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  • Welcome back to engVid. Here we are with a writing lesson.

    歡迎回到 engVid。我們現在進行一堂寫作課程。

  • We are looking at the skill of showing, not telling, and it's going to transform your writing as long as you put it into practice afterwards.

    我們將學習展示而非告訴的技巧,只要你在之後實踐,這將會改變你的寫作方式。

  • "Show, not tell. What's he talking about?"

    "展示,不要告訴。他在講什麼?"

  • When we're writing, we want to avoid simple statements that don't really add any description or flavour.

    在寫作時,我們要避免使用簡單的語句,因為這些語句並不能真正增加任何描述內容或風味。

  • For example: "The man was stressed."

    例如:"那人壓力很大"。

  • Boring.

    無聊。

  • Instead, I want you to paint a picture, I really want you to describe the man is stressed without telling me that he is.

    相反,我想讓你畫一幅畫,我希望你能描述那個男人感到壓力,而不是告訴我他感到壓力。

  • So how can you do that? We're kind of trying to avoid this word, and describe it instead.

    那麼如何才能做到這一點呢?我們試圖避開這個詞,而是用描述的。

  • So what's he doing? "The man was fidgeting."

    他在幹什麼?"那人坐立不安啊。"

  • Ah, he's fidgeting. He's so stressed, he can't sort of stay still. And biting his nails.

    他在坐立不安。他如此緊張,無法保持安靜,還咬著指甲。

  • Okay? So pick out a couple of details that show how the person was.

    因此,挑選出一些細節,展示這個人的狀態。

  • Next one: "The room was messy." Again, it's a simple, simple sentence.

    下一個:「房間很亂。」同樣,這是一個簡單的句子。

  • It's just one sort of main clause and it's not very interesting.

    這只是一個主要子句,並且不是非常有趣。

  • Much better to describe the items in the room that make it messy.

    更好的方法是描述使房間變亂的物品。

  • For example: "There was a leftover pizza, dirty clothes were strewn"...

    例如:"那裡有剩下的比薩、骯髒的衣物被散落"…

  • I'll write that word for you.

    我來幫你寫這個詞。

  • That means they were covering the floor.

    那意味著它們覆蓋著地板。

  • "..and there were dirty plates and cups".

    「...還有骯髒的盤子和杯子。」

  • Okay? These details give us the idea that it is messy.

    這些細節給了我們一個 "亂 "的概念。

  • Example three: "The woman was confident."

    例子三:「這位女士很有自信。」

  • Okay, but it'd be much more effective if you described how she was confident.

    好的,但如果您描述她是如何自信的,效果會更好。

  • So, how does she move? How do other people react to her?

    他怎麼走路的?他人對他的反應如何?

  • "She strode", that means she walked, but with purpose. Okay? So I've picked an interesting verb.

    「她大步走路」,著意味着她走路時很有目的。我選了一個有趣的動詞。

  • "She strode into the room, and everyone turned their heads to notice her."

    「她大步走進房間,所有人都轉過頭注意到了她。」

  • Okay? Much clearer, more vivid idea of confidence than just saying she was confident.

    明白了吧? 比只說她自信要清晰、更生動。

  • Example four: "The boy was careful."

    例子四:「男孩很小心。」

  • Tell us how he was careful.

    描述他如何小心。

  • "He placed his favourite magazine in the top drawer of his cabinet."

    「他把他最喜歡的雜誌放在櫃子最上面的抽屜裡。」

  • Okay? So we need to say exactly what he is placing, the object there has been missed out.

    所以我們需要準確地說出他放置的是什麼,那裡的物體已經被遺漏了。

  • "He placed"... There's no room for me to write it. You get the idea.

    「他放置了」……沒有空間讓我寫了。 你明白吧。

  • He places his favourite book or magazine, and look how specific it is: "the top drawer of his cabinet".

    他放置了他最喜歡的書或雜誌,看看它有多具體:「他櫃子最上面的抽屜」。

  • Next example: "The stadium was full."

    下一個例子;「體育場爆滿。」

  • Again, I'm bored with this simple sentence construction.

    再次,我對這種簡單的句子結構感到厭倦。

  • We need to make it more interesting. "The sound from the stadium was deafening", okay?

