think of us, whether we are deemed good or bad by the community…

為我們著想，無論我們被社會認為是好是壞...

This can quickly become a painful topic, and our thoughts can descend into bonfires of

這可能很快就會成為一個痛苦的話題，我們的想法可能會變成篝火。

worry: what if we are accused of something, what if we are ostracised and mocked, what

擔心：如果我們被指責，如果我們被排斥和嘲弄，怎麼辦？

about if we become a pariah?

如果我們成為賤民呢？

A useful way out of the panic was suggested many centuries ago by the Stoic thinkers of

許多世紀前，斯多葛派的思想家們就提出了一個擺脫恐慌的有效方法。

Ancient Greece and Rome.

古希臘和羅馬。

They suggested that we divide the topic of reputation into two.

他們建議我們把聲譽這個話題抽成兩部分。

On the one hand, who we are and what we think of ourselves.

一方面，我們是誰，我們對自己的看法是什麼。

And on the other: what other people may decide to declare or say about us.

而另一方面：其他人可能決定宣佈或說我們什麼。

The Stoics reminded us of an important detail.

斯多葛派提醒我們注意一個重要的細節。

We can never be certain of the second part of the equation; we can’t control the world

我們永遠無法確定方程的第二部分；我們無法控制世界。

beyond a certain point.

超過一定程度。

There is always the possibility that someone vengeful, mean or disturbed will say something

總有可能有人報復、刻薄或不安地說些什麼

about us and try to damage us.

關於我們，並試圖損害我們。

We can never be completely assured that they won’t.

我們永遠無法完全保證他們不會。

This might seem like alarming news, but the Stoics wished us to take it on board with

這似乎是一個令人震驚的消息，但斯多葛派希望我們能以

courage and then gain strength from focusing on the first part of the equation: what we

勇氣，然後從專注於方程式的第一部分中獲得力量：我們的

think of ourselves.

思考我們自己。

And here, things are far far brighter, because we are far more in control.

而在這裡，事情要光明得多，因為我們的控制力要強得多。

We can calmly evaluate what we’ve done, what our hearts are like - and we can then

我們可以冷靜地評估我們做了什麼，我們的心是什麼樣子的--然後我們可以

come to a view of what sort of people we are, which provides us with a vital bulwark against

達成對我們是什麼樣的人的看法，這為我們提供了一個重要的堡壘，以防止

the possible vagaries and tempests of public opinion.

公眾輿論可能出現的變化和風浪。

We have a solid anchor.

我們有一個堅實的錨。

We know who we are.

我們知道我們是誰。

Modern psychotherapy would add an important detail to this analysis.

現代心理治療將為這一分析增加一個重要的細節。

Our sense of who we feel we are is often highly distorted in a negative direction by our past

我們對自己是誰的感覺往往被我們的過去高度扭曲，向負面方向發展。

- which makes us far more jittery about public opinion than is sound.

- 這使我們對公眾輿論的緊張程度遠遠超過了正常水準。

Our sense of self is the result of how other people viewed us in childhood, especially

我們的自我意識是其他人在童年時如何看待我們的結果，特別是

our parents or caregivers.

我們的父母或照顧者。

Some of us wander the world with an acute sense of shame and self-distrust that we absolutely

我們中的一些人帶著強烈的羞恥感和自我不信任感在這個世界上徘徊，我們絕對

don’t deserve, and project a lot of paranoia and fear onto others - primarily because we

不值得，並將許多偏執和恐懼投射到別人身上--主要是因為我們

have been treated with disdain in our early years.

在我們早年的日子裡，一直受到輕蔑的對待。

We will start to feel a lot more solid and immune from the ups and downs of gossip once

我們將開始感覺到更多的穩固，並免於流言蜚語的起伏，一旦

we become conscious of how negatively biased we have been and settle in our minds what

我們會意識到自己有多大的負面偏見，並在腦海中確定什麼是最重要的。

we are worth - irrespective of either what figures from our past said or what someone

我們的價值--不管我們過去的人物是怎麼說的，也不管有人是怎麼說的。

around us now might suddenly decide.

現在我們身邊的人可能會突然決定。

The path to immunity from worry about reputation lies in a more secure and just handle on our

免於擔心聲譽的途徑在於更安全和公正地處理我們的問題。

own value.

自己的價值。