Doesn't that sound odd?

聽起來不奇怪嗎？

Every guy in this room has a pillow,

這房間裡的每個人都有一個枕頭

but he has no idea where it came

但他不知道它是從哪裡來的

from.

來自

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

Every guy in this room has a pillow.

這房間裡的每個人都有一個枕頭

You've had one all your life.

你一輩子都有一個。

You don't know where it came from.

你不知道它是從哪裡來的。

Because guys don't buy pillows.

因為男人不會買枕頭。

You've never bought a pillow

你從未買過枕頭

in your life.

在你的生活中。

No, guys are issued pillows.

不，給男生髮的是枕頭。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

Right?

對不對？

I think when we're born we got

我想，當我們出生時，我們就有了

a name, a mom, and a pillow.

一個名字、一個媽媽和一個枕頭。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

I really think.

我真的這麼認為。

What?

什麼？

You've always had it.

你一直擁有它。

You took it for granted, right?

你認為這是理所當然的，對嗎？

Went off to college,

上了大學

took it into the dorm with you.

把它帶進宿舍

You don't know where it came from.

你不知道它是從哪裡來的。

Got your first apartment, there it

有了自己的第一套公寓

was, right there pillow.

就在枕頭邊。

There's my pillow, right there.

我的枕頭就在那兒

I lost my pillow, I freaked out.

我的枕頭不見了，我嚇壞了。

I'd had it forever.

我一直擁有它。

It's like, where am I going to get

這就像，我到哪裡去找

another one of those?

又是一個？

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

I ended up back at the information

我最終回到了資訊

desk, in a shopping mall.

辦公桌，在一個購物中心裡。

Right?

對不對？

A little information desk,

一個小小的諮詢臺、

with a little old lady right there.

和一個小老太太在一起

She goes, "what happened to the one

她說："那個

"you were issued?"

"你被簽發了？"

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

I don't know.

我不知道。

And then the saleslady goes,

然後售貨員就走了、

what kind of pillow do you want?

您想要什麼樣的枕頭？

Yeah, exactly.

是啊，沒錯。

One like I had.

一個像我一樣的人。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

A white one.

白色的

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

Stains, mine had stains.

汙漬，我的有汙漬。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

Looked like a map of Eastern Europe.

看起來像一幅東歐地圖。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

Is that still popular?

現在還流行嗎？

Can I get that?

能給我嗎？

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

If a woman comes into your life,

如果一個女人闖入你的生活

you get a lot of pillows.

你會得到很多枕頭

Like shoes, they like pillows.

就像鞋子一樣，它們也喜歡枕頭。

How many pillows should be

應該有多少個枕頭

on the bed sir?

在床上嗎，先生？

29, that's correct.

29，沒錯。

That's correct.

沒錯。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

I mean I go to bed at night,

我是說我晚上睡覺的時候、

I can't really lie down.

我真的不能躺下。

It's just like flying coach.

就像坐長途汽車一樣。

It's kind of like, oh.

有點像

Oh, this is great.

太棒了

No, this is nice.

不，這很好。

No, I'm fine honey.

不，我很好，親愛的

I'm fine.

我沒事

Hey, I can still see some

嘿，我還能看到一些

of the comforter right here.

的被子就在這裡。

Probably got room for another pillow

也許還能再放一個枕頭

right there.

就在那裡。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

And when you make the bed,

還有鋪床的時候

you have to get the pillows

你必須得到枕頭

in the right order.

順序正確。

Right?

對不對？

The first pillow is called the sham.

第一個枕頭叫假枕。

It's the sham.

這是騙局。

It's the biggest pillow on the bed.

這是床上最大的枕頭。

It has ruffles, that's how know it.

它有褶邊，所以我才知道。

And they call it the sham

他們稱之為騙局

because that's what it is.

因為這就是它。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

It's about $150 for that.

大約需要 150 美元。

They were going to call it the scam,

他們打算稱之為騙局、

but that was a little too obvious.

但這有點太明顯了。

Let's call it the sham.

就叫它 "騙局 "吧。

Then, the next pillow

然後，下一個枕頭

was the actual working pillow.

是真正的工作枕頭。

The one you sleep on.

你睡覺的那個

And then they even have smaller

他們甚至還有更小的

pillows, that go between the cracks

夾縫中的枕頭

of a larger pillow.

一個更大的枕頭。

I think those are called, grouting

我想這就是所謂的灌漿

pillows.

枕頭

I'm not sure about that.

我不太確定。

Have you ever seen a pillow

你見過枕頭嗎？

in the trash?

扔進垃圾桶？

We can't bring ourselves to throw

我們不忍心扔掉

a pillow away.

一個枕頭

I've never seen a pillow

我從未見過枕頭

in the trash.

扔進垃圾桶。

We don't throw them out after they

我們不會在它們

get old.

變老。

We stick them in the closet

我們把它們塞進壁櫥

for guests.

為客人準備

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

Put them up there in the linen

把它們放在亞麻布上

closet for guests.

供客人使用的壁櫥。

To become like a little wafer

變得像一塊小圓餅

over the years that go by.

年復一年。

Little brown wafer.

棕色小圓片

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）

If you have a sleepover

如果您有過夜活動

at somebody's house, you never want

在別人家裡，你永遠不想

the guest pillow.

客用枕頭

Right?

對不對？

"Can I get you a pillow?"

"要我給你拿個枕頭嗎？"

No, I've seen your fan mail,

不，我看過你的粉絲來信、

thank you.

謝謝。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾大笑）