It doesn't matter how you fold a towel.

怎麼折又沒差。

It does matter how you fold a towel; if you want it to fit in the closet, you have to roll it.

當然有差！如果毛巾要放得進衣櫃，就得用捲的。

Oh my God, could you chew any louder?

天啊，你可以再嚼大聲一點啊！

This goes on here. It takes 2 seconds.

這要裝在這裡，只需要花你 2 秒。

Well, then the next person who comes in will do it.

這樣的話，就給下一個用廁所的人裝。

That's not the point.

那不是重點。

Hey, did you throw away my leftovers?

嘿，你把我吃剩的東西丟了嗎？

No.

沒有。

I could have swo—oh, you bitch!

我趕發... 喔，妳這個賤人！

What did you call me?

你叫我什麼？

Nothing.

沒什麼。

The toilet paper goes over. It's printed that way so you could see it.

廁所紙應該要從上面拉。花紋印在上面就是要讓人看到的。

No, the toilet paper goes under so that the cats don't get at it.

不對，應該要從下面拉，這樣貓咪才玩不到。

That makes no sense.

那一點都不合理。

What do you want to get for dinner?

你晚餐想吃什麼？

I don't really care.

我隨便。

Then just pick something.

那就隨便選個東西。

You choose.

妳選啊。

Told you!

就跟你說了吧！

Shut up.

閉嘴。

I don't see why I have to put the utensils face down.

我真的不知道為什麼餐具的頭要朝下放。

Because when they're sticking up like that, if someone trips and falls, they're going to impale themselves and die.

因為餐具尖面朝上時，如果有人不小心絆倒，他們就會被餐具刺穿死亡。

That's literally the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

這真的是我聽過最愚蠢的事了。

I'm not playing this game where I list every single thing and you shoot it all down; I'm not doing this again.

我不要再跟你玩這個我提議你否決的遊戲了，絕不！

Well, then I don't know what to tell you.

嗯... 那我也不知道該跟妳說什麼了。

Oh my gosh, watch this! This is the best line.

喔，這邊你要注意看！這句台詞最棒了。

Did you watch this without me?

你沒等我就先看了？

You weren't home!

你當時不在家啊！

Seriously? 6 more inches and it's in the sink!

你認真的嗎？只差 6 英吋就放進水槽了！

Well, then put it in 6 more inches. Get it?

那就移個 6 英吋放進去啊！懂嗎？

I get it.

知道了。

Anything will be fine.

吃什麼都可以。

- It's food.　- Fine, fine! Alright, we're gonna get pizza.

- 只是食物而已。 - 好，好啦！那我們叫披薩吃。

Anything but pizza.

只要不是披薩都好。

What do you wanna eat?

你到底想吃什麼？

That is Bill Paxton.

那是 Bill Paxton。

It is Bill Pullman.

是 Bill Pullman 才對。

Bill Paxton was in "Aliens". That is Bill Paxton.

Bill Paxton 有演《異形》。那就是 Bill Paxton。

That is him. Game over, man. That is that man right there.

就是他！你玩完了，老兄！那個就是他！

Why am I gonna put them away? I'm wearing them tomorrow morning.

我幹嘛把它們收起來？我明天早上反正還要穿。

I don't care if you're wearing them tomorrow morning. I don't want them just sitting by my side of the bed all night.

我不管你明天早上要不要穿，我不想要這雙鞋在我床邊一整晚。

Why do you do this? You squeeze from the bottom.

你為什麼要這樣？你應該從底部擠牙膏。

The next person doesn't have to squeeze then.

這樣下一個用的就不用再擠了。

It's toothpaste. It's not like it's hard to squeeze it from a new area on the tube.

那不過是牙膏，從新的地方開始擠有沒有多困難。

Why are we fighting about this?

我們幹嘛吵這個？

Why are we fighting about this?

我們幹嘛吵這個？

Why are we fighting about this?

我們幹嘛吵這個？

I'm sorry. I shouldn't have made you make the decision.

我道歉。我不應該逼你做決定的。

With that being said, I think your original call of pizza is fine. Just no pepperoni.

儘管如此，我覺得你一開始叫披薩的決定很好，只要別加辣肉腸就好。

What do you want on it then?

那你披薩上面要加什麼配料？

- Anything other than pepperoni.　- Oh my God...

- 只要不是辣肉腸就好。 - 我的天啊...

I'm going to murder you and when the pizza guy gets here, he's going to help me bury your body and then we're going to get married.

我要殺了你，等披薩小弟到了之後，他會幫我把你埋了，然後我就跟他結婚。

No, he won't, 'cause he'll probably be like, "Yeah, I feel you, bro."

不，他不會的，因為他大概會說：「兄弟，我懂。」