    我們需要讓它更有趣。「體育場的聲音震耳欲聾。」

  • And then give us some main action perhaps: "The sound from the stadium was deafening as the crowd rose up to chant the player's name."

    然後再給我們一些主要動作吧:「體育場的聲音震耳欲聾,當觀眾們高呼球員的名字時。」

  • Okay? Give the sense that the stadium is full from what you can see and what you can hear. Okay?

    讓讀者透過你的描述感覺到體育場座無虛席,既包括視覺上的感受,也包括聽覺上的感受。

  • A couple of ones to describe weather.

    有幾個可以描述天氣。

  • "It was hot."

    「很熱。」

  • Okay, well, a very young child could write a sentence like that, so if you're sort of a teenager or an adult, it's time to raise the bar.

    一個很小的孩子也可以寫出這樣的句子,所以如果你是青少年或成年人,現在是時候提高標準了。

  • How can we tell that it is hot? Well: "The sun was causing damage to",

    我們怎麼知道天氣很熱呢? 「太陽正在造成損害,」

  • "The sun was melting", "The sun was burning", "The sun was causing the lady's skin to turn red".

    「太陽正在融化,」「太陽正在燃燒,」『太陽使這位女士的皮膚變紅。」

  • Okay? Pick out details that show the effect.

    挑出能體現效果的細節。

  • "It was cold. It was cold." How do we know it was cold? How cold did it feel? What can you see?

    「很冷,很冷。」我們怎麼知道它很冷?感覺有多冷?可以看到什麼?

  • "Drainpipes were freezing, ice was as thick as"... I don't know.

    「排水管都凍住了,冰厚得像......」我不知道。

  • "It was three inches thick." Whatever, you've got to show details rather than just stating things.

    「有三英寸厚。」不管怎樣,你得展示細節,而不是僅僅陳述事情。

  • "It was windy."

    「風很大」。

  • "The umbrella was totally bent out of shape. The umbrella"-you know for keeping the rain off us-"was totally"-that means fully-"bent" -Yeah? Bent-"...out of shape", out of its normal position.

    「雨傘完全彎曲變形了。雨傘」——你知道它是用來擋雨的——「完全」——這意味著完全——「彎曲」——是嗎? 彎曲——“…變形”,偏離正常位置。

  • "He found it funny." Right? How funny did he find it? Okay? Better to...

    「他覺得這很有趣。」 他覺得這有多好笑? 最好...

  • For us to get the idea to picture what he was doing: "He was rolling around the floor in hysterics."

    讓我們想像一下他在做什麼:「他歇斯底里地在地板上打滾。」

  • Okay? When you're so... Find something so funny, you're like: [Laughs].

    你...發現一些有趣的事情, 你喜歡,你會笑成這樣。

  • Okay? He can't control his body he finds it so funny. "Hysterics", that means like totally lost control. "Hysteria".

    他無法控制自己的身體,他覺得這很有趣。 「歇斯底里」,意思是完全失控。 「歇斯底里」。

  • Okay? Hysterics. "In hysterics" means finding something really, really funny.

    好嗎?歇斯底里「In hysterics」是指發現一些非常非常有趣的事。

  • "The castle was captured." Right.

    「城堡被攻陷了」。

  • I want to get a sense of drama. I want to imagine what's happening there at the castle. Is the king having his head cut off?

    我想要感受到戲劇性。 我想像一下城堡裡發生了什麼事。 國王是不是要被砍頭了?

  • Are the new army marching in? What's happening?

    新軍要進軍了嗎? 發生了什麼事?

  • "The new flag was hoisted up on high, greeted by a cheer from the crowd."

    「新國旗高高升起,人群歡呼雀躍。」

  • Okay? Paint pictures, pick out details. Okay?

    描繪畫面,挑選細節。

  • It's good to have a range of adjectives, but how can you show those adjectives? How can you describe them instead?

    知道一系列形容詞固然很好,但要如何展示這些形容詞? 你該如何描述它們呢?

  • Thank you for watching today's video. Have a go at the quiz after this, and I'll see you very soon.

    感謝觀看今天的影片。之後請做個小測驗,很快再見。

  • Remember to subscribe. Bye.

    記得訂閱。再見。

Welcome back to engVid. Here we are with a writing lesson.

歡迎回到 engVid。我們現在進行一堂寫作課程。

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