But what about someone who's reserved, anxious and quiet?

但是那些內斂、焦慮和安靜的人呢？

There's a difference between narcissism and narcissistic tendencies after all.

畢竟自戀者和有自戀傾向是有區別的。

Just because someone is arrogant and bossy doesn't necessarily mean they're a narcissist.

僅僅因為一個人傲慢和跋扈的並不一定表示著他們就是自戀者。

And having these certain personality traits does not constitute a diagnosis.

擁有這些特定的人格特質並不構成自戀者的診斷。

But narcissism actually comes in two forms: overt narcissism and covert narcissism.

但自戀者分成兩種：顯性自戀和隱性自戀。

At first glance, you probably wouldn't even realize someone is a covert narcissist because of how much more reserved in nature they seem to be.

乍看之下，你可能根本不會發現對方是隱性自戀，因為他們的本性比較內向。

Remember, this video is not made to attack anyone who may display these signs or anyone diagnosed with NPD, but rather to understand them and bring more awareness to the topic.

請記住，製作此影片並不是為了攻擊任何可能表現出這些跡象的人或任何被診斷患有 NPD 的人，而是為了了解並提高對該主題的認識。

This video is also not made to diagnose anyone with NPD.

這支影片也不是用來診斷任何人是否患有 NPD 的。

With that said, these are seven signs someone is secretly a narcissist.

話雖如此，以下是七個某人暗地裡是自戀者的七個跡象。

Number one, they often act passive-aggressive.

第一，他們經常表現出被動攻擊的行為。

Do you know anyone, maybe a friend, family member or colleague who often acts passive-aggressively to manipulate others and get what they want.

你是否認識任何人，也許是朋友、家人或同事，他們經常做出被動攻擊型行為來操縱他人並得到他們想要的東西。

A covert narcissist can't take no for an answer, but they also won't confront you about it because they want to make you look like the bad guy.

隱性的自戀者不能接受拒絕，但他們也不會就此與你對質，因為他們想讓你看起來像個壞人。

So instead, they'll give you the cold shoulder, tell you backhanded compliments or whisper snide remarks about you under their breath.

相反地，他們會故意冷落你，對你說一些反諷的讚美或在你背後講壞話。

All the while insisting that nothing is wrong and that they're not mad at you.

同時又一直堅持什麼問題都沒有，他們沒有生你的氣。

Covert Narcissists have an unrealistic sense of entitlement and want to demand special treatment from others without actually asking for it.

隱性的自戀者有一種不切實際的權利感，他們想要求別人給予特殊待遇，但卻不提出實際的要求。

Number two, they're easily envious of others.

第二，他們很容易羨慕別人。

Whether we like to admit it or not, the truth is a lot of us struggle with feelings of jealousy and envy towards others,

不管我們是否願意承認，事實是，我們之中有很多人都在與嫉妒和嫉妒他人的感覺之間作鬥爭，

but for most people this is because we can't help but compare ourselves to those around us and feel down when we don't think we measure up.

但對大多數人來說，這是因為我們忍不住將自己與周圍的人進行比較，當我們認為自己達不到標準時會感到沮喪。

For narcissists, however, their feelings of envy are excessive and rooted in the idea that they are superior to everyone else, so no one should ever outshine or outperform them.

然而，對於自戀者來說，他們嫉妒的情緒是過度的，並且他們比其他人都優越的想法深深植入在腦海中，所以沒有人應該比他們更卓越。

They resent other people for having the things they feel that they deserve more like wealth, power, success and popularity.

他們怨恨別人擁有他們認為自己應得的東西，比如財富、權力、成功和聲望，

And because seeing others succeed, gives them feelings of inadequacy.

因為看到別人成功，所以他們會感到信心不足。

A narcissist will often try to downplay the accomplishments of others.

自戀者經常會試圖貶低他人的成就。

Number three, they hold a lot of grudges.

第三，他們有很多怨恨。

Narcissists tend to hold a lot of grudges against others because they hold themselves in such high regard.

自戀者往往對他人懷有很多怨恨，因為他們對自己的評價非常之高。

So anyone who treats them with anything short of worship and unending praise is going to end up on their blacklist.

因此，任何不是以崇拜和無盡讚美的方式對待他們的人都會被列入他們的黑名單。

Now, a narcissist might not say anything at the moment, but they may already be seething with rage on the inside.

自戀者當下可能不會說什麼，但他們的內心可能已經怒火中燒。

Number four, they are highly sensitive to criticism.

