Name: Leslie Liao | 我是直男......但是。 (Leslie Liao | I'm straight... but.)
Uploaded: 2024-05-22T03:00:35.000Z
Duration: 9 min 28 s

I don't know, like, I'm straight, so I'm attracted to men.

我不知道，比如，我是異性戀，所以我被男人吸引。

I love being a woman, but it's a lot of work, you know?

我喜歡做一個女人，但這是一項艱鉅的工作，你知道嗎？

Like, I have to wear makeup to look like a woman.

比如，我必須化妝才能看起來像個女人。

You guys are like, oh, I have my mom's eyes.

你們會說，哦，我有我媽媽的眼睛。

I'm like, oh, yeah, I have my dad's entire face.

我想，哦，是的，我有我爸爸的整張臉。

None of you know him, but you see it, right?

你們都不認識他，但你們看到了，對嗎？

So I have to wear mascara and blush every day to disguise myself as a young, beautiful Asian woman.

是以，我每天都要塗睫毛膏、打腮紅，把自己偽裝成年輕貌美的亞洲女性。

這是亞洲女性面臨的一個現實問題。

The young, beautiful Disney princess, Mulan.

年輕貌美的迪士尼公主花木蘭。

每個人都會說，先生，對不起，先生。

I glue on hair where there should already be hair.

我在應該有頭髮的地方粘上了頭髮。

It's like, guys, I know you'd be late to stuff too if you glued your balls on every day.

這就像，夥計們，我知道如果你們每天都把蛋蛋粘在上面，你們也會遲到的。

You guys should have been there, because we would have, you know...

你們應該在那裡，因為我們會......

I put up solid numbers on the board in my 20s.

我在 20 多歲時就在棋盤上取得了不錯的成績。

Because if you're a single woman, it's easy.

因為如果你是單身女性，這很容易。

They were hard for me to resist when I could just reach out and grab one.

當我伸手就能抓到一個時，我很難抗拒它們。

It's like, you know when there's a plate of fries on the table and you eat them even if you're not hungry?

這就像，你知道桌上有一盤薯條，即使你不餓，你也會吃掉它們？

I was like, okay, someone take these dicks away from me.

我當時想，好吧，誰來把這些雞巴從我身邊拿走。

不過，如果你要一個，我也要一個。

But in my 20s, I was single for most of it, and I used to be sad about it.

但在我 20 多歲的時候，大部分時間都是單身，我曾經為此感到難過。

Because I don't want to keep looking for this man.

I feel like when I finally find him, I'm going to act like a mom whose kid got lost at the grocery store.

我覺得當我終於找到他時，我會表現得像一個孩子在雜貨店走丟了的媽媽。

但如果你是工業家，那就很抱歉了。

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Leslie Liao | 我是直男......但是。 (Leslie Liao | I'm straight... but.)