh, yeah.

是的

It's fine.

沒關係。

Because this is my old laugh.

因為這是我以前的笑聲。

The new one.

新的

The new one is better.

新的更好。

Um, do you think I could pull off bangs?

你覺得我能留劉海嗎？

Uh, I don't know.

我不知道

What would that look like?

那會是什麼樣子？

Would it look like that?

會是那樣嗎？

Uh, yeah.

是的

Sure.

當然。

What about over one eye?

那一隻眼睛呢？

Uh, sure.

當然

Do you have a preference?

您有偏好嗎？

Like which?

比如哪個？

I don't have a preference.

我沒有偏好。

Please.

請。

Um, bangs.

嗯，劉海。

Bangs.

班克斯

Uh, I don't know.

我不知道

It depends what he wants.

這取決於他想要什麼。

It would be perfect for Diane.

這對黛安來說再合適不過了。

Uh, no.

沒有

Yes.

是的。

Again, probably for the best.

還是那句話，也許這樣最好。

So fat.

太胖了

She's so fat.

她太胖了

This is no longer about politics.

這不再是政治問題。

Okay, um, one second.

好吧，嗯，一秒鐘。

Which candidate quality mattered most in how you voted?

哪種候選人素質對您的投票影響最大？

Has a vision for the future?

有未來願景嗎？

Honest and trustworthy?

誠實可靠？

Stands up for what he believes in?

堅持自己的信念？

Uh, a vision for the future.

未來願景

All right.

好吧

Uh, follow up.

嗯，跟進。

What do you consider the most likely vision for the future?

您認為最有可能的未來願景是什麼？

Monkeys still in cages?

猴子還關在籠子裡？

Monkeys in charge?

猴子說了算？

Or no more monkeys?

還是不再有猴子？

Uh, monkeys in cages.

籠子裡的猴子

Okay.

好的

Follow up to the follow up.

後續行動的後續行動。

Have you seen the new Planet of the Apes?

你看過新的《人猿星球》嗎？

I have not.

我沒有。

Okay.

好的

Follow up, follow up, follow up.

跟進、跟進、跟進。

Would you be into this?

你會喜歡嗎？

I bring the Planet of the Apes DVD to your house.

我把人猿星球的 DVD 帶到你家去。

You open a bottle of wine.

你打開一瓶酒。

We forget about fat Diane and see what happens.

我們忘掉胖黛安，看看會發生什麼。

No.

不

Absolutely not.

絕對不行。

Final question.

最後一個問題。

Where do you get off?

你在哪裡下車？

I'm switching you to gay.

我要把你換成同志。

Robot.

機器人

I'm a robot.

我是機器人

I'm a robot.

我是機器人

I'm a robot.

我是機器人