第四，他們對責備高度敏感。

Remember what we said about narcissists having a superiority complex and holding themselves at an unrealistically high regard?

還記得我們說過自戀者有優越感並不切實際地高度尊重自己嗎？

Well, another way this can manifest is by being overly sensitive to criticism, especially for introverted narcissists as introverts tend to internalize their feelings more than extroverts.

另一種表現是對批評過於敏感，尤其是對於內向的自戀者來說，因為內向的人比外向的人更容易將自己的感受內化。

And while there are a number of reasons why someone would be highly sensitive to criticism, such as being highly sensitive person or struggling with low self-esteem.

雖然有很多原因會導致某人對批評高度敏感，例如高度敏感的人或與低自尊作鬥爭。

For narcissists, it's because any criticism can damage their perfect idealized view of themselves.

對於自戀者來說，這是因為任何批評都會損害他們對自己完美的理想看法。

They can't come to terms with the fact that they have flaws and make mistakes too.

他們不能接受這樣自己有缺點也會犯錯誤的事實。

Number five, they have false modesty.

第五，他們的謙虛是虛假的。

Narcissists need and desire lots of admiration from others.

自戀者需要並渴望他人的景仰。

And covert narcissists might try to get this by putting on a false sense of modesty.

隱性自戀者可能會通過假裝自己很謙虛來達到目的。

They put themselves down as a way of fishing for compliments and try to downplay their skills and successes in ways they don't really believe.

他們貶低自己來尋求讚美，並試著以他們自己都不相信的方式貶低自己的能力和成就。

Number six, they have self-serving empathy.

第六，他們的同情是為了私利。

A narcissist might seem like they're your friend, comforting you when you're down and cheering you on when you're happy.

自戀者可能看起來像是你的朋友，在你沮喪時安慰你，在你快樂時為你加油。

However, narcissists are self-serving and masters of emotional manipulation.

然而，自戀者是自私的，是情緒操縱的大師。

They're only empathizing with you because they want others to see them as someone kind, caring and compassionate towards others.

他們同情你只是因為他們希望別人將視他們為對他人友善、關心和富有同情心的人。

For example, they give money and food to the homeless only when there is someone else there to admire them doing it.

例如，只有當有人看到他們這樣做時，他們才會給流浪漢錢和食物。

They don't really care about other people except for what they think of them.

除了對他們自身的看法，他們其實並關心其他人。

And number seven, they think no one understands them.

第七，他們覺得沒有人了解他們。

Last, but certainly not least, playing once again into their ideas of superiority and specialness, covert narcissists will often complain about no one else being able to understand them.

最後但也很重要的一點是，隱性自戀者會再次利用他們的優越感和異於常人觀念，經常抱怨沒有其他人能夠理解他們。

And while you might feel bad for them at first, what they really mean is that they see everyone else's beneath them and struggle with being so much better than those around them.

雖然一開始你可能會為他們感到難過，但他們真正的意思是，他們看到其他人都在他們之下，並為了超越周圍的人奮鬥。

They will often remark about things like how they're so ahead of their time that no one else could ever appreciate their genius.

他們經常會評論諸如他們如何超前於時代以至於沒有人會欣賞他們的聰明才智之類的事情。

So, did anyone in particular come to mind?

有沒有特別的人出現在腦中呢？

Do you think someone you know might be a covert narcissist?

你覺得你認識的人可能是一個隱性自戀者嗎？

While we're definitely not saying that any of the signs we've talked about here, like feeling jealous of other people, feeling misunderstood or being sensitive to criticism automatically make you a narcissist.

我們的意思絕對不是說上面提到的任何跡象，比如嫉妒他人、感到被誤解或對批評敏感就會自動讓你成為自戀者。

It's important to understand that narcissism is so much more complex than what it's often made out to be.

重要的是要了解自戀比它通常表現出來的要復雜得多。

Spotting a narcissist isn't always easy, especially when they're masquerading as someone who loves and cares about you.

發現自戀者沒有那麼容易，尤其是當他們偽裝成愛你和關心你的人時。

Did you enjoy this video? Please like and share it with friends that might find insight in this video too.

你喜歡這個影片嗎？ 請按讚並分享給可能也會在影片中找到相同見解的朋友。

Make sure to subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification bell for more content.

記得訂閱 Psycho2Go 並開起小鈴鐺獲得更多新影片上架的通知。

All the references used are added in the description box below.

所有使用的參考文獻都放在下面的說明欄中。