I've seen enough movies to know that ghosts only haunt houses,

我看過很多電影，所以我很明白，鬼魂只在房子裡出沒，

not one-bedroom apartments.

他們不會出現在一房的公寓裡。

I've seen enough Hollywood movies to know that ghosts only haunt rich people's houses in the suburbs,

我看過很多好萊塢電影，知道鬼魂只在郊區的富人家裡出沒，

preferably with a newborn baby 'cause they got way too much to lose.

最好帶著新生兒，因為他們有太多可失去的東西。

Shit is high stakes.

這事風險高。

I live by myself. I ain't got nothing to lose. A ghost come haunt on me, I just move.

我獨自生活，沒有什麼可失去的。如果有鬼來困擾我，我只是搬走而已。

Worst come to worst, I lose my security deposit, fxxk it, you know. 

最壞的情況是，我失去了我的押金，算了，你懂的。

What's the ghost going to do?

鬼魂能拿我怎麼辦？

He's going to follow me from unit to unit.

一間一間跟著我嗎？

Start knocking on my light fixtures and shit. I'm like, "Hey dog, go ahead it's not mine."

他開始弄的燈具之類的東西。我會說：「嘿，伙計，隨便吧，反正那不是我的。」

"You fxxk around, we both get evicted, okay? You don't want to be a homeless ghost."

「你再搗亂，我們兩個都會被趕出去，好嗎？你不想當一個無家可歸的鬼吧。」

And if you really think about it, what kind of loser ghost haunt an apartment?

如果你真的仔細想想，什麼樣的魯蛇鬼魂會出現在一個公寓呢？

That means that ghost probably died in that apartment. He didn't even die a homeowner.

這意味著那個鬼魂很可能就是在那個公寓裡死的，甚至連個房主都不是。

I ain't got no respect for that shit.

我才不會尊重那個鬼。

He comes haunt me, I just started talking shit to him like,

他來煩我，我就開始對他發牢騷，比如說：

"Hey dog, what's your credit score when you died though, like for real."

「嘿，伙計，你死的時候信用評分多少啊，說真的。」